Jagged Edges
by dinky
Summary: Theirs a thin line between love&lust & Bonnie finds herself walking it with Damon. After years of denying Bonnie  finally succumbs to Damon & in the process finds herself in a torrid romance where lust&love blend toxicity. Bonnie/Damon/Mason.
1. Chapter 1

**A.N.** Hello everyone! This is my first vampire diaries fic, and my first story in a while so i hope you all enjoy it.

xoxo

queena

Disclaimer: I don't own tvd nor due i own the characters those belong to the respectable owners

**Chapter 1: Beautiful Mess**

For as long as I could remember, I had always been a hopeless romantic. It could have been because my parents used to love each other so much. Or it could have been a product of watching too many Disney movies where the girl got swept off her feet by the handsome prince. Although I had the pleasure of being in love, Tyler Lockwood would forever be branded on my heart, I knew their was something bigger and more dramatic for me. I didn't expect to find that wild and crazy, I love you...I hate you type of love in the arms of my worst enemy also known as Damon Salvatore.

_Flashback_

_something ugly this way comes_

_through my fingers sliding inside_

_It was nearly midnight and instead of being in the confines of my bedroom, I found myself standing on the Salvatore doorstop the pulsating heat while the summer rain falls upon me. I searched for the one person who could possibly help me...my best friend Stefan Salvatore. My life was in shambles yet again, and thankfully it was not my love life, or lack there of, my mother had run off and this time I knew she was really gone. The distant look in her eyes told me so, and I had a gut wrenching feeling that it was due to the man that had clutched her tight against him. I could still hear the sound of his voice as he spoke to me in his British accent, claiming that in time we would all meet again and then within a blink of an eye he was gone and so was my mother. I needed to find my mother and fix everything before it all fell apart. So I ran to the only person who could possibly help me, my best friend._

_With tear stained cheeks, I quickly pushed open the door the Salvatore manor to reveal nothing but darkness. If it weren't for the sound of Adam Levine bellowing out a tune of love and despair I would think that the place was empty of its usual occupants. Strolling further into the house, I found myself in the entertainment room where the drapes were open to reveal the pale moonlight._

_"Stefan." I call out only to hear the echo of my own words._

_"He's not here" came a bone chilling voice suddenly behind me. I knew I felt evil in this room, it was dark and dangerous and without having to turn around I knew who it belonged to. Damon Salvatore was back in town and I was sure he was here to bring misery with him. Quickly I spun around to see his cold eyes and menacing smirk._

_Damon and I had a complicated past that included a lot of hatred and even more anger. Our relationship...if that is what you wanted to call it was rather perplexing. For years we had flirted with the disaster that could be the two of us but nothing had ever come out of it. We had often walked a fragile line that left us teetering along the edge of admitted intense attraction which led to all consuming desire and utter disdain for one another. We walked a fragile line, but at least we walked it together._

_Jumping back at the close proximity, I spoke. " Wh- what are you doing here?" surprised to see him. Last I heard Damon had barely been home in the last week. In fact Stefan had gotten worried and asked me to do a location spell only to find that Damon had run off to Barcelona. I had thought he would be out coveting innocent women, stalking or doing worst trying to break up his brothers relationship._

_Wagging his eyebrows, he speaks."I live here, what's your excuse?" he shot out, giving me the once over before smirking. I watched as he downed the last of drink before quickly dashing off to fix himself yet another glass of what I could only guess was whisky. "Let me guess, you're here to surrender to my every whim." he asks a smirk forming on his lips. "Well then, clothes off, legs up and open wide." he grinned leering her way._

_"Damon, I'm not in the mood to deal with your shit." I said pushing past him and heading to the bar. I needed a drink. I was currently having the night from hell and I was spending it talking to the devil himself things couldn't possibly get any worst._

_"But I bet you're in the mood for Stefan!" he says before invading her personal space yet again. The mild irritation that crosses her features sends a jilt to his lower anatomy who was constantly betraying him when it came to the green-eyed beauty. There was something about her tonight that was so different from any other time he had been in her presence. Something he couldn't ignore if he tried. Her eyes were bright and shining with a hint of recklessness and loneliness that he knew all to well. The slow burn that usually felt whenever near her, was now at a fever pitch. It was time for the inevitable to happen. He felt it and he knew deep down she felt it as well. Tonight they were kindred, they were on the same playing field and it would be a shame to ignore such a thing._

_"Damon" I called tilting my head to one side while trying to keep distance between the two of us._

_"Tell me in my absence have you and my little brother finally crossed that line of friendship?" he asked while pushing a lock of hair out of her face to reveal deep green eyes._

_I let out a haggard breath, before setting him with a steely gaze. "For the last time, I am not hooking up with your brother, nor do I plan to in the distant or near future." I gritted out all the while trying to ignore the slow burn that I felt within me whenever I was close to Damon. It was always like this, whenever we were near each other the flames of desire would nip at me. Caroline had called it once unresolved sexual tension, and I had told her that she was crazy._

_For a moment he just stared at me as if I were the one to do say something crazy and then within a blink of an eye he was in my face studying my every moment. I couldn't help but fidget under his stare. ""You know after spending more than one hundred years with the saintly one, I still have a hard time figuring out how he manages to get the girls panties wet?" he said before moving almost predatorily her way._

_I rolled my eyes. "Oh god, not this again." I wailed already knowing where this was going. Damon was jealous of his brother and the relationships his brother was able to form with people. "Blah blah blah"_

_Ignoring her words, he spoke. "First Katharine fell for his whimsical charm, then Elena and now you" he said finally stopping so that he now stood in front of her trembling body. He eyed her curiously as to why she had been so silent upon her arrival. Usually she would have threatened to set him on fire by now, but tonight she was strangely silent, he wondered if he had hit a nerve._

_"Damon." I called feeling my eyes sting with tears. "Please." I begged hating the way my voice sounded so vulnerable. The last person I wanted to see me this way was Damon Salvatore._

_The last couple of months I had found myself sinking into some sort of black hole, a darkening edge was creeping its way into my very being and if I continued on this path, I was afraid of whom I'd become. I was lonely, and despite knowing I had so many friends who loved me, I still felt alone. And I had a feeling Damon knew what it felt like to be surrounded by everyone and still feel only. We both had Stefan and he loved us but I knew I was missing something and so was Damon._

_Once again he surprised me by taking a step closer. "What happened, did anyone hurt you?"_

_"No" I said turning around so that he was no longer looking in my face. "It's personal and I need a place to crash and this is the first place I thought to come because Stefan... can help me." I whispered ignoring the sting I felt when he blue eyes flashed hurtfully my way._

_Black, black heart_

_why would you offer more_

_"He's out with Elena." He says almost painfully. "Probably fucking her as we speak." He says coming closer to me as I take a step back. "What's the matter Bonnie, does the thought of my brother fucking your supposed best friend hurt." He asked a cynical smile creeping to his lips._

_Now it was my turn to smile. "Not really." I say causing him to immediately push me against the wall._

_"I call bullshit green eyes.' He slurs. "I've seen the two of you together it's far more dysfunctional then anything I've seen in more than a hundred years." He says amused by his own words. "I mean who spends most of their free time with the opposite sex without having sex?' he questions giving me one of those crazy eyed looks before continuing to invade my personal space. "If the situation were reversed I would have fucked you by now." He rattles leering my way_

_"As if that would ever happen." I say my voice trembling as the sound of the thunder roars through the air. In all honesty if Stefan and Elena wanted to be together, I was the first person who would jump for joy, I wanted my two friends to be happy and they were most happy together._

_He cups my face and I turn away from him. "Because you'd rather fuck my brother" he bites out harshly. "Well he's not here" he says suggestively as he gazes down at my body still trembling from the cold outside and my rain soaked clothes. He places his hand on my hip before dragging it up slowly underneath my soaked shirt. "You're trembling" he whispers as his lips move closer to mine. "You want me." He whispers so low that I have to strain to hear him._

_I had never ever been a fan of Damon Salvatore, in fact the only thing that even connected the two of us was the fact that we cared for Stefan and Elena, otherwise I could pass him on the street and not say a word to him. But I could admit that he was probably one of the most attractive men I had ever seen...well aside from Mason Lockwood. I had always been a sucker for the guy with dark hair and light eyes and Damon had fit that description perfectly with the added bonus of being a guy who was so rouge that you couldn't help but pay attention to him._

_"No" I say simply. "I don't want you." I say through gritted teeth as he nuzzles his nose into my neck. For some odd reason instead of firing away and asking questions when I have him on the ground and screaming in pain, I find myself eerily still, almost calm._

_Black black _heart__

_This was the main reason I had often avoided places alone with Damon because he could break me and would break me one day. I was extremely attracted to him and if I let myself give into temptation who then I'd be just another girl to the long list of girls that had fallen victim to his good looks and charms._

_Why would you make it_

_easier on me_

_In a flash he's removed the contents that were on a nearby table and is straddling me with a look that is so unfamiliar that it scares me. I've seen the many faces of Damon Salvatore, between hurt to love-struck but never so lustful. "Bullshit" he says pulling away from my neck to give me a devilish grin. " You need me, you want me" he slurs._

_All these blessing_

_All these burns_

_And he was right. I had never wanted someone so much in my entire life. I had only been with one other guy, Tyler whom I had dated during my high school days. With Damon pressed so intimately against me all I wanted was to give into the desire that was threatening to consume me. But if I gave into temptation and danced with the devil I'd never find salvation from my own demons._

_I squinted in his direction. "Not as much as you want me right now " I said with a fling of the wrist causing the two of us to switch positions. From my position on top, I watched as his blue eyes lit up at my challenge. Placing my hands on his chest I dug my nails into his skin before lowering myself to whisper in his ear._

_Search for pleasure_

_search for pain_

_"You're an egotistical, pretentious, jackass with homicidal and obsessive tendencies." I said while laying my hand to touch his cheek almost adoringly._

_"And you're stuck up, judgmental, prude with abandonment issues." He snorted out just as quickly, as he made a go for grabbing my hands and holding them above my head. I stared his way my chest heaving as he licked his lips in a manner that made me let out a shaky breath I had no idea I was holding._

_And then it happened. Suddenly his lips came crashing down onto me hard and wet and I couldn't help but let out a staggered moan. My head was telling me to run as fast as I could far, far away from the pure evil that was Damon but my body had never felt so free. He easily picked me up gripping my thighs as I assaulted his neck with hard kisses. There was something primal about the way I felt whenever I was near Damon he made me want to let go of everything I had held so dearly to me._

_Quickly I pushed him away as a need for air became apparent. "I'm not stupid, your in pain probably because you've realized that chasing after your brother's girlfriend will get you nowhere and I'm feeling reckless." I stammer out while the sound of my wild heartbeat is filling my ears._

_Grinning he snaked a hand around my waist. "All the better reason to " he says while rocking his body forward which in turn causes me to let out a long suppressed moan. "I'm your ticket away from whatever it is your running from." He says while kneading my flesh_

_"And I'm the girl who will take your mind off the one you can't have." I say a grin playing on my lips._

_We both knew that this would be a mistake that we would regret this whole thing later, but that seemed so far away. I waited for him to say something...anything but the only thing he did was raise my soaked shirt up to reveal my belly before tonguing it down._

_His lips came crashing down onto me hard and wet and I couldn't help but let out a staggered moan. My head was telling me to run as fast as I could far, far away from the pure evil that was Damon Salvatore but my body had never felt so free. He easily picked me up gripping my thighs as I assaulted his neck with kisses. I couldn't get enough of touching him and enjoyed the way his breath hitched whenever I rocked against him._

_Our mouths dance together as our teeth clash and our tongues duel. I had no idea that a kiss would feel so exhilarating...so thrilling. And for the first time I feel like Damon and I finally understand each other._

_In a rush our clothes were shed leaving him in snug black boxer briefs and me in a pale pink bra and panty set. No words were spoken between the two of us, we communicated through our eyes because words would ruin the moment. Timidly I ran my hands up and down his strong chest as he watched me with a lust-filled gaze. I wasn't stupid, I knew that at some point this would happen and if the two of us hadn't been so screwed up, it wouldn't have happened tonight, but it would have happened sooner or later and it was time to do what we both knew was inevitable._

_Before I can blink, I've found myself laying down with the devil pressed firmly against me in the most delicious way. A smirk is playing on his lips as he looks down at me with dancing eyes. "This is what you want, isn't it?" he asked_

_Raising up on my elbows I eyed him. "I thought we already established that." I said just as his mouth made contact with my panty line._

_With a smile tugging on his lips, he spoke. "I need to hear it- say the magic words Bonnie and I'll give you what you've always wanted." He said before going back to the task of placing kisses on her inner thigh leading to what had made his mouth water with lust._

_My breath hitched as he got closer and I knew that I was a goner. "I want you Damon." I said in a breathy whisper and it was then that our eyes locked and something flickered between us. Maybe it was lust brought spurred on by recklessness. Whatever the reason the tiny gap between us was bridged and I pressed my body into his as close as possible. The coolness of his body was welcomed because I felt like my body was set a flame._

_His cool hand trails from my face downwards beneath my clothes and soon im naked as his fingers string me like a guitar. "So wet" he murmurs as I close my eyes. I had always had a thing for guitar players and I could see Damon playing something funky like the bass or maybe something sexy like the electric guitar._

_He presses into me so deep that I feel as if I might just break and before I can blink we are moving. Our bodies are slicked with sweat as we move effortlessly in sync and it was then that I knew my life would change._

_When it was all over the two of us, lay stunned silently. I kept thinking about what I had done, and how if only for a moment being with Damon had taken me away from reality, away from the fact that I would still have to face my father and tell him that my mother left, for real this time and that she was never coming back._

_"Don't you ever get tired of it?" Damon muses aloud startling me so much that I look his way while picking up the array of clothing that is scattered along the floor._

_"Tired of what?" I asked deciding to give him the benefit of the doubt. I wasn't a fool I knew that Damon was running from something just as I was, the truth hurts and we both had obviously come to the same conclusion tonight, or else we wouldn't have slept together._

_Walking over to the bar, he poured himself a drink slowly sans clothing and without shame. I rolled my eyes reminding myself that this was Damon and whatever game he was playing was probably only the beginning. I watched him watch me and couldn't help the chill that ran up my spine. It was almost like his fingers were dancing along my spine._

_"That untarnished Halo of yours" he whispers, soon breezing across the room so that he words can nip my ear. His hands roam about my shoulders and instead of stopping him I allow things to continue. I can feel the cool breeze of his breath dancing along my neck and I know he's testing me, seeing how far things can go and for the life of me I don't stop him._

_I close my eyes as his lips land along my neck and without even thinking I turn around and our lips meet again. "The hell with the halo" I say quickly pushing him on the ground and claiming his lips. If I were going to hell then so be it, at least I'd go out with a bang._

_End of flashback_

**B-D-B-D**

That first night had changed everything in my world and for once in my life I had felt inhibited by the restrictions I had put on myself. In the beginning everything with Damon resolved around one thing and one thing only, sex. We did it anywhere, everywhere and all the time. And somehow it had turned into more then I think either one of us had expected. One year later we were still together.

I had always thought the notion of Damon and I together was a train wreck always in the making, we were so wrong for each other and tolerated one another because we both loved Stefan and Elena. But somehow we had made some sort of normal life together. Pain had brought us together, and love had kept me chained to his side despite our differences.

What I loved most about my relationship with Damon was the fact that it was different from anything I had ever experienced and it was so much different from those of my friends. We didn't have the typical kind of story book romance.

No we could never have a romance like Stefan and Elena because we were completely different. In some weird way we were one in the same we were both strong willed and stubborn, not to mention completely jealous but at the end of the day we had each others back. Damon knew that I would never toy with his emotions the way Katharine and even Elena on some level, had done for so long. And I knew that Damon would never leave me like everyone else in my life had done because like me, he had been shut out and left in the cold, by his father and by the woman he had loved for more than a hundred years.

_Its like you're a drug_

_Its like you're a demon_

_I cant face down_

It had been a long week, full of much chaos as possible. Katharine had spent a week playing mind games with all of us and it had caused quite the rift in our very foundation. Slowly the chips were beginning to fall around all of us and if we weren't carful we could lose not only our friendship but our lives as well. Elena and Stefan had broken up under the pressure of trying to keep things together. And Damon and I were doing no better. We were fighting constantly due to the change in his behavior simply because Katharine was back and she wanted Stefan. I didn't know what was worst, knowing that Damon was jealous that Katharine had wanted Stefan, or the fact that he had spent most of his time mooning over Elena. Damon liked Elena because she was the anti Katharine and she was capable of giving him the love he had wanted so desperately from Katharine, and the sad thing about that was, it was true. It was possible that Elena could love both Stefan and Damon. And that notion had left my personal relationship with Damon teetering over a ledge.

_Its like I'm stuck_

For weeks I had tried to ignore the feeling that was in the pit of my stomach but I couldn't ignore it any longer. Damon wanted Elena, he had always wanted Elena and now that she and Stefan were finally broken up who was I to stand in the way of the second great love of his life. I had seen the writings on the wall, I knew that Damon had wanted to do to Stefan what he had thought Stefan had done to him, he wanted to take someone Stefan loved away from him and that person was Elena. And the thought alone reminded me of where I stood in this whole love rectangle plus one. And today had been the last straw.

_Its like im_

_running from you_

_all the time_

I had stormed into the house locking the doors and praying that he wouldn't follow. I had been waiting for this night for a very long time and my boyfriend was nowhere to be found. For starters Damon had shown up four hours late, apparently Elena had car trouble and instead of calling the plethora of guys that could help fix a flat tire which included Jeremy, Matt, Ric, Stefan or Tyler not to mention a towing company, Elena always being the damsel had called Damon and he came strolling in like the dark night. The problem with the scenario was not that my boyfriend had run off to save another girl without much of a word to me, but the fact that drinking had turned into dancing which in turn caused him to be late. Then when Damon had finally decided to show his smug face, he was still sporting a smile that had always been reserved for Elena. His eyes were glossy with the glimmer of hope she had given him and his love sick look had been the last straw for me. So I did what any other self respecting girl would do in my situation I offered to end things for our sanity. And that hadn't gone well.

Surprisingly Damon had soon busted through the door an annoyed look on his features. He was in my face in a matter of seconds his eyes bleeding black as if he were truly upset by the notion of the two of us breaking up. I had found that hard to grasp especially since I knew whom he really wanted.

"Are you serious about this Bon? About us breaking up because I won't chase after you." He said eyeing her carefully. The hurtful words tumbled out of his mouth despite the fact the hurt look on her face had left him feeling unsettled. He had never thought that one day he would grow to care for the judgmental witch but she had become something to him. Bonnie could look at him and read him like a book, she didn't put up with his mess and he liked that about her. Bonnie was the only person he could possibly spend hours with fighting back and forth and then spend countless hours making up with. She was his firecracker and he didn't know what he'd do without her because she had finally brought back light into his life. At the same time, he knew time was running out for the two of them, he loved Elena, he just couldn't get Bonnie out of his system. He knew just as she that things between the two of them would not end well, especially since Elena and Stefan had broken up. This was his chance to finally get the girl, and he couldn't risk missing his chance with Elena even if it meant ignoring what he felt for Bonnie.

_And I know, _I let you__

_have all the power_

His words stung, and I bit back a gasp, although I had known it to be true for a very long time. Damon and I were never supposed to be together. It was a fluke we had lasted this long. People said that we were inevitable that our daily fights would one day become more and they were right. One night of self loathing led to hate sex had turned into something I had never thought would ever happen to me...especially with him. I had fallen in love with the one person I had told everyone to run from and all it did was bring pain my way.

On a good day I loved Damon Salvatore. I loved that he pretended to be this bad ass when really he was just as wounded as the next person. On a good day I could look at Damon and know the reason I fell for him was because he was beautifully broken with jagged edges that were a reflection of my own. On a bad day I realized the beautifully broken man I had fallen for had cut me with his jagged edges and each cut hurt more then the last. And during those times, I hated Damon for all his faults, he selfishness, his jealous fits over my friendship and bond with his brother and most of all because he made me fall in love with him by showing me the man behind the big bad vampire dressed in black facade.

"Of course you won't." I said inhaling a big breath. "I'm neither Elena nor Katherine." I said letting out a bitter chuckle. "I do find it amusing that you chased after Katharine for one hundred and fifty years, and Elena for two years," I said sparing a glance in his direction. "All in the name of _love_, but for me…" I said pausing as I swallowed the pain.

"Bons, why are you doing this?" he said reaching out to touch her face.

Immediately he retracted his hand, not because she had burned him or anything but because he knew this was inevitable. The two of them getting together had been inevitable and the two of them breaking up because of his devotion, to another woman, was inevitable as well. He was a greedy man, always had been he wanted it all, Bonnie and Elena, preferably together but he knew that- that would never happen. Bonnie wanted more then he could give her and if he was someone like Stefan he would let her go because being with him caused her pain because she knew like he did, that things between the two of them would not end well, especially since Elena and Stefan had broken up. This was his chance to finally get the girl, and he couldn't risk missing his chance with Elena even if it meant ignoring what he felt for Bonnie.

_Its like the only company_

_I seek is misery_

I gave him a weak smile. "Because you _love her_." I said almost brokenly. "And I've been lying to myself thinking that we could ever be more then this..._this mess_. I'm never going to be as doe eyed as Elena or as wickedly as Katharine and if you can't accept that then I'm not enough for you." I said pausing as he linked our fingers together. "Im not enough for _you._" I whispered out.

Damon and I had been fooling ourselves to thinking that we could ever be truly happy together. He would always pine away for Elena and I would always resent the fact that he could never love me the way I needed to be loved. Elena would always need to be rescued and Damon would always rescue her.

"I never said that you weren't enough for me." He said quietly. For once he didn't do anything wrong, he hadn't drained anyone in what felt like eons and he hadn't cheated on her once yet he goes to help Elena and its back to popped blood vessels and burnt clothes. Sharply he turned her way narrowing his eyes slightly. "You know, once upon a time you would have been glad I helped your best friend but now since you and Stefan are connected at the hips, it seems like im the only friend Elena has since you've left her for my gloomy brother in the bff department." He rattled off perfectly.

I glared his way. "Really you're going to bring up Stefan, who is like a brother to me."

I let out a tired sigh before running my hands through my hair. I was so tired of Damon bringing up Stefan and bringing him into the equation. Yes Stefan was my friend, he had been my friend long before Damon and I had gotten together and he'd still be my friend after Damon and I broke up. Stefan understood me and he was the only person I had who I knew I could depend on. I loved Elena she was like a sister to me but she was too wrapped up in her own life to even bother to notice that she might be wrecking mine.

He glared in return. "He's the man you run to whenever things between the two of us go sour. Whenever things between us go wrong Stefan and his gloomy face and brooding forehead is standing with open arms ready to save you from little ole me."

This thing with Bonnie, and Elena was beginning to wear him down, he was tired of fighting it, tired of what he was feeling for Bonnie and what he couldn't help feeling for Elena. Everything had been easier when he couldn't feel at all, and now here he was stuck between two girls that he knew he didn't deserve. He knew the moment he and Bonnie got together that he would wreck her and the ticking time bomb that was their relationship was getting louder as the blast off date was getting closer.

"So what, if I went out with Elena, I came back here for _you_." He said before walking over to the bar to fix himself another drink.

_You've taken over me_

_its like I'm not me_

"Did it ever occur to you the reason I need my boyfriend tonight, that their was a reason I wanted you to be here..in my home?" I asked to which he tilted his head. "No you were too busy off playing dark knight to Elena and her latest distress.

He raised a brow. " I'm guessing you had an itch only I could scratch!" he joked but only got a stoic look. "What do _you_ want from me?" he asked stretching his eyes.

Grabbing the collar of his black shirt I broke down. "Just tell me the truth for once Damon" I said as a tear slipped out of my eyes. " I deserve the truth." I said looking up at him. I watched as he bit his lip, in almost a shy manner and it dawned on me. Damon would never tell me the truth, not the whole truth. Never had silence spoke so loud. Stepping back I shook my head at him as if it were the last time. And then I turned to walk away but he quickly grabbed my forearm.

_Its like I cant breathe_

_I cant see anything but you_

"You don't want to do this Bonnie, I know you- you fight for everything and everyone and you cant stop fighting for us because its not in your character- you don't give up and neither do I." he said his lip curving up. "Its why we're so good together."

_Nothing but you_

_I'm addicted to you_

I couldn't do this anymore. It was killing me, Damon was killing me, he was sucking the life out of me like a leech and if I stayed with him-I'd die. I had been dying for months but I believed that you cant just give up because something gets difficult but I was ready to give up now. The tiny moments of good times I had with Damon weren't enough to outweigh the bad and I was losing myself with each day that passed.

"You need to leave, now" I said jerking my arm away from him. "We both knew it was only a matter of time," I said pausing to bite my lip. "So lets just end it now because if we don't its just going to happen tomorrow or the next day or the day after that." I said turning my back to him. We were a train wreck, and needed to get away before we crashed and burned.

"Why?" he asked his real emotions beginning to show.. The mask that he had been wearing for so long slipped momentarily, because the girl with the green eyes looked to be giving up on him...on them.

_Its like you're a leach_

_sucking the life of me_

I felt the first prickle of tears threatening to spill over. I had made it a habit to never cry in front of Damon but I felt like my armor was beginning to slip because I was tired-so tired of it all.

"Because I'm tired." I exclaimed. "Can't you see that this is hurting me?" I asked causing him to stare my way. "I can't do this anymore, I cannot continue to fight for you when you aren't even sure you want me." I bellowed causing him to take a step closer to me.

"I want you." he says licking his lips. His words were simple and of course no way near the words he was sure she wanted to hear but he hoped it had given him more time to sort a few things out. He had wanted her the way a man wanted a woman...and no it wasn't love...not for him but it was something that he wanted to keep to himself...for himself.

I clicked my tongue at his words. "You don't want me, you want some prize and Elena is the prize. Im just the girl that you settled for because who you really wanted wasn't ready for you." I voiced whilst stepping back from him.

"I've always wanted you...even when I was threatening you- I always wanted you." he stammers out. His words are rough as he remembers all the times he spent with her prior to them becoming who they are today. Even when he was screaming in her face, threatening to kill her and everyone she cared about he knew in the back of his mind that he had wanted to run her against the wall. To feel her smooth butterscotch skin beneath his...sliding against his.

"Because of the sex right?" I questioned a brow raised. "We've been together for a long time now, and I still feel like the girl who gave it up to you on a whim. It like we have no emotional connection- your not emotionally infested in me...your girlfriend." I said folding my arms across my chest. "I'm just another Andy Star." I said hating the way my voice choked up at my admission.

Without thinking he reached for her bringing her closer to him. "Don't do this." he said feeling helpless. "Don't ruin what we have going because I'm not prince charming."

_Its like I cant breathe_

_without you inside of me_

"Why are you fighting this?" I asked simply. "I'm not Elena, nor am I Katherine. I'm nothing like the women you love and cherish so much." I say my eyes trained on him. "I'm Bonnie and your Damon and we..." I said pausing as I felt my lip tremble.

_In my thoughts, _in my dreams__

_your taking over me_

Before she could finish her words he swooped in a kissed her with everything he had. She was in his veins making his blood run hot with a slow burn that hadn't existed for so long. She didn't believe that he wanted her so he would show her the best way he could. Words had always gotten in the way when it came to the two of them, so he showed her with his mouth, with his body. He peppered her face with kisses. He showed her how much he wanted her, how sorry he was for hurting her, by running his nose along her wrist and lastly he showed her worth by taking her to bed and holding on for dear life. It may not have been love but it damn sure close to it.

_And I realize_

_I'm never gonna_

_quit you overtime_

song credit: kelly clarkson- addicted, david usher- black black heart


	2. Chapter 2

__A.n. Hello everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful thanksgiving and if you went shopping over the last couple of days I hope you had fun, i know i did! Thanks for everyone who had read, replied or put this story on their alert list, it really means a lot to me. As always I hope you enjoy this chapter.

xoxo

queena

_You know what men want. Men want the damsel in distress. They want the damsel to save them, from themselves."_ Erica Kane

**Chapter 2: Heartfelt lies**

i_m trying hard to pretend_

_it wont happen again_

_and again like that_

After my big fight with Damon I had every intention on letting him go and moving forward with my life. I hadn't anticipated falling right back into things with Damon, but there was something about him that wouldn't let me run away even if I wanted to. He was standing in my face finally fighting for the two of us, fighting for me and although I knew this was all to pacify me, I couldn't let him go. I had fallen for him, hard very hard and even though I knew that the end result would most likely crush me, I couldn't let him go. I loved him- god I loved him, it was the kind of love that was consuming the type that made you feel like you couldn't breathe whenever the person was near you and when you were apart all you wanted to do was rush to be at their side.

I wasn't naive enough to think that what we had could ever take the place of Katherine or Elena all I knew was that when we were together we fit. Damon had once given the analogy of a drug addict and I had to agree we were dependent on each other and probably highly addicted that was why it was so hard to let go because sometimes it was like we needed each other to function properly.

"Bonnie, so nice to finally see you I'm glad you're finally coming up for air." Caroline cooed in her mock pissed but slightly proud voice.

I rolled my eyes. "It hasn't been that long." I dead panned. "I spoke to you yesterday." I reminded her.

"Yes, but you've been shacking up at the Salvatore manor doing god knows what." She said with an eye roll. "You do realize that you and Damon are the definition of dysfunctional unhealthy relationships." Caroline pointed out.

"Thank you very much have you been watching Dr. Phil again?" I asked a smile on my lips.

"Are you avoiding the situation again?" she posed a manicured brow lifted. Shrugging her shoulder, she spoke. "I'm just saying. He's probably got you to swap blood and everything" she mused while looking through a magazine. Dropping the magazine at the mere silence of her best friend, she spoke. "Seriously B! You've shared blood?" Caroline asked scandalized.

Subconsciously I tugged my long hair in front of my exposed neck. "Okay, we are not getting into this in public" I whispered looking around to spot Matt at the bar. The last thing I wanted to do was get into it with my vampire friend about my vampire boyfriend whom I had shared blood with, in the heat of the moment. It was bad enough, I got a lecture from Stefan about what kind of bond forms between a vampire and whomever he's shared blood with. Just thinking about it made me shudder.

"Ok, I may be a newbie but, even I know that- that is not a good thing." Caroline continues bringing her voice down to whisper.

I rolled my eyes I didn't need to hear about how bad Damon was for me, I had known that all along. It was why I had kept my distance from him in the past, I knew that we were going to end up here and it scared the hell out of me.

"Next topic please." I said exasperated but the mere thought of the train wreck that was Damon and I. I didn't want to have to defend myself or my relationship. I just wanted to hang out with my friend and catch up without talking about boys and bad guys that were trying to kill us.

"Ok," Caroline exclaimed her eyes dancing. "Lets talk about the reason you didn't dump his sorry ass after that stunt he pulled with Elena?" Caroline questioned a brow raised.

I nearly choked on my hot chocolate at the utter disdain that not only crossed her features but the venom that was laced with every word she uttered. The night I had decided to end things with Damon, I had called Caroline a crying mess and like a true friend, she had offered to come over and beat his ass if needed. "We made up." I said shrugging my shoulder nonchalantly as if that night hadn't hurt me. It still stung, one week later and I still trying to get over it.

Nodding she reached for her tea before speaking. "It must have been one hell of a make up because I've barley seen you and when I do your wearing a scarf to cover your neck." She pointed out a grin tugging on her lips.

I looked down at my ensemble. Today I chose to wear an oversized grey sweater that hung off my shoulder, a grey and black newsboy cap, pink scarf and light blue skinny jeans with black booties. It didn't scream. Hey I've spent a week in bed with my vampire boyfriend. Or at least I hoped it didn't.

A grin tugged at the corner of my lips. Damon and I had spent the week making up and I had never felt closer to him. We had lye in the bed late at night talking and early in the morning instead of rushing to leave the house we'd lye in bed content being near each other. "I don't know what your talking about." I lied feeling the blush creep to my cheeks.

"Sure you don't, is that why you look like you've been thoroughly screwed."

"Caroline" I chastised shocked that she would even bring up the sex. It was bad enough Stefan could not only hear everything but he could smell everything as well.

Winking she spoke. "I'm just saying." Leaning forward, she reached for my hand. " B, Im really glad that you're happy, I just want you to be careful Damon is dangerous" she said meeting my eyes. "And now he has your heart."

I squeezed her hand as a faint smile formed on my lips. "You can't help who you love Caroline, and I love him." I admitted honestly. " I know he's not perfect but the last week it's been a dream, he's been patient and caring and I know you never get to see the softer side of him- but it's beautiful...he's beautiful." I whispered tearing my eyes away from my friend.

Sitting back in the chair, she spoke. "Have you thought about what is going to happen when Elena comes back from her vacation?" she asked causing me to gasp. Elena was the elephant in the room, she had gone on her vacation with Ric and Jeremy and though I missed her- my relationship with Damon had gotten better with her absence and that made me feel like a horrible friend.

I didn't have a chance to answer her question, Stefan had soon shown up with his perfect time and it made me love my bff even more. He was right on time to save me from the impending doom this conversation was headed. I didn't know what would happen once Elena came home, and truthfully I didn't want to think about it either. I just wanted to stay in my happy bubble and be happy for once.

**DS-DS**

**Damon**

_cause you made me happy baby love is crazy_

He felt like a caged animal that was itching to break free. His body felt like it had been electrified, and he was itching to touch her butterscotch skin. They had spent nearly a week coped up in his bedroom in a self induced haze that had consisted of much skin to skin contact as possible. God he couldn't get enough of her- the way her green eyes lit up with specks of yellow when she was close, the way she smelled...hmm gardenias. Whenever he smelled the delicious scent, he thought of her. And most of all the way she looked at him like he was the best and worst thing that could ever happen to her.

It had only been a couple of hours and he was already missing her. Being coped up for one week had him love drunk and he wanted more, he needed more. Everything seemed much more intense since they had been sharing blood, this morning was his last hit of her body...and her blood and he felt like he was going insane. All he could hear were her moans of breathy moans of pleasure, all he could see was her butterscotch coated skin and all he wanted was her. Today was his birthday and he was going to rip her from blondie and teach her a lesson about leaving him, she'd never leave his side again and he'd remind her why they stayed locked in his bedroom for so long.

It had been a long time since he felt like this..in fact he felt the feeling had been so foreign to him that it scared him. Happiness was something that he had always wanted but he had never been able to achieve. And for the first time it appeared that he was happy. Elena was safe with Ric and the bad guys had apparently taken a much needed vacation. And then there was Bonnie, she was a big part of the reason he had been in such a good mood. The thought of her made a distant feeling come over him something like fluttering in the stomach and it made him want her even more to capture that moment and hold onto it.

Grabbing his leather jacket he headed for the door swinging the door open with such force he thought it might break, the pull to be near her was too strong, he wanted to touch her skin to feel her moving beneath him...around him..on top of him. He just wanted her close. Swinging open the door he stopped dead in his tracks at the girl standing in front of him. Elena gilbert had recently gone on a vacation with her vamp fighting father figure and waste of space, brother and now she was standing before him with big brown eyes and a smile that had radiated so much light that it had him forgetting the reason for leaving the manor in the first place.

"Surprised?" she asked while throwing her arms around him in a hug.

"Very" he says enjoying the way she feels against his skin. It had been too long since he'd seen her and if it were possible she had gotten even more beautiful in her week vacation. He knew he was being a traitor and for the first time understood what Katherine the bitch felt because one look at Elena and it was like he was back to being the same love sick fool that had chased her for so long.

"Happy Birthday" she exclaims removing her arms from around him. "I bought you a good luck plant!" she boosts a toothy grin on her face.

For a moment he is silent as he watches her movements he's never seen Elena Gilbert so carefree. He had never seen Elena so happy, so full of life well except when she was with Stefan and even then she had her gloomy days. He blamed it on Mystic falls and the fact that when Elena was involved you wither wanted to kill her or in his case screw her.

Clearing his throat he took the tiny plant out of her hands and set it down. "Just what I need a plant." He says pretending as if her gift was not precious. He'd take care of that damn plant for the rest of his undead life.

"Stop it" she says rolling her eyes. "We all need a little good luck and you my friend need a lot." She said walking further into the house, noticing that Stefan was nowhere to be found. Turning around she faced him. "Besides it's the thought that counts right?" she asked grinning again.

His undead heart warmed at the mention of thinking of him and that had him giddy as a school boy. "How about we make a toast to me?" he suggested while grabbing a bottle of whisky and filling two glasses one for him the other for her.

She debated for a moment. "Fine, one drink." She said taking the glass from his outstretched hand. "Happy Birthday Damon, may all your dreams come true."

He smirked and with a clink of glass his birthday celebration started.

It was electric the moment they crossed paths

actively attracted but attempt to walk past

Twenty minutes they are all over each other...the alcohol giving them wings when they never needed to fly. He's unsure who started it but he knows that it'll be finished tonight.

The moment he felt her warm lips touch his- he knew that he was a goner. Here was a newly single Elena Gilbert in front of him with big brown eyes begging to be saved from whatever was plaguing her. She was lost that much he could tell and he wanted to help her find her way. Whatever she needed he would willingly give and for the first time it seemed that what she needed was him. Elena Gilbert had finally needed...wanted him.

_Bang, Bang,_

_Kiss, Kiss_

_You & I got to put_

_end to this_

He had never felt more clumsy as he walked her back to his bed. Every movement every touch caused him to melt under her touch as he basked in the glory of having her in his arms. Elena was everything he had ever wanted, loyal, smart and beautiful and she was offering herself up to him as the perfect present. Even the strongest man wouldn't be able to resist. So he kissed her hard, he kissed her with everything he had and she had given it back full force. She wanted this, she wanted him and he wanted her. Finally he was going to get the girl.

_Stop, breathe, count to 3_

_is she worth it_

Words are not spoken and he's sure it's because break the enchanted spell that has the two of them itching for skin to skin contact. It was always a possibility the two of them, he was in love with her and she was attracted to him, they were meant to do this- meant to give it a try. So he ignores the smell of gardenias the run through his senses. He ignores the thought of a broken hearted girl and he ignores feeling as if he is the scum of the earth.

**BB-DS-SS-EG-**

After a quick change into something that was more suitable for a birthday party Stefan and I soon arrive back to the Salvatore mansion. It had been a long time since anyone within our immediate group of friends had been given a reason to really celebrate and I wanted to celebrate with two of the most important people in the world to me. Together we were celebrating Damons birthday and the mere fact that the guys were finally healing old wounds. It seemed that once Elena was out of the picture the guys were trying harder to brothers because their was nothing left to fight over.

"Do you think he'll like it?" I asked gesturing to the balloons and such. "I mean I did promise something different this year," I rattled on out of nervousness, only to stop once I noticed Stefan was grinning my way.

"Relax Bons" Stefan says immediately calming me down. "He'll love it because this is all from you...You're more important to him, then even you know." He said giving her a reassuring smile.

My teeth gnaw at my bottom lip because if one thing is true, it's that I've fallen for Damon Salvatore and I wanted him to know how much I loved him, without saying the words. "I hope so" pause. "I love him" I say, giving Stefan a small smile. "And I almost told him this morning, but I chickened out." I say finally meeting his eyes.

I let out a shaky breath my nerves were shot and I had come to conclusion that they were shot because I had finally admitted to someone beside myself that I loved Damon. And Stefan was the perfect person to tell all my secrets to because he understood me, more then anyone...sometimes more then Damon. And that was why the three of us were such a good team.

Soon Stefan has his arm wrapped around me affectionately. "My brother is very lucky to have you Bons, you've saved him from his inner demons and you love him with all your heart." He said pausing. "You're everything he's ever wanted." He smiles.

I grin back at Stefan nudging our foreheads together. "Thanks Stefan." I say, tugging him inside.

The first thing we hear is the sound of shattering glass-which was not unusual seeming that Damon had an avidity of breaking glass whenever the mood suited him. I tossed a look in the direction of Stefan who rolled his eyes in reply. Approaching the sitting room yet another sound of shattering glass nearly startled me, followed by a loud thump and finally a drawn out moan. A moan belonging to a woman.

Stefan was suddenly breezing in front of me as if to halt my movements. Everything seemed so loud. I could hear everything. The sound of heavy breathing and loud breathy moans filled my ears, causing my hands to shake. In an instant our eyes lock both knowing good and well what's going on behind closed doors. Stefan pleads with me silently before using his mouth to do so.

"Bonnie," Stefan pleads knowing that the moment she opens the door her heart will be shattered as well. Bonnie had been the best thing to happen to Damon and in true Damon like fashion he had a feeling his brother would destroy everything without even meaning to. He knew his brother well enough to know that Damon was waiting for the bottom to fall out from underneath him. And sometimes it was easier to give up and give into temptation and Damon had been tempted.

"Maybe we're wrong?" I say the words tasting bitter "Maybe he's in trouble and he needs us," I further lament. Fear crept up inside of me because I had a feeling this was the end. "Either way, I need to know the truth." I say suddenly breaking free of his strong hold.

Pushing open the door I revealed two people. Two people who were engrossed in each other as they shared a deep kiss, two people one being Damon and the other being Elena.

"Bonnie!" Elena gasps catching sight of her friend in the midst of her obvious betrayal with Damon."This isn't what it looks like" she exclaims taking a step back from a very shirtless Damon.

I narrowed my eyes her way feeling the heat radiate off me. " So you're telling me you weren't about to have sex with my boyfriend? I asked sarcastically. "Or did you already do it?" I asked chancing a look over In the direction of Damon who wouldn't look my way.

Turning around I notice the look that crosses the face of my best friend, he looks like someone has driven a stake through his heart. And suddenly im crying because in the back of my mind I knew this would one day happen but I never imagined I would take my bestfriend down with me. Together the two of us hug as if we are hanging on for dear life. Stefan looks as pained and betrayed as I feel and I can only imagine the way I look in this very moment. Blindly I reach for as pain literally rips through my body. I've never had a broken heart before and it feels like someone had snatched my heart out of my chest.

"Bonnie...Bonnie I can explain." Elena says her big brown eyes filled with tears. We were drunk, celebrating his birthday and one thing led to another." She cried while buttoning her shirt. "I never meant to hurt you...you're my sister" she cried before looking over to Stefan. "Stefan, you believe you know I would never hurt you guys. I love you two- you're the most important thing to me."

I licked my dry lips. 'Did you sleep with him?" I asked quietly.

She let out a gasp before speaking. "No...no we didn't. We would never do that to you."

I blinked back a few tears before speaking in a low whisper. "I don't believe you. 'I admitted, feeling sick to my stomach. One of the hardest things was knowing that I couldn't trust someone that I had viewed as a sister. Elena may not have wanted to admit it but she was just like Katherine, she wanted both Damon and Stefan and she would probably have both. She gravitated toward both Salvatore brothers and I would no longer pretend that it was okay because this was my sister.

"We got carried away...that it. Bonnie, if I could take it back, I would." She declared while taking steps closer to me.

"You can't!' I screamed back at her. "He meant everything to me..." I declared sadly. I wanted to say more but I feared that I would fall apart and I didn't want to do that, especially in front of Damon or Elena, neither deserved a damn thing from me nor Stefan.

The sound of clapping caused me to stop my emotional rant. I wasn't in the mood to deal with bad guys attempting to kill us right now because if someone was going to hurt it was going to be anyone who dared to mess with me at this point in time.

"Oh, don't stop on my account" Katherine cooed whilst putting an arm around Stefan and grinning over at me.

"Katherine" Stefan sighed unable to hide his content for the female vamp.

'Stefan." Katherine grinned twirling a lock of her curly hair "Bonnie!" she winked my way.

The sound of an annoyed gasp caused me to turn my attention to my ex friend who had the nerve to let out a smart remark. "Last time I checked you were no longer welcomed in this house." Elena said causing me to give her a dirty look whilst Katherine laughed in her face.

Whirling around I faced my former friend and smirked firmly planted on my lips. "Wow! One time and you're already staking claim of the house." I sneered causing her brown eyes to go wide. "What's the matter Elena?" I asked walking closer to her. "Afraid you were just the girl with her face?" I asked smirking in her face as she all but runs back to the side of her dark knight.

He had been silent for so long. It was due to the look of pure hurt that had been on her face. He had seen her hurt so many times, but this was something else. 'That's enough!" he yelled causing everyone to stare forward. Stefan had approached Bonnie yet again and began to rub circles along her back and he couldn't help but let out a growl at the sight. He had no right to be jealous but seeing the way Bonnie had quickly began to relax under the touch of his brother had caused his body to run hot with jealousy "You're mad at me, leave Elena alone" he says his voice coming out harsher then he expected because her vibrant green eyes had turned a shade darker.

"Look at you coming to her rescue like a perfect boyfriend." I said walking over to him. "You two are perfect for each other, you can whine about never being loved and she can whine about being loved too much. "I said biting my lip.

Realizing this was his chance to stop this epic train wreck he spoke up. "Elena is telling the truth- all we did was kiss." he said.

I let out a scuff and crossed my arms in front of my chest defensively. "Why would I ever believe you?" I asked squaring my shoulders as I turned to face him.

He walked over to the bar needing something to calm his suddenly jittery nerves. Bonnie had fire in her eyes and he knew one wrong move could send her over the edge and with Katherine fanning the fire. 'Because it's the truth."

_I didnt want it this way_

_I only wanted to say_

_I loved you right_

I wanted to point out that they were both losing clothes that Elena's perfectly straight hair was a mess probably from him running his hands through it but that didn't matter, if it did happen or didn't happen was no longer a factor. What was done wether that be a kiss or more was done and so was I.

I bit my lip again and shifted my weight from one foot to the other. 'But you thought about it right?" I asked knowing the answer already. I just wanted to hear it from him. "If Stefan and I hadn't walked in would you have taken her to bed?' I asked causing him shift his blue eyes my way.

I watched as he placed both of his palms on the bar before turning my way. "Bon..."He let out a sigh and looked down. The look on her face sent chills down his spine. He knew that look it was the same look he had given Katherine when she had broken his heart. Now he had done so to someone who had given him everything. He could practically hear the sound of her broken heart falling to the ground and he couldn't do anything to help her because he was the one that broke it in the first place. "We got carried away...that's it." He stammered out feeling the heat of her stare.

"Ok" I said letting out a huff of air. "Answer this one question and I'll end the interrogation." I voiced causing his blue eyes to meet mine. "If Stefan and I hadn't walked in here, would you have had sex with her?" I asked raising my eyebrow up at him. This was his chance to be honest with me because he had lied for so long.

"Say it" I nearly screamed his way. "Tell me" I screamed again this time marching over to him and slapping his precious whisky bottle to the floor. My anger exploded as yet another bottle of whisky had exploded shattering to the floor. I looked down at my bleeding hand and closed my eyes willing myself to heal the wound.

He sucked his teeth before speaking. "I don't know!" he yelled back resisting the urge to come clean because if he did he'd lose her and he couldn't lose her

"Yes you do." I say quietly. "And so does everyone else. So why don't you just admit it so we all know where you stand Damon!" I raged again.

_Feel the fire cause_

_its all around_

_burning up forever and always_

Although he knew, everyone could hear his words including his ex girlfriend Katherine who only loved his brother Stefan, which happened to be his current girlfriends bestfriend and Elena the girl who was caught between it all- he still needed to get closer to Bonnie.

"Don't do this Bonnie. Not here, not now." He pleaded, gaining a stony look in his direction. "I could lie to you and say that I would turn Elena away but the truth is- I couldn't, not even for you." He admitted feeling worst then the scum of the earth. He had done some shitty things over the years but nothing like this. He couldn't turn Elena away because if he did then he'd continue to hurt Bonnie, he had to at least kiss Elena to know if what he was feeling was real or if it was all in his head. He wanted to feel it, the way he felt it when he had first kissed Bonnie. That way he'd know the truth.

His words hit me harder then I expected. Although I knew, the answer all along hearing them hurts...so much more. And I find myself in the arms of my bestfriend. "Take me home Stefan...please take me home." I cry, as sobs threaten to escape my mouth.

_You shot the bullet_

_you shot the bullet that killed me_

_not feeling my heart beat and now its dyin_g

Suddenly I find myself ripped from his clutches and starring down at a teeth baring Damon. Before I can react, Stefan is in front of me shielding me from her venom. His back is rigid as he squares off with his constant companion...his brother.

"You're not going anywhere with her. "Damon growls causing me to lock eyes with his. How dare he act as if we have something to talk about. He had made his choice and now I wanted nothing to do with him.

"Touch her and I'll kill you" Stefan seethes causing me to touch his shoulder. I had never heard Stefan speak so deadly in the time that I've known him and for a moment I'm afraid of what he will do next. His eyes are wide as they dart between Elena, and Damon as if he is begging for one of them to make one wrong move so that he could ease my pain...his pain...our pain.

Katherine cackles throwing an amused look at Damon before speaking."Someone has competition on the protection of the Bennett witch."

I watch as the two of them fight which has probably been a long time coming but I refuse to let this happen in front of him. As much as I would love to see Stefan tear Damon to pieces, I knew that the two of them fighting would hurt them in the end and I didn't want that. With a blink of an eye I cause an ear pitching scream to erupt causing the two vampires to stop fighting. I watch as Elena rushes to check on Damon while Stefan is now as my side and I erupt.

Soon I felt my skin heat up as my blood literally boiled, I felt pain as if someone had hit me with all the force in the world and the only thing I wanted to do, was share that pain with the person who had caused it. Without much of a warning I let out everything that was boiling up inside of me loose. I focused all of my energy his way, channeling all of the power that was bestowed onto me, in sharing the pain that Damon had brought not just to me but to all of his victims. I watched as he fell to the floor clawing at his chest as if that would stop the pain.

Damon screamed as he held onto his head. "BONNIE, BONS" he grunted out in pain as tears fell from his eyes. I could see the pain in his eyes and it was then that he knew what I had felt upon finding him, with her. Our eyes met and I soon began to cry. It wasn't supposed to be like this, never did I think it would hurt like this. With all my might I concentrated on the person that was giving me the most pain before I felt the cool hand of my bestfriend. Stefan had wrapped his arm around me spinning me around to face him. As his hands came to cup my face I felt tears running down .

"Bonnie, you have to stop you'll kill him." Stefan calls shaking me out of my staring contest with Damon, as he wiped my tears. "Bons, he's not worth it." Stefan says and in that moment it all clicks together. Damon didn't just hurt me. He hurt his brother to and all in the name of love. Damon didn't love me and he sure as hell didn't love Stefan, in fact I was sure he only loved himself. Once Stefan words finally registered in my head I quickly turned to face him as he hugged me. Pulling away from him I made it to the door just as blue eyes bore into me.

"Please just-just forget about everyone else and focus on me, listen to me" he pleads, blue eyes wide as saucers. His voice shakes as do his hands as he tried to hold me in place, fear evident on his face. "You never gave me a chance to finish." He pleads

_cause the wall burnt up_

_and our love fell down_

I shook my head. "I don't want to hear your explanations. It's obvious what happened. You couldn't fight it any longer!" I yelled. "Katharine and Elena will always be between us no matter what I do I will never be enough for you." I said yanking myself out of his grasp. I wouldn't use magic to hurt him because I wanted my words to last longer. 'This isn't your fault Damon, its mine..." I said pausing. "I knew who you were... it was my mistake thinking you could have been anything more then a pussy whipped, bastard." I said causing his blue eyes to bleed black.

_Burning up forever and always_

And then he grabs me and before I can even think of a spell to render him a whimpering mess he's taken me away from Elena, Stefan, and Katherine and we're left alone.

Song credit: I in Lie by Patrick stump and Disaster by Jojo


	3. Chapter 3

A.N. Hey all! I hope you all had a good weekend! Thanks to everyone who read and replied! Your feedback keep me going. This is an angst filled chapter, but the good news is that next chapter kicks off the rest of the story and juicy goodness is ahead. Enjoy

xoxo

queena

"Maybe I'm too old to be so hopeful, maybe I'm too young to be so bitter" Patrick Stump

**Chapter 3: Let it rain**

_Listen to the sound of the first time_

_my heart is breaking_

As fate would have it, maybe it was just my rotten luck, Damon had whisked the two of off us to a nearby cabin, our cabin...our safe-house. This was the place we went to when the world was crashing down on us. We had only been here for all of two minutes and I already felt emotionally drained. This place had been our place, when we had started this train wreck of a relationship maybe even before when we were in denial this had been the place we had gone to. Back then we were slightly ashamed that we enjoyed sexing each other, so we'd meet here for secret rendevous and it made sneaking around much better because we had a place to go. Of course as our relationship progressed from purely physical to something akin to love, at least on my part- this place had been our refuge from the outside world.

_Stars collide_

_you feel the quake_

_of the first time_

My eyes scanned the place and it looked exactly the same way we had left it. We had come up here months ago for a much needed vacation. Back then things were semi normal, Katherine was still on the loose and looking for trouble and we were still fighting for our lives on the daily but it seemed like even the bad guys needed a holiday from all the fighting. I had been stressed more then usually and Damon had insisted that the two of us take a drive and we ended up at the safe-house and just like that my mood had been lifted.

_Flashback_

_It had been a long time since Damon and I were able to get away from Mystic Falls and all the problems that came with living in a town which was the focal point for everything supernatural. So it was nice that Damon had went through the trouble of making sure we had some time to relax._

_We had spent the day on the lake enjoying the sounds of nature and after everything was said and done we found ourselves lying in bed after a nice hot bath, in which big bad Damon Salvatore had even washed my hair. The two of us had sipped champagne in the tub together and practiced giving one another massages._

_Now was the perfect time for a getaway, It seemed like we were always too busy to enjoy ourselves. Either we were fighting new enemies, fighting each other or fighting for each other. Hence the reason why I was so glad that he had surprised me with this trip; it gave us a chance to reconnect instead of always focusing on battle plans._

_"You think if I told anyone you washed my hair they'd believe me?" I asked my head resting on his chest._

_"Don't you dare?" he said placing a kiss to my hand while I snuggled closer to him. He ran his fingers through my hair causing me to purr like cat and arch my back. Sometimes I loved just lying with him in the silence because it was peaceful and serene like and that was hard to achieve for the two of us._

_"If you could change anything about us, would you?" I asked resting my head back on his chest._

_Grinning he ran his cold hand against her butterscotch coated skin. "Well if I knew your appetite, I would have seduced you a hell of a lot earlier- maybe even during your time with the dog." He said winking before a lazy smile spread across his lips._

_I smacked his chest causing him to swiftly flip the two of us over a seductive grin spread across his features and I briefly shut my eyes as I felt him._

_"What would you change?" He asked wrapping his arm around my waist._

_I pretended to think for a moment before speaking. "I wouldn't change a thing." I admitted honestly._

_"Yeah right" he said releasing me. "You'd turn me into a carbon copy of my brother. Someone who snacks on the forest animals, someone who at your beck and call and most importantly someone who doesn't fight unless provoked."_

_I bit my lip in hesitation as the seconds ticked till he mentally exploded. "Although you make valid points, I wouldn't change a thing about us because you wouldn't be Damon and I wouldn't be Bonnie" I admitted leaning forward and placing a chaste kiss to his lips_

_"You mean that? He asked surprised. He had been positive that she would take back all the fights, the times they had tried to kill each other and everything in between._

_"Yeah."_

_"I guess that means you no longer see me as a monster."_

_I stroked his face tenderly. "I haven't seen you as a monster in a very long time." I admitted noticing the way his eyes lit up at my naked admission._

_"And why is that" he asked reaching to bring her closer. "Is it my killer good looks or my bedside manner?"_

_"Both." I say nuzzling my nose. "The truth is you let me in and I got a chance to see the man behind that bad ass persona and that man is beautiful."_

_" Stop it, your making me blush!"he said pulling her down on top of him so that she was resting over his body._

_"I'm serious, you're not all sunshine and butterflies but you're the man I want to be with." I say into his chest._

_"For what its worth, I like being with you too and right here with you in this moment is where should be." He said running his hand down her back the smell of gardenias filling the room._

_end of flashback_

_my heart is breaking_

_for the very first time_

_and it's all in vain_

The sound of harsh rain had brought me out of my revere and instantly I hated being here. There was no point in going back down memory lane, I was they're through the good and the bad and now I just wanted to be free. I wanted to be free of Damon and I wanted my heart to be set free from a man that not only would never love me, but who never deserved me.

"What are we doing here?" I asked my eyes shifting in his direction, my voice accusing and my mind downright tired because I was positive that this action was meant to mind fuck me and it had worked.

_If you ever leave me baby_

_leave some morphine_

_at my door_

He folded his arms in front of his chest for beat before speaking. "I thought this would be a great place to heal." He admitted watching as she fidgeted with a nearby throw before casting her eyes in the direction of now dancing fire. He had expected her to say something but instead the silence had stretched on and for once in a very long time, he didn't mind the silence and chose to gaze out the window.

He messed up, he messed up very badly and he had planned on fixing it here. Bonnie would forgive him and they'd pretend this whole thing never happened.

The sound of heavy rainfall echoed throughout the cabin and I blamed my stormy emotions on the weather. Rain was fitting for break up and the distance between us in the sitting room was nowhere the distance between us in my heart. I had never thought that one day I might give up on someone, especially someone I loved but tonight I was giving up on Damon and everything I had hoped we could be. I had always known that Damon and I were not the forever and always type of people..or maybe I wasn't the forever and always type of girl. Today I would leave, and I would get off this train from hell once and for all.

_Cause it would take_

_a whole lot of medication_

"You're quiet." He says after a long moment of silence. He had waited for her to yell to scream, to threaten to set his ass on fire but she did nothing. Except for the outburst earlier she was the perfect picture of perfection and that worried him. He could smell the anger brewing under the surface of her enchanting veins and waited patiently for her to erupt, only to find that the green eyed beauty still silent as ever.

_To realize what we used to have_

_we don't have anymore_

For his part, he didn't know why he did it. Maybe it was because he wanted Elena, maybe it was because he wanted Katherine...or maybe it was because he knew that down the line he would fuck things up so why not do it now. For as long as he could remember he had always wanted what he couldn't have and Elena resembled what he could never have with Katherine the only difference was that he could have everything he ever wanted with Elena in time. And Bonnie, she was the girl that made him want to stray from everything he had ever known was love.

"Really what can I say, I already tried to kill you so..." I trailed off before looking back at the fire. I watched the flames dance in the fireplace as Damon stood by the window. Damon had finally made his decision and for once I was going to stick with my decision as well. It was probably time for the two of us to stop hiding behind everything anyway. We shouldn't have last this long and the fact that we had spoke volumes but it wasn't enough to save us nothing could save us...not now and probably not ever.

The corner of his lip twitched into a sad smile as he watched the girl in front of him. Even now when her heart was broken, she still looked enchanting to him, still as beautiful and vibrant underneath it all.

"You know that I never expected you and me to happen." He says looking over at her fondly. She had become important to him and he cared about her safety and her happiness and that had never been in his plan. "You were never part of my initial diabolical plan but you were hard to ignore with your utter disdain for me." He said as a ghost of a smile reached his lips. " We hated each other and I thought for sure we'd make a night of it and get it out of systems and go back to our lives hating each other." He said pausing. His mind drifted back to that first night, she had been broken and he had known what that felt like. They had found solace in each others bodies and the effect had resulted in a lot of unwanted and later hidden feelings they had discovered together.

"Sometimes I wish we did." I stammered nearly choking on the words. I had thought about that first night many times. Every time I had cried myself to sleep because Damon had disappointed me, every time he had chosen Elena over me I had cursed that night and every night following it. I had especially cursed that night I had realized that I loved him because loving him was what was killing me. Damon Salvatore was toxic to everyone he touched and now he had inflicted me with his poison.

From the corner of my eye I watched as he dug his fingers into the nearby chair as if my words had hurt him. I couldn't be bothered with Damon and his feelings because he had never bothered with mine. Damon had finally made a choice. He wanted Katharine or Elena- hell either or possibly both. The truth, was that Damon didn't want me and if I were honest with myself I didn't want him either. I wanted someone who could love me and put me first and Damon would never be that kind of man. There wasn't any room in his life nor his heart for me because he had two girls who were taking over his being.

"You don't mean that." He said as his eyes squinted in her direction, as he tried to read her emotions. "You can't mean that." He stressed out once again as something inside of him started to crack at her words. He was positive only two women in his lifetime had regretted being with him, Katherine because in the end she lost Stefan and now Bonnie.

I nodded my head telling him, it was true. "I take it back." I said causing him to turn his attention back to me. "If I could change anything about the two of us, I would." I admitted remembering the last time I had said those words to him, only last time I had told him I wouldn't change a thing about us. Now months later I had changed my mind. "I would change the first night. I would change the day you told me you cared about me and I realized you weren't lying, and most importantly I would change..."

He soon meshed our forehands together and I closed my eyes at the intimacy. "Bons" he breathed as his breath kissed my cheeks."I know I'm not perfect that we aren't perfect but we what we have is something I've never felt before...it why I've been holding onto you." He stammered out. This was as close as he would probably get to telling her he loved her because he wasn't sure if what he felt for her was love, but whatever he felt it was strong, it made him regret some of his actions and that had to mean something.

I shook my head unwilling to look at him. "Forget it. We've already been down this road. You do things that will hurt me and in turn I try to hurt you but nothing hurts you Damon, nothing!" I yelled my lip quivering as I tried not to cry for him again. "The difference is that this time you made your choice and I've made mine." I say finding it hard to breathe. I feel like im suffocating in this damn cabin and with a flick of the wrist I flung open the windows.

I quickly shut my eyes, being here was too much for me. I could hear it, I could see it and it made me want to scream because it hurt- being here hurt.

"Seeing you like this...it hurts me Bons" he whispers against my neck. I can feel his cool lips slipping down my neck as he pushes me further into the wall. My body melts under his touch and the feeling of his cool hand sliding up my pleated dress jerks me back into reality.

Whirling around I nearly want to rip his head off but I refrain from doing so. "The only thing that could possibly hurt you is if you caught me and Stefan going at it." I crowed not missing the way his eyes began to blaze. "Tell me Damon how would you feel if I evened the score with your brother?" I asked as the bitter side of me came to the surface.

It was only fair he had done everything in his power to break me, and in the end he did. He chose someone I had viewed as family over me and it probably wouldn't have hurt as much if he had just let me go, because I wasn't stupid I knew it would happen one day- but to do it this way. It showed me how heartless he could be and how self absorbed Elena was.

"Huh" I asked walking closer to him as he walked further away from me. "Then you'd stand by your window and drink yourself into a stupor but then you'd know how I felt- you'd feel it like tiny blades cutting at your skin leaving marks never to be seen but always felt." I ground out stopping once I was in his face.

He darted his eyes around her face searching."You don't want Stefan." He said ignoring the way anger and jealousy threatened to take over at her admission. In the back of his mind he had always waited for the day that _his Bonnie _fell for his brother. It had always happened and maybe just maybe he decided to wreck everything with her in order to protect himself from her hurting him.

I let a vengeful smile grace my lips. "I did, before I knew who he was. I was with Tyler and the first time I saw him..."

Before I had a chance to finish my sentence he had slammed me against the wall. "Shut your fucking mouth." He screamed in my face as his fingers dug into my skin.

"Did I hurt you Damon?" I asked almost playfully. "Do you want to hurt something, rip something?" I asked reaching for his hand and placing it on my heart. "Why don't you just go ahead and rip my heart out?" I said causing him to take a step back. "Oh wait. You already did." I reminded him pressed up against him.

He let out a tired breath. "I..I made a mistake." he admitted honestly. Looking back he knew that it was a mistake to kiss Elena, to let Elena kiss him, because they were going to be the downfall of the people the cared about the most. And although they didn't have sex, they could have and if her were honest, in the moment he knew they would have.

"You damn right you made a mistake and her name was Elena." I lashed out striking him with venom. "Maybe Stefan and I can make our own mistake, in fact we can record our mistake and send it to you so you can watch or maybe we'll just make our own mistake after much drinking of course." I added offhandedly. " Or in your bed, beneath your sheets." I whispered causing him to glare my way.

"Shut up." He yelled again. The thought of Bonnie and Stefan getting as far as he and Elena had gotten..possibly further had his skin crawling

"Make me" I yelled his way and he kissed me. The kiss was all teeth and tongue, with rage, hurt and jealous combined.

For the briefest minute I allowed him to do so before I gave him an aneurysm. When he fell to the ground I looked at him in disgust. "You disgust me, you can't even own up to what you did to us...to your brother!" I admitted appalled by his actions. 'The only thing you can do is play the blame game, try to remind me how good we were together and more importantly seduce your way out of this." I exclaimed feeling my anger flood my entire body. "You're the same monster I warned everyone to stay away from." I said not missing the look of hurt that crossed his features. His blue eyes shone with something akin to pain.

"What do you want from me?" he raged his eyes bleeding black as he kicked over a nearby table.

I flinched at the movement of the table along with the contents that contained assorted glasses flying across the room shattering into pieces against the wall. "I wanted you!" I wailed facing him. I could feel the anger and heat rolling across my body like rolling thunder. My words hung in the air as I tried to keep my emotions in check. The chandelier above us was beginning to rattle above us just as the bottle of assorted alcoholic drinks were beginning to dance about causing the liquid to move back and forth.

_Cause there'll be no sunlight_

_if I lose you baby_

"You had me, as much of me as I could give you." He said the words sounding rigid. He didn't like talking like this, because with each word they spoke she was getting farther away from him. Maybe he had loved both Bonnie and Elena differently.

I let out a sarcastic laugh and crossed my arms in front of my chest. " No I never had you- you never gave us a chance." I said pausing as he looked my way. "I wanted to be here...I wanted us..." I threw out causing him to turn my way and cock his head to the side as if he were processing the words. " I just wanted you." I whispered out.

"Why" he asked not daring to move toward her. Instead he watched as she hugged her arms around herself and fought the urge to console her, or at least attempt to. In the past if a girl had been hurt by him, he would ignore the hurt in their eyes and easily compel them to forget if they were a good lay but he couldn't do that with Bonnie. And what was more frightening was the fact that he couldn't bare to see the pain in her eyes. The pain he had caused her. For so long he had shut off his emotions had shut off feeling pain but seeing Bonnie so broken and knowing that he had done it to her- it was killing him and slowly chipping away the wall of armor he had built around his emotions.

_If you walk away_

_everyday it'll rain_

_rain, rain_

Taking a deep breath, I spoke. "I wish I knew" I said sliding down against the wall and sitting in the corner. "I always knew who you were, I knew what you were capable of and I thought you'd never treat me the way I watched you treat other girls," I said pausing to look over at him. He stood by the window the sharp angels of his face were outlined by the moonlight and he was beautiful, a beautiful disaster. "But I was wrong, because what you did to the other girls, they were lucky to forget."

_Your drifting away from me_

_for the first time_

With his back turned he spoke so quietly that I had to strain my ears to hear him. "I didn't plan this Bonnie. " He admitted, regret tainting every word. He couldn't bare to look over at her she had lost so much hope and all in a matter of hours. He could remember how happy she was this morning...how happy he had been this morning and now it was all shot to hell.

"It doesn't matter anymore." I said my words coming out choppy as I sucked in a breath full of pain. "This moment was inevitable. Just like you and Elena are inevitable. You two are like magnets, and we all know its going to happen...the two of you and its gonna wreck everyone in the process" I admitted as I fingered a picture of me, Damon, Stefan and Elena. We were all going to be broken by the outcome of this breakup. Elena she cared about Damon and it was only a matter of time before the two of them figured out where they stood, leaving Stefan and I to pick up the pieces of our broken hearts.

He nodded his head finally realizing how fucked up the whole situation had gotten. He had finally pushed her too far and she was begging for a reason to leave him, just like everyone else. But unlike Katherine who never gave a damn- he had given Bonnie a reason to leave and never look back. Unlike Stefan who would probably forgive him in a couple days, and Elena who never stayed mad at him for too long- Bonnie was the one person who would leave him for good.

"Bonnie, what do you want from me?" he asked again this time his voice was heavy with emotion.

"I want you to tell me why?" I said my voice cracking. "I deserve that much."

He nodded before walking over to the bar and fixing two glasses of whisky. He figured she'd need one after he told her what she wanted to hear. Swaggering over to her, He offered her a glass and surprisingly she had taken it without any dispute. His fingers lingered against her knuckles for a few moments before he made his way to the opposite side of the room. "You act like I've been plotting and scheming to do this for a long time." He said casting a look in her direction.

"Haven't you? From the beginning you wanted Elena and you settled for me and you saw your chance and you took it without any regards to me or your brother."

He shook his head denying her allocation. It was only half true. "In the beginning yes, but that changed...you changed me."

"I didn't change you. I got you domesticated for Elena." I shot out causing him to run his hands through his hair.

"Do you have any idea how hard this is for me?" he questioned his eyes dark and moody as he glanced my way." It's like everyday I am fighting a losing battle. 'I've been fighting this for so long, I thirst for it, I breathe for it." He stressed widening his eyes for effect. " And I thought that if...if I took my chance then maybe the hunger...the need would subside and we could be together." He admitted softly.

"Well-put Mr. Salvatore, it's like you've been playing this game for ages." I spat out. "You know, all I wanted was for you to...need me as much as I needed you...as much as I wanted you." I burst."I gave you everything! I put up with so much of your shit! I licked your wounds and even when you were bringing me down with your eternal issues I still tried to save you...to save us." I said folding my arms over my chest.

_There'll be no sunshine_

_if you leave me baby_

"I need you Bonnie, I need you more then I ever thought I would." He replied horsily.

I let the tears fall freely. "What you need is to go find Katherine because the two of you are perfect for each other...you both leave destruction and heartbreak in your wake." I growled out while wrapping my arms around myself as the room temperature dropped.

Anger filled his veins as his eyes bled black and suddenly he's pressing into her. The sound of her frantic heartbeat tells him that he's frightened her "Don't you think I know that" he seethed. "I'm just like her...the one person who understands me is the person I hate the most." He says finally loosening his grip on her. Blue met green and looking into her eyes he saw the pain that had hid behind his blue eyes the moment Katherine had admitted never loving him. Within the deep pool of her jade eyes were flashes of him, the haunted hurt look that still ached.

"I believed you." I said reaching my shaky hand out to touch his face. "I trusted you when my gut instinct told me that you'd always hurt me. Because I loved you...I went against everything I believed, I went against my blood line for you because I thought you were worth it- but you weren't." I said as my eyes started to water.

He couldn't let her walk out that door because he knew that if she made it- it would really be over. "What you saw back there with me and Elena..."

"You love her." I cut him off. "You've always loved her and I was just another casualty of your love for Elena ."

Bending down so that he was eye level he spoke. " Listen, I know I hurt you but we can do this Bonnie, together. You're my witch and I'm your vampire." He said hoping to get a grin from her but to no avail. "I'm sorry," he said finally after a few moments of silence.

I had wished to god that his words could have meant something to me but I had heard Damon apologize for so much that his words and promises were empty. I could never fully trust a liar and never forgive a cheater and Damon was both things. "It's not enough." I said backing away from him. When he tried to comfort me, I quickly slapped his face. I didn't want him to touch me ever again.

Licking the blood off of his lips, he grinned her way. "Bons, you know I love it when you play rough." He says smirking at her. Bonnie Bennett was beautiful and even more so when angry. What he wouldn't give to run her up the wall and make her forget what he had done.

The moment he said those words it was like something broke inside of me. Damon had spent his whole life while being a vampire playing with people, for either sexual pleasure or for dinner. And I didn't want to play- not anymore.

"I'm not playing. I'm tired and I don't want to fight anymore-not for you...you're not worth it." I said causing him to stop walking toward me. "I'm done Damon." I finally burst, I'm done being your pawn, your sexual toy, I'm done!" I say defeated as I walk to the door and surprisingly he lets me. Maybe he saw it in my eyes that I was finally giving up on him...on us.

Somberly he speaks. "Don't act like this isn't important that we aren't important." He exclaimed as the words tumbled out of his mouth. "I care about you okay." He knew that he had treated her wrong in the past, played with her emotions on many occasions but seeing her so close to the door seeing the look in her eyes told him that if weren't honest with her and himself that he could lose her and then what. Was he supposed to go back to chasing after Elena who would probably avoid him like the plague since they had been caught in a compromising position.

I was slightly amazed by his lying technique because for a moment I believed his words, but Damon was a professional at everything he did and unless you were Elena he never played games with your heart. "Nobody cares when the tears of clown fall down Damon." I said causing him to briskly walk my way so that he was staring at me in the face.

"I need you to listen to me," he said not daring to touch her skin. If he were going to be honest the touching had to be at an all time low. "I care about you...and I didn't realize how much tell I realized you were going to leave me for good.' he admitted his words soaked with honest emotion.

Inside I was breaking because here he was possibly on the verge of saying what I had wanted to hear from him for so long, but it was too late. We both knew it was too late for us. Wether or not he and Elena slept together wasn't even an issue anymore. I had made up my mind when I found them nearly naked- they looked like they could belong together and the betrayal had been the last straw for me.

I let out a bitter chuckle. "What are you going to tell me you love me now?' I asked staring into his eyes.

His eye twitched. "What if I do love you, what if I just couldn't say the words out loud...or admit that to myself." he asked waiting for her answer. It was always the possibility that he loved her it could have been the reason he stuck around, and he knew it was the reason she had stuck around.

" I don't want you're kind of love...not anymore" I whispered on the brink and turning around when his hand shot out to hold me in place.

"Yes you do." he paused. ""You love me" he called causing her to stand still. " And I've known for a long time...I just" he said stopping once he saw the look on her face. It was a low blow bringing up the fact that she loved him, but he was desperate because without her reflecting some sort of light in his life he knew he would revert back to old habits and that meant know one was safe.

"I wont love you forever." I grit out. "I will forget about you and one day I will get married and have kids and I'll be happy." I say turning around to face him. "And you'll be all alone because you'll burn all the bridges that lead you back home." I say feeling lighter by the minute.

"I'm here" he says suddenly. "I'm fighting for you...isn't that what you wanted? Im fighting for you...for us, I'm ready to fight for us." He nearly screams.

I gave him a broken smile. "It's too late" I said dejectedly. "I can't make you love me, Damon and won't try to I deserve someone who loves me...not someone else." I say tiredly.

"Why, does it have to be so complicated. You want me and I want you that should be enough without the labels and all the other bullshit." He asked perplexed. With any other girl he would have won over but not with Bonnie.

" Because I'm a human being and I am not your toy or your back up girl till Elena decides she wants you." I said touching his ice cold face. "I loved you with all my heart." I said stopping myself short.

"You still love me." He said standing in front of me in my personal space. His eyes were so intense that I almost believed that he did care about me, in his own Damon way."You can't run from your heart Bonnie." He says placing his hands on either side of my face. "You love me...and you'll come back to me because you love me." He says placing a sloppy kiss onto my cheek.

Despite all the hate I felt for him I wanted one last kiss before I let him go forever. Tentatively I took the few steps that separated us and placed a kiss to his lips. I felt tears run down my face and took a step back when it was over. His eyes were shiny and if I didn't know better it looked like he might cry. "Happy birthday Damon." I said letting the tears fall freely. "You finally got what you wanted for so long." I said as my finger rested on his lips to stop him from talking. "Your freedom." I whispered tossing him the necklace that had clung to my neck, it he had given me the necklace that held a diamond the color of his eyes for my birthday in this exact place and I was returning it to him.

And with that I walked away from the man I had tried so badly to save from his inner demons. I had spent so much time trying to fix Damon that I had nearly withered away and that was going to end today. Now it was time for me to get my life back and show the rest of Mystic Falls and myself that I was worthy of someone loving me the way a girl is supposed to be loved.

_If you ever leave me baby_

_leave some morphine_

_at my door_

song credit: rosie munter- the first time, bruno mars- rain

Spoilers- Bonnie gets a surprise, Damon takes a trip, and Mason makes an appearance. plus Mason and Bonnie find themselves on an adventure and Damon comes to a conclusion.


	4. Chapter 4

A.N. Hey all! I hope you are all having a good weekend. I'm back with the next chapter of jagged edges, after a small hiatus, real life was chaotic. Thanks again to everyone who had read, replied, add this to their favorite list or alert list, it means so much to me! I had so much fun writing this chapter so i hope you all like reading it! A bit of caution, this chapter is long, i couldn't find the right place to end it, so just kept going. Enjoy!

xoxo

queena

"Passion can make you fall for what you feel"

**Chapter 4: Rumor Has It**

It was Friday night and instead of moping around because my boyfriend had betrayed me with one of my best friends, I had found myself preparing for a pub crawl with Caroline. I had spent the days following my breakup literally setting fire to everything that was bad in my life, which included almost all of the junk Damon had managed to leave at my house. I had also gathered all of the presents he had given me and rightfully placed it all in a box along with a few pictures that I couldn't bare to part with and one of his oversized black shirts. It was harder then I thought, letting go and setting fire to things...that had meant the world to me only weeks ago, but I had managed to do so because I couldn't be the girl that held onto the past because the past hurt me.

I would be lying if I had said I was completely over Damon, I was hurt, so hurt and what had hurt the most was the mere fact that the one time I put myself out on the limb for someone else and let go of any of my reservation or inhibitions the outcome of that had left me feeling numb. Which was ironic because during the portion of our relationship the one thing that held us together was our motto, don't think just feel. That had been my motto with Damon and if I had taken the time to think about what I was doing, what he was doing...what we were doing, the moment I realized that he had cared for me I would have run for the hills and saved myself from the heartbreak.

_Flashback_

_It hadn't been a good night, we had been attacked by at least a dozen vampires and half a dozen wolves who had wanted revenge on the Salvatore brothers and in the process of fighting I had lost a lot of blood. My head was pounding and the only thing I wanted to do was go to sleep. But I had to help, I couldn't let Stefan down and Damon though he was an ass he didn't deserve to die again._

_"How could you be so stupid?" Damon asked, pacing back and forth as he looked my way. His eyes were doing that thing where they bugged out and if I hadn't been in pain I would have compared him to that cartoon Rango but I didn't really have the patience to do so. The only good thing that came out of this disastrous night was that I had managed to save Stefan and Damon. Yeah Stefan was still healing from all the vervain pumped into his system, but at least he was still alive...well sort of. And Damon, well lets just say over the last century he had pissed off a lot of people it was a miracle he'd managed to stay among the living this long._

_I popped open an eye and looked his way. "Excuse me, I just saved your ass, you'd think you could be more grateful." I said already on my toes. I didn't need this, I did something good and he was lucky because I could have left him to the wolves...in fact I had fantasized about doing so but then I'd no longer get a glimpse of those eyes and I was a sucker for blue eyes. The moment I stood I felt my head ache in pain and soon I felt a breeze brush by me._

_"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he asked his arms already braced around her. She was so damn stubborn and in fact if she hadn't been such a good lay he probably would have let her stubborn ass pass out but then who'd keep him company while Stefan rested._

_I held my head and steadied my body with his support. Opening my eyes green met blue and instead of feeling butterflies swarm my stomach at the close moment we shared I felt like someone hit me in the head with a hammer. Inwardly I winced shutting my eyes again."I am going to check on Stefan." I ground out ignoring the pain in my head._

_"You are the most stubborn witch; I have ever met." He called quickly biting into his wrist. "You've lost a lot of blood and you've probably gotten a concussion." He said while holding her steady._

_I tried to move away from him but he was too strong. "No, I don't want to drink your blood." I protested, only to find my words fell on deaf ears. Vaguely I could hear Damon still talking trash but I was too caught up in the moment. I wasn't sure if it were the concussion or if being near him had my body to buzz. His eyes were so blue, almost crystal clear and they were beautiful._

_"Stop acting like a wimp, you act like we've never shared bodily fluids." He said grinning at her intake of breath. "Don't act like you don't swallow." He said gaining a grunt from her._

_"Seriously if I didn't feel like my head was about to explode..."_

_"Shut up and drink." He ordered while pushing his wrist to her lips and surprisingly she had decided to stop fighting him. This would help her in the end and he wouldn't have to watch her pass out from her concession or fear that in her state that her magic would go awol._

_I could feel my body getting stronger and when I had enough I tried to step back only to have Damon to continue to hold onto me. "I should go check on Stefan." I said looking over to where the staircase was located. Damon had the ability to take one look at me and make me feel stark naked. Inwardly I winced at the mere thought of my appearance. I was positive all of mascara had run down my face as I cried while watching my best friend being tortured. The pony tail I had in my hair was now hanging low and I knew for sure that the tendrils that framed my face were caked with mud- yet here Damon Salvatore a man who was not only a neat freak but insanely clean was holding me in his arms like I wasn't a filthy mess._

_"Or you could stay here." he said sticking his tongue out and licking the residue of his blood that had painted my lips._

_I let out a gasp._

_"What am I going to do with you- you stubborn, stubborn girl?" he asked his arms still wrapped around me._

_Now it was my turn to lick my lips._

_ "You could have gotten yourself killed or abducted." He ranted as his eyes went dark and wide._

_I furrowed my eyebrows his way and bit back a smile. "Carful Damon." I said standing on my tip toes and placing a kiss to the side of his lips. "Carful Damon, the house of cards you built is about to fall." I said before walking away._

_End of flashback_

The sound of tapping had brought me out of my revere and I found Stefan tapping on my bedroom window. Sitting up, I gladly opened the window and within a flash Stefan was sitting on my window pane a look of confusion settling on his handsome features.

"How long have you, were lurking outside my window?" I asked a knowing smile on my lips at the sheer look of panic that crossed his features.

Scratching his head. He spoke. "I wasn't lurking." He defended. "I was checking in on you." He rattled on. "What exactly are you doing?" he asked biting back a grin.

"I'm debating how the mighty have fallen." I said rather melodramatically causing Stefan to smirk before crossing his arms.

I watched Stefan watch me waiting for the moment when I would probably tell him everything I was feeling. However, I didn't want to do that...not today. Stefan had spent the better half of the last two weeks at my side being the perfect friend and I wanted him to stop worrying about me because I was fine.

"So" he said walking over to my bed and picking up the outfit Caroline had instructed me to wear tonight for our pub crawl. "I heard you and Caroline were going out tonight, do I even want to know what's on your agenda?" he said while finding a seat at the foot of my bed.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't even know what is on our agenda but I swear to you if she dares to set me up on some stupid blind date..." I say pausing for better lack of words. "I will set her on fire." I say gaining a light chuckle from Stefan.

"Well then best of luck." He says a sadness reaching his eyes and I know he's thinking about Elena. Sometimes Stefan allows me to see the hurt he's feeling instead of hiding it away so that he can ease my pain.

"Why don't you join us, you can be my wingman and I can be your wing woman?" I say hopefully.

"No thanks" Stefan says quickly. "I'll let you and Caroline bond over normal girl things." He says with a smile.

I'm on the verge of giving him the finger because we both know that with my luck I will be stuck at the pub with some loser talking my ear off while Caroline is having the time of her life. "Stefan, we bond all the time." I say causing him to actually laugh my way. "What?" I ask as he continues to chuckle.

"That sounds dirty." He says wiggling his eyebrows my way.

I roll my eyes typical. Since that faithful night it was almost like Stefan was a completely different person. Although I had known he was still hurt by Elena and her actions with Damon, not to mention I was sure he still loved her, without Elena- Stefan smiled more. He was happy and it wasn't like the weight of the world was on his shoulders anymore. In all he was in bliss if only temporary and I could understand that because I was looking for my own temporary bliss.

It was on the tip of my tongue to say he sounded like his brother but that was a topic neither of us wanted to venture into. "Spoken like a true pervert." I say gaining another chuckle from him.

"Listen Bon, I want you to have fun tonight and remember if you need me, I'm only a phone call away okay." Stefan says the mood changing as he places both his hands on my shoulders. Stefan was a true friend, he was my best friend and if I had learned anything from the whole delena incident I learned that no matter what, Stefan had my back and I had his.

"Ok" I say as he begins to leave. "Stef, its okay to miss them...I miss them too." I say hoping to get a reaction out of him but instead I hear him wish me a good night and soon he's breezed out of my room into the night.

**-BB-CF-**

"So are you ready to have fun tonight?" Caroline asked causing me to look over at her with a smile.

"Yeah." I say for the first time really meaning it. I needed to get out there and have fun. I couldn't continue to be depressed over a situation that was damned from the beginning. And I deserved some kind of happiness. Damon had already taken so much from me and tonight, I was ready to get it all back. "Besides, someone once told me the best way to get over someone was to get under someone else." I say winking in her direction.

"And that person is a freaking genius." She beamed. "On the real B, I want you to have fun tonight and remember that this is beginning of something good, and by the end of the night you'll forget about all the bad stuff." She says to give me a hug.

I winked her way as way as we took our first shot of the night. The burn of the alcohol reminds me I'm alive and I feel looser then I have been in weeks, months maybe. When I was with Damon I felt so wound up, and even when we were in a state of temporary bliss I was still waiting for the other shoe to drop and now that it had dropped, I was ready to move on.

We've done a full lap around Purgatory before Caroline starts to suggest guys that could start my motor running again. Which I find slightly odd because last I checked she was the one going through a dry spell and as for me, I was just fine it hadn't been that long.

"Seriously B, you are never going to get any action with Stefan playing the role of smoldering brooding bodyguard." She said her eyes lighting up. "Unless you're into that- which I could see because he likes you and you like him and I guess if you think about it on paper you could totally be perfect together." she rattled on.

I snapped my fingers in front of her face. There was no chance in hell that I would ever hook up with Stefan. I couldn't deny that he was good looking because he was, but like as for anything going further then friendship that would never happen. "Caroline" I call placing my hands on both of her shoulders. "Is this some sort of blind date, are you trying to set me up?" I ask as my eyes dart back and forth at guys who I think could be possible prospects. I didn't even know what kind of guy I was looking for, or if I was looking for someone for that matter. It hadn't been too long since I had ended things with Damon and jumping onto the next guy hadn't been in the plan for tonight. However knowing Caroline this whole pub could be full of guys she thought I might be interested in. She could have even put up a billboard announcing I was single again. The thought made me shudder.

"Relax" She says grinning. "I didn't set you up I did announce via both of our facebook and twitter accounts that you were single so if some hot guy approaches you it's because he thinks you're hot." She says bubbly as ever.

I shook my head. This was classic Caroline.

And then the mood changed as Elena approached the two of us. I hadn't told Caroline the full story or the reasoning behind my breakup with Damon, nor had I informed her of Elena's role in my breakup. I knew that at the end of the day, Caroline wanted to have a normal life just like the rest of us and to take away any part of her normalcy because I had a problem with Elena wasn't the right thing to do, so I put a smile on my face.

Before I know it, Caroline had fluttered like a butterfly leaving Elena and me alone. The tension between the two of us is so thick that I feel like I might explode by the close proximity. Although I am smiling on the outside to people I feel as if cracks in my facade are starting to show and the longer we stand together acting as if everything is fine for the benefit of everyone else, the harder it is for me to pretend.

"Can I talk to you?" she asked once Caroline is fixated on some random guy and its on the tip of my tongue to tell her to go straight to hell-however, I resist the urge to do so because Caroline is close enough that she could possibly hear the two of us. Without saying a word I lead the two of outside where the loud music from the bar is nothing more then thumping noise and echoed cheers.

Once we are alone, I turn sharply to her glaring. "You have some nerve."

"Caroline invited me." She said simply, not bothering to say anymore.

"Right! And let me guess you thought I would bring Stefan with me so you could sink your hooks into him all over again." I said while crossing my arms over my chest.

"I don't want to talk about Stefan." She says before biting on a hangnail.

"What do you want Elena?" I asked not wasting any time. I didn't want to talk to Elena but I refused to give her any more power over me then she had in the past. I had spent so much of my past relationship with Damon an insecure mess, because of Elena and tonight I would finally put the nail in the coffin of my friendship with her once and for all.

She ran her hands through her dark hair before speaking. "I haven't seen or heard from you in a long time and I was worried about you." She says as if it is the most obvious thing in the world.

I can't help but let out a scuff in return. Not only was she a liar, and a cheater but it appeared that Elena was getting to be delusional because we stopped being friends the night I found her probably after she had deep throated my boyfriend.

"When are you going to get it through your head, I want nothing to do with you!" I admitted so rawly that it had surprised me. I was still very angry and very hurt by the situation and I couldn't deal with anything related to the situation. "And as for your concern you take it and shove it." I spat out. "Because we both know the real reason behind your quote in quote concern is because you don't want me to tell anyone what a scheming bitch you really are." I finished causing her to take a dramatic step back as if I had slapped her pretty little face. I on the other hand felt better with each hurtful word I said to her.

After a moment of silence she spoke. "I don't want to argue with you. B, you're my bestfriend."

"No" I said sharply. "We were never friends because if we were friends you never would have gone after my boyfriend because I would have never gone after yours." I say causing a drunk couple to look our way.

"Bon," she calls hoping to appeal to the softer side of the witch. "I know you're mad that you're hurt but we've been through too much to end our friendship over a guy." She says pleading with big brown eyes.

"Why Damon?" I ask quietly, as my voice began to break. That was the question I had wanted answered most. "You had a wonderful guy who would have done anything for you...he did everything for you and you tossed him away like he was freaking garbage."

"I don't know. "She says shamefully. "All I know is that Katherine ruined everything by coming back here, if she had stayed away me and Stefan would have never broken up and..."

I couldn't help but roll my eyes. I had- had the same conversation with Damon and he too blamed Katherine for all his problems. Katherine didn't ruin our lives. Damon and Elena ruined our lives. "God you sound just like him." I said repulsed by her words. Maybe they were more alike then even I had known. "You can blame Katherine for a lot of things but this is on you Elena" I nearly shouted causing a group of people to look our way, I noticed among the group was Mason Lockwood. It figured he would see me looking like a maniac.

Choosing to lower my voice I spoke. "You choose to break up with Stefan and you knew how much he loved you. And as for our situation, well I found you with him, not Katherine and that makes you the worst of the two evils in that situation. " I spat out. "So if you're looking for someone to blame, look in the mirror it's you not Katherine." I said before turning on my heel. It was pointless talking to Elena because she was used to playing the victim, and now that the tables were turned she couldn't face the fact that she was just like Katherine but worst, because I expected Katherine to do something like this, as for Elena I had never expected her to hurt me.

"Wait!" she says as panic starts to set in. Reaching out she grabs a hold of my arm. " You've been my best friend, my sister since forever-we've survived everything together, my parents, Isobel, your mom and dad, the supernatural and grams." She said pausing as tears dripped down her face. "We shared our secretes, stories of our first time and everything in between good and bad. If one of us went down, both of us went down...together." She said pausing. "I'm so sorry that I took for granted our friendship...and I hope one day you can forgive me."

Although her words were sincere, and so true I had known better then to trust Elena ever again. She had played the game better then Damon and as good, as Katherine-the girl in front of me was no longer my friend, in fact she was nothing to me. "Elena you can take your apology and got to hell." I said stalking over to the door, before turning around to face her. "I didnt tell Caroline because she doesn't deserve to be put in the middle of this, plus I think she might just kill you." I say smirking. "Don't make me regret it." I say before turning on my heel again.

"Bonnie, do you think we'll ever be friends again?" she asked weight shifting from one foot to the other.

I let out a sigh. "Don't hold your breath, because I don't know when or if I'll ever want to be your friend again Elena." I said finally leaving her to stand outside all alone.

**-BB-ML-BM**-

After my emotional talk with Elena I headed straight for the bar, if I were going to make it through the night without cracking. I needed something strong to at least loosen me up because I felt like I was about to blow and I didn't want to do that. Stefan had been right, I was an emotional person and my powers were affected by my emotions and if I wanted to keep a lid on my powers I needed to relax. Once I get to the bar I find myself in the company of Emmet who happens to be a friend of the Salvatore brothers. It figured he would be working tonight, because that was my luck.

"I don't want to talk about it." I say cutting off whatever the bartender may have wanted to say. "I need a drink, something strong." I say meeting his eyes.

"Bonnie." He says with a tired sigh. And by the tone of his voice I knew he knew.

"Let me guess, Stefan asked you to keep an eye on me tonight in case things got out of control?" I asked raising an eyebrow his way. It would be so typical of Stefan to want to take care of me, even when he was hurting as well.

Leaning on the bar he spoke. "Actually Damon passed through here before heading out and asked me to keep an eye on both of you." He said before ghosting off as more people approach. And I don't know what it worst, knowing that Damon for once wanted to do right, or knowing that his efforts don't matter at all in the end. Once again my mood was soured if not by Elena, by Damon trying to do right by me and Stefan but it was a little too late.

Im alone all of five minutes before I feel someone saddle up close behind me. Before I can even tell the person off for invading my personal space a voice stops me. "Trouble in friendship paradise." a voice close to my ear says. "Remind me to never get on your bad side." he says his voice rough and playful at the same time.

And its then that I recognize the voice, it's the voice of Mason Lockwood.

Taking a deep breath I turn around in my chair I caught sight of Mason Lockwood, also known as hot uncle Mason to any girl who was the same age as his nephew Tyler. I could still remember being a shy thirteen-year-old girl who had harbored a crush on her fourteen-year-old boyfriends uncle. It didn't matter to me that Mason Lockwood was eight years my senior because every time he had walked into a room I blushed liked crazy. And now nearly six years later I still felt a swarm of butterflies in my belly. But unlike shy thirteen year old Bonnie, I had experience. I had dealt with attractive guys way older then Mason, in fact my ex was a ridiculously hot vampire and if I could handle Damon, I could handle Mason.

"Mason Lockwood." I say with all the false bravado I can muster.

"Bonnie Bennett, still beautiful as the last time I saw you." He says charmingly before joining me at the bar. "Do you want to tell me what's got a girl like you doing shots at the bar, or at least attempting to do shots at the bar?" he asks his eyes assessing the girl in front of him. He had known Bonnie Bennett for a long time, she had been his nephews first girlfriend. He could still remember how awkward he had felt for the next couple of years every time he had seen her. She had been beautiful even then, with forest green eyes and caramel skin, she had been a girl that many people had noticed. And now she was standing in front of him as a woman, dressed the part of a woman and he couldn't help but stare at her openly. The gold party dress she had donned had accented everything good about the now grown up beauty.

I bit my lip for a moment and noticed the way his eyes had kept darting from my lips to the rest of my body. "There is nothing to tell really." I say to shrug my shoulders. The last thing I wanted to do was be the girl that had spent her time harping on things that were out of her control and I was talking to mason freaking Lockwood and I'd be damned if I let this whole scenario with Elena wanting forgiveness and Damon ruin a perfect opportunity to swoon over Mason.

He nods his head before searching for reinforcements. Usually whenever he had spotted Bonnie, she was between the Salvatore brothers. He had been back in Mystic falls for a full year and he could only count on one hand the times he had seen the beauty out without an entourage. Usually he had seen her out with one, if not both Salvatore brothers. From what he had gathered from town gossip, she was bestfriends with the younger Salvatore, Stefan and had been romantically linked to the older one. For his part he could care less about both brothers, although he was aware that they were vampires, and they were aware of his werewolf state- it didn't really bother him. He had done his own thing, but tonight once he had seen the caramel beauty walk into the party without her boys it had gotten his attention.

"This is different." He says trying desperately not to stare her way but failing. Sometime during their conversation he had slide closer then he had expected and to his surprise she had done the same thing.

"What's different?" I ask looking up into his blue/ green eyes. Gosh his eyes were pretty, dark hair and light eyes had always been my Achilles heel. Hell, it was part of the draw that had led me to Damon...well that and his bad boy persona. Mason was different though you could tell by the look in his eyes, by the way he smiled and most importantly how he had dropped everything including his surfing career to offer support for his nephew.

"Usually whenever I see you, you're in some weird foursome with Elena Gilbert and the Salvatore brothers or a freaky incestuous threesome with the Salvatore brothers. " He says chuckling while I grimace.

"Stefan isn't one for partying." I admit looking down.

"And your boyfriend, where is he tonight?" he asked his word becoming more daring. To be honest he had been watching her for quite some time, captivated by her beauty and wanting nothing more then to garner her attention.

"I wouldn't know." I say letting out a haggard breath. "We broke up." I admit feeling better now that I had said the words to someone who wasn't apart of my close-knit friend group. The words had felt like an anchor had been lifted from my shoulders.

"His loss then" he says leaning forward inhaling the perfume that she had worn. "If I were your man, I wouldn't let you go so easily." He says a playful tone in his voice.

I couldn't help but smile. Mason Lockwood was still charming as ever. I guess that was why every girl who had met him swooned over him." Tell me, how many girls have you charmed tonight?" I ask leaning closer to him.

"None" he says easily. "However I do think I've found myself enchanted by a certain green eyed girl." He says admiring her beauty. The close proximity had given him a hint of Jasmin and vanilla once again. His eyes quickly searched her face before trailing down to her heart shaped lips before once again traveling back up to her eye, beautiful green eyes with flecks of yellow.

"Are you flirting with me?' I ask tilting my head to the side as some random chick dares to interrupt the two of us. I turn her way while Mason pays her no attention and soon she had walked away an annoyed look on her features. I furrow by brows surprised, Damon would have thrown the girl a bone but Mason kept his eyes on me.

"Maybe, would you be into it?" he questioned beer in hand as he quirked an eyebrow her way.

I lick my dry lips at the way he is looking at me. "Maybe." I say echoing, his own words while he continues to smile my way.

And before we get any further a group of his friends arrive ending whatever moment that had passed between the two of us and sending me back into the reality and out of my Mason bubble. With one last look in his direction, I slyly head back to my friends all the while feeling the heat of smoldering blue green eyes on me.

**-DS-DS-DS**-

**Damon**

Damon Salvatore watched at the girl in front of him moved her hips to the beat of the drum that was being played throughout the villa. His eyes traveled the length of the petite girl from her face to her exposed cinnamon navel. He had met her, the very day he had arrived in Spain. She was on vacation with friends and he needed a bite to eat. He tried not to dwell on the fact that her long dark hair and heart-shaped lips were reminiscent to another girl back home. He also would swear on a book of bibles that the cinnamon color of her skin was not a reflection of a green-eyed girl, with heart-shaped lips and dark hair as well, because that would be silly. He was Damon fucking Salvatore and the one thing he didn't do was dwell or brood over the fact that here he sat with a beautiful woman dancing in front of him for him, and yet he felt absolutely nothing, not lust or hunger.

After Bonnie had stormed out of the cabin he had decided to take a short trip and found himself in Spain. He didn't need to be told that he wasn't worth a damn because Katherine had already told him that with her undying love for Stefan. Elena had proved to be, well Elena, indecisive as usual and knowing that he had once again fucked up was not something he had wanted to think about, so why not go on an extended trip somewhere far enough where he could get back to doing things he liked, liked undressing women, and the thrill of hunting. With that said three days of a party soaked in debauchery, blood and regret had left him nearly bored. Miley the girl he had met compelled quite often and fed on was beginning to get stale. The girl, would of course do anything for him, sometimes he didn't even have to use compulsion, so what he called her by another name, she didn't seem to mind- but he did. Every time he stuttered _her_ name, every time he came it was like acid was laced on his tongue as he called out _her_ name.

With one last look to the girl he easily menders his way to the bar grabbing the bottle instead of bothering with a shot glass or even a flask -it was that kind of day. The kind when you wake up and realize that the person you thought you went to bed with- well wasn't they're and instead you were left with a figment of your imagination that kind of day. Bonnie had been in his dreams every night since he had decided to leave M.F. in the dust. He swore the witch had been taunting him purposely as a way to remind him how much her had hurt her.

"Well, well, well look what we have here." Katherine called as she walked through the villa in a black bathing suit and huge sun hat. "Who would have thought, I'd see the day when you were brooding." She finished stopping to gaze at the girl who was still dancing to the beat of the drums.

He says nothing but holds up the bottle to her mockingly, with a smile.

"I'm guessing this is all because you miss the witch." She said gesturing to the girl that was dancing.

Although the girl looked nothing like Bonnie she could honestly see why he had chosen this particular girl- it had shown that his taste had changed, no longer was he seeking someone that had resembled her face any longer.

"I'm actually on vacation Katherine, Mystic Falls was beginning to get old and I needed a change of scenery- what's your excuse? You want me to scratch an itch Stefan would never scratch?" he asked his lips curving into a smirk. Maybe Katherine could cure him of the Bonnie blues, though she was a raving bitch she could certainly take his mind off of the witch, and she'd be more effective then his private dancer.

"You know" she said while walking about the room. "I told you that you'd lose Bonnie, if you continued with this fixation with Elena and look at where its gotten you." she said grinning over at her shoulder at the cinnamon coated girl continuing to dance on the platform. "You fled Mystic falls but the witch is still on your brain."she pointed out

"What are you doing here Katherine?" he asked turning around to see that she was smiling his way. "Besides ogling my meal?" he asked noticing the way she licked her lips at the girl in front of the two of them.

"I'm here to congratulate you on a job well done!" she beamed. "You did something I couldn't do and that was to finally end Stefan and Elena." she continued while walking around him. "Of course you lost the little witch in the process but we can't all get what we want."

He blew out a puff of air. He was in no mood to deal with Katherine- no mood at all. "Trust me when I tell you that this is only the beginning for the two of them. Stefan loves Elena and Elena loves Stefan- you don't have a chance." he rapped out a smirk on his lips.

Grinning she spoke. "You may be right- Stefan loves Elena, and Elena loves Stefan but Stefan will never forgive you nor precious Elena, for hurting Bonnie." she said not missing the way he flinched at her words. "Your tryst with Elena, was bound to happen, but hurting Bonnie it ruined any chance for forgiveness."

He licked his lips. "Goodbye Katherine." he said irritated by her presence. He didn't need to be reminded of his mistakes he knew them.

Rolling her eye she spoke. "You can't always get everything you want- I should know I wanted you and Stefan and in the end I lost the one I really wanted." she said almost regretfully. "Here's a tip find out what you want and if its Bonnie- good, if its Elena- ok, but realize that a girl will never forget the one that made her fall hard."

He looked her way his eyes going wide. "Why are you telling me this."

"Because you helped me by ruining Stefan and Elena the least I could do was give you a bit of information that might help." She said walking away from him. "Now if you don't mind I plan on sinking my teeth and maybe my fingers into your toy." She says tossing a look over her shoulder. "What's her name?' she asked already grabbing the hand of the girl.

He smirked. "Her name is Miley but she answers to Bonnie."

Grinning she spoke. "Of course she does. Till next time Damon."

And with that she had vanished leaving him to start work on his newest plan. If he were going to get Bonnie back, he needed to bring his A game. She wouldn't make it easy for him, he knew that for sure so he'd have to break her down, but in the end when they were back together, she would look back fondly and remember that in the end she loved him...and he loved her and everything he did was in the name of love.

**-BB-ML-BB-ML**-

Once I make my way back over to Caroline and Elena I am instantly bombareded with questions from a overly giddy Caroline.

"Omg we saw it all!

"Saw what?" I ask trying to conceal my giddiness. Flirting with Mason had been fun, it had been light and it was good take my mind of the ever present drama. Sometimes a girl just needed to have fun.

" You and Mason Lockwood were like practically on top of each other. You were so busy having eye sex that you didn't even notice that half the bar was waiting for the moment he would take you on the table or just throw you over his shoulder and take you home with him tonight." Caroline exclaims a twinkle in her eyes.

I felt my face grow hot. "We were not on top of each other." I point out daringly tossing a look in the direction of him, only to see that Mason and his friend were now joined by a group of guys and his "friend" was now in the arms of one of those guys. I mentally filed that bit of information away just as our eyes met and I bashfully looked away.

"Seriously B! He wants you and you want him, I mean even a blind person could see it. And everyone here felt the sexual energy between the two of you. It would be so hot, way hotter then you and demon." She said smirking. "And the best part about it is by the looks he's been sending your way you know you could drag it out and he'd totally be down for it, he'd probably let you do anything you want to do and before you know it he'll pull your hair and you'll bite his neck and..."

"Caroline, don't you think it's a bit too early." Elena says causing me to look in her direction.

"No," Caroline says simply. "It's not too early. I'm team Bonnie all the way and after what the jackass did to her she deserves a good night and if your team Damon then this is the wrong place for you." She says as Elena sits back in her chair.

I looked between the two of them deciding to end the sex talk. "Seriously its never gonna happen, so we can stop talking about my sex life."

"Care to make a wager? She asked while rubbing her hands. "If I win I get to borrow those Prada boots Damon bought you a couple of weeks ago, and when your coming down from your sexual high I want all the details and to be told that I was right." Caroline says.

I shake my head her way, usually I would never ever indulge in anything of the sort but tonight was the start of something new. "And when I win you have to promise to not try and meddle in my love life."

"Guys is this really necessary" Elena chimes in while Caroline and I make the decision to shake on our bet. I may have been a tad bit the tipsy side, I may have even harbored a crush on Mason but I could easily say that hooking up with him was probably the last thing I would do. It felt good to be wanted by someone and to flirt, without the weight of everything on my shoulders, it was all in fun and games, I would not hook up with Mason Lockwood.

**BB-CF-EG-**

Loud music throbbed through the speakers as bodies were beginning to twist, turn and wither underneath the glare of the lights. We had danced the night away taking shot after shot which would probably be a bad thing in the morning but for right now I felt like wings were starting to sprout and I wanted to keep flying. This night has turned into the best post breakup celebration ever and I wanted to continue forever in fact I had wished that Stefan was here to celebrate with me, he too was now free and that meant he could be happy just like me. I spin around from my latest dance partner, who happens to be the ever handsome bartender Emmet to see that Caroline has managed to lure Tyler her way and I can't help but let out a squeal in appreciation. My eyes also scan for Elena and I find that she has slithered away -probably out of fear of what the alcohol would make me say, she wouldn't want me to leak her dirty little secret.

I let the music take hold of me and soon I was dancing like a video vixen from the eighties as pour some sugar on me was sung by a cover band. I whipped my hair back and forth while withering my body to and fro and soon felt someone slide up against me. The familiar smell of sandalwood and heat flooded my senses as we rocked back forth together. "I didn't take you for the stalker type" I say not bothering to turn around to see his face. I hear his deep chuckle in my ear and I can't help but shiver. I can feel my face heat up at the close proximity and my body is lit aflame by one touch.

He let out a rough chuckle. "There is a first time for everything, and I wasn't stalking, lurking but not stalking." He says the timbre of his voice causing my legs to become shaky. The music that was once so loud and so booming becomes so distant as only the beat keeps the two of us moving and the sound of his voice is the only thing I can hear.

I feel a smirk on my lips. "I'm sure you say that to all the girls." Say as we bump and grind.

Out of the corner of my eye I catch sight of Caroline yet again and she is looking at me almost scandalized and instead of stopping what I was doing I continued to wither around with Mason. This was as close to sex as I was going to get with the elder Lockwood, so why not have fun with it.

"You're the center of attention, and every guy in here has been wondering what you'd look like underneath" he says his voice coming out much thicker and gravely then he had intended. At their first encounter he hadn't been able to keep his off of her, his friends who had been down from Florida had even commented on how hard he was watching her and that hadn't stopped him. He had been simply memorized by everything about her, the way she walked, the way she laughed and tossed her head back when doing so and most of all the way her skin had glowed. And watching her dance had proven to be his undoing because before he knew it he had saddled up to the caramel beauty, with the uttermost confidence.

"Where's your friend?" I asked causing him to chuckle again.

"Somewhere around here" he murmurs as his hand trails down to my hip.

Spinning around I see a familiar I know I look good, you know I look good, grin on his features. "Your friend is giving me dirty looks." I say nodding in the direction of the girl from earlier. She seemed to have a bigger stick up her ass then the last time I saw her, which was two hours ago. A faux pout played on my lips as he tossed his head in the direction of the girl before turning his attention back my way.

"I like you," he said while wrapping an arm around my waist and bringing me closer. "And you like me or else you would've left a long time ago." He said pointing out the obvious. He knew she could feel it the heat, the tug from the invincible rope that had linked the two of them together.

I bit my lip and wrapped my arm around his neck while still moving to the music. "Oh really, you think I like you?" I ask as he holds me closer to him.

And then he kissed me. I melted into his touch for a moment before returning the kiss with vigor. The moment our mouths met it was like fireworks went off behind my eyelids and I wasn't sure if it were rushing hormones, lust pumping in my veins or the fact that I was actually kissing Mason Lockwood! As our mouths connected, I saw glimpses of the two of us together causing me to pull back breathlessly.

When we pull back I'm breathless in a good way and I can't help but grin.

Just as he's about to say something I feel someone tap my shoulder and I prayed it wasn't A) Stefan, or B) Damon. Luckily for me its Elena.

"Bon, maybe you should come home with me." she says slowly as if I need to process her request.

I glare her way. "Elena you are the last person I would ever want to go home with." I say as Mason looks between the two of us.

"Trust me, when dust settles you'll regret it." she says openly. "I know I do."

I say nothing to her and turn around to face Mason. "I'm ready when you are." I say taking hold of his hand. Im aware that people are starting to look at the two of us, and im positive they have figured out that Damon and I are no longer a couple, and I was sure the rumor mill was going to be on fire by the next day.

Hand in hand the two of us walk out of Purgatory into the sobering night air. The sound of the pub is off in the distance as the two of us walk silently our hands still clasp together although the night air had sobered us up considerably.

"Are you sure?" he questioned. In the back of his mind he knows he should take her home and call it a night. But he cant help but want to be around her, she's enchanted him

"Positive!" I say as he leads the way. Tonight was the start of something good. Tonight was the night I wouldn't look back on anything, no regrets.


	5. Chapter 5

**A.N. Hey all, happy Jagged Edges day! Thanks for reading and replying! I am so happy that you all seemed so excited about the last chapter. I thought it was time we started to get into the flow of the story and also time for Bonnie to have fun and what better person to have fun with, then mason. I had a lot of fun with this chapter, so i hope you like it. this is the chapter that sets the stage for for the chapters to come**

**special thanks to: 7jazmine7, The Dead Masquerade, Ella Chocolate, Ladyjaxs999, kivaJayelle, randomlittlyeme, beautifulcurare, ellenah, babyshan211, Toni Michelle, y, aprilf00l and Skye Samuelle**

_"Every word is a new regret if you say it right, Every wound can be forgotten in the right light"_

**Chapter 5: Under my skin**

The next morning I had awakened in a bed that wasn't my own, in fact it didn't seem to belong to anyone I would normally share a bed with. Looking down I realized at least had some clothes on, an oversized grey t shirt that had probably gone far below my knee. As I took in the room that was decorated with the colors of lush green forest and the smell was fresh and clean. And I fought to remember what the hell had happened last night. The last thing I had remembered was getting into another fight with Elena and then I had left the bar with...Mason Lockwood. Opening my eyes I felt my face heat up as I remembered everything about last night, every single dirty, shameful thing.

_Flashback_

_I felt like I was laterally flying high after the motorcycle ride from the bar to the Lockwood Mansion. Who knew that riding a monocycle would be so thrilling. The rush I had gotten from the ride was something that I had expected, I loved the feeling of the wind rushing to my face and then there was the handsome guy whom I had the pleasure of riding with, this was going down in the books as one of the coolest nights I had taken part of in a very long time. Once we entered the mansion I felt a tremble run down my spine as Mason led the way. I had always loved the Lockwood estate and the good thing about it, was that even though life had changed as it should, this place would always be the magnificent beauty that it had always been and it was a sight for sore eyes._

_Mason led the way to the entertainment room with me following close behind our hands clasped together before we found a place to sit. I watched as he turned on his I pod, letting music fills the room. The distinctive sound of Prince floated to my ears. I had recognized the song as "Do me" and our eyes met at the moment the first thunderous moan was uttered. I couldn't help but smirk as Mason had quickly pushed a button changing the song to something I hadn't recognized at first but then I realized it was yet another great song, by Robin Thicke." Sex therapy."_

_"Tell me, do you have your I pod set for all the girls or am I special?" I asked trying to ease some of the tension that had already built up between the two of us. We were both aware of what was going to happen, and I guess in a way I should have felt ashamed, but really I felt liberated in fact I had been feeling very liberated since I had gotten rid of everything that was Damon._

_He let out a chuckle while gathering two beers. "My I pod has a mind of its own." He says a grin tugging on his lips. "And I haven't brought a girl here in a long time, despite town gossip." He said to give her a pointed look. He knew that the town gossipers had said he was hooking up with any girl that had lifted her skirt in his direction but that hadn't been true. Although he had a good time, he hadn't had a different girl here every night, he didn't like bringing women back to his house, it was his number one rule that was never to be broken until tonight._

_I took the extended beer and raised a brow as he continued to look at me. "I bet it does." I said before taking a sip of my beer._

_"So, do you want to talk about the reason you were so eager to leave with me tonight?" he asked while plopping down on the side of her. He let his eyes rake over her exposed skin before bringing them back to her mint green eyes._

_I let out a small noise that was between a scuff, laugh and anything that would stop the two of us from talking about my reasons, which were the same as his, I was attracted to him and he was attracted to me, normally I would never take part in something like this but a girl had to shake things up occasionally. " I thought that was quite obvious" I said leaning my body his way, while looking him square in the eyes, my jade eyes, meeting his Persian green eyes and something flickered between us... heat, because suddenly it felt like the room was scorching hot and the only thing I wanted to do was rid myself of the offending material. A sense of De Ja vu, hits me like a ton of bricks while I remember a similar scenario with Damon. Our first time was rushed and steamy but I felt something that night as well flicker between me and the vampire that later broke my heart._

_His hand reaches out to touch me, and I can do nothing but lean closer to him as he leans closer to me. His eyes have a hint of yellow and I know I should be worried because there is something inside of him that could take over, but instead of being scared I feel myself being drawn into it. We're inches a part and his warm breath dances on my face. "I've spent half the night trying to talk myself out of wanting you." He said leaning forward and nipping at my bottom lip._

_I felt my breath hitch with his every word. His hands were everywhere on my face one minute, in my hair and around my waist. It was like he couldn't get enough of me, and we hadn't even gotten naked yet. "Why?" I asked surprised by his admission._

_I had slithered his way, straddling his lap. With Mason I feel this strength I had been lacking with Damon. Although I can truly admit that while I was with Damon their were times when I felt like I had this feminine power, I felt it more so with Mason. It could have been due to the fact that I knew for a fact that Damon had been around the block more times then I wanted to count. Or maybe it was because with Damon I wanted more and with Mason, I wanted to have fun._

_" I don't take advantage of women especially those who've just broken up with their boyfriends." He said simply and fiercely. He gripped her hips as she rolled them against him. She was sinful and the look in her eyes almost made him lose his will. Where was the shy girl he had seen dating his nephew years ago, where was the girl who had shyly looked his way at the bar before turning her attention back to her friends? If this was what Bonnie Bennett was like behind closed doors, a woman who knew what she wanted and went after it, he wanted to see her more often._

_I lean forward again as mouth dances along his, I move in for the kiss and then pull back as he pushes forward. I smirk as he lets out a hiss once I roll my hips against his once again. "Do I look like a girl that is being taken advantage of?" I ask as my brow arches. I bite my lip and slink closer to his face. "I know what I want." I say, as my hand rest on his cheek. He soon surprises me and grips the back of my head bridging the tiny distance between the two of us._

_Our lips meet and I feel like all of the air from my lungs has been stripped from me and that's perfectly fine. I know that we're both running on pure lust, and hormones but it feels so good to be wanted, and to know that person that I want in this instant wants me, just the same. His lips travel down the length of my neck and for the first time in a long time, I can feel my heart beating all over again. I bite on his lips as the two of us break away from each other for air. We're both breathing heavy and before I know it we're attacking each other yet again our hands and mouths are connected as we manage to move through the mansion making pit stops to catch our breath and then he lifts me up so that my legs are around her lower torso and we've managed to make it to his bedroom._

_His shirt has been discarded in the process of our movements and my dress is scattered in shreds across the floor and our mouths keep dancing. He drops me with a thud on the bed and I bite my lip at the pure look of lust in his eyes. The passion that is brewing in his eyes cause me to shiver as I blindly reach for him. His knee is pressed against me and I feel my breath hitch at the contact._

_"So beautiful" he murmurs below my earlobe before rolling us over allowing me to control the flow of things. My hands roam his naked chest and I can't help but grin at him because he's grinning at me._

_"You like this?" I ask as my clothed lower half dances with his clothed lower half._

_"I like you." He says flipping me over so that he is now on top and suddenly it really hits me. Im about to have sex with Mason Lockwood and I feel a swarm of butterflies finally develop in the pit of my belly. The only other time I had felt this feeling where I would throw caution in the wind was when I was with Damon that first night, I was reckless then too, I was emotional and he was needy and..oh god I was thinking about him and Mason had managed to slither southward._

_I could feel his mouth dancing along my body nipping as he continued to go further down. I bit my lip in anticipation and then he kisses me their. My eyes shut almost on their own accord as his mouth makes love to me. Im in pure bliss as he continues his ministrations and before long I'm riding out my high._

_"You okay?" he asked resting on his elbow. He had a habit of licking his lips in a way that made my body literally want to melt and after what he had just done, I was sure that I would melt._

_"Yeah" I said little out a breathy sigh. I had no idea that it would be like this but hot damn I felt like I needed a cigarette and I didn't even smoke. I lay as he continued to peer at me, while I breathing became stable. I chanced a look his way and he simply gave me one of those amazing Mason Lockwood grins._

_"Good" he said while gently stroking her neck. "You should get some rest." He says fondly._

_Alarm bells rang in my head. I let out a strangled gasp this was the second guy who didn't want me. "Is that your way of telling me to get lost?" I asked not liking the turn of events. I didn't give him a chance to say anything because soon I tried to make a move to get the hell out of dodge, I was such and fucking idiot! "You don't want me. I get it." I say, ready to make my move, as his warm hand shoots out to hold me in place._

_Licking his lips. He speaks slowly. "I want you, so fucking bad." He growls. "But not tonight, tonight your gonna let me hold you and if you still want me tomorrow your wish will be my command." he says cheesily before pulling me down onto his body._

_"Is that I promise?" I asked snuggling into his warm embrace, I had to admit I was a little sleepy. Sex and booze had always worn me out._

_"It's a guarantee." he says kissing me on the shoulder as I close my eyes and drift off to dreamland._

_End of flashback_

I was brought out of my thoughts by the sound of the doorbell. Without shame I quickly got out of the bed thankful that I had a shirt on that had covered a decent amount of my skin. The sound of silence was starting to get the best of me and soon I found myself tip toeing out of the bedroom and listening at the top of the stairs out of view of course to Mason and his friend Jules from the night before.

"Here's the clothing you wanted." She said, while tossing him a bag.

"Thanks, it means a lot Jules." He said.

"Really does it mean more then your life." She huffed.

"What the _hell_ is your problem?" he asked walking the expanse of the foyer.

"Seriously Mason! What were you thinking, she belongs to a vampire and yet here you are shacking up with her and don't even deny it Mason Lockwood." The girl said sternly. "I can smell her all over you, and he will to." She finished her arms crossed.

"She has a name and its Bonnie and she doesn't belong to a _vampire_...nobody does." he said tossing a dark look at her over his shoulder.

"You did." She said smartly. "You were blind and in love, and you didn't listen to me." She said pausing. "You're my bestfriend and that girl is trouble."

"I'm not discussing Bonnie with you." He says, ending the conversation and walking to the door before motioning for her to do the same.

"You like her. "She said simply. "I saw it in your eyes and she likes you, you're attracted to each other but that wont change the fact that when push comes to shove she'll run back to her boyfriend. Witches always side with vampires Mason, and just because she fucked you doesn't mean it'll change anything."

He glared her way once again. "I'm going to do what I want to do and you're gonna have to deal with it Jules and so is the rest of the pack."He said harshly. "Vampires fog up your senses and she has to know that it'll fade for her...it faded for me." He stressed out.

"Mason, do us all a favor and get it out of your system." She said desperately. "Do it till you both can't walk anymore and then cut her loose. Men go to war over women and supernatural go to war over witches. We don't need a war Mason, werewolves and vampires already have a sorted past- we don't need a witch to add to the mounting problems we already have with her supreme dick of a boyfriend." She said before walking out of the ajar door.

From my position obscured from their view I glared at the blond before retreating back to the bedroom, This chick had some nerve, she didn't know me at all and to judge me simply because I was once the girlfriend of Damon Salvatore was horrible. Immediately upon returning to the bedroom I reach for my cell and find that I had missed multiple calls from supreme dick himself and roll my eyes at the icon that signals that I've gotten a voice mail. I wasn't in the mood to deal with Damon and his shit, and I was tired of his lame declarations of love or hate while in a stupor.

When I looked up Mason Lockwood had appeared with a tray of food. A ghost of a smile on his lips as he caught me sitting up in his bed my legs crossed at the ankles while I searched through my phone.

"I thought you might be hungry- you know eavesdropping can work up an appetite." he said while standing before me in a grey shirt and blue pajama bottoms.

I let my eyes rake over him once or twice before smiling up at him. "Actually I was looking for you." I say while folding my knees under me, before scooting toward him. I watch as his eyes dance for moment before sitting right in front of him.

"Really-what could you possibly want from me?" he asked while keeping his eyes trained on her every move. The words of his friend Jules had rung in his head as he her mint green eyes met his. This thing, fling or not had the potential to end horribly wrong but in the end they were all adults and they were all going to do what they wanted to do in the end. And what he wanted to do was have her spread out for him, while she was singing his name in highest praise. It didn't matter that she had been with a vampire- it also didn't matter that her ex was Damon Salvatore. He wanted Bonnie Bennett and in the end he would have her, no matter what.

"I wanted to thank you for last night." I say as he licks his lips suddenly. I feel a blush creep up to my cheeks as I can remember his tongue getting to know me intimately. I wasn't the type of girl to just go home with a guy, and I didn't do one night stands or hook up with random people but their was something about Mason that had called out to me, I couldn't explain the intense pull I felt to him. It was a feeling I couldn't ignore and the longer I was in his presence, the more I have the tug pulling me to him.

"Trust me. The pleasure was all mine." He says his voice coming out raspy as he thinks of the way he had explored her body. She had tasted as good as he thought, it was like candy on his tongue, no sugar had ever tasted as good as her. He had one taste and already he wanted more. "Besides when I have you-I want you to be sober so you can remember every little detail." He said before chuckling.

I raised my eyebrow his way before sitting up on knees once again, before removing the oversized. I bite my lip as his eyes rake over my form and pray that my hair at least looks decent because if not then I was sure I looked like a fool. My body heats up as the sound of a thunderous growl emits from his throat "It's your's if you want it." I say boldly.

He couldn't help the curse word that flew out his mouth as he she bared it all in front of him...for him. Without much thought he took the few strides that had separated the two of them so that he was standing rightly in front of her. She looked simply sinful, and he had wanted her bad. He had wanted her the way a man wanted a woman, he wanted her like a moth who was attracted a flame. In all if he had gone down in flames, at least he would go down with the taste of her on his lips.

Immediately he launches himself onto her small frame. Their mouths meet and it's even better then the first time they kissed. His mouth is kissing and licking her shoulder as her tiny hands have flown downwards to work on his bottoms. He lets out a moan as she strokes him once, twice, three times and devilish smirk playing on her lips as she does so. The animal inside of him is starting to come to the surface the moment as he nips at her lavish neck before sucking purposely. They move up and down round and round before she is straddling him with a sexy look on her face.

Pulling back I look at him, to see all the lust in his electric blue green eyes and I wonder if I look the same. My body felt in sync with his as we continued to tease one another. Whenever I touched him it was like I could feel everything he was feeling, and I reacted to it. Leaning forward I place a simple kiss on his neck before licking a trail from his chest to below. Our eyes meet before I take him into my mouth. I wanted to do for him what he had one for me and so much more, his hands fist in my hair as I go up and down, round and round and before I know it, I'm crawling back up his body as he peers at me through heavy lidded eyes.

"You're good" he says a look of wonder crossing his features.

"That was just the beginning." I purr, my confidence soaring.

His hands skate all over me again while he takes control. It's obvious that all the teasing has gotten to the two of us and I let out a hiss when he finally sinks into me. The sound of heavy panting is loud as my body arches into him. The pace is slow, too slow and I wiggle my hips in hopes of changing the pace. My spine is tingling and I can't help but call his name. "Mason..Please" I say brokenly. And it's then that we start moving. Our bodies twist and turn in an intimate dance as our mouths do the same. We sing each others praises as the waves come crashing down, leaving us in a state of bliss.

**DS-DS-DS**

**Damon**

The manor was quiet, which wasn't a surprise. He had figured that Stefan had taken on the role of full time buzz killer and watch dog to everything that was Bonnie. He hadn't called her in a while, deciding it was better to leave her thinking he had given up that way when he showed up out of the blue it would be more of a surprise. Of course their was little he could do that would actually surprise the green eyed beauty. She had known him inside out, sometimes he even thought she had known him better then he had known himself and that was a frightening thought. Bonnie had managed to get inside of his head, and learn his thought process which was something that was often sporadic and off the wall at the same time.

Meandering over to the bar he poured himself a generous amount of whiskey the last time he had been here he had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Of course the night he was referring to was when Bonnie and Stefan had walked in on him and Elena. Although they hadn't gone through with the actual deed, they had done other stuff and he was positive that if they hadn't moved from his bedroom out of guilt of course they would have gone further then meeting each other half way. The sound of shuffling feet had caused him to turn quickly, looking over his shoulder he saw nothing and shrugged figuring it was his latest chew toy Lea. Just as the brim of the glass touched his lips he was instantly thrown to the ground by a strong force that had caught him off guard amber liquid fell to the ground as the sound of breaking wood and shattered glass hit his ears. Looking up he saw the green eyes of his brothers and before he could splutter a curse word or better yet get the upper hand a fire poker was shoved into his stomach.

He let out a thunderous howl as his brother continued to rest on the fire poker as if it were a cane. His eyes widen when he had seen a glimpse of a smirk forming on the lips of the saintly one, a dangerous glint in his green eyes. He figured this would happen that Stefan would try something but this was so unexpected...it had brought him back to the days of the ripper who had tortured his victims for days before finally finishing the kill.

"How does it feel?" Stefan Salvatore asked tilting his head to one side. "Does it hurt?" He asked again. "Maybe I should pry you open and leave you bleeding on the floor. " He says grinning.

He grunted out in pain as Stefan once again speared him yet another fire poker this time through his hand pinning him to the ground

"Stefan get the fuck off of me." He said through gritted teeth as his brother continued to torture him by twisting the fire poker in slow circles.

Chuckling the younger spoke. "I warned you that if you hurt her, I'd make you pay." Stefan says while looking at his brother who is now pinned on the floor fire pokers in both of his hands and stomach keeping him in place. "You killed Lexi, you killed my only real friend and then you broke Bonnie." He said venom seeping through every word. "You're my brother and I love you but I warned you that if you hurt her-I'd hurt you. You remember that don't you?"

He nodded his head already beginning to feel weak. He remembered all to well .The day Stefan had spoken about was the day he had told Bonnie that he had liked her- and back then it was a joke he had taken Stefan and his threat as a joke because really Stefan was afraid of his own shadow but that was before everything went sour with Elena and before he had betrayed both his brother and girlfriend.

_Flashback_

_It was a Saturday night and the usual suspects were currently occupying his library with the added bonus of two bubbling dogs in the form of Mason and Tyler Lockwood and that hadn't set well with him. Of course he had been outnumbered. Elena had said they needed more help, Caroline had told him to stop being a dick, and Bonnie had reminded him that he didn't need more enemies. Naturally Stefan had agreed with all three girls so they all sat together while Rick had gone through a monologue of myths and whatnot. Rick had been going on and on about something that he was supposed to care about but the only thing he could pay attention was her. It was hot summer day and today she had worn a sundress exposing her shoulders. The dress was modest enough, royal blue form fitting but not too tight and hit above her knee. He couldn't help but let out a tiny growl as she crossed and uncrossed her legs, never knowing the rustling of her panties were having an effect on him._

_Thirty minutes later Rick had ended his lesson on myths and everyone had scattered. Elena had gone to make a phone call to Jeremy, Caroline had tried and failed at flirting with Tyler who was more interested in the television then her, and Bonnie was too engrossed in a conversation with Mason Lockwood to notice that he had been trying to gain her attention._

_From his spot across from her he tried to get her attention but to his surprise she had been too engrossed in a conversation with the older Lockwood. Rolling his eyes, he strolled over to canter for a new drink. He didn't like being ignored and what made it worst was it seemed that he was being ignored in favor of two wolves and big headed brother._

_"I saw that." Stefan said causing him to look at him from the side of his eyes._

_"Saw what?" he asked his eyes going wide and then squinty. "Tell me Stefan what did you see, perhaps you saw your girlfriend checking me out because I am that hot!" he said a smirk forming on his lips as he watched his brothers forehead wrinkle before him._

_Crossing his arms, the green eyed man spoke. "I know about you and Bonnie." Stefan whispers causing his brother to roll his eyes. "She tells me everything you know." He added. "And I saw the way you were looking at her earlier." The younger Salvatore pointed out._

_He couldn't help but chuckle. "Stefan you sound jealous!" he quirked. "What would the girlfriend think if she knew how closely you watch the bestfriend?" he said grinning. "I bet you wonder what we do when we're alone, I bet you want to know all the things she lets me do to her, and all the things she does to me." He said enjoying when the vein in his brothers forehead began to throb._

_"Stop playing around Damon." Stefan rapt back. " She likes you for some odd reason and I think you like her...don't ruin it by being you because if you hurt her...you'll have me to deal with."_

_Just as he was about to say something along the lines of sarcastic comedy she had come up as if to ease some type of tension. The first thing that had hit him was the smell of vanilla and orange and something else that was all Bonnie. His eyes traveled along her face noticing for the first time that her long hair was in a side pony tail a simple gardenia flower pinned near her ear, while her face as usual had very little makeup and her lips...the pink hearts were begging to be kissed._

_"So what are you guys fighting about?" she asked coming to stand in front of the two of them._

_What makes you think we're fighting?" he asked whilst letting his eyes roam her body openly. He let out a slow smile her way before winking in hopes of getting a reaction but got nothing._

_She gave him a pointed look, it was common knowledge that he and Stefan were either fighting or plotting together, that was what they did most. "Anyway, I'm gonna head out so I'll see you later." She said, giving Stefan a hug before stepping back and looking his way. " I trust that the two of you can at least be discreet about your argument therefore when Elena gets back she wont get on my case for not stopping it."_

_He let out a chuckle as Stefan had decided to go do something. "I thought you were staying here tonight." He said as his hands itched to touch her skin._

_Now it was her turn to smile. "Actually, I had never agreed to stay here and Mason had found some family archives that had my family name in it, so I'm gonna go check it out." She said on the verge of turning away. Quickly he caught her arm._

_"Are you sure that's a good idea?" he asked as her green eyes narrowed his way. "I mean you did have a huge crush on him when you were thirteen and all and he might take advantage of it." He mumbled while loosening his grip._

_Narrowing her green eyes his way, she spoke. "How did you...who told you...You know what, forget it, the less I know the better. Mason is a nice guy, who was kind enough to tell me about the archives so if I want to hang out with him I can do so."_

_He gave her a dark look, no fucking way was he going to let her go with Mason fucking Lockwood. He had seen the lustful gazes the wolf had been sending her all night and what was worst was the fact that she had openly flirted with wolfy in his face for that matter._

_"First thing first, a guy only tells a girl like you about his super secret archive because he wants to get up your dress." He said looking from her legs up and licking his lips out of appreciation. "Second he's like thirty or near to it and he'll be balding soon while I'll always look this good, and third, why would you ever get a history lesson from him when I can be your teacher, all you have to do is get naked and we'll use your body as our map." He said cheekily._

_"Yeah and you're like 170 going on thirteen. Goodbye Damon." She said before turning swiftly on her heels._

_He had expected her to smirk his way at his clever humor and maybe give him a migraine but instead she turned away and said goodbye. She was going to go back to the Lockwood mansion and get seduced probably willingly seduced by Mason Lockwood or worst, maybe she would do the seducing, she'd probably even add some of the tricks he had taught her on the wolf and he couldn't have that, no fucking way._

_So he did what any other sane person would do, he stalked her on the way back from the bathroom and yanked her into his bedroom._

_"what the hell Damon?" she asked while crossing her arms in front of her chest defensively. "I know that this is how you attract the girls, you know stalking into submission and all but I am not one of those girls._

_"Stop talking." He said quickly as silence fell between them. Licking his lips he walked close to her, very close. " You're different from any other girl I've met in my entire existence. You talk way too much shit and you have way too much heart for your own good." He said pausing to let out a chuckle. Here he was Damon Salvatore and he was as nervous as Jeremy Gilbert in front of a pretty girl. "Why don't people ever say what, they really feel?" he asked causing her to look up at him with questioning green eyes._

_"I'll tell you how I feel, I'm bored and irritated and I'm about to give you aneurysm, so you might want to say what you want to say before I do so." She said before smirking._

_"You know I don't have a very good track record with witches, you're all so judgmental and all...but I like you." He said as his clear eyes bore into her mint green iris._

_"What?" she asked surprised by his words. She was used to Damon only giving her praises during sex because that was what he did, but to say that he liked her, sober and fully clothed was something different_

_"I like you...and I think you like me" he said, his eyes open for the first time when it came to Bonnie Bennett. "And I just wanted you to know that, before you go out searching through archives tonight with Mason._

_End of flashback_

He had remembered the day as if it had happened yesterday. Stefan had been using his vampire ears that day and for the first time in a long time, the two of them had an understanding over a girl, and not just any girl Bonnie Bennett. Opening his eyes he found he was all alone, the fire pokers still firmly placed in his stomach while his hands were free. The blinding pain caused him echoed in his body and it was then that he realized that maybe that was what Bonnie, was feeling and for the most part Stefan as well.

**-BB-ML-DS-**

After a blissful time with Mason I had returned home feeling better then I had been in days...weeks. Their was something about Mason Lockwood that was so carefree and so easy going that you couldn't help but join the fun with him. The time I spent with him had left me feeling unhinged and completely free of any negative energy, Who would have thought that me and Mason would have hit it off so well.

Pushing open the door I was surprised to see that my living room was transformed into my own person garden. The wooden floor is decorated in with gardenias, and wild orchids while tea lights lit up the living space. My breath hitches as I take in the beautiful scene in front of me, and I can't help but to wonder who would go through all of the trouble to do this for me. I knew Caroline was out of the question because well, I had been at the mansion all day and Tyler had yet to show up. I could only pray that Jeremy hadn't done this in order to gain my affection because that was out of the question. And Stefan, although he had always gone out of his way to do special things for me especially since my breakup as far as he knew I was still with Caroline.

Walking further into the room I picked up a gardenia and inhaled the scent, smiling to myself as I thought about my night and day with Mason. All too soon, the smile on my face disappeared as I felt a shadow looming over me. Spinning around sharply I ran smack dab into the devil himself, his blue eyes were clear and fierce as he forced eye contact with me.

"Do you like?" he asked his eyes darting all over her face. It had been too long since he had last seen her, in less you counted the number of times she had come to him in his dreams and that was probably to be spiteful. She looked pretty, her green eyes were vibrant and bursting with a flame he hadn't seen in such a long time. He plucked a gardenia from a nearby vase and gingerly placed the delicate flower behind her ear before trailing his hand down her neck.

His presence had startled me momentarily causing me to stand frozen in place before I swatted his hand away. Damon was here and he had done this, all of this for me. It was too much for me to handle and way too late to save our pathetic relationship. I took a cautious step backwards while eyeing him closely. "What do you want?"

"I think Stefan is back on human blood." He said, causing her to furrow her eyebrows his way.

He wanted to tell her that he came back for her- that while he was away she was the only thing he could think about, but that wasn't something he felt comfortable admitting. He knew Bonnie, and he knew that if he were to tell her that he had come for her, she wouldn't believe him, especially now. He had never been one to openly talk about his feelings because whenever he had done so, someone had always shut him down. And with Bonnie, she needed to reassured where she stood in his life, what she meant to him and it took Katherine telling pointing out what a loser he had become for him to realize that the girl he wanted, was the girl he had all along. That of course didn't mean he would confess his undying love for her while not under the pretense of being drunk because, he knew it was too soon for her to believe him, not after what he had done to her in the past.

I gave him a skeptical look. Stefan would never go back to human blood; he feared that with human blood it would take over and he didn't want to be that guy blood crazed. "If your brother attacked you, you deserved it." I say trying to move past him but failing once he grabs a hold of my arm

"He tried to kill me today, he laced my whisky with vervain and pinned me to the wooden floors with fire pokers nailed to my stomach and both hands." He said pausing to lick his lips."He was doing it to protect you." He said as their eyes meet. "He knew I was coming home to be with you."

I put my best poker face on, I would not let him get to me, not this time. The flower arrangement the declaration that he had come back for me, to me it sounded pretty but they were all lies.

"You don't look like you suffered too much." I say a ghost of smile tracing my lips. While I had burned up our past I had thought of many ways to torture the blue eyed devil ,ways to make him scream in agony that would not bring any pleasure his way. I had even entertained the idea of doing so, but if Damon was anything he was masochist. "Get out of my house Damon, or I will make you suffer." I say through gritted teeth. I watch as he pointedly grins my way and the mere look on his smug arrogant features has caused my temperature to soar and not in the good way. Suddenly the candles are flickering as my emotions start to run wild.

"I suffered plenty and that's why I came back for you." he said reaching out to stroke her face. God he missed her, he missed the fire the hummed in her veins, the way her eyes would light up whenever she felt any kind of emotion and most of all he missed the way she handled him. At most he was masochist.

His words had been the last stray, it was almost like he had gotten some sick pleasure out of playing mind games with me and since he found it so appealing I thought I might as well even the score and play some of my own. Quietly I started chanting in hopes of crippling him to the floor and sending him back to hell or at least out of my house as soon as possible. The words flew out of my mouth at a rapid speed as the candles flickered around us leaving the house dark, as the pale moonlight peaking through the huge windows. I could feel the familiar lull of the magic that was in the air as I my eyes closed at the sensation of outflow of my magic, the wind howled outside stirring my actions and when I opened my eyes in hopes of seeing Damon crippled over in a sense of pain that had been harbored within me, I saw him standing as if nothing had happened at all. In fact, nothing had happened. I felt the release of my magic however it hadn't effected Damon and that had scared me.

He smiled her way despite the situation and leisurely wandered over to the bar where he had kept a bottle of whisky for those times when he had found himself to lost in her to leave her side. "I thought absence was supposed to make the heart grow fonder." he says before tipping the now open bottle of whisky in his mouth. The sound of harsh panting causing him to stare her way as he places the bottle back down. "I thought that being away would ease your pain, and give us time to think- but" he says pausing as he begins to walk aimlessly around the living area. "I guess I was wrong. It's a good thing I always have a backup plan." he says stopping suddenly mere feet in front of her.

"My powers!" I say alarmed. And its then that I realize the kind of situation I have stepped into, a dangerous situation, with a dangerous man. I knew my powers were working, in fact that had only seemed to grow stronger the longer Damon had stayed away from me, in fact my anger had made me stronger, not just where magic was concerned but in every way possible.

He took his finger and lifted her chin up and smiled her way before speaking. "I wanted to give you time to think about what I said to you that last night." he said pausing. "But the only way you would take my words to the heart was if, you had no choice of the matter. I needed an insurance plan- and the only way to save us was to bind your powers, so that you could never harm me."

I took a dramatic step back as my gut instinct was telling me I needed to get the hell away from him. The words that had flown from his mouth so easily had nearly knocked me down in pain, and in fear. The man that had claimed loved to love me, the same man that I would have done anything for...the man I had done anything for had taken my powers away from me. "You-you took my powers away from me." I said shakily as I stood before him.

"No" he said fiercely, as he quickly appeared in front of her. As per usual he pinned her close with his body as his clear blue eyes bore into mossy green orbs. "With help from a friend, I had your power bound against me." he said simply. "You wouldn't listen any other way, so now I have your attention and I know you wont use magic against me." he said desperately. "I did this for us." he said as he soon took the necessary steps to bridge the gap between the two of them.

My breath came out in harsh pants the closer he came to me. As I looked his way I realized not for the first time, who the monster was in front of me. I felt violated by the mere fact that he bound my powers, if only against him. "Get out of my house Damon," I say pushing at him. "Get out of my life and leave me the hell alone." I shrieked while slapping at his chest. It had occured to me that we had been here before, I had said the same words to him but back then I hadnt meant it-I meant them today. I wanted nothing from him but for him to leave me alone. "I hate you." I say while trying to slap him while he makes a bold move and soon holds me to him, in a strong grip. My back is to his front as he places a kiss to my bare shoulder.

"And I love you." he says his words coming out smoothly despite the situation. It had been difficult to say those three words again, he had first said them to Katherine who laughed his heartfelt words off, then Elena who had taken a sudden gasp before reminding him that she had loved him in a friends only kind of way and now he was saying it to Bonnie, the girl who loved him back.

"You don't know what love is, your idea of love is obsession and I don't want that." I nearly screamed while trying to struggle out of his grasp.

He let out a chuckle, while continuing to hold onto her. "Their wasn't a day that I didn't think about you-so much that I couldn't look at another meal ticked unless she had toffee colored skin. And when I did find her, it was your face that I saw, when I stroked deeply into her. "He said fiercely into her ear. "It was your name that I called."he said while swiftly turning her around in his arms

"Stop it!"I say while willing my heartbeat to slow down. In a perfect world hearing Damon claim his love for me would have been everything I had ever wanted. Everything he had planned tonight, from the flowers decorating the living space to the tea lights that had once littered my hardwood floors had been something I would have enjoyed under different circumstances, however this had turned into a nightmare rather quickly.

"Do you remember how good we were together." he asked once again peering into my eyes. I watch as his lip curls into a small smile as if he is remembering fond times between the two of us and for a moment I am lost in my own memories, but more importantly I find myself gazing at him while he is lost in memories, he looks almost serene.

I bite my lip from refraining to speak of all the bad times we had shared together. It was easy to get caught up in the good times, but the good had never outweighed the bad.

Reaching out he once again brought her flush against him. He was running on alcohol, blood and heightened emotions. If Stefan had wanted to, he could have ended him today and the only person he could think of was Bonnie. He had to make things right between the two of them- he had to make her realize that he was serious about the two of them. "I know you still love me Bons," he says as he slants his mouth down on her succulent neck to pepper kisses. He listens as her heart beat quickens and feels the familiar stirring below his belly. "And while away in Spain I realized how much I loved you." he admitted quietly.

I shoved him with all my might and finally he got the hint and separated from me, although he hadn't gone very far but it was far enough. Whenever I was near Damon it was like I couldn't breathe- being around him was like being submerged underwater, because I could drown in him...I had drowned in him so many times and I had barley survived it. "Stop saying that! You don't love me, you never did!" I finally blew out.

He clicked his head to one side, recognizing the challenge that she had sent his way. She wanted him to prove it, prove that he loved her and he'd be up for the challenge and not only would he win but he'd remind her why she had loved him.

Peering down he spoke. "I know you and once you've given your heart away its for keeps." he says as he once again approaches her figure. He can smell the fear mixed with arousal in the air. "Don't think Bon, just feel." he said as he peppered kisses along her face. His hands began to wander as he dragged his lips over every bit of exposed amount of skin that was showing through her off the shoulder white shirt. "Don't listen to your head because it's telling you we're wrong- don't listen to heart because its still aching." he said as his had slid below the tiny jean shorts that had adorned her hips. "Listen to this." he says cupping her swiftly. An audibly gasp is soon heard and its music to his ears. His lips curve into a smile as he looks her way.

I let out a sudden gasp as his hand comes to rest on me. My mind goes to mush as he licks his lips seductively my way. "Damon...please" I say begging him not to do this. "Don't do this." I say again. Damon Salvatore had the power to break me, and he could break me if he wanted to, in fact I was sure he would try to break me because the only way he would ever have me again would be after he broke me down.

Bringing his fingers back up he cups her face. "I've always known what you wanted-your body wants this and so does your heart." he says passionately. "You just have to listen to it Bonnie." he finishes before going in for the kill and finally kissing her. The kiss had been something he had been missing, her lips were as soft as ever and her taste was something he could never grow tired of.

When the kiss ended I pushed him back as hard as I could. "That was the last time you will ever kiss me again Damon Salvatore." I said as anger once again flowed through my veins. The once blown out candles were suddenly lit again, as my emotions got the better of me. "Now get out of my house!" I said my voice even.

He tilted his head to one side, a ghost of smirk appearing on his lips. "I'm not giving up on us Bon." he says ready for the challenge that awaits him. This time he was going to get the girl at whatever the cost. ""I wont lose you...not ever again." he says placing a kiss to her cheek before breezing out of sight.

Only when I was alone did everything sink in. Damon had been acting on pure emotion and whenever he acted on emotion only he became unstable and unpredictable and that could be terrifying. And his speech about loving me had left me feeling unsettled. Never had Damon ever spoke so passionately to me, and it scared me because if he really believed what he was saying then my world was going to get turned upside down.

**a.n. 2 I hope the mason and bonnie scenes werent too much for you all. this chapter is a turning point for everyone and will lead us into the heart of the story, which is going to get tangled really soon.**


	6. Chapter 6

A.N. hey all! thanks for all that read and replied! I hope you like this chapter as well as you all liked the last.

xoxo

queena

_"My heartbeat beats me senselessly"_

**Chapter 6: Mr. And Ms. Mistake**

After my conversation with Damon I had felt emotionally drained from the games he was playing with my mind, by confessing he loved me then going as far as to bind my powers for his own personal gain...it had all been too much for me. I felt like I had gone to many rounds on the tea cup at Disneyland and now I was left spinning off till I tumbled over. I needed time and space away from everything that was plaguing my mind and that included Damon and his sudden confessions of love, Elena and quest to rekindle our friendship (yeah like that's gonna happen), and Stefan and his possible relapse (poor Stefan.) I felt like I was going crazy my body was buzzing with this energy that was similar to pent up aggression and I was afraid that if I didn't do something soon, I'd set either someone on fire, or jump someone bones, either way I needed an outlet or I'd go crazy.

So I did the one thing that I knew would take my mind off of the crap that had become my life, I went for a run. The familiar sounds of Britney Spears had always been something I had used to work out and it seemed to have done the trick because soon I was running down the familiar paths of the Mystic Falls National Park. Running had always taken my mind off of anything that had gone on in my life, it was a way to escape and relax without the constant glare of everything that involved the supernatural.

Thirty minutes later, Im half way through my second lap when I spot Mason Lockwood running like his life depended on it. From afar I watch as other women watch him and within a few moments I see the few women that are running on the trail suddenly trying their best to catch up to the most eligible bachelor in mystic Falls.

I turn around and nearly collide in Tyler as he's just stopped running. "Oh my god Tyler you nearly scared the shit out of me!" I say punching him in the shoulder.

"I thought you heard me. I was calling you for like five minutes." He says looking in the same direction as she had been earlier, but finding nothing as interesting as she had seen.

I cleared my throat feeling my face grow warm. Of course I didn't hear Tyler calling me. I was too busy checking out his uncle.

"So I heard about you and Damon." He says almost sheepishly. "Before you say anything, I want you to know that Caroline posted the news of your freedom on twitter." He said pausing. "I also know that you loved the guy and deeply, it had to be the reason you stayed with him because the guy is a supreme dick." He said a smirk on his lips. "And it takes one to know one."

I felt my body stiffen at the mention of him, Damon. I didn't want to think about him or talk about him because it was a waste of time. This was the man that had stalked me in my dreams, the same man who broke my heart and took my powers away from me. In short Damon had turned my world into a mess and what made things so much worst was the fact that now he claimed to love me which scared the shit out of me, because I had seen what he had done out of love and wanted no part of it.

Just as I was about to say something, I caught Tyler looking behind me and the sound of shuffling feet had caused me to turn around as well, and that was when I saw him. Mason Lockwood had just come from a run, sweat was dripping down his toned tan skin and he was coming our way. I bit my lip at the sight of the man that was coming our way. Mason Lockwood was pure man, everything about him was rugged and romance novel all in one.

"Now I see what's got you slacking off. It's the lull of a pretty girl." He says coming to a halt somewhere between Tyler and me. I have to bite my lip from saying hot damn, because hot damn. He was hot! And the mere sight of him sweaty and shirtless had mind reliving some of the things we had done together, which caused me face to get caught as he swiftly winked my way.

"Uncle Mason, you remember my friend Bonnie" Tyler called interrupting what Caroline would have said was pure eye sex between me and the older Lockwood.

As Tyler had continued to talk, Mason and I had continued to look at each other, the energy I felt from him the night before is still present and I can't help the small smile that comes to my lips, when I do see him. Before I knew it, Tyler was finished talking and had disappeared off in search of what I thought he said was a power bar.

Turning my attention back to Mason, I gave him a small smile. "Hey" I said for better lack of words. I felt so lame, here I was standing in front of a man who had seen me naked in the day and night time and the first words out of my mouth since our time together was hey. If I weren't in public, I would definitely put my palm to my forehead in shame.

"Hi" he said chuckling at how nervous she seemed. He hadn't expected to see her so soon, in fact he had been plotting ways he could "accidently on purpose" bump into her the moment she had returned home the night before. When he had gotten home, he could smell her everywhere, it made his senses go in overdrive as everything smelled of her. He had known the moment he had bedded the beautiful girl that he was probably in over his head, but he couldn't shake the sudden feeling that had overcome him the moment he had seen her. Just like he couldn't get the image of her beneath him, on top of him out of his mind. It was like she had branded him because in the days following all he could do was think of her, her skin, her mouth, her smile...everything that was her.

"Does this feel awkward to you?" I asked as we stood in front of each other. I felt a glimmer of excitement in the air the moment our eyes caught again and I wondered if he felt it too? Whenever I was close to Mason Lockwood I itched to get much closer to him, it was like a moth to a flame, I was drawn to him, the only problem was that I was unsure of whom was the moth or the flame for that matter.

'Not really," he says looking over at her with his arms crossed. "But it could be due to the fact that your standing in front of me nearly naked, and I can only imagine what we could do if you were really naked." He says wiggling his eyebrows as she giggles his way. He watches as her honey skin lights up with a faint blush. She bites her lips in that innocent way that tells him she has no idea what hold she has over the male population and before he knows it, he's invading her space. "Your killing me you know that- all that exposed skin, its sending me on overdrive." he rapt out, his voice coming out much huskier then he thought.

I raised a brow, all the while trying to ignore the way, his voice had suddenly gone husky. "Yeah and your standing in front of me shirtless, with low swung shorts." I reminded him while taking a cautious step back at the sound of cawing birds in the distance, tossing a look over my shoulder I spotted a black crow before turning my eyes back to Mason.

"Good to know I still have that effect on you." He says a smile playing on his lips

It was on the tip of my tongue to say that I could be indecisive about everything in my life but never would I be indecisive about Mason Lockwood. " What effect?" I asked resisting the urge walk over to him and kiss that smile right off of his face.

"You know," he says bringing his voice down to a husky whisper. "The one that has blushing like crazy or panting in desire." he says as his eyes drop down from her face to her lips.

I felt my face heat up with his words and smacked him playfully as he continued to laugh my way. "If I remember correctly I wasn't the only one panting in desire- or moaning in pleasure." I say winking in his direction. I say enjoying the back and forth. "Admit it, you loved every minute of it?" I say causing him to chuckle my way. Normally I was a bit more reserved with most people but Mason was different, I felt like we were on the same wave length.

He winks in her direction. "What can I say- your good, real good." he says fondly as he studies her carefully. Her eyes seem to light up at the mere mention of the two of them and he can't help but wonder if she had thought about it...like he had thought about it? Or was he alone in this haze he felt about her...about them. One night, with her was all it took to jumpstart his heart that had been running on empty for so long. The sight of her made him remember a song, girls like Bonnie Bennett had reminded him that he was lonely- and while in her presence he didn't feel so empty.

I shook my head playfully "You're not too bad yourself!" I reminded him which he gave me a smirk in response before speaking again. I noted that somehow I had managed to get closer to him, it was like a magnet was pulling me his way.

"I haven't seen you in a while, you avoiding me?" he asked seriously. He had thought of her constantly and itched to hear her voice. He had never been so utter surprised by the amount of chemistry he felt with one person, then he had been with Bonnie Bennett. Normally he had known that score with a normal hookup but Bonnie Bennett wasn't a normal hookup. With any other girl a one night stand would soothe him till he found something else to gain his attention, but with Bonnie she had left him wondering where he stood. Never in his life had a girl left him wanting more, till the day he had stumbled upon little Bonnie Bennett and now he was itching to touch her.

"Never" I say surprising myself as I take a bold move closer to him. I can hear my heart beat as its beating loud in my chest at the way he's looking at me. His hand comes out to touch me and it's like I'm taken back to the time we shared in his bedroom. I let out a small gasp as our eyes go wide and I know he's felt what I just felt. "Something came up." I say swallowing hard.

He nods his head in understanding and he's sure that the something that had come up, had something to do with Salvatore and the thought had burned him up. He couldn't think about her going back to the bastard that had broken her heart because he wanted to enjoy her company.

"By the sound of your voice, whatever has come up sounds stressful." He points out as she give him a weary look. He had a feeling that whatever was plaguing her had to do with her leach of an ex boyfriend, and he'd be damned if he'd let him take the sparkle out of her eyes that he had seen that night at Purgatory.

I let out a small chuckle. "You have no idea" I say deciding to leave it at that. I would love to talk to Mason about what was going on but I knew that we wouldn't get much talking done. In fact I could barley keep my mind out of the gutter now and we were in a public place. Good lord, I was slowly becoming Caroline. One taste and it was like I freaking addicted. Maybe this was the effect of Damon rubbing off on me, he always said I had an insane appetite.

"Well then your in luck, I have the perfect way of relieving you of stress." He says winking. " "That is, if you think you could handle it."

I bit back a grin and rolled my eyes his way. He was trying to bait me, to see how far he could push me. Lucky for him I was in a good mood and up for a game of cat and mouse. "Why don't you try me?" I say tilting my head to one side and giving him my most dazzling smiles.

"Come out with me tonight, I'll show you a good time." He says pausing at the look on her face. He could tell that she was trying to fight it, try to put him off but he could also see that she wanted this as much as he wanted it. They had fun together and why deprive themselves of a good time.

I shifted my weight from one foot to the other. It would be nice to get lost in Mason Lockwood, hell I had done it before and it was enjoyable but I couldn't hide away forever. I had real things I needed to deal with and I was positive if I went with Mason, I'd end up wrapped up in him and his sheets and never want to leave.

"You know I'm good for it." He says coxing her. He wanted to see if what he was feeling was a result of being high on good sex or if he really liked her. Jules had been lecturing him for days that what he was feeling was a result of screwing a witch, but he needed to know for himself if this was some sexual haze or if he really liked her.

I felt my smile falter. Never in a million years did I, ever think Mason Lockwood would give me the time of day and yet here he was asking me out on like a date, a real date, and I was nearly speechless. "Mason." I say hoping to stop whatever it is he is about to say. Sure I had liked, him, in fact I hadn't had that much fun in a long time, but the two of us together again..no matter how tempting it was- was probably a bad idea. Just as I'm about to speak he quickly interrupts me.

"I know you just got out of a relationship and you're not looking for anything serious . . . " he says pausing. "I'm not asking for anything serious, we can just hang out and see where it takes us." He says licking his suddenly dry lips. He couldn't let her go, not without at least one date. If she didn't feel the tug like he had felt, the tug that was pulling him to her right now, then he'd move on and take his loss like a man, but if she felt it then, well then they'd see how far they could go. In all honesty he wanted her, and he wouldn't stop till she gave him a chance.

I let out a little sound that was between a shriek and a pleased sigh. "It's not that." I say pushing my hair to one side. "I like you, a lot...I wouldn't have slept with you unless I didn't like you." I say pausing. "It's just...Damon..he's back." I blurt out causing his blue green eyes to turn a shade darker.

He clicks his tongue. "So are you two getting back together?" he questioned, his face a mask. He had called her for days and she hadn't returned his call yet so it was possible that she had gone back to Damon, after all he knew the pull of a vampire, he had gone back to Katherine many times.

"God no!" I say causing him to chuckle. "I just...Damon is unpredictable and I don't want you to have to deal with him because he's decided he's in love with me." I said as he reaches for my hand.

"I'm not scared of Damon." He says reaching for her hand.

"You should be, Damon is unpredictable." I say a bit fearful of the outcome of whatever it is that was between me and Mason. I liked being around him, and it was good because he made me smile and I felt like I hadn't smiled in a really long time, but at the same time it was bad because anything supernatural was dangerous.

"You don't have to worry about me, the only thing that could hurt me, is if you don't accept my invitation for tonight, I'll keel over and die right on the spot." He said while still holding onto my hand.

"Fine. I'll go out with you." I say giggling just as Tyler has suddenly returned.

The last thing I needed to do was get involved with Mason Lockwood, it was probably bad enough that I had slept with him, once...twice okay three times but going any further was just asking for trouble. Jules was right, if Damon found out that was spending my time with Mason he would flip and although I could give two flying fucks what he really thought about anything in my newly single life, I didn't want to drag Mason any further into vampire drama then he needed to be. But with him standing in front of me, so open and so honest and so incredibly sweet, I couldn't help but agree. After all I was a newly single girl and if I wanted to hang out with the opposite sex I could, the hell with Damon Salvatore.

**BB-DS-BD**

The last place I wanted to be was at the Salvatore manor, yet I found myself once again roaming the familiar home in search of my bestfriend, whom I feared was in need of help desperately. Quickly I push open the door only to see Damon drink in hand as he descended the staircase. I licked my lips and squared my shoulders as he soon stood in front of me. A ghost of a smile was on his lips as he looked my way and I had the sudden urge to get the hell out of dodge. It had occurred to me that we had been here before that I had stormed into the house looking for Stefan and what had come next had changed my world in a good and bad way. This time I was returning to the same place in hopes of helping my best friend and if that meant going toe to toe with the devil then so be it.

I don't need to say any words as even Damon knows the reason behind my sudden visit.

"He's not here." he says while swirling around his drink in hand. He had come home late last night the find that his newest chew toy had been drained and dismembered in his bedroom courtesy of "Ripper Stefan". He had spent most the night cleaning up the mess his brother had left for him, and when he was finally finished cleaning he had realized what his actions had really done to his brother and that was to drive him insane. His saintly brother had finally gone over the edge and he had been the one to bring knock him off his rocker. The thought should have made him happy, but knowing that Stefan was hanging on by a loose thread wasn't something he had fancied.

I squinted in his direction and pulled out my cell phone once again dialing the familiar number of my best friend, once again I got the voice mail and looked over to Damon who just shrugged his shoulders as if he hadn't had the care in the world.

"I was beginning to think you wouldn't show." he says fondly while fixing her a drink in which she let sit on the nearby table. "But then again, your not one to back down from a fight." he said a ghost of a smile forming on his lips. "Its one of the things that had attracted me to you." he says almost whimsically. It was true he had never seen anyone ready to jump into action like Bonnie Bennett. She was fearless and her kick ass mentality had always been a turn on for him. "Well that and the mere fact that you can hit the high c # 6 octave while in the throes of passion." he says turning round to see her as she gives him a steely glare that sent pleasurable chills down his spine. "Not many people appreciate the art of high notes like you do." he says about to continue when she speaks, thus stopping his rambling.

"Do me a favor Damon," I said with my eye trained on his as I glared his way. The last thing I wanted to hear was his lines of bullshit because unlike before a stunning smile and promise and a quickie would not change my stance on the subject of the two of us.

He quirked a grin. "Well take your clothes off and I'll gladly do you a favor." he says brazenly. "I'll lick you up and down till you say stop." he says flashing a toothy grin before making a show of licking his lips.

"Stop flirting with me." I say causing him to actually chuckle my way, while I stand ready for battle. I had known showing up at the manor meant, that I could run into him and after my chat with Mason, I was really ready to just move on. After all I had a best friend to console (poor Stefan) and a date to get ready for (yay me).

Walking over to her he stopped nearly an inch away as they locked eyes. "You used to like when I flirted with you- in fact you used to like when I did a lot of things to you." he said his voice turning husky. "Gimmie and few minutes and I'll gladly remind you." he says suavely.

I jammed my finger hard into his chest. "That was before you fucked my best friend." I said causing him to take a step back as the heat of my words nipped at his face like a fire breathing dragon.

He licked his lips weary of discussing Elena with Bonnie. He had hoped that she may have forgotten about his indiscretion but to no avail. Hadn't he proven that he cared by turning her house into something out of a freaking story book. He had to remember that this was Bonnie, and she was going to make him beg for it. "How about you take off your clothes and I'll kiss the hurt away." he manages to say before she picked up his favorite vase and threw it against the wall, signaling that she meant business. It was the tip of his tongue to remind her how sexy he thought she was when angry but resisted the urge to do so, they had plenty of time battle.

"Have you seen him?" I asked not bothering to continue any more back and forth with Damon. He was trying to use everything in his power to bait me, and unlike before I wouldn't let him goad me into a "hate kiss" as he did the first night we had gotten together. Nor would I let him get the pleasure of thinking I wanted him back because I didn't.

"Not since he tried to kill me." he said giving her a pointed look. "What made you change your mind and believe me?" he questioned watching as she walked around the living room. She was nervous he could tell because she was constantly moving and every time she moved he got a waft of her. She smelt clean and fresh with a hint of vanilla and cherry blossoms. If the sight of her had made his mouth water the smell had him nearly intoxicated by her scent.

I stopped pacing to look over at him. "I don't believe you, I'm just being cautious." I say before walking over to the nearby window to stare outside. The longer Stefan stayed away the more worried I got and if by any chance Damon was telling the truth and not trying to recruit me in order for the two of to be around each other and Stefan was really on a binge, I was afraid of what would really happen. "Unlike you I love your brother." I say while still looking out of the window. "And I don't want to see him hurt, I want to make sure he's safe and ok." I say finally turning round to see that Damon is staring at me a weird look on his face.

"He's high on human blood, I'm sure he fine." he quirked out amused by the sudden turn of events."He's probably out ripping apart some unsuspecting soccer man, or better yet a fiery red head who would fight back." he continued amused. Who knew after so many years of torment that he would cause Stefan to finally snap and turn back into "Ripper Stefan" no less. He was brought out of his meager thoughts when he noticed a fiery glare being direction his way. Damn she looked sexy when angry. Her eyes lit up like a Christmas tree.

"You think this is funny?" I asked sharply. It never seized to amaze me how little Damon cared about anyone who wasn't Elena and or her panties. You would think because Stefan was his brother he wouldn't do things to harm him but that was not the fact. "Your brother is hurting and you think it's a joke?" I asked storming my way over to him, disappointment evident in my voice. Stefan was hurt and he needed someone and I could only hope that he would let me be that person. In all the times we had spoken about Damon and Elena never had he uttered his feelings and I wished he would speak to me about it, because I knew what he was going through. I also knew that topic of Elena was something that we hadn't delve into but maybe if I tried a little harder we could get through this together.

Sensing her sudden guilt he spoke up, his voice no longer taking on the playful tone as it had earlier. "It's not your fault you know." he says coming to stop inches away from her. Glacier eyes meet green as he speaks for the first time from the heart. "Stefan was going to do whatever he wanted to do and even you couldn't stop him." he says honestly, resisting the urge to further console her. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and tell her that everything would be okay, that the Stefan they both loved would reemerge champion but that may not be the case.

My angry eyes shot up his way."Your damn right this isn't my fault, if Stefan is back on human blood then the blame falls solely on you and your need to take away something from your brother to avenge Katherine." I said with a eye roll. "And Elena and her need to not only be the center of attention but to get everything she wants."

"Don't you think I know that!" he snapped back at her while gripping her arm tightly. He didn't need anyone to remind him of what he had done to her...to his brother...it was all he had thought about. He was aware that most people who knew him, thought he was cold and calculated and that may have been true but he had a heart it may not be beating, but it was still his heart. Just because he didn't wear his heart or his conscious on his sleeve, didn't mean he didn't suffer through times of guilt.

His words had caused me to stop any rant that was sure to fly out of my mouth. It wasn't often that Damon had admitted to being wrong and this was as close at admittance to wrong doing then I had ever heard on his part. It told me that despite everything, that Damon had loved Stefan just like Stefan had loved Damon. For as long as I had known the Salvatore brothers I had rarely seen the two of them bond. In fact other then saving each other from potential death, Damon nor Stefan had admitted loving each other. I could even go as far as to say that the Salvatore brothers rarely showed any signs of a functioning relationship.

"Are..are you saying that you regret what you did to your brother." I asked somehow floating closer to him. I tried to act as if his words wouldn't change a thing, but I knew that it would melt my heart just a tiny bit to know that he could feel..at least for Stefan. Despite how I felt about Damon in this moment, I knew he had heart, it was just buried behind so much anger, hurt and resentment and if loving Stefan could bring out the tiny bit of good that may be in him, then maybe, just maybe he and Stefan could be brothers again with time.

He reached out and touched her and surprisingly she hadn't reared back. "I don't have many regrets.' he say pausing as she looks at him expectantly, and its then that he sees that hope in her eyes, she wants him to be the man she had always wanted him to be and he too wishes that-that could come true. "I don't do regrets, its pointless, but if I did regret something...anything it would be hurting you and Stefan"

His words sounded so sincere and I wanted to believe but I had been down this road with him before and it had always led me to heartache. I didn't believe in Damon anymore and most importantly I didn't want to believe in him anymore. The only thing I wanted from Damon, was to help me find Stefan and otherwise we could go our separate ways and both move on with our lives. Our eyes locked together and just as I'm about to tell him exactly what I think of his apology his cell phone rings interrupting the two of us. The familiar tone told me Elena was calling and just like that the spell was broken. Rolling my eyes I took another step back just as the door swung open revealing Stefan. Immediately I rushed into his arms.

"What's going on here?" Stefan asks while hugging onto his bestfriend. He had to admit, he was surprised to see her. He had expected to come home to an empty house so he could sleep off his night but that had changed the moment he noticed his older brother had dared to return.

"Nothing." I say bringing my hand up to cup his face bringing his attention back my way. "I was worried about you." I say simply. "Don't ever scare me again." I say causing him to chuckle, before his nuzzles my nose.

"I'm the worrier Bons, you're the cool calm and collected one." Stefan says while I roll my eyes his way.

Having heard enough of the Stefan/ Bonnie love-fest he drains the rest of his drink and strolls closer to the twosome before getting a waft of his brooding brother. A smile comes to his lips as he looks at Stefan yet again. "Whew brother, you reek of booze, blood and Katherine." he said causing his younger brother to glare his way. He sent his own glare in the direction of Stefan that was for destroying his chew toy, payback was a bitch!

Not missing a beat Stefan spoke, with his arm still wrapped around me affectionately. "And you reek of what's left of your newest toy, desperation, and inadequacy" Stefan grinned at Damon. "tell me did you get the message I left for you?"

My eyes shot up as looked between the two before I met the gaze of blue eyes that were now lit up like the flame of a fire and before I had a chance to even question the look on either of the faces of the Salvatore brothers I was pushed aside like a rag doll. I watched in horror as the two brothers squared off, while walking around in a circle like true animals ready for a fight. Quickly I jumped into action hoping to delay an inevitable fight. I may have been hurt by Damon, hell I may have never wanted to see his face again but the last thing I wanted to see was him physically hurt and that went he same for Stefan. In all Damon and Stefan were brothers and they were part of my family and I didn't want to see them fighting.

"Don't" I say using magic to appear in front of the two.

"Bons, get out of my way I'm going to rip his heart out."

"And I'm going to slice and dice you till you are nothing but a bad memory"

"Stop it" I say holding my hand out so that I'm touching their chest to hold them back. "You're brothers.." I say looking from Damon to Stefan.

"We stopped being brothers a long time ago" Damon lashed out. "I carried you for years but really I just wanted make you pay for taking Katherine." Damon says menacingly.

"Damon" I say looking at him with hard eyes.

"He's right, I was just to blind to see it." Stefan calls causing my heart to ache. "I should have never tried to save you...you destroy everything you touch.. Just like you tried to destroy Bonnie." Stefan seethes says causing Damon's blue eyes to bleed black. "I always knew you werent good enough for her...and now everyone knows." Stefan says his voice devoid of emotion.

"Stefan!" I say shocked by his sudden outburst. My attention had soon turned to Damon who was laughing almost hysterically, and really I didn't know what to think of it.

"You know what's so funny, is that I may have never been good enough for Bonnie, but I sure as hell was good enough for your girlfriend...ex girlfriend, she couldn't wait to wrap her mouth around my dick." he says chuckling at the hurt look on his younger brothers face. "She was begging for it, itching for it and I gave her what she wanted." he said going in for the kill. As always he had won Stefan had gone mad instantly and once again Bonnie had stepped in. It was only then that his word had registered. He had been so caught up in hurting Stefan for hurting him, that he forget about hurting Bonnie.

"Why don't you go shower and we'll talk when your finished." I pleaded with the younger Salvatore. This was a side I had never seen of Stefan and it told me that Damon had been telling the truth and Stefan had fallen off the wagon, which meant he needed me and I needed to be their for him- because that was what friends were for.

Silently I watched as Stefan trailed up the stairs and only when I was sure he had actually gone to take a shower did I turn to look at Damon. "I think you should go." I say causing Damon to let out a puff of air. I could see the anger on his face by the harsh words Stefan had said, but really Damon deserved it, and in the end Damon had won just like always.

Crossing his arms over his chest he gazed at her intently. Of course she would side with Stefan, it was always about Stefan. "You do realize this is my house!" he ranted.

"Fine!" I say throwing my hands up in the air. I didn't want to breathe the same air as Damon anyway. I would wait for Stefan upstairs and try and forget hearing Damon graphically detailing his night with Elena.

"Wait Bon," he says taking hold of her elbow. "What I said..."

"It doesn't matter." I say finally meeting his blue eyes. "I already knew you two were together, I walked in on it." I say pausing as the memory replays in mind. "I'm not here to fight with you or to even talk to you...I'm here for Stefan," I say pausing. ""He wont talk to me with you here, so." I trailed off hoping he would get the hint and surprisingly he did so.

"Anything for you." he said placing a kiss to her temple before disappearing.

**BB-SS-BS**

I found myself sitting by the massive lake in the backyard when suddenly Stefan was sitting beside me a bottle of whisky in his hands. I gave him a peculiar look as he shrugged his shoulders and sat next to me, I guess we both needed something strong after that outburst. I had told myself that Damon couldn't hurt me anymore because I was over him, and over it but hearing him bring up his escapades with Elena had made me want to throw up because he didn't care about my feelings or Stefans, he just wanted to win and that was why we would have never worked out in the long run. Damon and I were two different people.

"How are you?" Stefan ask after a moment of silence.

"I'm fine." I say looking over to him. I didn't want to talk about me and my issues with Damon, I wanted to talk about Stefan and his issues with his brother and anything else that was going on in his life. "How are you-honestly?" I ask causing him give me a small smile.

"Honestly not too good." he says for the first time out loud. "I'm dealing with it."

"By sleeping with Katherine?" I asked causing him to let out a groan. I could tell by the look on his face that he was mildly annoyed but as his friend I needed to call him on his shit.

"It's complicated." he says rubbing his neck. He wanted to delve further into detail but really it didn't have much to say. He had gone out one night and Katherine had shown up out of nowhere, they traded jabs and the next thing he knew, she had pushed him against the tree and he had dipped his fingers inside of her. He had one taste and within a blink of an eye they had traded position with him pushing her against the tree while she rode him hard and fast.

I nod my head because I knew all to well about complications. I could still remember the day I had told Stefan about sleeping with Damon, that hadn't gone well. He had warned me and if I had listen to him then we wouldn't be here now. And to add to the complication I had just hooked up with Mason Lockwood, so complicated was now my new favorite word.

"Stefan, you know that I love you and I just want you to know I'm here for you." I say scooting closer to him. "So if you're going through anything and I mean anything." I say as our green eyes meet. "You can tell me."

He clicked his tongue. "I tried to be someone that I'm not, to be someone that she would want and all it ever did was cause me pain." he says fiercely. "I would have done anything for her, I loved her that much..." he says pausing. "Now I have a clear head and I know who I am and what I am, I'm honest with myself and the pain I felt before- it'll never hurt like that again."

"Is that why you've gone back on human blood." I asked him as he gave me a peculiar look.

"How'd you know, let me guess Damon went running to you."

I swallowed hard. "Yes, but your eyes they are greener now, brighter and I guess that has to do with the blood, or maybe its Katherine." I say only to get silence. We sit together for a few more moments before I ask again about Katherine. I couldn't imagine the two of them together, he had hated her for so long, hell he even blamed her for his breakup with Elena and now he was shacking up with her. "She looks just like Elena, or Elena looks just like her." I say not expecting to get a reaction out of him and his sips out of the bottle before passing it my way.

"Despite all of her bad qualitites the one thing that Katherine has always been is honest in what she wants...and what she wants is me and right now she's what I want."

I put the bottle down and looked his way. "Stefan."

"Its just sex Bon, besides your one to talk." he says playfully my way.

I let out a gasp and shove him playfully. "Really your going to bring up him." I say pushing at him again.

"I'm not talking about him, I'm talking about Mason Lockwood." he says grinning my way.

I was at a loss of words and used magic to push him into the pound. "Have you been spying on me" I asked standing over him, while he laughed in my face and before I knew it Stefan had yanked me into the pond causing me to yelp as I tumbled onto him.

"Relax, I was in the park this morning, and I heard you and Mason talking, so you had sex with Mason Lockwood" he grinned

"Stefan!" I said looking down disgusted. "You jerk." I said splashing him with the disgusting water of the pound.

He laughed and splashed me back, causing me to do the same to him. We were so caught up in the moment that we hadn't realized that Katherine had appeared out of thin air, a smirk on her lips as she watched the two of us.

"You know, the two of you are what dreams are made of- both wet and ready for the taking." she said while standing on the bank with her hands on her hips. "What do you say the three of us play a little three way." she said winking at the two of us.

I frowned in her direction before looking to Stefan who had submerged himself under the water.

"What do you say Bonnie?" Katherine purred. "We can always put on a show and let Stefan watch- he always did like to watch." she purrs just as Stefan had popped his head out of the water.

I looked to Stefan who was staring at Katherine and Katherine who was staring at Stefan, that was my cue to go, the last thing I wanted etched in my memory was of the two of them going at it.

"Well on that note, I have a date to get ready for." I said although it falls on deaf ears.

"the offer is still open, anytime." Katherine says and to my astonishment, Stefan kind of smirks.

Its then that I realize today is one of those days that goes in the history books as one of the weirdest days ever and what made it even weirder was the mere fact that I could totally get behind and Stefan and Katherine potential romance as long as she kept the raging psychotic bitch tendencies at bay.

**DS-DS-DS**

**Damon**

After his confrontation with his ripper Stefan and Bonnie, Damon had found himself narrowing down the road fast in his car. He needed to get away from the two of them, well mainly Stefan. His brother had dared to remind him that he of course wasn't good enough for Bonnie Bennett. He didn't need to be told, he had already known that Bonnie was way better then him and he had been lucky to have her as long as he did. And what had really got him was that Stefan had baited him to say things he knew would hurt bonnie so that his point was proven. It was a bitch move but it was affective.

He could still hear the threat his brother had sent his way, daringly in front of Bonnie. His brother had been lucky that he looked like hell and that he had decided to play nice, well sort of nice especially since Bonnie had thought the world of Stefan. "Did you get the you get the message?" enormous forehead and said a snarl on his lip as he dared to step to him. That was such a bitch move, Lea was his chew toy- his continuous supply of blood and Stefan had taken what he was his like a snotty nosed brat. Just thinking about the smug look on his younger brothers face pissed him off all over again. He hated messes and Stefan had destroyed his antique lap and Persian rug. He had almost forgotten what a dick ripper Stefan could be-it almost made him long for brooding Stefan, because he could at least make fun of brooding Stefan.

He was soon brought out of his musing by none other then Elena Gilbert. When she finally emerged into the living room his breath caught in his throat at the mere sight of her, she was still Elena Gilbert after all and he still thought she was beautiful as ever. However you could tell that the last couple of days, their actions and the repercussions of it had taken a toll on her. Her normally dancing chocolate orbs were no longer dancing, instead she looked like someone who was dealing with guilt and he knew all about that. He also knew that the rejection of Bonnie and Stefan had cut like a knife laced in vervain for him, so he was sure it hurt like a cut of a knife to her as well. They deserved to be outcast, they deserved the rejection but that didn't mean they felt nothing.

"I'm actually a little surprised that you called." she said while pulling on her jacket. "Especially after the way we left things." she said slowly.

Licking his lips he spoke. "About that..." he said pausing to finish off his whiskey. "I'm sorry, it wasn't just on you-it was me to." he said pausing yet again to find his words. "We're both to blame for what happened." he said deciding to leave it at that. They had both did what the did, in the beginning, the first time it was a blur, the second time she had wanted to forget the pain they had caused their family, and he...he wanted to stop thinking and just feel-which was ironic because that was what he had always told Bonnie when they were together and yet when he was with Elena he had tried to do the same thing and it hadn't worked if anything it had made him feel worst.

_Flashback_

_It was over, for good this time, Bonnie had left him and he didn't know how to feel about it, or how to deal with it. If anyone had told him years ago that he would have been a drunken mess of a judgmental witch, he would have laughed in their face and then drained them dry yet here he was today- a drunken mess with red rimmed eyes from fucking crying. He wanted to hurt someone, because he was in pain, never did he think her rejection would hurt so much._

_He felt hallow and it was much different from losing Katherine to Stefan- though he had loved Katherine for so long, deep down he had always known the truth he had just chosen to ignore it. It was also different from Elena choosing Stefan because he knew that she could always change her mind. She may have not wanted him in this instant but they had shared something tonight and one day she would wake up and realize that she had feelings for him- that was what he had always told himself as she rejected him._

_And then their was Bonnie, the pain he had felt from her had made his insides churn. He wondered briefly if she had done a spell on him because he could feel everything she felt and it was like he was being burned alive. She didn't want him, she had said so- emerald green eyes were bright as she had spoke with precision. She had said that he kind of love was not what she wanted...not from him...not anymore and that had stung. Looking back he could easily see that she could have been his savings grace hadn't he burned her heart to stone._

_Slamming the door shut to the manor he stopped abruptly stopping at the sight of Elena Gilbert sitting on the plush sofa while the fire was roaring. Silent tears were falling down her face and for the first time ever, he didn't really give a damn. She had gotten the ball rolling tonight, she had come to him with her allure and now look where it had gotten them._

_"Stefan- he's so hurt and Bonnie she hates me." what am I going to do, I need them." she cried desperately. "Damon you have to help me...I cant loose them." she said while tugging at him._

_"Too late Elena." He said unwrapping her hands from around him. "We've already lost them." he said giving her a wide eyed look as he poured himself a drink. He needed something to take his mind off of his recent failure and alcohol was going to do it._

_"You should have never kissed me." she said with sudden disgust as she wiped her lips._

_He spun around at her words, of course she would blame all of this on him. He was after all the man that had chased her from the moment they had met, in an attempt to steal something from his brother and the fact that she had kissed him back was a none issue because he was bad and she would always be good. "You should have never fucking kissed me back!" he growled out._

_"I was tipsy." she said meekly_

_He let out a snort she wasn't that fucking drunk. "You were fine when you were climbing on top of me." he reminded as he inched closer to her. "You were fine when we rushed to take our clothes off, - and you didn't have a problem with fucking me...oh wait trying to fuck me in a bed I shared with your best friend._

_"Stop it!" she seethed while reaching back and slapping him across the face._

_He wasn't surprised when she slapped him hard across the face. He grinned her way knowing that the truth hurt her just like it had hurt him. Misery had loved company. "One look from you, one touch, one kiss and suddenly Im bending for you- doing everything I can possibly think to please you- and just like the snap of the fingers what I've been building for the last year and half is gone." he snapped back. "And you know the funny thing about it- is it wasn't even worth it." he says wiggling his eyebrows as he looked pointedly her way. "I lost my girlfriend and my brother."_

_Her brown eyes got wide as she looked his way. "And I lost my boyfriend and best-friend..your not the only one hurting."_

_He let out a chuckle and tilted his head to the side as he eyed her. "Tell me would you have veer chosen me over Stefan, or were you just planning on screwing me in secret and then going back to Stefan like nothing ever happened?" He questioned._

_"Damon" she said while licking her lips. Tentatively she took a step forward and touched his arm and that was when their eyes met._

_"Carful Elena, the last time you looked at me like that I had you spread before me naked." he said a smirk on his lips. "You should run along- because I'm feeling reckless and we've already blown our life apart- you never know what could happen next."_

_She quickly turned on her heel before suddenly changing her mind and kissing him again. He was right they had already ruined everything, they had nothing left but each other. "Make me forget, Damon-please...please take the pain away." she begged, before they were all over each other._

_He had always thought the day that Elena Gilbert begged for it, would be the best day of his life. But now as she reached for his pants, and begged for him to take her, he didnt see it as a good thing. She was desperate to feel anything but what they were feeling now-and he would have loved to save her, but saving Elena Gilbert from her guilt meant adding to his own."_

_Despite himself he ran his hands through her hair and kissed her hard, on the lips. As he kissed her emerald eyes peeked behind his eyelids and that was when he snapped out of it. Quickly he pushed the doe eyed girl away from him, disgust evident on his face. " you ruined everything. I hate you- get out." he said causing the brunette to fled the sound of her sobs ringing in his ears._

_End of flashback_

She bit her lip and nodded her head. "For what it's worth- you were right about a lot of things you said that night. I wanted you- I had always wanted you and maybe in my own way I had encouraged you to chase after me because I had wanted you and I wanted Stefan." she said pausing. "I never wanted to become Katherine but I did, and it was my own selfish actions that had cost us both Stefan and Bonnie.." she said honestly. After her last fight with Bonnie she had taken a long look in the mirror and realized that everything that Bonnie had said, had been right- she had wanted it all and now she was paying for wanting it all.

"Elena." he called only for her to continue talking.

"No listen. If I don't say this I'll never get it out and it'll always haunt us. I lost of my bestfriend because I couldn't be honest with myself, with Stefan or with you so I'm going to be honest." she said taking a deep breath. "I did want you Damon, you weren't wrong about my feelings for you...I just wanted Stefan more."

He nods his head in understanding. If this had been before he may have called her on her shit, but they had bigger problems then the two of them. Stefan had not only fallen off the wagon but he was shacking up with Katherine, and Bonnie, well their was something off about her today- she seemed more over him then usual and that meant she had found someone else to occupy her time and he wasn't having it. He and Elena were going to brainstorm a way to get back the people they loved before everything went to shit.

A.N. 2: well i hope you all liked it i had so much fun writing this chapter. the next chapter will be out much sooner because im halfway through it and maybe a bit shorter.

**spoilers**: Damon comes face to face with the one thing he's feared the most, Bonnie and Mason make a bold move, and Stefan and Katherine find a balance. **More to come**: A Lockwood party brings out unresolved feelings, for our exes and shapes the future our newest couples


	7. Chapter 7

A.N. hey all! I'm back with another chapter! thanks to everyone who reviewed to this chapter and the last, i'm sending hugs all around.

xoxo

queena

_"Loving you has to be the hardest thing to do, all my lies are true when I'm loving you"_ Duffy

**Chapter 7:** **Trust Issues**

First dates were awkward. They were often filled with a lapse in conversation, also known as the dreaded sound of silence. Most people of first dates were a mess, we all tried to play the part of cool and calm but really we were all nervous wreck.

Luckily for me, I didn't seem to have that problem with mason. With Mason I felt at ease and instead of spending most of my night praying that the night wouldn't be awkward I felt a surge of excitement as I thought of th possibilities. After all this was the same guy I had harbored a crush on for so many years and yet here we were and he wanted to go out with me. When I was with Mason, I felt like nothing could touch me, it was like I was in my own bubble and even though some may say I was running away from my problems, in reality I was just trying to move on, and what better way then be in the company of Mason. So when he asked me out again, I had said yes and I was quite sure that if he asked me to go home with him again, I would do that too because their was something about him...something that went far beyond his attractive looks that had me tongue tied.

Our date had consisted of going to the Mystic Park along with so many others to catch a movie in a park. We had settled amongst many of the towns people as the Friday Night horror night movie appeared on the screen. Tonight the horror flick "Scream" was playing while couples sat on thick blankets huddled together watching as the masked killer ran about chasing after the unsuspecting girl who was actually kicking ass.

"Are you cold?" Mason asks while he wraps the blanket around me. If I had known that we were going to be spending our date outside I would have dressed a bit more warmer. Instead I had tried the Caroline route which meant you showed as much skin as possible but not too much because that had made men think of sex. Tonight I had decided to wear a pastel flutter top and dark denim jeans while popcorn yellow wedges adorned my feet.

"No" I say shaking my head. "I feel good." I say lying back into his chest, he was warm and comfortable. We are sitting my back in his chest. To the left of me I can see that people are beginning to gawk at probably Mason, because he was the most eligible bachelor in Mystic Falls and the fact that he was with me, probably knocked a couple people of their feet.

"You smell good to!" he says taking a risk and laying a kiss to the side of her neck. As he had suspected she had turned completely to look at him, her green eyes dancing with mischief. His eyes had dropped down to her heart shaped lips and he let out a tiny groan at the thought of what could have happen had they been alone. "And you taste like candy." he remarked causing her to roll those beautiful green orbs.

"Candy?" I asked with a brow raised.

"Yep" he says grinning again displaying white teeth. "And I've got a thing for sweets- just can't get enough." he says knowing the double meaning is not lost on her because of the blush that creeps to her face. And it's then that he also notices that people around are starting to gawk. It appears she noticed to because suddenly she goes rigid in his arms.

"How long do you think it'll take before we're the town gossip?" I ask moving away from his warm body.

He pretended to think for a moment. "Give or take five or ten minutes." he says looking around as he makes eye contact with his good friend Jules who shakes her head in disapproval. "How about we blow this popstand."

Now it was my turn to grin. I had no need or use of being the towns gossip. "I think you're on to something." I say winking his way.

**...** BM **...**

"You can thank me now." he said noticing that she was smiling again as she dipped her spoon into the ice cream that was presented in front of her. All through out dinner he had been watching her, listening to her and he couldn't get enough. He had never been more fascinated by seeing a woman eat then watching her. He had noticed that while Bonnie ate her food she thoroughly enjoyed it, savoring every morsel as if she were a chef who was trying to figure out the ingredients.

"Thank you." I say finally placing my spoon down. We had spent the latter part of our date talking the night away and to top it off, for desert I had the pleasure of ordering a hot fudge cake and vanilla ice cream which was my favorite. Mason was good distraction and being around him, it made me not think about things that were out of my control. Stefan was back on human blood and screwing Katherine, and really I wanted to tell him to stay as far away from her as possible, but Katherine was giving Stefan something he needed right now and despite the fact that I still that she was well, vile at least I knew that when he was with her, he wasn't thinking about Elena.

"Now how are you going to repay me?" he asked brow quirked.

I tried to bite back a grin at his words. "Hmm, How would you like me top repay you?" I say dramatically while batting my eyelashes his way. I watched as his eyes danced with amusement and maybe even something akin to desire. This was what I had been missing, I had been missing having fun and living life! For so long I had been tied down by so many things but when I was with Mason, I felt free as a bird.

He grinned again. "I've got a few ideas." he says suggestively . All night he had been trying to figure out what exactly it was about the girl sitting in front of him that had made him so corny but as the night progressed he realized he didn't care all that much. He hadn't been this interested in a girl in a long time and if he was in a haze because of the teenaged witch in front of him, then so be it.

I raised my own eyebrow up at him almost challenging while I watched him watch me as I dipped my spoon into the hot fudge. I had promised myself that I would pace myself with Mason, that I would take things with him as they had come up and I was still going to do that, but I would do it with a bit of moderation. I was always up for a challenge it made things so much more interesting.

I clicked my tongue. " I've got some ideas of my own." I say motioning for him to move closer. Soon our lips were dancing together and before I know it, he's pulled me closer to him, closer then we had been in the booth. I can feel the heat rushing to my body as our tongues come into play and my hands have found its way into his curly hair. Before things could go any further I pulled away from him. "Thanks." I say as he catches his breath.

"You're gonna be the death of me." he says before drinking the rest of his drink.

I tilted to my side and looked his way before scooping up more ice cream. "Yeah- but I'm willing to bet you'll be along for the ride." I say causing him to chuckle.

He looks her way, as their eyes meet. "You bet your clothes off." he says picking up his spoon and taking a piece of her chocolate cake before winking.

**...**

**Meanwhile**

Damon Salvatore had strolled to his seat with Elena Gilbert, with only one thing on his mind, and that was his super top secret mission. The plan had been to use Elena, in order to get his dear strung out brother to forgive her, in the process of Stefan forgiving Elena for the "incident" Bonnie would see that Stefan was much happier and would do the same. In his mind Bonnie would see that Stefan in all of his saintly glory had forgiven Elena for her tryst and would do the same and then he and Bonnie could go back to being Bonnie and Damon and enjoy every minute of make up sex. He had learned his lesson when Katherine of all people pointed out what had been in front of his face for so long. The love he had been looking for in Elena, had been right in front of his face with Bonnie.

He had decided on this place, which was somewhere he wouldn't think anyone they knew would dare come to because, it wasn't the Grill. He had wanted to keep a low key profile for this mission, because all he needed was to run into vampire Barbie who would probably start bitching at him, Stefan who might go ape-shit and Bonnie...well if she had ever seen him with Elena again the chances of getting her back sooner rather then later would dwindle down to slim to none.

"What are we doing here Damon?" Elena asks while trying to keep her voice calm. The truth was that she was kind of afraid to me alone not because of what he might do, but because of what they might do together.

"We're here on a super secret mission." he says nodding to the waitress who brings him a cold beer. "We need to figure out a way to get Bonnie and Stefan back before they do something really stupid like move on with other people or worst..." he says shuddering. "Or move on together."

She licked her suddenly dry lips that idea of Bonnie and Stefan together was so absurd but then again she had seen her once best friend do a lot of things that were so unlike her. Leaving Purgatory with Mason Lockwood had stuck out like neon light would in the dark. She still couldn't wrap her mind around that situation. "Bonnie would never hook up with Stefan and Stefan would never hook up with Bonnie." she says more to herself then to him.

He rolled his blue eyes. "Please, you've seen them together they have this connection.. its only a matter of time before one of them starts feeling something for the other." he says noticing his tactic is starting to work. Elena wears her emotions all over her face and despite the fact that she is sure that Stefan will forgive her in time, he knows she doesn't like the thought of Stefan and Bonnie together. Step 1 of his plan has already gotten checked off his list.

She let out a long sigh. "If it does happen who are we to talk after what we've done?"

He mentally cursed. He hadn't expected her to go all noble on him. "We are trying to save them from themselves." he says cooly. "We don't want them feeling like we do...guilty and everything.." he says trailing off not bothering to go into detail. He was sure they felt differently but at the end of the day, they wouldn't wish this feeling on anyone let alone the people they loved.

"Ok." she says leaning forward. "I'm interested. What's the plan." she asks just as he suddenly starts to look around. "Damon, what's wrong? What is it? She asked suddenly alarmed. Things had been calm in the sense of supernatural and now was not a good time for all hell to break loose because really she wasn't sure if anyone would survive.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." Damon shot while Elena was still talking about god knows what. He heard her let out a shaky gasp at his sudden response while an elderly woman had tilted her nose up at him. He let out a scuff grandma could kiss his ass, because all he could see was Bonnie, his bonnie wrapped up in the embrace of none other then Mason fucking Lockwood. He had always known that Mason wanted Bonnie and the fucker had waited till the moment when he could whisk her away. Today was not that day. Without much of a word he stomped over to the couple who were too busy sharing a lip lock to notice. Vaguely he heard Elena following after him, her footsteps echoed in his ears as if they were far away.

Without much of a word he managed to tap Mason on his shoulder and before anyone could blink he punched him square in the jaw hoping to ruin his pretty boy looks. His blue eyes quickly met with green eyes who were both alarmed and angry as she held onto the wolfs hand. The sight was nearly enough to make him want to vomit.

"What the hell Damon?" I screeched outraged by his sudden appearance and attack on Mason. Who the hell did he think he was? I had never once stood for Damon pulling his random jackass moments when we were together and I'd rather rot in hell then to do it now.

"Sorry" he said shrugging his shoulders. "It's a reflex when I see a guy who's trying to have sex with my girlfriend." He nearly screamed outraged by the scene in front of him. Bonnie had looked way too cozy with Mason and that had made his stomach churn. He knew she was pissed at him...hurt even but to stoop so low as to dry hump Mason Lockwood in public for all to see was a bit much. " He couldn't keep his fucking hands off of you, so I put my hands on him." he says as his eyes her hard and cold.

I glared in his direction and noticed that Elena of course was off to the side as if she and Damon were on their own little date. I rolled my eyes at their behavior, Stefan was barley hanging on by a thread and yet they were already making a statement together. "I am not your girlfriend anymore." I gritted out while resisting the urge to stomp my foot and smack the hell out of him.

He sucked his teeth. "That's semantics, you know what I mean. Besides," he said scratching his head. "You never really broke up with me, you just walked away from the situation." he pointed out earning yet another glare. He was sure if her eyes were lasers he would be a burnt crisp.

I couldn't help the bubble of laughter that had escaped my mouth if he wanted official I could give him official. "Fine" I said tossing my hair over my shoulder. "Damon its over between us, in fact its probably been over for a very long time I just never wanted to admit it, but the last nail in the coffin was finding you and your skank.' I said looking over to Elena who was now staring at her shoes. "Together." I gritted out with a smile on my face.

To my left I noticed that Mason had cracked his neck and it looked like he was ready for war. Instinctively I reached out and put my hand on his arm and we looked at each other our eyes, and no words had to be spoken. "How about we get out of here?" Mason says and I nod my head agreeing with him. I would not let Damon ruin my night and I really wanted to give Mason some ice for his jaw. I knew he was supernatural and that he was stronger then the average man, but he still got punched by a vampire with super strength and it was my fault, so I should be the one to take care of him.

I look over to Mason as a genuine smile appears on my lips. This why I liked Mason, he wasn't like Damon, he was so much better. "Your full of good ideas tonight Mr. Lockwood." I say raising my eyebrows. "And I cant wait to see what else you have in store." I say truthfully. From the corner of my eye I spot a seething Damon who thinks everything is for him and about him- but for the first time in a long time, nothing I do has to do with him. "Lets get out of here." I finally say.

"The hell you are." Damon shot out his voice rising with every word. He should have seen this coming. The moment she had walked into the manor he had known something was different about her, he had even known the night he had returned that something was off, but he couldn't for the life of him figure it out and now it all clicked. Mason had gotten to her, he had gotten under her skin and was using the fact that she was pissed at him to try and seduce her. Well no fucking way. "If you think I'm just gonna let you walk out of here with a man who just dry humped you, like a dog." he said his blue eyes going wide as he looked at Bonnie and then Mason, before settling back on Bonnie. "Then you don't know me at all." he says reaching out to grab one of her hands.

Mason glare and growled lowly gaining a chuckle from the blue eyed vamp. "I know you, and I know what you did to her..." Mason said looking between the devil and the girl with Katherines face. "I know what both of you did to her and you are just pissed because she doesn't want you anymore."

"Damon... people are starting to stare." Elena says wearily as she looks around to see that some people are starting to stare at the four of them.

He let out a chuckle as he saw the disdain in the green orbs he was staring at. "Are you fucking him?" he asked his voice rising yet again. "Tell me the truth!" he demanded snatching a plate off of the table and breaking it so that everyone that was near them would look. All eyes were on the four of them and that was the way he liked it. If they were going down, they were going down in flames together.

"Stop it." I said through gritted teeth. I hated the fact that Damon was so dramatic, he had always made things so much more worst then what they were, he blew things out of proportion and now he had made a scene causing everyone to look at us like we were some soap opera. I wasn't a fan of being a walking talking sideshow for the people of Mystic Falls to gossip about. "You're making a scene." I say feeling my face heat up with a blush. The fact that I was sleeping with mason, was not the business of anyone but mine and Mason's and the people we chose to share with.

"If you want a scene Bonnie, I can make a scene-don't tempt me." he says darkly. He rubbed his fingers together as anger rushed through him, he was running on pure emotion and nothing had ever come good of that.

I suck my teeth really in no mood to continue on with this train wreck. Normally I would not stand for this, if Damon hadn't bound my powers I would have set him a flame but that probably would have turned him on, so I did the only thing I could do and that was to walk away. If Damon wanted to know if I were sleeping with Mason then I'd tell him, but not in front of the whole restaurant. "You already know the truth." I say simply. "It's the reason your so angry." I admit not bothering to elaborate before I head for the door with three other people following close behind.

He had never been so angry in his life and that was why he was laughing, it was either laugh or hurt and really he wasn't going to show anyone how much seeing Bonnie and Mason together... had hurt him. She wasn't supposed to get over him so quickly, she was supposed to pine away for him for a bit and then he'd swoop in and make everything better for the two of them. "NO" he says loudly. "I'm pissed because you were supposed to be the one fucking girl that didn't play mind games with me, yet here you are- playing the game just like Katherine." he said causing her to reach out and slap him across the face.

"I don't play games." I say causing him to roll his eyes. "And if I did, well then I learned from the best." I say heatedly. This whole conversation was pointless. The more attention we gave Damon the more he talked and really I was over it, and him.

That had stung but he tried not to let it show. He didn't want Mason Lockwood to see that she had hurt him and really he wasn't a fan of falling apart in front of Elena either, she would try to pacify him and that would make things worst. And as for Bonnie he knew she was mad at him and yeah she had claimed to have hated him, but to go as far as to climb on top of Mason Lockwood...a werewolf who was known as the sworn enemy of his kind, was taking things too far and most importantly he knew it was all a lie Deciding to ignore Bonnie for a moment he turned his icy glare in the direction of Mason Lockwood. "And you..you've been sniffing around her for a while waiting for the perfect moment to try and claim her for your own." he says acidly. "And now that you've got her in your grasp you try to run with your tail between your legs." he said causing the older Lockwood to turn his way as he let go of her hand in the process.

"Don't tempt me Salvatore, the only thing that is saving you from a beat down is your not worth it." he says angrily. "And for that matter I want Bonnie more then I want to beat on your bones." he said casting a look at the girl in question. He hadn't liked Damon since the night he had tried to kill him, and he had liked him even less when he had gotten wind that Bonnie had started seeing the elder Salvatore. Time had proved that Damon Salvatore was nothing but a soul sucking leech with the fact that he had hurt a girl that had loved him so fiercely and openly for a row in the hay with her friend. That was low, even for Damon.

I watched as both Mason and Damon had stood toe to toe and my eyes locked to the brown eyes of my ex bestfriend. We both knew what we had to do. Elena had gone to stand next to Damon while I had once again stood in front of Mason my head rested on his chest as I tried to stop a fight once again started by Damon. Next time I would let him get his ass kicked.

He wrenched Elena off of him. "Bonnie, get away from him, or I swear..."he started to say when she turned around to face him.

"You need to stop this." I say cutting him off. "Stop making a scene and most importantly stop acting like you have some right to be angry with Mason or me. We're not together anymore Damon and that's your fault not mine!" I say watching as he predictable stone walls me.

"Are you saying these things because of this morning?" he questioned ignoring the way Elena had gone stiff next to him but relishing the way he saw Mason and the anger that was in his eyes. "Or is this about the other night?" he questioned not bothering to offer any details. For the most part he wanted Mason to burn with anger as his imagination took over and Elena, well she could fill in the blanks if she wanted to. "Or is this payback for what happen between me and Elena?"

Damon had infuriated me so much. "I know this is hard for you to understand but the world doesn't revolve around you and your dick, or Elena and her vagina. " I said causing Mason to chuckle. I took a deep breath closing my eyes briefly before speaking honestly and slowly so Damon could understand everything I was saying. "I slept with Mason because I like him- it had nothing to do with you." I say not missing the way he suddenly loses that spark in his eyes.

It seemed my words had finally soaked into his head because this time when we turned to leave he hadn't stopped us, however I got the sinking feeling that all was not as it appeared because if anything Damon had liked a challenge.

He quirked a tight smile. "Are you trying to prove that to me, him or yourself?" he called out while watching her leave with the wolf. He wasn't sure if she had known it or not her leaving with the wolf had only proven one thing in his mind, and that she wanted him to chase her, the way he chased after Elena and he'd do it, because it was all in the name of love.

**DS-DS**

**Damon**

He watched as Bonnie had left with Mason glued to her side. Anger had flowed through his veins he could still see the two of them in his head, Mason had his hand practically all over her ass and Bonnie she all but had her ass in his crotch. Without much of a word to Elena he had stormed back into the Grill eager for some much needed alcohol because he needed something that would calm him down because the mere thought of what could be happening was starting to make him shake in anger. If he had gone after Bonnie now, if he had ripped apart Mason Lockwood nothing would ever come out of it. Yeah he would get to hold the heart of that smug bastard but Bonnie would never forgive him for killing someone she viewed as innocent.

Storming over to the bar he reached behind and grabbed a bottle of Jack Daniels as Elena had fluttered his way. He was in no mood to talk because he wasn't sure what might come out of his mouth. Bonnie had looked him square in the eye, with that confidence he had adored and hated at the same time, and she had claimed that she had slept with Mason Lockwood. It was like she was determined to hurt him which he couldn't blame her, that was why he didn't believe her. It had taken eons for her to even admit that the two of them had been fooling around yet with Mason freaking Lockwood she had come out in the open, as if this was something to fucking celebrate.

"Damon...its okay if you're upset." Elena says slowly. He doesn't look her way because he knows she wearing that look on her face that she always has when it comes to him, it's a face that shows pity and he doesn't want her fucking pity because nothing had happen. Bonnie was trying to hurt him, and it didn't work.

"I'm fine." he says tossing back a shot of the amber liquid.

She lets out a tired sigh while running her hands through her hair. "This is so typical- you pretend like you aren't hurt when really you are and then you start to drink...and bad things happen." she says almost jumping when he turns to look at her.

He sucks his teeth. "She lying, she didn't fuck him- she'd never do that especially since she loves me." he says more to himself then to her.

"And what if she did sleep with him, who are you to throw stones after everything we've done." she says openly.

"Are you saying you believe her? You think she slept with Mason Lockwood." he says with distaste.

She licked her dry lips. Bonnie had liked Mason forever and she had seen the two of them first hand at Purgatory- they looked like they were enjoying themselves. And the mere fact that Bonnie had smiled, a smile that was actually reaching her eyes while with Mason spoke volumes.

"Bonnie doesn't lie." she says simply.

His head fell forward on its own accord as he let her words sink in. He had known that moment Bonnie had walked into the mansion that something was off about her- she seemed happier then he had last seen her. Of course she was still dealing with the whole fallout with Stefan and his ripper ways, but in all the she was doing a hell of a lot better then him and now he knew why. Mason Lockwood had gotten to her, the same Mason Lockwood she had wanted for so long and he didn't know how to compete with that. He had competed with Stefan for the affection of both Katherine and Elena for so long, but Katherine had always known what she had wanted and Elena was very easy to sway- not to mention fickle. But with Bonnie it was different.

Bonnie was the type of girl that when knocked down got right back up fighting as if nothing had happen. Unlike vampire Barbie who often whined when things didn't go her way, Elena who pout or Stefan who would brood- Bonnie kept moving and he feared she was moving on with Mason.

"And she doesn't attack people even if they hurt her." she says pausing. "She didn't tell Caroline about us because despite how she feels about me she doesn't want to hurt me or Caroline. And she wouldn't have said anything to you about her and Mason if you hadn't pushed." she admitted.

He slammed his glass on the table and gave her a vicious. "So your saying this is my fault?" he demanded as he bore blue eyes in to brown. "This is my fault!" he said chuckling bitterly at her. If this was his fault, which he knew it was, then what was going on between Katherine and Stefan was her fault. Grinning he poured her a shot. 'You might need this." he says pushing the glass her way.

"I'm going to abstain from any alcohol beverages." she declares snottily and he wants to snort at her words but he just shrugs his shoulders.

He grinned. "Your loss not mine. Stefan and Katherine are hooking up." he says watching as her almond eyes suddenly look sadden. It was one thing for her to watch him crumble but now she was crumbling with him. Misery had loved company.

"What?" she asked quickly. "Stefan...wouldn't."

He nodded his head indicating that Stefan would and was hooking up with Katherine. "I called him out this morning and he didn't deny it, he smelled of her and later I heard him confess that he and Katherine were hooking up to Bonnie."

Without much of a word she took the glass and tossed back a shot. "She always wanted my life and now she has my boyfriend. How am I going to get him to forgive me?" she asked outloud.

He leaned forward on the bar. "How am I going to fight the one person she always wanted?" he asked looking to Elena who was still getting over her shot.

"We fight for them, we fight to have them in our lives tooth and nail and we don't stop till they know we love them."

He looked over at the girl before. Elena Gilbert had never had a good plan in her life, but she was right- if they were going to get back Bonnie and Stefan, they needed to fight and fight dirty at that.

"Do you love Stefan?" he asked for the first time in a long time.

"I'll always love Stefan, and even if we cant be together I need to get him away from Katherine, she's poison and she ruined your relationship with your brother- her being back in town is nothing but trouble." Elena says fiercely. It's the first time she ever tried to fight for something and it seems fitting that it is for Stefan.

It was on the tip of his tongue to point out that she had done the same, but right now she was his only friend and misery loved company. "I love Bonnie." he says for the first time to the other woman in his life. "And if she were to ask me to let her go, I wouldn't be able to because I know what love feels like and I can't let her share her love with someone else."

So he was going to fight dirty with or without Elena but at the end he'd get back Bonnie and everything else would fall back into place, he'd make sure of it.

**BB-BB-CF-CF**

2 weeks later

The sound of birds cawing in the distance drifts to my ears as I shift, and that is when I feel the warm body underneath me. Sitting up I realize that Mason had stayed over, and we had fallen asleep on the couch, fully clothed. We had spent most of the night, talking, making out and watching the first season of Supernatural. Mason couldn't understand why I would watch a show about the lives we lead while I had explained it was far more entertaining to watch Sam and Dean fight monsters instead of really fighting the good fight.

Hesitantly I detached myself from the sleeping man, and made my way to the kitchen intending to start the coffee machine. Suddenly the sound of the doorbell had rang causing me to nearly jump out of my skin. Quickly I headed for the door, while praying to the skies above that Damon hadn't decided to stop by, he had been rather quiet since seeing Mason and I together. Or worst Katherine with yet another attempt to get me to join a threesome with her and Stefan, or pervert Stefan who would probably ask me to join a threesome with him and Katherine. As if that would ever happen.

Opening the door I was relieved to see Caroline who barged in while talking a mile a minute. "It's about time, I've been calling you all morning." Caroline says sharply. "It' almost noon and we still have to pick up our dresses for the Lockwood Saints and Sinners party!"

"Caroline, this is not a good time...not a good time." I say while trying to keep her at bay and failing. I had hoped that she wouldn't directly look at the couch because then she would notice Mason and then I would have a lot of explaining to do.

Turning she spoke. "Oh my god!" she gushed. "This is why you couldn't call." Caroline says again excitedly before bumping hips with me. "I'm guessing by those awful sweat shorts, you didn't bone." Caroline calls causing my face to heat up

I chance a look at Mason who had finally sat up his hair is messy from sleep and he looks so cute. Guys had it so easy, they could wake up and look hot, Mason had looked hot when he woke up, I on the other probably looked like hell.

'Caroline, he can hear you." I say causing her to grin wider. My face heats up and I'm ten seconds away from shutting her up with magic when she speaks again

"On second thought maybe you did bone because your hair looks hell." she says while fingering a curl.

Heats rushes to my face as Mason and I share a look as Caroline continues to grin our way and that was how my morning had begun.

**...**

"Sooo how big is it?" Caroline asks as we stroll through the time square languidly. I knew she was going to grill me so I was ready for her questions.

"Really?" I ask as we scan through the lingerie section, which is not missed on me. The plan had been to pick up our dresses for the night, dresses that we had ordered around the time that I had first broken up with Damon and yet here we were lingerie shopping, after she had caught Mason at the house.

Picking up a black bra she eyed it before tossing it to her friend. "it'll make your boobs look killer tonight." she said winking while picking up something for herself. "Come on Bons, you've got to tell me something..." she said turning around abruptly. "Is it as big as Damons or is it around the same size as Stefans." Caroline asks easily. She held up crotch-less panties and I shook my head no, I'd never, like ever.

I nearly spit my coffee out at her words. Why did I always have a drink in hand while I was talking to her anyway- it had never ended well. I glared her way because she had always killed me, I could have choked to death and it would be all her fault and her noseyness if that is a word. "One, what makes you think I've seen Stefans peter?" I questioned frowning at the thought.

"Um don't you remember that horrible mix up at the cabin?" Caroline points out as she begins to walk around the store again.

I shuddered at the thought, nearly dropping the bra that she deemed would make my boobs look killer. I had conveniently deleted the image of that whole mix up from my memory because Stefan was my friend and to tell the truth I don't know who was more embarrassed about the cabin fiasco, me or him. "Really you had to remind me of that." I say spotting the perfect bra and panty set for my dress tonight. I wasn't sure if Mason would get to see it but I knew that I would feel sexier with wearing it underneath everything.

"Come on Bons!" Caroline says stopping pouting. "You've been off again spending time with your new boy toy and you can't even give me a crumb."

I felt my face heat up- just thinking about Mason had that effect on me. "Its not like I had a ruler with me, but lets to say I can't complain." I before giggling. Mason was good, real good.

Squealing she gave me a hug. "I'm so glad I new you guys had hooked up that night at purgatory because yeah- you were practically having sex on the dance floor but to know that it's happen again means that my sexy, happy, bff is back on track." she said swatting my butt before bouncing off to look at some of the other articles of clothing in the store.

One hour later we're still shopping after picking up our dresses and I'm looking at jewelry for the night when someone startles me .My breath nearly catches in my throat at the man who is standing in front of me, dressed to the nines in a suite that looks like it was made for him.

"My apologies- for frightening you." he says sticking his hand out. "My name is Elijah."

"Bonnie" I say smiling sheepishly at him while he kisses my hand. After a moment I retrieved my hand but I couldn't shake the feeling that had known this Elijah fellow, in fact he kept looking at me like he had known me as well and just when I was about to say something, the sound of Carolines voice had caused me to turn my head in her direction and soon Elijah was gone.

"Bad news Bons" Caroline called loudly causing me to turn in her direction.

I mentally cringed bad news could mean anything espeically in Mystic Falls. Lowering my voice I spoke. "Who died?" I asked too easily for my own good.

"Know one that I know of. I can't go to Saints and Sinners tonight. My dad just called upset he and Harold broke up and he's got these tickets for a vacation and..."

"You're going to go." I said filling in the sentence. "When do you leave?" I ask trying not to show my disappointment. I was all for family bonding especially since Caroline and her father had just started talking again. However it would have been so much fun to walk around the Lockwood Mansion for the masquerade party and dance around and just have fun. Plus I knew with Damon being back, and Stefan off the rails or doing Katherine, Caroline was the only sane person, she would keep me on track because knowing me, I'd mess around and screw up and everything and fall for Mason, because I tended to fall hard and fast.

"In a few hours." she smiles. "And if im gonna look hot."

"Then you need to leave now." I say grinning.

"You mad" Caroline asks while hugging me.

"Nah, you weren't my date anyway." I say winking at her as we walk to the car.

**BB-BB-BB**

After bidding Caroline an adieu I had strolled into the manor armed with everything I would need to get ready for this masquerade party. Stefan had informed me that Damon hadn't returned home in a couple days and I took this as an opportunity to pick the brain of my best bud. As for Damon he was probably drunk on booze or blood, hell he may have been drunk on Elena for all I knew. The one thing that I did know was that this party was going to be kick ass tonight, and I had the coolest date in the world. And no it wasn't Mason, but it was the next best thing and that was Stefan! Mason and I had talked about the two of us going together and after much talk we had decided that it may better if I had gone to the party with Stefan. After all this night was a tradition for the Lockwood family and the first real event that Mason and Tyler had thrown together. I didn't want the fact that I was his date for the night to ruin it, and since the party was thrown in Mystic Falls, I had known Damon would show up and I didn't want him to cause a scene for me, him or Mason.

The sound of loud music nearly smacks me in the face as I make it the second level of the manor, on my way to the room Stefan had given me. I nearly dropped my dress and shoes thinking that Damon had actually returned home and Stefan, who had been distracted lately due to Katherine, could be distracted. As I peered into the room, the music got louder as Katherine had danced in the middle of the music room to "moves like jagger" by Maroon 5 and Christina with a remote control in hand as she apparently lip synced to the song.

For a moment I was puzzled at seeing Katherine for once not being a manipulative bitch. In fact she looked to be having fun and for the first time fun didn't deserve toying with the lives of others. Shrugging my shoulders I continued on my way when suddenly dark eyes were staring in front of me. "He's in the shower." Katherine says a conspiring look on her face. "Why don't you join me." she purrs causing me to pop my bubble gum in her face.

It was on the tup of my tongue to tell her the only way I would join her, would be if she was the last person on earth and or if she'd promised to stop hitting on me. But since this was Katherine I knew my words would fall on deaf ears.

"That is if you think you can keep up." she says tossing a look over her shoulder.

I look over to the grandfather clock on the wall and notice we have plenty of time till the Lockwood party and place my dress on the nearby chair. Despite the fact that this was Katherine, I decided to play along. I'd school her in the art of lip syncing and then I'd try and see what her intentions were with Stefan. "Please, I can do circles around you." I say while grabbing my own remote control. Soon the sounds of "Moves like Jagger" is once again blasting through the stereo as Katherine and I began to lip sync for our lives, as Rupal would say. We're dancing and singing, and walking fierce like models from the catwalk and before I know it the song is over and we've collapsed onto the floor instead of on the plush chairs in the music room.

"What are you doing with Stefan." I ask after a long moment of silence. Stefan for the most part hasn't really opened up about Katherine except for the fact that she had reminded him who he was and that was about it. The only way I can really get something out of him, is if I bug the hell out of him and at most a get a few words before he reminds me how much Katherine wants a threesome with the three of us, and how he's game if I'm game. Of course I drop the subject because it never gonna happen.

She give a sly smirk before speaking. "The same thing I've heard you're doing with Mason Lockwood."

"Funny" I say glaring at her. "Are you in love with him, or is this all a game to you?" I ask not daring to back down. As his best friend, I needed to protect Stefan even if it meant going against a raging vampire bitch.

For a moment she is silent, before speaking as craftily as possible. "Just because Damon played you for a sucker doesn't mean I'm going to do the same to Stefan."

"Bitch" I say automatically causing Katherine to grin my way.

"what if I told you I loved him- would you believe me?" she asked playfully.

I thought for a moment, I don't think I'd ever believe a word out of Katherine's mouth, the only way I would believe her was if she proved it to Stefan and me that she really did care about him. "Not really." I say shrugging before making a move to stand up, as she does the same. Soon we're eyeing each other ready to make our next move. "Stefan is my bestfriend and I want you to know that if you dare to hurt him, I'll poke holes in your body with the best wooden stakes I can find and then I'll drain you of your blood so that you'll not only starve but feel as tortured as his heart will feel by your betrayal." I say deadly serious before pushing past the vampire and making my way to my bedroom.

By the time I've made it up the stairs Katherine is of course waiting for me a bored look on her face. She's perched up on the bed like some prize and I cant help but roll my eyes. Quickly she zooms my way just as I teleport my dress to her now vacant spot on the bed.

She slings her curly hair back over her shoulders before locking eyes with the green eyed witch. "Your not the only one that can dish out threats Bonnie." she said sliding her finger along the girls face. "If try to ruin this for me because of what the girl with my face has done to you or Stefan- I will rip out what's left of your broken little heart and put in a jar as a trophy." she says before smiling sweetly.

I stood my ground as we went toe to toe. I wasn't afraid of Katherine. She may have scared a lot of people in her day but I wasn't one of them. I could channel one hundred dead witches if needed, I was safe from a lot of things Katherine could do to me. "You really are a psychotic bitch." I say half amazed. For some reason I believed that Katherine had wanted Stefan and maybe in her own way she had loved him as well. Of course I'd never tell her that.

Cracking a smile she spoke. "And you really are a overprotective torturing witch bitch." she says fondly. "Who threatens to drain a vampire of its blood?" she asked mildly amazed. She had always thought she and Bonnie would make good friends, that girl had fire and the two of them would make one hot team!

"You got the message." I say shrugging

"and you got mine" Katherine countered

Before either of us could say another word, Stefan walks into the room with a low slung towel wrapped around his hips. He looks at me and then Katherine and then back at me before speaking.

"Bow chaka wow wow." Stefan says pointing at the two of us. "So do you ladies wanna hook up?"

Katherine and I share a look mine of disgust while hers of humor, we then look to Stefan before vacating the room.

"Come back...you know you like Italian meat." Stefan calls.

**...**

Three hours later we are all dressed and ready for the party. After my showdown with Katherine we had called a truce mainly because we kind of respected each other. Katherine had even gone as far as to do my hair and makeup which looked kick ass. Turns out Kat was the perfect makeup person she could do any and everything but I guess that had to do with being old as hell.

Tonight I had done a blood red dress that was figure hugging. The theme party I had decided to play the role of a sinner, and my blood red dress that was figure hugging and It had a low plunging

Katherine had worn a strapless black lace dress which was perfect for her because she was sinner. And finally Stefan had done a black tux and red tie rounding out our sinners list. Tonight we were going to have fun and armed with our masks we headed for the Lockwood Party Saints and Sinners.

**A.n. 2**: this chapter was so much fun to write, i know some may think the Bonnie and Katherine scene may have been out of left field but i thought it was a cool way to get everything out in the open. **Spoilers:** Delena team up, and Bamon, and Mason and Bonnie! **Plus**: Saints and Sinners bring out the best and worst in everyone. Unresolved feelings are revealed, confrontations and more


	8. Chapter 8 part 1

**A.N. hey all i'm back with an update, thanks to all that have read, replied and/or favorite/alerted this story. Any grammar mistakes are my own. now lets jump into this story. **

**p.s. the soundtrack to this chapter: Duffy-delayed devotion, Grace Potter-apologies, Adele-melt my heart to stone**

xoxo

queena

_"I'm just hopelessly hopeful and your just hopeful enough, but we never had it all" FOB_

**Chapter: 8 Part 1: Heart of Glass**

I had always been fascinated with the Lockwood mansion, in fact I could remember as a child whenever we had managed to play at the Mansion it had reminded me of one the castle in one of the Disney movies, and tonight the fairy tale had taken a dark turn. Saints and Sinners was the name of the party thrown tonight.

Arm in arm, Stefan, Katherine and myself had walked into the stylish party ready to have fun. Tonight I had worn a vintage red dress that had hugged my figure and went just below my knees. Katherine had been nice enough to style my hair in loose curls that had gone down my back while my bangs had hung loosely. To my left Stefan had stood in a fabulous Marc Jacobs black suite with a red tie, shedding his traditional black tie attire. And last but not least, Katherine rounded out our little trio with a black strapless lace dress. And to be honest the three of us had looked pretty bad ass! With our mask on, the three of us headed further into the mansion to see that the party was in full swing.

"Ok first things first, you need to calm down because your heart beat cant beat any faster. Mason is here this is his house and you've already had sex with him so obvious he likes you." she rattles on. "Besides you already look too eager, you need to play coy. " Katherine says turning to look at me while I raise my eyebrows to my hairline at her sudden change. What happen to her and Stefan giving each other the sideways look as if they were scared to like look at each other. I got it, they were insanely attracted to each other and probably the moment I left them they'd find the nearest bedroom, tree or any other surface to get their freak on.

I let out a annoyed breath making sure to roll my eyes for her benefit. I was not going to take advice from an ageless vampire madame. "Ok really, im not interested in your ageless madame advice." I say shoot out giving her a fake smile. "Besides I am fine." I stress out.

"Your heart beat says something else." she says smirking.

I wanted to wipe that smirk right off of her face. "Yeah and your dress says something too, slut."I deadpan sarcastically only to get yet another grin. It was unnerving seeing her so damn happy, Stefan must be laying the pipe down like hardcore. As soon as the thought crossed my mind I shuddered once again, that was something that never should have crossed my mind.

Katherine grins. "Says the girl whos dress screams take me hot uncle Mason."

The sound of laughing had stopped the two of us from continuing our rather childish banter. The sight was something for sore eyes and I don't who was more thrilled to hear the sound of his laughter me or Katherine. I guess our faces was all the question Stefan needed because he soon speaks.

"Every guy in here is jealous because instead of having one date, I have two!" he says fingering a lock of Kat's curly hair, before nuzzling Bonnies, nose affectionately. "And...well the two

of you are kind of cute together." he says sheepishly. "Never in my life have I ever met two people who are so different yet fit together perfectly like you two." Stefan muses while they continue through the mansion.

I shake my head at him before spotting Mason standing at the top of the stairs. I know its him because the moment we make eye contact my heart flutters in my chest.

"Not a word." I say holding my hand up and stopping Katherine from saying anything.

**BB-BB**

Before I know it, Stefan and Katherine have gone away and I've managed to lose Mason.

The first time I spotted him, he had a flock of people gathered around him, including Jules. She had seemed to be glued to his side and I had a feeling that she wouldn't leave her duty as "date" anytime soon especially since she had made it public knowledge that she didn't approve of what was going on between me and Mason. If Jules had a problem with me that was too damn bad because I liked Mason and he liked me and I wasn't going to let anyone wether that be Jules, Damon, Elena, or the wolfpack ruin my chance at real happiness. Doormat Bonnie had went up in flames with my past bad luck and relationship, and now like a phoenix rising I was ready to take charge of my life...with Mason.

As a waiter passed by I quickly grabbed a flute of champagne before making a move in hopes of finding Mason when suddenly I felt two arms reach out for me, tugging me to a hard body. Mason had done the same thing to me that first night at Purgatory. That night had changed me for the better, it brought back my smile, the one I had been missing. I felt him wrap his arm around my waist as he nuzzled his nose into my neck before placing soft kisses their. We hadn't had much time to talk after this morning and being near him, had made my pulse quicken and butterflies flutter.

It was fitting that I hadn't had to look for Mason, because he had found me, that was how in sync we were with each other. After a few months we had already established a connection that was so vibrant that the possibilities of what could be was endless. Turning around my smile falters as I catch sight of two glacier eyes belonging to the devil himself.

"Expecting someone else?" he says his voice playful and suggestive as he corks an eyebrow up at her. He had been watching her from the moment she had entered the party on the arm of his brother with Katherine in tow. He hadn't been able to keep his eyes off of her. She had looked stunning from afar, even Elena had said so, and close up she looked nearly breathtaking. And although it killed him to admit, not for the first time did he wish he and his brooding brother had switched places. Bonnie had adored Stefan and as a result his off the rails brother had gotten to escort the green eyed beauty, who looked mesmerizing. Only Stefan could have Bonnie on his arm and Katherine in his bed. He had envied his brother, and that alone had made him question some of his past indiscretions.

I hesitated for a moment, as I caught sight of Damon Salvatore his voice ran over me like smooth silk against my naked skin. And I fought to keep a controlled reaction as he smirked my way in all his arrogant glory. He was totally a male Katherine, that was where he got all of his annoying qualities. "Damon." I say as evenly as possible though the moment our eyes meet its like my heart is beating to the beat of an 808 drum. It hadn't been too long since we had been this close, but it had been a long enough.

"Bonnie." he calls, a smile on his lips while looking her up and down. "You look beautiful." trips out of his mouth accidently. He had wanted to light the fire behind her green orbs however the mere sight of her up close had nearly left him speechless.

He had wrapped his free arm around her tugging her that much closer to him in. God had he missed holding her in his arms, he missed her tiny body snuggling up to his at night- and although he had often pretended it was a chore, he liked knowing that someone had loved him...really loved him. He also missed waking up to bright green eyes shining back at him. And what he hated was all the memories that would flood him whenever he was alone. Bonnie was inside of him, she had worked her way into his un-beating heart and with each day that passed without her, the same heart that she had helped jumpstart figuratively speaking of course, would beat quieter and quieter.

His sudden confession had caused my eyes to go wide. And I a sinking feeling nothing good would come out of his sudden admission. With my bad luck he would try and succeed to kiss me just as Mason happen to walk by because my luck sucked so much ass!

Quickly I cleared my throat. "Shouldn't you relishing in the fact that this is the first of many parties you get to attend with Elena on your arm?" I ask with disgust. I wasn't jealous, although by the look on his face, I knew Damon had thought otherwise. One of the reasons I was excited about this party was the mere fact that I knew Damon would leave me the hell alone, especially since he had finally gotten Elena, yet here we were together again. As for Elena, well she was going to get what was coming to her in the form of Katherine and Stefan soon.

He cracked a smile. "You sound jealous." he asked quickly, catching as her eyes flickered. He had expected her to come back with something witty or even scathing because then the conversation would be reminiscent to the way they used to be when they "hated" each other. The only difference was that hate had turned into love which in turn- had manifested into love/hate relationship. However she said nothing for a moment and he wondered if she had been jealous. "Bonnie" he calls lifting her chin up with his finger.

"There is nothing to be jealous of, we both got something out of our breakup you got your precious Elena. 'I said with an eye roll. "And I got Mason Lockwood." I say not being able to stop the small smile that had crept to my lips at the mere mention of Mason. My heart may have been shattered by Damon, but I was moving on with Mason and I was happy. With Mason I could breathe whereas when I was with Damon, it was like I was suffocating.

He glared her way as she had unwillingly smiled at the mention of that damn wolf. "Its funny that you mention him, where is your boytoy after all?, I noticed you aren't on his arm tonight, trouble in paradise already?" he said ignoring the way she glared his way. "Let me guess he doesn't do it like I do it? I understand its difficult to keep up with me." he says his words dripping with confidence. "If you want I could break you off, it'll be like the first time..with all that hate, anger and hurt..it'll be so much better because I know you and you know me." he says into my ear his words dripping with seduction. "I know where you liked to be touched." he says as his hand travels along her neck. "I know where you like to be kissed." he says placing a kiss on her shoulder.

My startled eyes met his and I bit the inside of my jaw to stop me from falling under his spell. It was afterall at a similar Lockwood party that I had admitted to falling under his spell, it was Valentines day and I had been on a date with Jeremy, and somehow I ended up with Damon.

"Uh go away." I nearly whined as he graced me with a dazzling smile.

"And leave you all by your lonesome." he says pausing to look her up and down once again. "Especially when your looking like that..never" he says swinging his arm around her shoulder.

Now it was my turn to grin. I found myself spinning out of his arms so that I could lift his chin up so he could look into my eyes instead of looking at my body. "Oh but Damon, im not lonely not anymore." I say pausing as he attempts to have eye sex with me, not gonna happen. "And I guess I have you and your human ping pong to thank." I say biting back a giggle. Elena the human ping pong who went between brothers- she'd go anywhere they sent her. "So manwhore thank you. Now if you'll excuse I've got someone else I'd rather be with." I say patting his cheek three times before chucking the deuces and walking away.

He cant help but smirk. This was what he had always liked about her she had a mouth on her that was so amazing it sent him chills just thinking about it. She could talk the talk and walk the walk and damn it was sexy. He watched her walk away enjoying the view till it occurred to him that she was going to find Mason, and he'd be damned if Mason got to reap the benefit of being with her, especially since this was the Lockwood party, he wouldn't let the two of them make a statement, not today and not ever.

" Your better then this Bonnie." he says pausing "You know he's just using you don't you." he calls causing her to stop mid stride. Bonnie had been fooling herself thinking that Mason had really wanted her. Mason was a man, and any man would want revenge on the person who tried kill him, it's the reason the wolf was sniffing around Bonnie. It made perfect sense to him, now he just had to convince Bonnie.

Heat rushed to my face as I thought about his accusation. Of course Damon would think that Mason was using me because nobody in their right mind would ever want me for me, not Bonnie Bennett, not when their was Elena Gilbert running around waiting to be loved and saved. Marching over to him I glare his way. "You would think that wouldn't you- is it so ridiculous for you to think that someone would want me for me?" I asked my armor slipping as I let him know that once again he had managed to hurt me.

"You used to be smarter then this Bonnie. It took you ages to let your guard down with me but with Mason, its hearts stars and rainbows all around." he says he words loud and clear for me and it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know what he's talking about.

I open my mouth to say something else about me and Mason, and shut it just as quickly. I didn't need to defend my relationship with Mason, or my actions, not anymore. I knew I could trust Mason, and with Damon, I had always known that the two of us were walking a fine line, that was the difference, however he didn't deserve the answer. "I know I'm not Elena, and that its hard for you to believe that someone would ever want me, but Mason does want me, and I want him and the best part is that he saved me from ever going back to you." I spat slapping him across his face. He could go to hell for all I cared...I was done.

"No so fast." he rapt out yanking her back to him. He was aware that once again he had hurt her, again. It wasn't his intention, he just wanted her away from Mason Lockwood. He had seen them together and it had scared him because she had looked happy, really happy...happier then with him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." he said his voice quiet.

I clicked my tongue. "Yet you do it all the time."

_I feel my heart burst and bleed_

_as you tear right through me_

He let out a deep breath. He hated dealing with his feeling but they kept nagging at him, and words kept clawing out of his throat making him look like an emo vampire from those books. "Its not hard for me to believe that someone would want you...because I'm one of those people..and I guess the same thing that drew me to you...that draws everyone to you is the same thing that is drawing him to you as well."

_right under my feet is air made of bricks_

_pulls me down and makes me weak for you_

As angry and hurt as I was by him, I felt my breath catch in my throat at the way he was looking at me, it was raw and open and maybe for the first time in a long time really honest. I pushed back at him trying to put distance between the two of us and tried to ignore the look he was giving me, which could thaw out an iceberg. But their was something else in his glacier eyes, that were now outlined like racoon or bandit by his mask.

He had totally killed my buzz.

"Elena and I are just friends. We've decided we can only be friends...that's all we can ever be." he says suddenly as if the weight of the world had been lifted off his chest because that was how it felt. He was aware that on some level him showing up to this damn party with Elena would look bad but really they weren't trying to jump each others bones, well not anymore, in fact working together.

Some would say that he was playing with fire by keeping Elena close but right now she was all he had left. Stefan had made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with his older brother and Bonnie, she was falling in love with Mason, or maybe she just really liked his company. In all honesty he had always known that Bonnie had a thing for Mason, she may have even been in love with him before they even started but what scared him most was that Mason could be falling for Bonnie. And he knew it could happen because he had fallen for her, without even really knowing it.

"How heartbreaking for you." I say with the tilt of the head.

"Bonnie" he calls as both of his hands brace her shoulders, he wanted to shake some sense into her but figured that would set her off. "I'm telling you the truth..that thing with Elena, its over." he says fiercely. He needed her to listen to him. For once she was going to listen to every word he said. And if she hadn't listen he was going to show her because actions had always spoke louder then words when it came to Bonnie. It wasn't what you said to her- it was what you didn't say that had always lingered with the witch.

"It'll never be over between the two of you." I say penned by his glacier eyes. "You and Elena will never be just friends." I say ignoring the way one of the party goers looks my way at the sound of my voice. I realize its Jules just as she hightails it away-probably to tell Mason that I'm huddled up with my ex boyfriend. I let out a tired sigh. "You and Elena are doing your normal dance- one of you has to pretend that you don't care so the other can pine away for them. " I pointed out. "Only the difference is that you've both decided to pretend that you don't care. " I pointed out expertly. "And this time I don't care what you choose to do. You guys could be together you could be apart and I still wouldn't give a damn."

"You care." he says fiercely. "And I know that because I care about you being with Mason." he admits, shockingly. He hadn't intended on getting into this now, but she was here and he was here and he wouldn't miss his chance to tell her how he felt.

I didn't understand how this had become my life. I felt like I was going crazy. I had already had the conversation about a million times and nothing was changing, and for the life of me I was tired of it. I just wanted to have a normal life, I wanted to live life without constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop...I wanted to date a guy or many guys and just be happy because I hadn't been happy with Damon, not for a long time.

"Let go of me Damon." I say trying to wrench myself out of his grasp. I wanted to be with Mason, I wanted to find Mason and I wanted Damon to go away and leave me the hell alone.

_Its crazy, how love stays with me_

_You know and it hurts me_

_cause I don't want to fight this war_

"I can't" he finally burst. At first when she had broken up with him, he had been in a funk because well not many girls had walked away from him. But now it had been pass the part of return and he couldn't get her out of his mind. " Can't you see that I'm going crazy without you." he says taking his mask off. "I can't." he breathes out while he captures her arms briefly.

_Its amazing to see me_

_reading through this scene_

_of love and fear_

"Why are yo doing this to me?" I asked my resolve slipping. I ran my hands through my hair tiredly probably ruining all the hard work Katherine had done because he was making me crazy. "What do you want from me?" I asked again. I couldn't do this anymore, with him being so close to me it did things to me that it shouldn't do. I may have been able to refuse him, but that didn't mean that it had been easy for me, and being so close to him it still hurt-so much. That was why I had tried to avoid him as much as possible. He was still Damon and I was still Bonnie and no matter what, together we were toxic and one wrong move could lead somewhere I never wanted to return to.

_And apologies_

_apologies_

He licked his dry lips as he stared down at her. He had spent many nights lying awake thinking about everything."I thought I wanted Elena, " he muses as he runs a hand through his hair hazardously. "But the more time we're apart the more I want you...I want you Bonnie. I want you." he says his words dripping with desperation. He inches closer to her in hopes of capturing her lips but she turns away causing him to drop a kiss to her cheek. He finds that he's melted into her as every inch of his body is slithered up against her. Her heart is beating fast and her blood is calling out for him, just as her body is doing that same thing.

I let out a bitter chuckle. "You always want what you can't have!" I say as everything finally clicks. This wasn't about me, or us, it was about me not wanting him. "You want me because you cant have me, you wanted Elena because you couldn't have her, but when you had me, you didn't care. You had your chance..." I say my eyes prickling with tears.

_I don't want to fight this war_

He using his thumb to wipe away the stray tear that had fallen from her eyes. He didn't mean to hurt her, but he couldn't help the way he felt and he wouldn't be ashamed of his feelings or what he was doing to her mind right now. "Dance with me." he says suddenly and by the look on her face he can tell she's ready to break away and run far from him. "Please...I just want to hold you." he whispers and he hated this desperate feeling that falls over him.

Despite knowing that this was a bad idea, I couldn't help but feel the familiar tug while being in his arms. That of course didn't mean that I was going back to him because that ship had sailed.

_Its crazy how love stays with me_

_and it hurts me_

"One dance and then you'll leave me alone?"." I ask as he begins to sway to the music. The sound of Grace Potter and the Nocturnals, Apologies is floating around us as we sway quietly. This was the last time we would go through this-it was time we both just let it all go. It was tiring holding onto all of my anger for him and all of the hurt and now I just wanted to be happy and if he loved me...if he loved me maybe he could do for me what he could never do for Elena and let me go.

He inhaled her scent running his nose along the side of her neck. With her body pressed up against him, it reminded of long ago, when she had loved him. "This feels good." he whispered fondly his breath dancing in her ear. He had hoped that with their closeness it would remind her that not everything was all bad, that they had been happy once, that she had trusted him...even loved him. "I miss you." he whispers as they continue to sway. "I miss Sunday morning where your reading the sale ads, and I miss teaching you how to cook because- well you burn popcorn." he says a hint of sadness in his voice.

"Damon, don't..." I say hoping to stop him. I could hear it in his voice, he thought he could change my mind but he couldn't.

_you know it hurts me_

_that I didn't figure it out before_

"Don't what?" he asked his voice full of emotion as his eyes went wide with each word. "Remind you of how good we were together?" he questioned scathingly. "Because I feel it every time I look at you. I relive everything we've shared every night and I wake up reaching for you the same way I know you wake reaching for me." he said just as the song ended. They were now standing in front of each other as close as possible but farther away at the same time.

_I hear your words, I made up_

_you say my name like_

_their could be an us_

"I think about that night all the time Bonnie." he says feeling shameful. The look on her face the way he heard her heart shattering it had haunted him..taunted him.

I felt my heart constrict in pain. "Of course you do because you finally got your beloved and your beloved got you." say ignoring the pain of the memory. I shut my eyes only to see everything replay behind my eyelids. This was a bad idea, giving into him to get him off my back was a bad idea.

_I'm the only one in love_

_I'm the only one in love_

"No" he said shaking her a bit."Look at me?" He burst suddenly. "I miss you...I miss us." he says when she finally looks his way. He had realized that Bonnie was all he needed and he'd never let her go.

Opening my eyes I looked at him really looked at him and what I saw nearly broke my heart. Damon had convinced himself that he loved me, and maybe before I would have went blindly back to him, but I couldn't never again. "I'm with Mason now." I say using my hands to remove his from my face. "I stopped missing you the moment I realized that we could never be together."

"Fine" he says annoyed. "Tell me you don't love me and I'll leave you alone." he poses as his eyes scan her erratically.

_Why do you steal my hand_

_whenever I'm standing on my own ground_

" It doesn't matter if I loved you or if you love me because I realize that I could never trust you with my heart." I say as our eyes bore into one another. "And because of that I've open up to the possibility of giving my heart to someone else." I say leaving out the fact that one day I would give my heart away again and that would never be to him.

My words are loud even to my own ears that are beginning to ring. I watch as hurt flickers across before it is carefully covered with a well practiced face that he had reserve only for Elena. The silence between us last for only a few more moments before he stomps off in the other direction and its only then that I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding. When Damon was hurt or angry bad things happened he acted out, and did crazy things and the last time he had done so was with me. Damon wanted to be saved and I couldn't save him...most importantly I didn't want to save him.

_Each and every-time I try to leave you_

_I feel my heart burst and bleed_

**-SS/KP-**

**Stefan**

Stefan Salvatore had gone to many parties in his lifetime and afterlife butt this party had been something that he had needed- hell he'd even go as far as to say that everyone had needed this party. The last two and half months hadn't been easy on him, or for everyone for that matter. The night he had found Elena with Damon, he wasn't surprised he knew it was going to happen sooner or later, but what he didn't expect was the hurt he felt and not just for himself, but for his bestfriend. He had watched Bonnie suffer so much because of his brother and that had hurt the most. Bonnie had worn her emotions on her sleeve while he had bottled up his anger and resent for both his brother and ex girlfriend. And when he finally burst of so much hate and anger he had relapsed on human blood...something he had never thought he would return to. That first night had been the scariest night he had face in many, many years, and in the midst of all the chaos, he had found Katherine Pierce.

_Flashback_

_He had snuck out again, Bonnie had fallen asleep in his arms, crying again over his idiot brother and as a result of seeing her hurt and pushing his own hurt aside he had snuck out to blow off steam, what he hadn't expected was to end up smoking a cigarette, with a bodacious red head with green eyes. She had attempted to flirt with him and he had played along for a while before she had leaned in closer to him. Her heart had been beating out of her chest because she had been so excited. He had worked her up and before he knew it, he was biting her neck. The blood tasted like ambrosia as he dragged her to the darkened area. He couldnt control it...didn't want to control it and let then animal inside out to play._

_The smell of blood was in the air as he lurked in the dark. His hands were covered in blood as he looked at the woman who was once alive before him twisted on the ground like a marionette doll. Sinking to his knees he silently mourned for the girl, when he felt someone touch his shoulder. With his vampire speed he quickly choked the intruder but was quickly knocked down to the ground. Opening his eyes he caught sight of a curly hair and an unforgettable smirk._

_"Katherine." he gasped before looking at the corpse of the woman he had drained. "Help me." he said as his hands began to shake with adrenaline. "Help me." he says again his voice now a whisper. He watches with hooded eyes as she kneels down next to him, the sound of her boots sounding loud in his ears._

_With a smirk she speaks. "All you had to do was ask."_

_End of flashback_

"I hope you aren't brooding because this is a no brooding zone." Katherine says as she walks across the grass barefoot, having lost her shoes a long, long time ago. He watches as she flops down next to him a bottle of whisky in hand which they had mixed with blood just for kicks. She leans his way teasing him for a moment before pushing him down violently a glimmer in her eyes.

He opens his mouth but she silences him by dancing around to the song that is played in the mansion. He watches as she swivels her hips. The lace dress that she is wearing reminds him of lingerie that he has ripped off her body countless times. He watches as she continues to twirl around her long curly hair fanning around her before she meets his gaze.

She lets out a sigh while tip toeing back to him, as her long curly hair falls forward. She once again dips his way. "You worry too much Stefan, Bonnie is stronger then you give her credit for."

He bites back a grin. She really did know him. "Is that so?" he questioned with furrowed brows.

"Yes" she said simply. "You don't need to worry about Bonnie, especially when you have me right here, ready and willing to take your mind off of her." she said moving closer just as he flips them over so that she is now on his suite jacket.

He eyes her, with dark gray orbs. " come here" he rasps out, as he harshly pulls her to him causing their lips to connect hungry.

**- meanwhile-**

Elena Gilbert had been wandering around the Lockwood compound for what seemed like hours. She had been looking for Stefan hoping to stop the madness that was the Stefan and Katherine. She had been on mission to hopefully talk some sense into Stefan because Katherine was nothing but trouble, she had single handed ruin the lives of everyone she touched which had included, Stefan, Damon, Bonnie and of course herself. If it weren't for Katherine things would be much different. Earlier she had caught a glimpse of Damon and Bonnie and had nearly swallowed her tongue just at looking at the two of them. The one time couple were so different yet they went together like peanut butter and chocolate. And then their was the way they looked at each other, or rather the way Damon had looked at Bonnie tonight...it almost made her long for the times when Damon had looked at her with such passion.

For a moment she got lost in her thoughts what if she had met Damon first would they have gotten together leaving Bonnie and Stefan who were already so connected a chance to be a couple. Things of course would be so much different, for starters she would still have her sister in her life and Stefan for that matter, they could have been friends instead of the nothing she had now. When she really thought about it- it was depressing, she couldn't decide who she wanted more Stefan or Damon and in the end she had lost everyone she had loved except for Damon and even he was pulling away.

She was brought out of her thoughts by the sound of giggling that sounded familiar and that was when she saw them, Stefan and Katherine...together. Flush with anger, she stormed over, only to have them look at her, Katherine with a smile that was brighter then the sun on a hot day and Stefan with a look of annoyance. Her eyes flicker to the position that the two of them were in, Stefan was lying on top of Katherine, with his hand beneath her dress and she hated seeing it.

"Get away from my boyfriend!" she nearly screams at the woman whose face she shares.

The outburst causes the couple to look up at her, murderously for her intrusion.

"Ex boyfriend!" Katherine taunts.

She turns away not being able to see him with someone else, even if that someone else shares her face. "God Stefan look what your doing to yourself? She spat out ."This is the same woman you once said was a parasite, she ruined you and Damon." she splutters out.

_Cry me a river_

"Well isn't that the pot calling the kettle black." Katherine says suddenly flashing in front of the girl that had worn her face. "It's funny you can say all of these things about me, I'm vile, manipulative, psychotic and lets not forget a slut- but you..you're the golden girl." Katherine sneers with a smile.

Elena juts her chin out defiantly, before casting a look in the direction of Stefan who now has his, arm firmly around Katherine. " I said it, and I meant it. " she says slowly. "You ruin everything you touch...look what you did to Damon...to Stefan you broke them and I wont let you do it again, because they deserve better." she says with all her might.

Katherine throws her head back and laughs loudly. "Your one to talk." she says cocky. "Didn't you just ruin the best thing you had by riding his brother? And lets not forget what you did to Bonnie, you fucked your boyfriends brother and screwed your best friend all in one night. So in my book you're the one that ruined everything." she says walking closer to the girl. 'And look at you-you have nothing. Damon is off trying to win back Bonnie, I guess doppelganger pussy isn't a good as you thought it was." she says biting her lip as to not laugh at the crestfallen face of her clone.

"Stefan are you going to let her talk to me like this?" Elena demands are eyes welling up with tears as she puts her hands on her hips.

"At least she's honest." he says looking over fondly at the curly haired vamp. "Katherine doesn't lie, she doesn't pussyfoot around stuff like you do." he says chuckling bitterly. " after everything you've done Elena, you have the nerve to question what I'm doing?" he nearly yelled. "You fucked my brother! So stop pretending to be the naive good girl, because your nothing but a but a poisonous lying bitch!"

She purse her lips together before speaking. "Stefan, this isn't you." she calls as she watches him zip up his pants without shame. She had just found him with Katherine the woman who had ruined his life so many years ago and instead of having an excuse or even feeling bad about falling into the vampires dankness he didn't seem to have a care in the world. She had found him with Katherine his pants had been undone and his hands had been up her dress. If she had found them a few beats more, she would have seen a hell of a lot more then she had ever wanted. Even knowing that she and Katherine looked alike, the thought of seeing Stefan with someone else would break her, even if they weren't together anymore. Stefan had been a her first and knowing that he moved on with someone so vile as Katherine had made her blood boil. Katherine didn't deserve another chance, not after what she had done, to everyone.

"Actually it is me." he says giving her a smirk. It felt so good to be free of him, she was like this weight that just hung around his neck, and she brought him down, had he been human Elena would have been the brick around his neck that had sunk him down in the ocean. "I realized that without you I'm much happier." he says a full fledged smile forming on his lips. " I don't have to babysit your every move or worry about so much of getting a hang nail." he says pausing to get a real good look at her puzzled face it was priceless. It had taken him so long to see Elena for who she really was, and now that he had seen the truth he was free of her, her lies and deceit.

"Stefan you don't mean that?" she said more like a statement then a question. His eyes were so unreadable and it scared her because that was the effect Katherine had on him. Katherine was evil and turning Stefan into a unfeeling shell of the person he used to be.

He gave her a dark look just as Katherine had slithered his way.

_Go and just cry me a river_

"I realized that you were sucking the fun out of my life just like you were busy sucking off Damon. Katherine however, had brought back everything you and your mock selflishness had taken away from me. He wrapped his left arm around the vamp and brought her closer before planting a sloppy kiss on her lips, for the hell of it. When he pulled away, Katherine had giggled. Turning his attention back to the Elena and her doe eyes he spoke, malice dripping from his mouth like wetness between Katherine legs only an hour ago.

She had let out a sudden gasp, she had never seen Stefan this way, he was so angry so hurtful and yet at the same time he was composed and almost calculated with every word her uttered her way. "Listen Stefan." she said calmly. "I know that I hurt you but this is Katherine.." She ran her hands through thick brown hair. "Are you trying to hurt me, is that why you're with her?" She questioned. "Your acting just like Damon!" she rants causing him to loose control and vamp out.

"Never compare me to him!" he nearly screams in her face. "My brother is a soulless leech but you already know that because your just like him. You think everything you've done is forgivable because your Elena but your wrong, you'll always be a liar and cheater but most of all." he says quieting his voice down. "You'll always be a horrible friend." he says smiling as her lip trembles.

_Bridges are burned now its your turn to cry_

Katherine smile as the girl in front of her starts to breakdown. She had always hated her clone and now was the perfect time to strike at the bitch who dared to steal her life. "Oh are you gonna cry now? " she asks tauntingly

The girl in question met eyes with the person who had ruined her life and did something she had been wanting to do for a very long time, she slapped her across the face.

Smiling Katherine licked her canines. "Your dumber then I thought." she said before launching herself onto her clone.

Stefan watched mildly amused. Girl fights were always entertaining.

Song credit: Grace Potter-apologies, Adele-melt my heart to stone and Justin Timberlake cry me a river.

**A.n.2**: i hoped you liked the chapter i thought it was time everyone get everything out in the open Bamon and Stelena wise. leave me a review and tell me what you think.

**spoilers**: Elijah makes an appearance, Mason and Bonnie share a moment, Elena, Stefan and Katherine battle, and Damon stumbles upon something he never expected. **More to come**: a heart to heart is shared, and a look back into the past.


	9. Chapter 8 part 2

**A.N.** Hey all my battery died so this came out a lot later then i planned. Thanks to everyone who read and replied! enjoy

special thanks to: aprilf00l, Brazilianfan, jewelsstars, randomlittleme, and Ladyjaxs999

xoxo

queena

* * *

><p>"<em>Even though we're a part save a place in your heart, you'll always be my baby<em>" Brian mcknight

**Chapter 8 Part 2: The art of Love**

_Elijah_

Elijah Mikaelson stood with his arms crossed as he watched the witch in front of him, continue with the summoning spell. In order for everything to be complete they had to move fast, and right now was the perfect time to have Alexandria connect with her daughter. Bonnie was vulnerable right now, her defenses were down and she had needed her mother now more then ever, and Alexandria had needed Bonnie just as well. Of course he knew the spell would only last for a few moments but it would be enough to begin the process of releasing Allie and thus reuniting the family that should have always been his, instead of the family that was.

"We have until midnight, if Alexandria fails to contact Bonnie then it'll close and you'll have to wait till the three hearts are within the same place again." Greta said looking over at him.

He nodded his head in the direction of Greta. The stage was set. He just needed everything to fall into place. In order for Bonnie to truly break the spell she had to travel the road her mother had traveled and after witnessing the power the young girl had over the men in her life, he knew that indeed this was the time.

He had been watching Bonnie all night as she had bounced from person to person, she was every bit, her mothers' daughter. She had this light about her, this air that made you want to get to know her, and that was why so many people were enamored with the young girl. She however had no idea that she was a sought after woman, but he had known just like every other male within inches of her had known as well. She was a lovely girl, and it appeared that she had two men that were vying for her attention as well.

From across the room, he had watched as the young girl and the elder Salvatore had shared a very painful moment. It was clear to him as he was sure it was clear to anyone who dared to take their eyes off of the one time couple that clearly things were not as finished as one would like to think. In his time in knowing the vigilante he had never really seen pure emotion, until tonight. Damon Salvatore had truly been in love but it looked like the girl in question was in no mood to return his love at least not in this moment.

And then there was the wolf, rounding out. The trifecta was non other than Mason Lockwood. It appeared that Bonnie and Mason were in the early stages of courtship but what he had seen between the two of them was vibrant as if it had been simmering beneath the surface for a very long time. Apart the separate individuals looked like random supernatural beings but together with the aspect of love thrown in, they were the perfect recipe to break the curse that Lexington had placed on Alexandria. Tonight was the night and nothing would ruin his plan.

**BB-BB**

It's no surprise that I find myself in a heated debate with my ex, because that was my life. Sometimes I wondered if maybe me and Damon were just drawn to this 're standing before each other further then I ever thought. We couldn't work things out, I knew it and Damon had known it he just didn't want to admit it. I would never love anyone the way I loved Damon, I was sure of that but just because you loved someone didn't mean they were right for you.

"You know, all I ever wanted was for you to save me, just once, but I realize now you could never save me because you can't even save yourself." I say sadly. I wasn't trying to mean, I didn't want to hurt him but for once we needed to be honest with not only ourselves but each other. Until Damon was ready to put someone ahead of what he wanted or needed, or even ahead of Elena he would be doomed.

He had always pretended that nothing could hurt him, he was the great Damon Salvatore and nothing could ever really affect him, especially after the whole Katherine debacle. But hearing Bonnie, say that she didn't want to save him, it hurt-it hurt like hell. Never did he think he'd see the day when Bonnie gave up on him. And it hurts like someone had shot him in the heart with vervain.

He grabs a flute of champagne and holds it up in mock salute for a toast. "You wanted to hurt me, well congratulations." He says pausing to stare forward at her crestfallen face. She was beautiful even while broken. "Now if you excuse me, I'm gonna go home and throw myself a party drenched in debauchery." He says winking forward as he turns around. He can hear the sound of heartbeat, it beating fast and erratic and he doesn't know if she's more hurt or disappointed.

I let out a breath and feel the first prickle of tears. Even though he had hurt me, it was still killing me to hear the cutting edge of his voice. It was the voice he had used on me when we were not so friendly, the same voice that had cut me with harsh words and made me feel like crap, and knowing that- that Damon was back, hurt because it meant that the Damon I thought I knew behind the blue eyes, behind the false bravado had already slipped away. "Damon." I call not being able to stop myself and to my surprise he stops.

"Enjoy the party Bonnie." He says turning around to face her. "Because I know I sure as hell will." He says walking off to talk to a pretty girl across the room. He doesn't have to look to know that her eyes are on him, and when the girl whispers if he wants to get out of here, he tosses a look in the direction of bright green eyes, winks and then disappears.

I watch brokenly before making a beeline to the door. Maybe being here was a bad idea. I hadn't been able to find Mason and I was tired of going round circles with Damon. I just wanted one night of fun, one night without baggage, I didn't get my wish.

Im too busy trying to escape through the courtyard that I run something or someone rather hard. Looking up I catch sight of Mason. " Going so soon?" He asked removing his mask and rewarding me with a toothy grin.

My eyes had shot up at the mere sound of his voice and when I had finally saw him, I just wanted him to take me away. Mason had the ability to make everything right, he made me forget, and sometimes I needed an escape. "Mason." I say my voice coming out in a shaky whisper. Since that night in Purgatory Mason had always been here when I needed him, sometimes I wondered if he really were my prince charming or if I were just attaching myself to him because he made me feel special.

With his hands buried deep into his pockets he eyed the flustered girl. The picture she painted was that of beauty, the silver moonlight casting a glow on her bronze skin making her a sight for sore eyes. She looked so sad, and cursed himself for not taking a stand by having her on his arm tonight. She had insisted that she hadn't wanted any trouble for him, but he could deal with Damon, and he planned on being someone in her life so he was bound to deal with the elder Salvatore again at some point. If she had been his date, tonight she would have been at his side all night and he wouldn't be looking at a broken girl.

I licked my lips as my eyes looked at his sudden outstretched hand before taking it, only for him to quickly pull me to him. When I was around Mason I felt safe, I felt like nothing and no one could hurt me, especially Damon. "I'm better now that you're here." I admit while his palm caresses my face. Although I was sure that I needed some time alone to get my mind right, it was nice to have someone whom I knew I could talk to and who genuinely just wanted to make me happy.

"You look beautiful tonight, I bet every guy had their eyes on you." He says as he blue-green eyes trace all over her face before traveling further south as if to get the full picture. He smiled when their eyes met and she rewarded him with her own very toothy grin.

I winked at him, "I only wanted to get the attention of one guy." I say causing Mason to let out a growl as he tugged me even closer. Mason was uncomplicated and it was nice to be around someone who didn't just take at every chance but gave as well.

He dips his head closer to her face grins openly at the sound of her hitched breath. "In that case mission accomplished, Ms. Bennett." He says pausing. "How about we get out of here, we can hop on my bike and go the grill and play darts, just the two of us." pause. He smiled that all to self assured smile. "They wont even know I'm gone." he says looking around to see that everyone was indeed inside the mansion. He had hired people as security the place was safe, and he could spend the rest of the night doing something better then hosting a party that had announced his return to the forefront of his family.

I fixed him with a playful look. "Now Mason, you can't possibly play hookie from your own party." I say playfully to Mason. I felt a swarm of butterflies float around in my stomach when he kissed my hand.

"I can and I will, all you have to do is say the word, and we'll leave." he says as their eyes meet. He wanted her to know that whatever she needed, anytime she needed it he'd do for her. He felt connected to the fragile girl in his arms. He couldn't describe why, or how but she meant something to him. He liked her, and he wanted to protect her from anything and everything...even herself.

By the tone of his voice I knew he knew what had occurred between me and Damon or at least an inkling, and instead of continuing to party he was here with me, and willing to leave his own party at that for me. "If its okay with you, I'd like to stay here, with you." I say causing him to nod his head.

He nods his head. "Okay but if we're going to stay here, you have to let me take care of you." He says his voice turning husky. He bent his knees and looked directly into her eyes

I bite back a smile and wrapped my own arm around him. "What do you have in mind?" I asked raising a brow. Mason was good for me. He wouldn't hurt me.

He grinned mischievously. What did he have in mind, well her naked was one of the images that had floated in his head. He could see it now, the places his tongue would go, the things he would do. He was going to take care of her. "You'll see" he says unwrapping his arms from around her and leading her back to the house.

**BB-ML**

Currently I was sitting on one the desk in the nearest office with my hands buried deep into his curly hair, while his tongue fluttered against me. With each movement I felt myself getting higher and higher and soon I'd reach for the stars. I bit my lip as his magical tongue swirled around me and soon felt myself shoot for the sky.

When I opened my eyes, I saw Mason standing in front of me a satisfied smirk on his lips. I watched as he boldly licked his lips. My face felt aflame at the way he was looking at me. "You look pleased with yourself." I say my voice coming out breathy. Was it hot in here, I swear it was hot!

He grinned bridging the tiny gap between the two of them. He placed his hands on either side of her hips as she looked up at him. "Trust me. I'm more then satisfied." He says scooping down in hopes of capturing her lips but falling short once the office door swings open revealing Tyler.

"Sorry to interrupt," Tyler says his eyes now on the ground. He was sure if he had walked in minutes, maybe even seconds later he would've seen a hell of a lot more of his uncle and ex girlfriend then he had wanted to see. "It's time for you to make your announcement uncle Mason." He says finally looking over at his uncle.

Cursing he looked at the clock. He hadn't expected to be gone for so long but one taste of Bonnie had never been enough. From the moment he first got a taste of her he knew he was hooked. "Alright." He says his words coming out husky and almost choppy. "I'll be out in a minute, give us a moment." He says turning his eyes back to the girl in front of him.

I felt my face heat up as I locked eyes with Tyler, I would definitely have to explain things, later much later. When Tyler had finally left Mason and me alone, I buried my face in my hands. "Oh my god, we were just caught, by Tyler of all people." I mumble from behind my hands.

He can't help but chuckle, and gently removes her hands from her beautiful face. "It could be worst." He says chuckling.

I send a playful glare his way. "This is not funny. This is embarrassing." I say swatting his arm while he continues to laugh my way.

He once again licks his lips. "It's a good thing he didn't come in two minutes later because the plans I had for you." He says huskily.

I roll my eyes playfully. "Get your head out the gutter, you've got a speech to give." I remind, causing him to groan.

**BB-BB**

After parading around the masquerade party with Mason I had soon found myself with a headache of all headaches. I hadn't drank nearly as much as most people at the party so it was odd that my head was hurting so much. With a soft whisper I excused myself from Mason and his company hoping that fresh air would help ease the throb of pain in my head. I had yet to see Stefan all night and briefly wondered if he were okay. And as for Damon, the last time we had spoke had been really bad.

I had found myself walking outside hoping the fresh air would ease some of the pressure inside of my head and most importantly rid me of the sudden dizziness. My eyes are looking to the sky when I realize something is off. The sounds of loud chants are echoing through my head. When I open my eyes, everything is black. Almost blindly I make my way back indoors.

Something was wrong. Something was very wrong! I felt like someone was plucking at my insides, peeling apart my skin as if they were trying to wear it. My head felt like it was on fire and all I could do was cry out. I silently called out for the one person that could possibly help me right now, though it was a long shot. We had shared a blood bond when we were together as Damon had claimed me as his mate. Now we would forever be able to reach out to each other if needed. "_Damon_" I call again before everything goes black.

_Dream_

_The setting is dark and eerie. I look to the sky to see that it is a blue black color and shiver at the mere sound of thunder. I had always hated rain storms. The first rain drops fall down on me as I navigate through an almost endless maze. As I get further and further into the maze I notice the rain is getting harder and harder._

"_Hello, can anyone hear me." I say to the wind only to have it howl back at me._

_Despite my discomfort I continue to walk through the endless maze. It had been a long time since _

_I had been lead somewhere and I had a feeling that their was a reason why I was here and more importantly why getting here had been so violent. I had never felt that kind of pain before which meant whatever I was being led to uncover was important._

_I feel like I've been walking for ages, as I continue to navigate through the maze and then when I'm about to lose hope, I see something, a woman who is lying in a glass coffin. Instantly I run her way hoping to release her from the confines. It only then that I see who the woman is..It's my mother. I shut my eyes hoping that maybe it's a mirage only to see my mother still in the glass coffin. Without much of a thought I open the glass and that's when her eyes open._

_Suddenly the rain started pouring down harder on the two of us, the distant roar of thunder caused me to shiver. I felt like eyes were watching the two of us and dared to look back only to see that we're alone. The rain is heavy pelting my face and causing me hair to stick to my face, and my clothes to become drenched. It reminds me of the night my mother had left us, the rain had been like this, the only difference was that it had been a hot summer night._

"_Bonnie." My mother calls cupping her hands onto my face. I turn to look at her and she looks so scared so frightened and I wish I could help. "We don't have much time." She says her hands roaming my face yet again. "I need you to help me, I don't have much strength left and" she looks around as if looking for something...or someone._

_I couldn't form words. It had been a long time since I had seen my mother. In fact the night she left was the last I had heard from her, she hadn't contacted me on birthdays or holidays at all she had gone radio silent. That was also the time my father had turned away. My father had always been a loving man, especially to me but after my mother had left he was cold a bitter and at times it was like the mere sight of me had cause him to recoil. "Mom, what's going on?"_

_Alexandria held her hand up to silence her daughter. Time was running out fast. "First you need to know that I love you and always will. Just because I no longer wanted to be with your father, didn't mean I wanted to lose you. Doesn't mean I loved you any less." She says as tears fall from her eyes. _

_I crossed my arms over my chest. "Why did you bring me here?"_

"_Your father trapped me here Bonnie. Im stuck here stuck in this maze while my body is comatose." she says pausing. "Your father is not what he seems, when you were little I had decided that I no longer wanted to be with your father, he told me if I dared to leave he would make sure that I had no contact with you. Little did I know that first time I left he cursed me. When I left him again, it reactivated the curse and thus trapped me here. I need you to find the spell and wake me up, because I'm not strong enough to fight him here." she says pausing. "You have to trust him, together you all will wake me." _

Just as my mother was about to continue her words a flash of lightning occurred and before I knew it I heard someone calling my name, and soon I was opening my eyes to stare at methane flame blue eyes.

"Damon" I say a lazy smile forming on my lips. "You came." I say my voice coming out in a whisper.

He gazed down at her and felt a knot in the center of his body. He had been so scared. He had heard her calling for him and immediately thought the wolf was getting rough. When he finally found her, she had been lying on the floor and many scenarios had gone through his head. He had tried waking her the old fashion"Of course I came." he says still cradling her tiny body in his arms. Before she had awaken he was ten seconds from sprinting to the manor. He had already fed her blood and if she had died...then at least she'd be semi alive by being a vampire.

I smiled his way noticing the look of horror on his face and reached up to touch his face. I wanted to assure him that I was okay. I felt weak even though I was positive that Damon had fed me his blood, the aftertaste was still on my tongue. But otherwise I was fine. "I thought you left...I thought you wouldn't save me because you were mad at me." I say honestly.

He shakes his head denying anything of the sort. He may have been upset by her words but the moment he heard her voice inside of his head, he came running. Bonnie had always said that he never tried to save her that he never could save her and for once he didn't want to let her down. "You scared me. When I couldn't reach you." he choked. "I thought I lost you." He says holding her to his chest.

He had never been more scared in his life then the moment he had seen her body lying on the floor, and even now with her in his arms he felt like it wasn't real. He licked his lips and touched her cheek.

"Bonnie." He calls.

I knew what he was about to say and quickly interrupted him. " I saw my mom." I say feeling as if I just licked sam paper. "She cast a spell bringing us together. She needs me." I say, closing my eyes for the briefest moments.

He was positive whatever had happen to her, whatever had caused her to black out wasn't good, Most importantly he was sure that it was affecting her. Bonnie hadn't seen her mother in a very long time, and for her to think she had seen her while blacked out worried him. "Come on, let me take you back to the boarding horse I need to get you away from here." He says looking down, only to find himself mesmerized by her eyes. "You need more blood, your paling." He says quickly ripping into his wrist and placing it on her lips. She must have felt horrible because she had easily suckled the wound. Glacier blue eyes met with forest green eyes and it was like time the first time he had seen her, really seen her all over again.

A voice sounded causing their eye contact to break. It was the wolf.

"What the fuck are you doing to her!" Mason Lockwood bellowed angrily.

"Mason!" I say alarmed. I had never seen Mason Lockwood so insanely mad in my life and right now he was mad. His normal blue-green eyes were starting to mix together and I saw the inner beast inside come to the surface as his eyes turned golden. The full moon was days away and we all knew what happened during full moons.

"Get away from her." He says making a move to lounge forward only to be stopped by non other then Stefan Salvatore who had appeared almost out of nowhere.

"Are you crazy-she's in his arms!" Stefan stresses while holding back the wolf.

He catches eyes with his brother only momentarily before turning his attention to Bonnie. Right now he was just as suspicious as Mason was when it came to Damon, however he could smell blood and more importantly he could see that Bonnie had the residue on her lips, meaning Damon had fed her his blood but why. Inwardly he cringed, just thinking about the repercussions. Bonnie and Damon had already bonded together while they had been together, they shared blood multiple times and the fact that once again Bonnie was being fed his brothers blood made him wonder what exactly happen and who was to blame. The one thing he did know, was that if either Damon or Mason had hurt Bonnie heads were about to roll because he was not in the mother fucking mood tonight.

A growl emitted the wolfs throat as he fought against the grey eyed vampire. "Of course you would defend him. He's your brother." He all but snarls. "If you hurt her, I'll kill you." Mason growls.

Stefan grips harder on the wolf, "trust me if anyone had earned the right to kill my brother it's me" he says addressing the wolf before turning his eyes back to his brother. "If you're the reason, she's hurt that attack I did a couple of days ago will have nothing on what I'll do next."

"Stefan." I call causing his grey eyes to reach mine.

"Did he hurt you Bonnie? Are you okay?" Stefan asks brows furrowed broodingly.

I send a smile in the direction of both Mason and Stefan. "I'm fine. I promise." With the help of Damon, I rise to my feet only to stand in the middle of three supernatural men, which was not ideal for me. I catch eyes with Stefan silently letting him know that its okay to let go of Mason and then glance back at Damon using our link to speak to him. "_He's worried about me, please don't do anything._" I said feeling like I had too many pixie sticks. Sharing blood...tasting his blood had always affected me. Sometimes it had me wired other times it had left me wanting nothing but him, right now I felt like a jittery mess.

He grimaces "_so am I, so is Stefan_."

I effectively closed our link when Mason looked over at me almost expectantly, I wondered if he had said anything and looked over to Stefan who looked mildly amused. I had assumed that he had guessed that Damon and I had been talking telepathically. Breaking away from the hold Damon had on my arm, I went to Mason who quickly crushed me to his chest. I had almost forgotten how warm he was, especially compared to Damon.

It was then that I realized that a moment that was very private was suddenly being witnessed by two people who didn't need to see it. I took a step from Mason still close enough to touch him but not entwined as much as possible. I could feel eyes on the back of me and I knew that it was time I faced the other supernatural in the room. I looked to Stefan who had his arms crossed in front of his chest. I could tell just by looking at him that he was really worried about me and I had made a mental note to explain everything to him later...much later. Out of the corner of my eye I also spotted Damon who was wearing a bored expression, which usually meant he was anything but bored. I had a feeling that something had changed and that something was a big thing. "Guys could you give me and Mason a minute." I say to no avail.

"Bonnie you know I can't do that till you tell me what happen." Stefan says as he stands against the door arms folded in front of his chest.

I sighed not really wanting to delve into everything that had happen but knowing that in order

"My mother used a spell to contact me." I say causing the men in the room to blink forward. "I guess she was channeling me, and in order for to do so, I went through a lot of pain. My head felt like it was going to explode and my body had been weak. I was scared and didn't know what was going on so I called out for Damon telepathically and he came." I said looking back to Damon and then looking back at Mason. "He helped me."

Blue eyes met with grey from across the room as he mimicked his brothers stance. Stefan didn't look too pleased but who cared, Bonnie was okay and that was all that mattered right now, and if Alexandria Bennett had dared to make contact with Bonnie in a way that had caused her daughter pain, their was no telling what she would do next. "Yeah so both of you can stop acting like I'm the bad guy.' he says smirking. "If it weren't for me being able to hear Bonnie, who knows what would have happen, she was weak and scared and without the help of my blood we have no idea what condition she'd be in." He says looking over at the wolf. "Your welcome" he says a smirk on his lips.

I shot Damon a glare, on the verge of elbowing him in the side. He was wearing his typical shit eating grin and as usual he wasnt making things any better, only worst. "Really Damon, now is not the time to start shit!" I say causing him to stop provoking both Mason and Stefan.

Now it was Stefans turn to speak. "Of course you fed her your blood." Stefan gripes annoyed already. "You'll do anything to get her back and like always you'll use the situation to your advantage" Stefan says knowingly.

For his part Damon had listened to Stefan and Mason moan and groan for long enough. Mason was just jealous over the fact that he wasnt the person who had ridden in on his big white horse and save Bonnie. He was pathetic and a waste of time. As for Stefan, the root of all of his problems laid with Elena and nothing, would ever appease Stefan, not that he gave a shit anyways. "I helped her when she needed someone and if you didn't have your hand in Kats cookie jar-maybe you could have done it." He snaps causing dark veins to appear on his younger brothers face.

Grey eyes turn in the direction of me as Stefan speaks. "Bons, you know what this means right?"

I shifted from one foot to the other. It was common knowledge at least to the people who really knew about my relationship with Damon that we had formed a link between the two of us by sharing blood, the more time we shared the closer we got and since I had been cold turkey for the last couple of months; who knows how I would react. "It'll only be in my system for a day." I remind Stefan. "And once it passes everything will go back to normal." I say looking from to Stefan back to Damon.

"Are you sure about that?" Mason asks causing me to look his way. I could see the doubt in his eyes, in his face he didn't trust Damon and normally I wouldn't trust him either; but I saw the look in his face when I woke up, for the first time ever Damon appeared to be putting someone ahead of himself.

"Yeah" I say easily. Damon and I had shared a moment but knew that once his blood left my system, everything would go back to normal and the connection I felt with him would fade away just like everything else.

Mason clinched his fist, while looking at the devil. "How do we know you weren't working with someone who cast the spell. For all we know you did this to get closer to Bonnie." He says walking over to the blue eyed devil. He had known all about Damon Salvatore- he was in a sense Katherines protégée and he'd be damned if he let Bonnie go down the path with Damon that he had gone with Katherine.

Damon smirks. "I don't owe you jack shit Lockwood but just so you know. I'd never hurt Bonnie that way."

Mason chuckled "Says that man who screwed her best friend."

I let out a gasp and suddenly I see three supernatural men about to fight. "Stop" I say causing the three men to halt their movements.

"She's right." Stefan sighs out. "The important thing is that Bonnie is fine-nothing else matter right now, other than her well being." Stefan says causing me to wink in his direction. He returns my wink as well.

Soon Mason is in front of me his blue/green eyes imploring. "You look exhausted Bon." Mason says his hands roaming all over my face as if he was still surprised that I was standing, or in his arms. He looked at me with such devotion that I felt a twinge of guilt for wanting to be closer to Damon. I knew it was his blood drawing me closer to him but still at the heart of everything it was all the same. I had always been drawn to Damon and right now I felt closer to him-closer then I had felt in a very long time.

"I am." I admit with a yawn. My body felt weird like it was adjusting to being back here in the real world.

"Well then it's settled then, we'll shut down the party and you'll stay here with me...I'll take care of you." He says while looking into deep green eyes. He hugs her closer to him placing a chaste kiss to her forehead.

I smiled his way in awe. For the first time someone was finally putting me first and it was Mason Lockwood. "But this night is important to you."

He quirks a smile not giving a damn, who heard him "You're important to me."

From his position across the room he watched and nearly choked on his own vomit. He could only take so much of this crap. Mason had strode in here acting like he was ready to save the day but the joke had been on him, because the day had been saved and not by the wolf but by him. "I hate to break up this oh so touching moment." He says while clutching his hand to his heart.

"Damon." Stefan warned.

"Damon" I echoed my tone warning him to not do this at least not right now.

He smirked. "Sorry kids no can do." He said with a fake pout. " Bonnie can't stay with you tonight." He says as all eyes look at him. Stefan rolls his eyes but he knew that Stefan knows this is the best thing for everyone. And Bonnie, she looks like she doesn't know how she feels about the bomb he had just dropped. As for Mason, he looked ready to erupt. For once he had been given a break and he had to thank Alexandria Bennett for that. Although if she had ever dared to hurt Bonnie he'd raise hell.

Mason glared at the vampire gritting his teeth while the man spoke so freaking confidently. He thought he could do anything and everyone would just sit back and abide by his rules, no fucking way. "You have no say in this ex-boyfriend. This is between Bonnie and me- so stay out of it."

He quirked a grin. "I can't, you see Bonnie has her blood in my system which means she's in my custody for 24 hrs." He says smugly. "You know just a precaution in case something happens." He says almost giddy while he watched the wolfs eyes change from blue to green to yellow.

He was waiting for the wolf to touch him because then all bets were off. He wanted to beat the skin off the overgrown dog and then run away with Bonnie. But then again he was sure if he dared to hurt the wolf, it would only make Bonnie run further away from him.

"Mason." I call placing my hands on his cheeks. I count to ten hoping to keep the beast at bay. I can tell that he's beyond angry and that he's fighting the animal inside of him so I whisper words of encouragement. The full moon is only days away and I know that although he wouldn't change he still had super strength and I didn't want to see him hurt. "It's only for one night." I say biting my lip.

When he calmed down he whispers to her although he knows the nosey vampires who are still in the room can hear. "He's going to use this as an opportunity to get under your skin."

I hug him and out of the corner of my eye spot Damon looking over at me. "I can handle Damon." I say pressing a kiss to his cheek.

Mason soon hugs me to him and out of the corner of my eye I catch sight with Damon. I could handle him, I have handled him before and this time is no different. That was a lie everything had changed. For the first time ever, Damon had saved me, he had come to my rescue at that changed everything.


	10. Chapter 9

**A.N.: Hey all im back with another chapter of Jagged Edges! I'm so glad you all enjoyed the last chapter! Good things are coming up and lots of drama! This chapter has been written for a bit I've gone back and forth with it but in the end I decided to keep everything. So I hope you like it!**

Special thanks to: jewelsstars, randomlittleme, StillStacie, Guest, babyshan211

xoxo

queena

* * *

><p>"<em>Love breaks the chains, Love aches for every one of us, Love takes the tears and pain, and turns it into the beauty that remains"<em>

**Chapter 9: Alone Together**

The ride from the mansion to the Salvatore compound was met in silence. It had been one wild night that I had cared to never ever recapture again. I had ridden back with Stefan who had looked at me more then he had looked at the road. I had spent most of my time listening to Stefan as he had warned me about Damon. It appeared he didn't trust his brother any more then Mason had trusted him. However, Stefan didn't see the look on his face. When I had finally, came to, Damon had looked scared and vulnerable and that was something I had hardly seen. In fact if I recall correctly the last time, I had seen him so open without all the bravado had been the night we had found Stefan after being tortured. That night had started the fire that had later burned us and ironically that was the first time that we had slept together and it was more then just something to do.

"What are you going to do about your mother?" Stefan asks noticing the far off look in her eyes. He had recognized that look, he had seen it before and she had only gotten it while thinking of Damon. He had wanted nothing more then protect Bonnie from the mistake he was sure she would make-but right now he knew her head was a jumbled mess and her heart had only beat his brothers tune.

"I dunno" I say scrubbing my hands over my face. "I want to help her, to save her but" I say pausing as I looked out the window. "I'm afraid of what I'll find when I go looking not only through my fathers spell book but when delve into everything." I say unsteady.

It was shock to be pulled into another dimension where my mother had claimed she had been held captive due to a spell my father had cast on her. And what made things so much worst was that they're something so honest about my mother that made me want to further delve into her story. My father had changed once she had left us, he had been colder then usual and had finally given up the facade of a "happy family." I didn't want to believe that my father would go as far as to hold my mother captive while in a comatose state, but I couldn't think of any other reason my mother would summon me.

He rests his hand on her leg. "You know that I'll help any way you need. You'll never be alone Bons. I'll always be here."

I smile his way. My mother had said that hid a diary somewhere in my room, hoping that one day I would read it and know everything about my father and about her. She had also said that soon help would send me in the right direction. I was afraid of what I would find, but the one thing that had kept me level headed was that I knew Stefan had my back, he would be a great asset to my search.

**BS**-**BS**

Twenty minutes later we've arrived to the Salvatore manor. As Stefan and I climb the stairs we pass Damon who is busy drinking a glass of scotch. For a moment our eyes meet and I feel tingles throughout my body everywhere his eyes have scanned. He quirks a smirk and I soon avert my eyes and continue to listen to Stefan as he proceeds to tell me why Batman is so much cooler then Superman. He had seen the new Batman movie and was going on and on about how great it was. In fact according to Stefan it was so great that we needed to lock ourselves in his bedroom for the next 24hrs and watch all of the films.

When we arrive to his room, I plop on the bed feeling high as a kite. It reminded me the time I had to be put under to get my tooth pulled. I hated the dentist and swore that place was evil but I had to admit, that gas they gave me had made me feel like I could touch the sky. The feeling I felt now was similar and I knew it was the effect of having vampire blood in my system.

"Your starting to get color back in your cheeks, which is good, you were as pale as me earlier." Stefan says while tossing his suite jacket on the bed.

I shot him a playful glare. "So you're saying I looked like death then?" I question before lying back in his bed. I had already showered and changed into my pajamas. Lucky for me I still had a room that Stefan had given me long before I started seeing his brother, and that room had included a plethora of my clothes- not to mention that clothes I had left in Damons room.

He cracks a grin. "Pretty much!" he says looking over at her. "How are you feeling?" he questions. While placing his cold hands on her forehead. Whenever a witch was summoned the side effects could vary and he just wanted to make sure that Bonnie was okay. The color was starting to return to her usually glowing skin. And she hadn't run a fever or gotten the chills, so- so far so good.

"I'm fine." I say sitting up and pointing to a costume in the far left corner of the room. I raise an eyebrow and Stefan actually blushes. "Oh my god!" I nearly shriek. "Katherine really does bring out the freak in you!" I say with a giggle. I was a fan of dress up, myself, it added spice.

He pens her with a gaze. "You're one to talk I've seen you naked so many times you'd think I'd have you memorized." he left out the fact that after hearing how much fun she and Damon had-had while playing dress up during their sexapades had peaked his curiosity.

I ignored his tone. "Where's Katherine, I thought the two of you were stuck like glue?"

He inclined his head to the side. "She'll be over later, she knew that you were my first priority."

I smiled his way. "Aww b.f. you don't have to take care of me." I say winking at him.

"Yes I do.' He says noticing the way her green eyes are basically glowing. Bonnie was high on blood, Damons blood and he feared the moment he left the two of them alone, the blood running through her system that had only intensified the chain link between them would cause her to run in the arms of the worst possible person for her. "Damon fed you his blood Bonnie, and we both know what could happen- if I left the two of you alone." He says trailing off. He knew that Bonnie and Mason had been dating for the last couple of weeks, he also knew that she was finally starting to get back to the normal Bonnie, perhaps that Bonnie before Damon. And it scared him to know that she could have a relapse because then he'd wonder about his own sobriety when it came to not only his brother but to Elena as well.

I swallow hard at his implication. Stefan was afraid for me, and in the back of my mind I wondered if having Damons blood in my system would relight the spark that was between us? With every second that passed I felt the pull of Damon, before I had shut it off and since we hadn't shared blood for a long time everything with him had felt like a dull ache, but now I felt him crawling beneath my skin and I knew that at least for the next 24 hrs I would have to deal with things that I had refused to deal with before. Damon had helped me when I needed him, and now that my senses were much more keen, and my emotions were magnified I knew that I needed to finally put an end to this mess we had created. The pain that I had felt by his betrayal was still at the surface but I was ready to just let it go because I had more important things to worry about like how I was going to help my mother.

"Everything is gonna be okay." I say letting out a shaky breath and running my shaking hands through my hair. Stefan soon hugs me to his body and I feel myself shaking. For the first time in a really long time I was terrified, Damon was my addiction and if I relapsed it might just be the end of me.

**BB-DS**

It was late and as expected he was alone again. He had hoped that since Bonnie had come home with him, that the two of them might get a chance to straighten things out but to no avail. As always Stefan had whisked the emerald eyed beauty away to his room, where they did all the things that grated on his nerves, to the wee hours of the night. If he were honest with himself

he had been disappointed that his blood hadn't had a stronger effect on her. Right now he felt like he was about to jump out of his skin-it felt good knowing that a part of him was still flowing within her and he wanted nothing more then rediscover everything that was the two of them.

The distant sound of shuffling feet on hardwood caught his attention and soon the smell of vanilla and cinnamon hit his nostrils. Drink in hand he tried to pretend that he wasn't affected by the fact that they were finally alone together but to no avail. His fingertips were beginning to twitch and he wanted nothing more then to yank him to her. "Shouldn't you be resting, or continuing to hide away in Stefans room." He says with his back to her before taking a generous sip out of his glass.

"I wasn't hiding.' I say rather defensively. I can tell by the way he'd looked at me that he doesn't believe my story and to be honest, I don't believe it either.

He raised his brows briefly before meandering over to the bar. She was nervous, he could tell just by looking at her. He could also feel the shift. For the first time in a long time she couldn't block out her feelings for him and he felt it, in spades. Her walls were slowly falling down despite their earlier words and for once it didn't have anything to do with Stefan. This had everything to do with the link they had found within each other so long ago.

"Here, you look like you might need this." He says handing her the glass. His hands linger for one second too long causing their fingertips to brush against each other, and it's like someone has lit a fire inside of his body. The torch that had never really went out for him has been lit again and he can tell by her sudden gasp that it's the same for her as well. Her eyes are lit up like the fourth of July and he was sure his eyes were just as bright.

"Thanks." I say scrambling away from him. It felt like the room was way to small which was absurd especially since the manor was huge. That still didn't help me from feeling like the walls were closing in on me. Sometimes when I was near Damon it was like we were the only two people in the world, the only two people that mattered but that was a lie. I take a sip of the amber liquid as Damon continues to look my way.

"You look better." he says as he merely glances her way before choosing to ignore her. He is resisting the urge to gawk at her, its been a long time since he's seen her like this.

I let out a sigh. I must have looked like hell earlier. "I feel better and before you ask...I'm fine." I say from my position across the room from him. I needed to put as much space between me and Damon because when we were like this, one look was all it took for something to start all over again.

"Of course you are." He says eyes wide. "Your Bonnie, you're invincible, nothing can break you not even the fact that your mother pulled you into another dimension only to tell you that your father is evil and trapped her in said dimension leaving her body in a comatose state." his says in one breath. "Its like an episode of _Port Charles_." he exaggerates with widen eyes and hand gestures.

He was doing that thing again, that thing where he thought he knew me better the I knew myself. "Thanks for the summary Damon." I say sarcastically causing him to actually smile my way. "As for breaking me- you certainly did try didn't you?" I question a brow lifted.

He was waiting for the other shoe to drop, he just thought it would come later...much later-like during the afterglow. His head hung low. "If I could take it back.."

"You can't" I say cutting him off. I ran my hands though my hair. Coming down here was a mistake, but I really just wanted to thank him for helping me. I also wanted to tell him that I didn't hate him. But like always we had gotten off track. I pressed my lips together closing my eyes before opening them and looking at Damon. "Listen I didn't come here to fight with you...I just wanted to say thank you." I say turning on my heel.

He lets out a scuff. "Running away again?" he says causing her to stop her movements. They had started out running away from each other and even now they were still running. The only difference was that she was running away from him instead of the other way around.

I clicked my tongue and folded my arms over my chest. I knew that this would probably be a bad idea...being so close to Damon especially with his blood still in my system. The two of us weren't novices when it came to blood sharing and part of me was afraid of what this could bring, I felt drawn to him and it was like my own body was betraying me, and his blood was manipulating the situation and my mind like it had done so many times before. "I wasn't running." I say slanting my eyes his way. I had come and said what I needed to say and now I needed to go call the guy I had been seeing. Mason, had been incredible to me, and I wanted to be just as good to him as he had been to me.

"Your lying." he says his eyes going wide as he walks closer to her. He could see it in her eyes, she was scared, scared of what could happen since they were finally alone and that was the reason she had been hiding from him. What scared her most, was the fact that for once he had saved her. Earlier tonight she had claimed that the only thing she ever wanted was for him to save her, and he had done just that. "You're afraid of being around me because you know." he says reaching out to stroke her face. "With my blood running through you-you can't lie...not to yourself." he says trailing his hand down her face to her neck " And not to me." he says holding her gaze.

I lifted my chin up. "I don't lie." I say causing him to chuckle. "Unlike you I'm honest." I say taking a much needed step back. My head was beginning to feel fuzzy again and I was beginning to think it was being so close to Damon. I felt like I had just gone spinning on the teacups and I knew it was because he was so close, it was like his eyes had me under a spell.

He watched as she tried to put her game face on but failed. He knew she felt it, especially now. He was smart enough to know that engaging in a fight with her was probably hazardous but he liked to play with fire. "Here is me being honest." he says pausing as she looks at him with those striking green eyes. "I'm not over you." he says honestly. "And when I saw you lying on the floor it made me realize how much I really do love you."

I closed my eyes, this was what I didn't need. I had a lot of things on my mind, number one being the fact that my mother had used me a vessel. Number 2 )Mason, I really liked him, like really, really liked him and I didn't want to ruin it. 3) being the feelings that I thought were long buried being brought to the surface due to my heightened senses. "Damon." I say weakly I was hanging on by a thin thread. "Please" I say halting his movements.

He wants to further probe her for answers he wants to remind her that she called for him

"No" he says halting her movement. "You called for me Bonnie...me, their was a reason why you thought of me before you blacked out."

I threw my hands up in the air, what part of I didn't want to fight did he not get. "Damon I don't want to fight with you." I say again my voice wavering.

_Maybe this is heaven sent_

_Maybe this is as good as it gets_

_Maybe this is everything you need and more_

_all that I've been looking for_

"Good." he says approaching her figure. He's standing behind her, close enough to touch. "Contrary to popular belief don't want to fight with you either." he says pausing to listen to the beat of her heart. "I thought I lost you...but you're here with me." he says placing an open mouth kiss to her neck.

I closed my eyes while getting lost in the feeling of being swept up in his arms. Damon had the ability to send me on rocket ship soaring above earth but when I came crashing down, it was always hard and always hurt. I turn around in his arm as our eyes meet. "I came here because your blood is in my system we made the rule about blood for a reason." I say softly. I didn't owe Damon an explanation especially since he was the one that had insisted I come back here because of our rule about those ingesting vampire blood.

"You could have been upstairs with Stefan or in your room" he points out expertly. He knew Bonnie and if she didn't want to do something she didn't do it. And that meant she wanted to be here with him. "But you came down here to be with me." he says bringing his voice down to a shocking whisper. "Because you know, right here is where you belong and nothing can change that...not even Mason Lockwood." he says pulling back to observe her face.

_So let me love you, with all that I got_

_Let me love you_

I push at his chest. "I don't belong to you!" I say annoyed. "I never did!"

He nods his head while walking in her direction. When she bumps into the nearby table he pens her by putting his body nearly on top of her. He places his hands on either side of the small table trapping her. The only way to get through to Bonnie, had always been by showing her. She had always said actions speak louder then words and he'd show her in due time. "Maybe not, but you belong with me and that scares you."

I push at his chest, and soon walk away from him. "Shut up ok!" I say almost hysterical. " If it weren't for me having your blood in my system I would be as far away from you as possible. I would be with Mason right now." I say causing him to roll his eyes. It was the truth, I may have cared for Damon but I had no intention of going back to him. "Its messing with me and making me feel like I need you...like I'm still connected to you but it's a facade." I say in hysterics!

Now he does laugh at her. If their bond was such a facade, if their love was such a facade she wouldn't have called out to him in her time of need. "What you feel is real, its everything you try to block out." he says matter of fact. " And if you don't believe me, just remember before you blacked out you called for me because I'm the one in your heart." he says marching over so that he standing right in front of her.

"You can lie to everyone but you can't lie to me." he says fiercely.

_Maybe there are some things I might put you through_

_maybe we should do the things lovers do_

I lick my lips ready to retort his words and before I know it Damon is kissing me passionately and I'm...I'm kissing him back. The kisses are all too consuming yet at the same time slow. With every thrust of our tongues, I feel the fire, the slow simmer of the fire that will burn us both in the end. My head is telling me that this is dangerous situation that needs to be aborted but the sound of my heart beating is so loud that it nearly silences all thoughts in my head.

_So let me love with all I got_

_let me hold, touch you _

_tease you, please you_

My hands running through his hair as he lifts me. My legs cross around his waist and I tilt my head to the side as he continues to suck at a particular soft spot. I let out a moan before pulling his face back up to mine so that our lips can dance. It feels so good, everything feels so good...so good.

_Let me love you_

_with all that I got_

He pulls back letting her catch her breath. Her eyes are glowing again and he realizes that they are his favorite color. "God I've missed you." he says gazing at her kiss swollen lips. It felt damn good to have her in his arms. To know her heart and feel it beating for him. He knew she had loved him, and nothing could sever that love. Her green eyes are glowing like nothing he's ever seen. When her lips connect with his adams apple he resists the urge to moan. And when her nails rake through his scalp he's seconds away from throwing her down on the ground and doing what they've both been waiting for since breaking up. The only problem was that he wanted it to be special. Their first time had been on the floor which wasn't romantic at all, this time he had a chance at getting things right.

_Let me love with all that I got_

_let me love you, from the top the bottom_

_bottom to the top_

Blindly he menders the stairs to his room, while his lips are still connected to hers. She smells wonderful and he's sure that Stefan has gotten an earful but he doesn't care because this is between he and Bonnie. They still had _it_, and _it_ was bringing them together. Kicking the door shut behind him and pushes her against the wall. He lips travel the length of her neck before dipping to her tank top, his mouth latched onto chocolate morsel before traveling upwards. He menders the two of them to his bed and just as her body hits the mattress he's on top of her...worshiping every amount of exposed skin. He wants to kiss her everywhere, touch her everywhere "I'll spend the rest of the night making up for my mistakes." he says hotly against her skin. He's sure she's high off his blood and he's high off of her eyes, her smell, everything that is her.

_Let me love you_

Everything is moving so fast, I let out a hiss when he boldly runs a finger at the seam of me. He dares to tug at my pink and black short shorts. The words _no_ are only whisper away when our eyes meet. Temptation is calling out for me, in the form of sinister blue eyes. I stare up at his eyes that are glowing. Not so gently I tug him forward peppering kisses along his jaw. His cold hands run under my tank as his blue eyes sparkle with this light I hadn't seen in so long. He soon swoops down again capturing my mouth in a hot greedy kiss. His hands are everywhere and the sound of my heartbeat is getting louder and louder. I can feel his hands skating across me as my breath hitches. His knee is lodged between my thighs and I let out a moan when it brushes against me.

_Don't think just feel_. Is what Damon had always said to me and in that moment I could do nothing but feel. I feel like I'm under some kind of spell because everything is so hazy. Vaguely I hear Damon whispering to me in my ear claiming that he'll never let me go. My breath is labored as his hand palms me. I let out whimper and soon I feel the piercing of canines through my skin. The pull of blood has me feeling boneless though some of the haze has disappeared.

"Damon" I half say half moan as his teeth break through my skin. This was something I hadn't expected yet I couldn't run away from it. He gently pulls the blood out causing my body to feel fuzzy. The first time I had been bitten was probably the worst feeling in my life. Even if the vampire tries to be gentle the first time always hurts the most and for me, the first time Damon had bitten me had been in a fit of rage-lets just say it took a very long time for me to let him bite me willingly. Once you've gotten over the first experience you learn that sometimes that biting doesn't feel as bad, in fact it feel good and right now it was feeling damn good...too good.

The sensation is overwhelming it feels like I've been wound so tight that this is the only way to release me and I feel the tell- tell signs of spinning out of control, I'm about to crash and with the crash comes the burn. The feel the familiar flames that come with being with Damon lap at my skin scorching me and I realize that I have to stop this because the flames will soon envelop me.

"Damon s-stop." I say causing him to stop all of his ministrations. His dancing hand has seized its movements at my apex and he soon takes to the task of removing his incisors from my neck.

Pulling back his makes a show of licking the remnants of her blood off of his lips. She taste even better then he remembered and he couldn't wait to taste everything. Soon he would thoroughly sample everything she had to offer and the thought had him licking his chops all over again. "Babe, we were just getting to the good part." he breathes out, while swooping down so that their foreheads are now touching. "Let me love you Bonnie." he whispers while drawing closer to her. He hovers for a moment above her lips, a delighted smile tugging on his mouth as he hears her strangled breath. "Let me love you." he says again this time making a move for her bottom lip. When suddenly she flips him over. He grins up at her, it would always be like this, she was fire and he was ice- the perfect blend. He liked this position better anyway.

"I can't." I say from my position above him...straddling him. "We can't" I say firmly. My hand trails along his face, and I wish he knew what this meant to me, what doing this would mean to me and what turning him down felt like. I knew I would always want him...that I would always love him but this-this was wrong and whatever this was, was a result of him saving me and giving me his blood. I knew better then to go down this route and I wouldn't do it again.

All it took was one taste of his blood and I was already doing things that I should never do. I couldn't believe that this was happening that I had let myself get swept up all over again. This wasn't me, I didn't do things like this yet here I was half naked in front of Damon. Every time I was around him it was like a haze fell over me, and this time was no different we were seconds away from making love..sleeping together and the realization nearly crushed me. I wanted to blame the blood but really it was probably the fact that he had saved me and maybe just maybe the fact that I wasn't completely over him. They had often said that when in life or death situations you tend to cling onto the one thing you know is true, and maybe that was my problem or maybe it was just history repeating itself.

Without much of a word I head straight for the door hoping to erase this moment from my mind. I had a moment of weakness but it wouldn't happen again. Damon was bad for me, he always had been and always would be.

"Bon" he says flashing in front of her halting her further movements. They were in the middle of something, something special. He knew she felt it- he felt it too it was the reason she had held him so tight. The blood may have brought her here but the connection they still had was as vibrant as ever. When they were alone, it was like the world stopped and it was just the two of them. All the bad stuff that he had done, all the anger she felt for him and everything in between melted away the moment he saw her lying on the ground earlier that night. And when he touched her...god when he touched her it was like the first real time all over again.

"Do you realize what we were about to do...what I was about to do?" I say feeling as if my emotions are all over the place. I wanted this damn blood out of me, I wanted to stop feeling what I was currently feeling! I wanted to stop wanting Damon because right now, I just wanted to be wrapped up in his arms, and since he had taken a sip of my blood I felt like we were wrapped up in a cocoon together. All I can think about is what my actions would have done to Mason. I had never wanted to hurt someone the way I had been hurt- yet here I was just about to ruin everything. As far as I was concerned going down the path that Elena had walked and I didn't want that, I never wanted to be that girl.

I looked down at myself I was standing before him in a black tank top that was much shorter then I remembered and shorts that were way too short. I felt exposed and so shameful. The only thing I wanted to do was go home to my own bed and just cry. In fact I was crying and I didn't really realize it till Damon was standing before me, his hands cupping my cheeks.

"We were about to make love...you and me." he says his voice tender. He wanted her she wanted him it should have been easy, yet as always things were difficult.

"And it would have been a mistake." I say while looking into his blue eyes. I see the hurt that flashes through him and that was the last thing I had wanted to do. We had gotten caught up and I had given him false hope. At the same time in this moment I realized I forgave him for what happen and I didn't want him to hurt the way I had hurt after our breakup. Just as I didn't want Mason to hurt as I had hurt either.

"Because you love him?" he questions tragically. He had noticed the way she had lit up at the mention of Mason and tried to ignore it. He thought he had a chance but if Bonnie had loved Mason, if she had realized that she loved him then he was a goner. Mason was everything Bonnie ever wanted and needed and he...he was a screw up.

I suck in a breath. "No. But I care about him a lot." I say simply. I knew I wasn't in love with Mason, I liked him a lot but it wasn't love..not yet. But it could but one day, if I hadn't ruined my chances with him. And as for Damon my heart wouldn't let me let him go. That of course didn't mean we could be together. The blood exchange was playing with my mind, reminding me of vows we had made silently to each other...a love that should've been long forgotten and buried. We weren't star crossed lovers who always missed our chance, we were Bonnie and Damon and a happily ever after story was not in the works for us...it never was.

He breathed a sigh of relief and scooped down and kissed her again. She fought it as always been soon melted into him, opening her mouth to let out a moan just as he snaked his tongue into her mouth. Her hands tugged at his hair digging blunt nails into his scalp. He wrapped his arm around her waist tugging her further against him. They didn't have to do anything she didn't want to do. All that mattered was that she had admitted that she hadn't loved Mason. He knew he still had a shot with her, she just needed time. Her life had been turned upside down all in one night and if needed he'd wait for her to be ready for him again. He waited for Katherine and Elena.

"You have to stop doing that.' I say pushing him away as hard as I can. God this was so freaking wrong on so many levels. Maybe Stefan had been right, maybe I was too weak around Damon and right now I felt my weakest, it was like one look, one touch and I was forgetting about how

we had gotten here. "I mean it Damon." I say placing my hands on his chest to stop him from moving further.

He flashes her a cocky lop sided grin."Why because you love me?"

"Because its not fair to me or to him...and most importantly its not fair to you." I say stepping out of his embrace to sit by the window. "He's good to me you know, he's trustworthy and honest and everything your not." I say chancing a look in his direction to see him staring my way. "I like him, I like him a lot," I say feeling tears prickle my eyes. Being with Mason, around Mason had made me happy and I hadn't been happy in a long time.

From his position now lying on the bed he saw how exhausted she looked. He was sure that the day was finally starting to take its toll on her. Only in Mystic Falls could life change within a blink of an eye. Earlier tonight she had told him that he didn't have a snowballs chance in hell and now the tables had turned in his favor and yet somehow he knew that this would be far from easy. Bonnie wouldn't just come back to him just because he helped her.

He rises to his full height and soon follows her onto the balcony adjoining his room. He watches as she looks out into the night sky and soon stands behind her, carful not to touch her- though he was itching to do so. "He may be everything you need, but no matter what I'll always be the one you really want.' he says pausing to look at her. "There is something between us Bonnie, something strong and it wont go away...even if you want it to."

I looked his way ready to say something- anything to dismiss his words but my words died down in my throat the moment our eyes locked. Maybe he was right, maybe I wasn't being honest with myself. Maybe I would always love him, and maybe he did love me but just because we loved each other...cared for each other, didn't make it okay for us to be together. I sucked in a breath before speaking. "Damon." I say causing him to stop me.

"Me first." he says running his hands hazardously through his disheveled locks. "I know you're going through a lot right now, and I just want you to know that I wont pressure you" he says almost nervously. Here was his chance to be the man she had always wanted him to be and it scared him because he feared if he weren't continuously seeking her out that maybe she would fall for Mason Lockwood.

I searched his eyes trying to see a hint of where he was going with this but found nothing. The thing about Damon was that he was such a master manipulator I never knew when he was being true or not. But something in my gut was telling me this was the real deal. For the first time ever he seemed like Damon was putting me first. "Why now?"

He bends his knees so that they are eye level. "Because I love you." It was odd how at first saying I love you had been the hardest thing he could ever say to her. It was something he had never said before, especially to Bonnie. He had twice. The first time he had erased her memory so she could forget the second time he had laid it out on the line. But with Bonnie it always been difficult to say because he knew she had loved him and with her love and the way he had felt he knew he would ruin it. Now, saying the words were much easier because he knew he had to fight for her.

My heart hammers in my chest at his words. Every other time Damon had told me he loved me it hurt, it always made me feel like he was just saying the words to me to keep me, but for the first time I really believed that he loved me. Despite myself I reached for his hand squeezing it hoping to convey everything without much words. "I should get to bed. Its been a long night." I say releasing his hand and walking back into the bedroom. I know he's on my heels and walk over to the door.

"Bonnie" he calls as she rest her hand on the doorknob. "Stay." he says his words coming out desperate. "I just want to hold you...just for tonight." he says surprised when she turns around. Methane blue meets forest green and before he knows it she's walking over to his bed.

"Just for tonight." I whisper climbing in the bed. I knew that this was probably a bad idea, that it might lead me astray but for right now, it was all I wanted. I was tired, so freaking tired of fighting him, fighting myself...fighting everything. As soon as I lye down, Damon soon follows resting his arms around me as he slides in the back of me. I think he can feel the shift, we can't keep going on like this, somebody has to let go, or we'll never get a chance at happiness.

He presses his lips to her temple relishing in the closeness and soaks up her warmth feeling content and dare he say content! "It feels good doesn't it, being in my arms?" he says holding her hand. "Its almost like we're the only two people in the world?"

After a long moment of silence I speak. "This doesn't change anything." I say with my eyes closed. "Tomorrow everything will go back to normal- you with Elena in your orbit and me with Mason. You'll see everything will be back to normal." I say with a yawn. I was so tired, so so tired.

He says nothing and presses another kiss to the side of her neck. If she thought he was going to let her go after having her so close she was sadly mistaken. He just needed to change his tactics. This time he was going to do everything right, he'd get a chance to start over and maybe just maybe when they got back together he'd be able to keep her this time. Tonight, was indeed the start of something good.

_Maybe there are things you would put me through_

_maybe you were meant for me and I was meant for you_

Song credit: Brian McKnight let me love you and love is

**A.n.2**: I was so skeptical about this chapter, I wanted to show the push pull that is Bamon in a situation where they couldn't deny anything because of the sharing of blood. I hope Damon wasn't too ooc, I tend to believe that once he realizes he's in love he owns it. As for Bonnie, I didn't want her to go to the full extent Elena had gone with Damon, I just wanted to show that she too is flawed as well. I hope you liked it, drop me a line and tell me what you think.


	11. Chapter 10

A.N. Hey all! Wow! I am so blown away by your comments! Thanks for reading and replying. I am so glad you liked the last chapter I fought with it for so long, so i'm glad you enjoyed it. This chapter marks a turning point for our characters, so i hope you like it! enjoy

xoxo

queena

special thanks to:Crystal1998, Damon is Team Bonnie, jewelsstars, babyshan211, Ladyjaxs999, aprilf00l, randomlittleme, MystiBleu73, Likes-The-Emphatic-Boom, beautifulcurare, and StillStacie

* * *

><p>"Love, those who have faith in you sometimes go astray" Musiq Soulchild<p>

**Chapter 10: I heard Love is blind**

I awoke sometime early morning to find myself draped on Damon. My head had been buried on his chest with one leg strewn across his pale body. His arms were possessively wrapped around my waist. It seemed that even in our sleep we were a tangled mess. As I lifted my head up, I caught sight of the beautiful man that lay underneath me and not for the first time admired him. I felt my heartstrings begin to tug as I thought about him coming to my rescue, his heartfelt plea and his uncanny declaration. It was all too much. I rolled over carful not to wake him, and not for the first time admired that man before me.

The night before had been an eye opener for me. My mother was being held captive by my father in some kind of spell. That was shocker number one and of course number two had to do with Damon. I had to come to the terms that no matter what I would always love Damon; he was a part of me and that would never go away. Almost shakily I reached my hand out to fix his mused hair when I noticed the flashing lights on my phone. I screwed my face up confused because I hadn't brought my cell into the room with me, but silently thanked Stefan. It was his way of giving me an out and despite everything that was jumbled up inside of me, I knew I needed to take it.

Ever so carefully I slipped out of bed and retrieved my phone hoping that the little spell I had just whispered would keep Damon sedated while I made my next move. I looked around for something to wear as I traveled to the nearby closet where some of my clothes still lye all the while holding the phone up to my hear.

"What took you so long?" Caroline screeched through the phone.

"Caroline, I can't talk right now." I whisper. "Now is not a good time." I say into the phone.

"Oh hell no! I'm your best friend, and I'm bored. I'm stuck on this ship with my dad and I want details on your night with Mason? And don't lie to me I know you've been boning him so give me some details of how hot he was, what he said and what you did." she says in one breath.

I rolled my eyes and set the phone down on one of the tables in the ridiculous sized closet, while tugging on a pair of ripped blue jeans. "Actually we hit a snag." I say as grabbing a pair of my flip flops off the shelve. It amazed me to the fact that Damon had kept so much of my stuff here. I guess you could say that even when I was screaming at him and telling him I wanted nothing to do with him, he still kept the faith. One of the things I had always admired about Damon was the fact that he didn't give up, he was a fighter. That was probably also one of the things that I hated most about him, sometimes you needed to throw in the towel and admit defeat.

I pushed the phone off of speaker heading back into the bedroom. As Caroline speaks. "What kind of snag?"

I open my mouth to say something but im startled by the sight of Damon sitting up in bed a murderous look on his once peaceful features.

"You didn't think I'd let you leave that easy did you?" Damon asked. I felt my heart drop into my stomach and heard Caroline screeching in the background. I had never heard such bad language in my life!

"Bon, oh bon please don't tell me that's who I think it is? You went home with Damon?" Caroline asked on the other line.

I swallowed hard muttering that I would soon call Caroline back and clicked the phone off. "Damon. How long have you been up?"

He ignored her words and let out a huff. He thought they had gotten somewhere, he thought Bonnie would stop running from him yet here she was trying to run away, from what they both knew was right.

"So your just gonna try and dip out of here like nothing happen last night." He says while sitting up in bed. He had been awake for the past hour anticipating her next move and wasn't really surprised when she tried to leave without so much of a word. It had hurt though. He had revealed all to her, hoping that it would be the one thing that had brought them back together. They had shared a moment together. She had let him hold her and he thought they were getting somewhere, but like always she was running away from him.

I let out a shaky breath. I knew this was going to be difficult and that alone was the reason I wanted to avoid it, escape it. It wasn't that I was ungrateful for everything Damon had done for me. He had come to me when I needed him and that had meant the world to me. However I wasn't deluded into thinking that once his blood had passed through my system that everything between us would magically fall back into place. This went beyond Elena. It was about us. The odds were against us and we knew it.

I turned around to face him. "I know exactly what happened last night." I say closing my eyes for the briefest moments. I didn't want to hurt Damon but we both knew that we couldn't be together. Last night, had been rather extreme circumstances and that was why things had gotten so far out of control.

White hot anger rose in his chest causing him to march over to her. But when he cupped her cheek and she looked at him with those green eyes, realization nearly crushed him. "I know you're scared, I know I have a bad track record when it comes to you and Elena, but Bonnie," he says pausing as she looks into his eyes. "I promise I can make you happy." He says his voice raw with emotion. "And I can prove it, ask me anything and I'll tell you the honest truth."

I sucked in a breath. If we were being honest, I wanted the truth about _that night_.

He swallowed hard. "Before that night we shared a couple of kisses." He says pausing to see her face stoic. "It wasn't an affair that night had been our first time together. It was fast and choppy and a blur. It was something we wanted to forget and pretend never happen." He says his head down.

I say nothing to his words, knowing in my heart of hearts that-that night had been the nail in the coffin for the two of us. Not just because it ruined me and Damon, but me and Elena, and Stefan and Elena at the same time. Nothing would ever be the same and we all knew it. And maybe that was a good thing.

"Listen. I know I messed up, but I'm being honest...it's what you wanted." pause. "I can make you happy I just need you to give us another try." He says emotionally charged.

I cover his hands with my own. "I can't." I say as my heartstrings are being pulled like those of a marionette doll. "I'll always love you Damon...always." I say the last word coming out in the softest whispers although I know he's heard it. I look into stone cold eyes that are hard from my words and probably from the world in general.

He puts distance between the two of them needing to desperately get away from her because he didn't know what he'd do or say. "Because of Mason? Because you put all your fucking hopes and dreams into him?" he nearly screams and is not surprised when she doesn't jump at the thunder in his voice. He picks up a nearby glass, throwing it against the wall in a fit of anger. She had said she wanted him to save her, just once and he did it and it still didn't fucking matter.

I swallow hard as I chance a look in the direction of the door. If Damon wanted to talk, he needed to calm down because Stefan would jump at the chance to pummel his brother. " If you want to continue talking to me, you need to calm down." I say my tone laced with a warning. I didn't want to fight with him, I had been really tired of fighting with him, now I just wanted peace.

He chuckled sarcastically. Sometimes he just wanted to shake some sense into her, didn't she get it, he was in love with her and she was turning him down just like everyone else all for some rebound who was probably going to drop her once she confessed all that had happen last night. And of a part of him wanted that, he wanted her to feel like him so that she would know what it felt like to have your mistakes thrown in your face.

"He's a rebound Bonnie, and we all know what happens to rebounds." He says pausing. "They end up falling into black holes."

I perched my lips together momentarily. "We were a rebound." I say causing him to blink rapidly my way. "You remember that first night." I say pausing as we both let our minds travel that far back in time. "You confessed your undying love for Elena and she turned you down, and I-I was looking for something or someone to take the pain away..and that night it happen to be you."

He shook his head furiously. Sometimes he just wanted to shake her. He knew she was scared and she had every reason to be cautious but things changed. "You and I were more then a rebound and we both know it." He says holding her gaze. They were passion, fire, ice and complexity mixed up into one hot package. Together they had been unstoppable, nothing and no one could stop them..well except for Elena.

"Why?" I asked perplexed by his words. "Because you've convinced yourself that what we had was so special?" I asked as he blanched at my words.

He glared her way. "Because you'll never love him the way you love me." He says reaching out to touch her. "And he'll never love you the way I love you." She and Mason would never work and he knew it, and one day so would see it too.

I placed my hand on my hip. The way I loved Damon was so intense so, raw that it had nearly consumed me..it had consumed me. It was unhealthy and unstable. "Then I guess _he _wont hurt me like you did then?" I snapped back quickly regretting my words as they came out harshly. I didn't want to do this, but if we didn't do this we'd continue in circles. It was my fault. I had been so hurt that I kept running away from him but what we both needed was closure.

I watched as hurt slashed across his face and tentatively walked over to him."Whenever you hear people talking about love, you always hear how the person they love brings out the best in them. " I say pausing as emotion slams into me. This was hard- probably harder then I would have ever imagined because the blood that we shared had wrapped us in a cocoon together and hurting him felt like I was ripping myself apart as well. "We don't do that." I say placing my hand on his arm. "We fight, we tear each other down, breakup, makeup and continue as if nothing has happened."

He raises his hand out to tuck a wild curl behind her ear while leaning into her. "You act like it was all bad." He says his voice sounding fractured.

I looked up into crystal eyes and smiled and sad smile. "It wasn't all bad." I say turning away from him. "I remember the day I realized I was in love with you." I say pacing. "It was a pathetically hot day and you were working on your precious car. I had been watching you from inside the house." I say pausing to look over at him. "You looked hot or maybe I was just hot-" I say rambling. "Anyway I decided to bring you something to drink and since you don't drink anything other than bourbon and blood, I brought you bourbon with ice cubes." I say as my mind floats back to that day in particular. I could remember feeling so nervous even to meet eyes with him. "You gave me one of the most beautiful smiles I had ever seen." I say turning around to look at him. "I realized then that 1) Even your coveralls were black. 2) The despite the fact that you were under a car you managed to keep yourself clean and 3) I loved you."

He searches her face so intently and brings his arms out to grab a hold of her. She loved him, he loved her that was all that mattered. "If you love me and you know I love you then why are you doing this Bonnie?" he asked determine to understand her logic. Last night she had been in his arms and he felt it, felt the connection they had, felt her love for him. "You could have died last night." He said passionately as his eyes darted all over her face. She may have been still hurt by him and what he had done but the moment she was in trouble it was like he didn't care about anything but making things right. "And with your last thoughts you thought of me." He reminds her as she puts distance between the two of them.

"Bonnie, if that doesn't prove that maybe we're meant to give this thing between us another chance then I don't know what is?" he says almost pleadingly. He hated begging. He had begged Katherine to love him and she hadn't been able to do so, she had loved Stefan. He had begged Elena to admit that she had loved him and the ruling was still out on that one. Bonnie had loved him, openly, freely without pressure and now he was begging her to believe in the two of them.

I can't take the way he's looking at me, so open so hopeful. "Because," I burst while throwing my hands up in the air. "I loved you so much that it consumed me and I can't go back to that Damon." I say as the dam inside of me breaks as I begin to cry. He's in my face trying his best to comfort me but we both need this. "I can't" I say brokenly. "You and me together, you, me and Elena it was killing me." I say the last of the fight being sucked out of me. I was tired so tired all I wanted to do was stop hurting other people, Damon and Mason and stop hurting myself.

He wiped her face with his hands. He had never seen her break down like this. Everytime they argued or tried to deal with any aspect of their past relationship she had broken down more and more and now, she was just broken. Someone had once said you have to hit rock bottom before climbing back to the top and he figured that this was their rock bottom.

"I already told you. I don't want Elena. You're the one I want; didn't I prove that last night?" he bellows his voice coming out loud and a bit unsteady as he was just as unsteady. He was tired of talking, words had always got in the way with them but actions had always proved more."I love you. I love you so fucking much." He says gripping her hip. He's pulled her closer to him with one hand while his other hand rest between them. His fingers are playing with _her_ as he laves her exposed neck with open mouth kisses. She just needed to be reminded of _everything_, of those feelings she was trying to push aside and once he was inside she'd remember it all. She'd feel it all.

I closed my eyes briefly as I feel the familiar flames begin to lap at my skin, before halting what I knew he had planned. I pulled is face up to mine while green met ice blue. I cupped his face. "I know you love." I say tears falling freely.

He knew what she was going to say and didn't want to hear it. "Bon."

"But you love her too." I say knowingly. It was time we all dealt with the truth and moved on. Because none of us would be happy until this was truly sorted out, not Stefan who although he never spoke about it, was still hurt. Not Elena who was still torn between two brothers and not me, because regardless of what I said, I had kept Mason at arms length because of Damon, and I would never be able to move on, unless we finally let everything go. "I want more" I say weakly. " I need more...I deserve more." I say at this time my words are strong.

Her words were like vervain being poured over his skin. His head sunk low into her chest and he felt her lips placing a tiny kiss on his forehead. They were both breathing heavy, her more then him and when a crystal tear fell from his eyes he knew that it was over. He hadn't cried in over century not when Katherine told him she didn't love him, not when Elena did anything. Leave it to Bonnie to be the one to make him cry. He sniffs feeling foolish as he looks up into her teary green eyes.

"Bonnie, please." Emotion takes over him and he kisses her forehead, her cheeks, her chin.

I shut my eyes at the mere sight of him. I had never seen Damon so raw, so real and it was killing me as much as it was killing him. We needed this. We needed to say goodbye for real this time. I had always said that Damon was holding onto me but somewhere deep inside I was holding onto him just as much. "I'm not mad." I say nearly choking on my words, when he sends me a look, I chuckle despite myself though its hollow. "At least not as much as before." I say sniffling. " I knew what I was getting into- I always knew." I say pausing to let out a tiny sob. He soon wraps his arms around me and it feels so good and so bad at the same time.

After a long moment of silence I finally regain some sort of control over my emotions. The lights are flicking on and off as the windows are starting to open and shut. "And now I just want to be happy," I say pulling away from him so I could look into those glacier eyes. "And I want you to be happy to." I say tearfully. Despite everything I still believed Damon deserved to be happy, because it was all he ever wanted.

He hated feeling like this, feeling so exposed and raw yet here he was, swatting at crystal tears as they fell from his eyes. "You think you can be happy with Mason?" he asked his tone foreign to his own ears. Gone was the bravado the suave man that could charm the clothes of off any woman. He was now reverting back to his human form with his human emotions, which made him a pathetic mess.

"Yeah." I say wiping my face as my tears have finally seized. I was sure I looked a mess and soon tried to put as much distance from him as possible but he had other plans and brought me right back to his chest, where we held on for dear life. My head was tucked underneath his chin and he hugged me to his body. " This could be the worst thing I ever do. It could be the best. You and I could be meant to be together, maybe not. We owe it to ourselves to be happy to find happiness." I say as my voice gets stronger. "All I know is that you and I will never work if you don't see what is between you and Elena." I say my voice sounding monotone. I knew it would hurt like hell to see them but we both deserved to be happy and obviously together we weren't that happy.

He nods his head while walking over to the bar. He understands her logic, she can't give her heart out to him again until he can give her his full heart and if by chance he can never give her what she needed, she wanted to be happy and Mason made her happy. "You gonna tell him about last night." He says his eyes going over to the bed they had shared last night. He had been a gentleman last night, and relished in the moments she was in his arms.

I followed his line of vision and looked to bed as well. We hadn't been intimate, temptation had called out to us and if I hadn't stopped when I did we probably would have gone further then touches and kisses but we had slept in the same bed together and that was a line crossed. Mason deserved to know what happened. " Yeah, I can't lie to him." I say tearing my eyes from the bed as I look up at him.

"What are you going to do if he doesn't want you anymore?" he asked as their eyes held each others gaze.

I ran my hands through my curly hair. I had asked myself that same question. What if I had ruined something that had the potential to be really good for me? "I dunno, I guess I should go find out." I say pointing to the door. I walk over and soon open it when his voice causes me to stop.

"Bonnie." He says and when she turns around to face him he races over to her. He needed one last taste before they finally said goodbye. He looked her way, blue eyes imploring and he knew she needed this too. It was time to close this chapter of their lives, and say goodbye. With his hands braced on either side of her face, he dips his mouth down low to her, ever so slowly before capturing her lips. And so he kissed her, with everything he had inside of him. He kissed her like a man going to war, like a man saying I love you and most of all, like a man saying goodbye.

I pulled back barley able to catch my breath and that was when what little control I had slipped away. I started to cry again. This hurt, but getting back together in the near future would hurt more. I cried into his chest, I cried till the tears soaked his chest. And when I finished, I looked up into those eyes that would haunt me forever and said goodbye. "Goodbye Damon." I walked out of his room down the hall when suddenly he appeared in front of me.

"Bon, do you-do you think we could ever be friends?" he asked gripping her elbow. He knew he was prolonging the inevitable but he just wanted to know, if maybe he could have a little bit of her in his life. He had never been friends with any woman but he was hoping that he could try with Bonnie, as long as she was still in life in some sort of way. They had never been friends before. At first they hated each other, then they lusted after each other and then they were together. "I know we'll never be like you and Stefan but do you think one day, we could just be?"

I smiled sadly his way. I didn't know if I could do it but I guess it would be better then avoiding each other. "Maybe one day."

"I'll be looking forward to it." He says watching as she travels down the hall. He knows she's run to Stefan and tries to block out the voices. Turning around he caught sight of Katherine in one of his brothers shirt while she stood in the doorway. "I'm not in the mood." He says bouncing onto his bed.

"I know. We heard you." She says leaning in the doorway. "For what it's worth I'm sorry."

He chuckles sarcastically. "Don't patronize me."

He clicks her tongue. "I'm not here to here to preach to you or to offer a shoulder to cry on because we both know that is not me." She says pausing to push her curly hair out of her face. "I just came to tell you that sometimes they come back." She says before leaving him alone.

**BB**-**BB-BB**

I found Mason in the Lockwood gym boxing or sparing with one of his friends I had met at the party. In the corner I watched as the two men continued to spare. Mason was quick on his feet and with every jab I could feel his anger and frustration as if it was rolling through the air. The full moon was near so I knew he was doing all he could to keep the beast at bay. I watched silently as the two men continued to spar when they finally took a break and noticed me.

"Don't stop on my account." I say with a tiny smile on my lips. "I can wait till you guys are finished." I say sitting down on the bench. The Lockwood gym was huge and was fully equipped with everything you could need, from a swimming pool, boxing ring, and everything else that you would normally see in a gym. When I had been dating Tyler this was the place he had gone to when he felt like the world was caving in on him, he'd work out and train for everything and I would be his cheerleader sitting in the stands telling him he could do any and everything.

The moment he saw her, he knew it was time to kick Jase to the curb. He loved his friend dearly and he was glad that Jase had been the one person to help keep his mind off of Bonnie, but really he just wanted to be alone with her. Silently he took of his gloves all the while looking over at the girl who had been on his mind all night. He hadn't been able to sleep and wink and when he did actually try to sleep his mind kept reminding him of the history that was shared between Bonnie and Damon and the fact that he had fed her his blood. It was a known fact that once a supernatural being had a sip of supernatural blood it had similar effects as one being intoxicated or high. And he was sure that Damon had used that fact against Bonnie.

"Bonnie.' He says a grin playing on his features. He would be lying if he said he wasn't happy to see her. He had spent his whole night worried about her, worried about what the blood in her system would mean to the two of them. He personally knew the effects of sharing blood. Blood of another supernatural always affected your judgement. He had once been in love and let Katherine drink from him, while he had been in love with her and she had let him take a sip of her one time as well. Though they had never shared blood at the same time, he could remember the feeling that had surrounded him the moment he tasted the blood of the dangerous vampire. He felt like had been under her spell, and he had been for a very long time after that.

He cleared his throat. "You remember Jase." He says looking over to his friend who had a small smirk playing on his lips. Jase had been a good friend and had listened to him rant and rave about the vampire. He had even offered to go with him to the Salvatore manor to get Bonnie. He had declined though, he and Bonnie weren't serious, though they had spent a great deal of time together, he didn't want to come off like a jealous boyfriend.

"Hi Jase." I say waving over at him. I felt my skin heat up by the way Mason was looking at me and felt like a deer caught in headlights. I wondered if he could tell that something had happened? I ran my hands through my curly hair trying to calm my nerves.

"Hey Bonnie." He says smiling kindly over at the girl who had his friend in knots all night. He looked between the two and suddenly felt like the third wheel. He had never seen Mason so intense and Bonnie she seemed to giving it right back, when she wasn't shying away.

The blond clapped his hands decided it was time to vacate the gym. "Well I'm gonna head home since I didn't get any sleep last night. " He says eyeing his friend. "Thanks to someone who was beyond paranoid." He says again only to be ignored. He shook his head and soon vacated the gym leaving Mason and Bonnie the alone time they both wanted so badly.

"I thought I wouldn't see you till tonight, since you guys have that rule about sharing blood." He said while putting away the boxing equipment away. When finished he turns her way and noticed how young she looked today. Her hair was down in its natural curly state and she wore and headband as well. She looked all of her eighteen years and that alone made him get his emotions in check. Bonnie was young and he didn't want to come off demanding or anything like her ex boyfriend because he wasn't. He liked her, and sometimes he forgot that this beautiful girl in front of him, this beautiful witch in front of him was still a teenager at heart.

I shrugged my shoulders and picked off a piece of lint off of my leggings before meeting his honest and open blue green eyes. "That had been the plan but...things change." I say surprised when Mason is suddenly in front of me, his big hand underneath my chin.

"You've been crying." He says noticing her red rimmed eyes. He swears that if that damn vampire has done anything to hurt her, it'll be his last move he'll ever make and instead of being undead- he'll be really dead. "What happen?" he asked his voice soft.

I smile almost sadly his way. Mason was good for me, he was good to me and if he could understand what happen last night then we could be good together. I had come to the startling conclusion while on my way over to the Lockwood mansion that nothing in my life had been simple. I had barley turned eighteen and already I was in situations that were probably way beyond me. I had a vampire who I could openly admit I was addicted to, I loved Damon and I always would but I wanted more, then the uncertainness that came with loving him...being with him. And then their was Mason, a werewolf quite could be everything I had ever wanted in someone, that is if he could understand everything with Damon.

"We need to talk." I say looking up into his blue green eyes. I can tell by the look on his face he's expecting the worst, and for the life of me, I wish I didn't have to do this. But it had to be done, I needed to own up to mistakes and let the chips fall where they fell.

**BB-ML-**

We had traveled along the property in strained silence before finally coming to a stop by the lake.

Reaching out for his hand I let out a shaky breath before smiling. "First I want to start of saying, I like you...I like you a lot."I say simply. "The last couple of weeks we've been hanging out and I haven't had this much fun a very long time." I say pausing and I can tell by the look on his face that he is waiting for the other shoe to drop.

"Why do I get the feeling that there is more to this conversation then you liking me?" he questioned casting a sideways look in her direction. He had known the moment that she had left with the Salvatore brothers that the idea was a bad one. He didn't give a shit what either vampire wanted, he knew that Bonnie being in that house especially after everything that had occurred with her mother was a bad idea. She was emotional and vulnerable and that combination along with her ex had been a recipe for disaster.

I turned around to face him. "Something happen last night, something you aren't going to like." I say pausing to bite on my thumbnail. I had normally been so self assured and assertive but today I felt like a little girl who was entirely too emotional. Crying had never solved any of my problems in the past yet I felt like that was all I wanted to do.

He let out a sound that was between a snort and a harsh breath. He could only imagine what had happen. And his gut was telling him it had something to do with Salvatore and not the one that he could at least tolerate. He saw it in her eyes yesterday. Damon had come to her rescue and it was like she was seeing fucking hearts, stars and rainbows in the sky. And then their was Damon he had been so smug, he had boost about giving Bonnie his blood almost taunting him with the knowledge that she had a piece of that smug s.o.b. running through her bloodstream.

"Did you sleep with him?" he asked not being able to hide his anger or disappointment.

"No! I couldn't do that to you or myself...hell I couldn't do that to Damon either." I say chancing a look in his direction to see that his burly body was rigid. "He kissed me and I.. I kissed him back." I say as the image replays in my mind. "We were emotional from all the fighting and everything in between." I say closing my eyes briefly. "And we got caught up in the moment and in our past." I admit and it was the truth. "But I stopped it before we could have gone down the road of no return." I say as Mason crosses his arms in front of his chest.

Silence

He clicked his tongue and successfully walked around her. He had feelings too and just like her he had been hurt by someone he had really loved, he understood her, but cheating was something he was against. And if she couldn't let go of Damon then he didn't see a reason why the two of them should hang out. He cared about her, more then he should, so early but that didn't mean he was willing to play second fiddle not to Damon Salvatore.

"The moment you left I knew that something like this would happen." He said turning sharply to look at her. He would never forget the look in her eyes it was almost like Damon had given her reason to believe he loved her.

"Why because im so weak?" I asked my voice strong as I stood inches from him. Once upon a time I had been weak for Damon. I would have done anything for him, and it didn't matter how much it hurt me as long as the end result would make him happy. I was admittedly addicted to him, and it went way beyond the sex...I was just addicted to him. But the silver lining of it all came this morning and last night. I didn't give into temptation last night and it had been screaming for me to fall back into old habits and most importantly, I willingly walked away from Damon this morning and that had shown growth on my part.

"No." He says fiercely. He didn't think Bonnie was weak, he thought she was a young girl who had fallen in love with a century and half old vampire. She had been with Damon for a long time and for a girl who was still in her teens that said a lot. "You said it yourself, you loved him so much that it consumed you."

I let out a shaky breath and walked into his direction so that I stood in front of him. I reached out and took his big hand into my own. "That was before I realized that being with someone didn't have to hurt all the time." I say licking my dry lips as blue green eyes stare down at me. "I'm not gonna lie. I love him." I say causing blue green eyes to swirl with anger and hint of disappointment. "But that doesn't mean that he and I could be together again."

He dropped her hand and walked away as he tried to calm down. He hated the thought of Damon using her feelings against her and hated even more that he cared so much, but he did care more then he had wanted to admit. Bonnie had deserved more than Damon Salvatore, she deserved more then being used a crutch because he was hung up on one of his friends. He had a feeling that if Bonnie was willing to really give the two of them a chance, they could be something really good. However he had no intention on being the fallback guy, if Bonnie wanted to be with Damon, he couldn't stop her.

Soon she was in his face her eyes pleading and when she reached out for his hand, he felt a spark run through his body. "What do you want Bonnie?" he asked his voice coming out scratchy and raw. Damon had done to Bonnie what Katherine had done to him and that was mind fuck him. He wanted to save Bonnie, but he couldn't do that if she didn't want him.

I smile. I had always been the type of girl who owned up to everything I did, said and felt. The only time I had been utterly confused had been

"I-I want you Mason." I say feeling exposed. I had enjoyed my time with Mason I liked that their wasn't any pressure with him and nothing had ever been heavy except well, this whole thing but aside from that-I had fun with Mason and I wanted to continue to have fun. When he says nothing, his silence says enough. I pull away from him giving the two of us some much needed space. "What happen between me and Damon was wrong...what I let happen was wrong. I'm not the girl who cheats on people or lie." I say pausing mid pace. "I'm sorry." I say finally before turning on my heel. It was understandable to me if Mason couldn't accept my apology. I had trouble forgiving myself and I knew how difficult it was to forgive and forget.

I wait another moment before starting my walk back to the main house. I needed to grab my keys and then I'd get the hell out of dodge. I get about ten feet away with suddenly a hand has reached out for me halting me my movements.

"You're forgiven." He says as his thumb traces shapes on her wrist. "I want you to." He says not being able to resist those green eyes and that smile. She could have done worst, he had been they're and done that so he couldn't throw stones. Their was something about her that he couldn't walk away from and he prayed he never would have to do so.

When she turns his way and smiles, all he can to is bring her closer to his body, as he whispers into her ear. They may not be serious right now, but if one day she wants out, he just wants her to be honest with him, and before you know it, they are sealing the new arrangement with a kiss.

**DS-DS**

**Damon**

The sound of the doorbell made him groan as he made the trip from second story music room. He had been listening to sad songs like a heartbroken teenager. Currently he was listening to the moody sound of Amy Winehouse as she bellowed "loves a losing game." As the doorbell continued to ring, he made his way to the corridor of the living room at a snails pace.

After a long talk with himself...to himself he had realized that everything that had cumulated between he and Bonnie, every word that hadn't passed his lips, everything he had failed to do, say, or show had been the result of the other woman in their relationship. He loved Bonnie, he really did but he knew that his love for Elena although it had been back burned the last couple of weeks, would continue to be in the way of the two of them. He had been in love with two women, he chuckled darkly to himself. No he had been in love with two girls, that had hardly had a chance to live, they were still very young and he had come in wanting anything and everything from both of them.

Drink in hand he finally made his way over to the door revealing non other then Mason Lockwood. He had been expecting him, If the shoe was on the other foot he too would have done the same thing. If anyone had dared to go as far as he had gone with Bonnie while the two of them were even sex buddies he would have made sure the guy would never see the light of day again, because even when he and bonnie were _just_ "_sexing each other_" they were much more.

"Mason." he said his stance reminiscent of Jack Sparrow, drink in hand knees slightly bent. The wolf says nothing and soon walk past him. A smirk plays on his lips as he closes the door behind him and finishes off the rest of his blood before turning to the wolf. "I guess it's safe to say Bonnie talked to you." he says, his tongue all but spelling her name out. He could still taste her on his tongue, that last kiss nearly scorched him. And then their was the fact that he sampled some of her sweet blood, it had his body humming in pleasure while his mind was thinking of all the ways he had screwed up.

"Yeah" Mason said his fist clenched. When he thought about what had happen last night it made him sick to his stomach. He knew Damon was going to try and take advantage and as predicted her did just that. He didn't blame Bonnie, no he blamed her leech of an ex boyfriend. And he had come here to settle the score, they both knew it was bound to happen, he wouldn't let Damon continue and interfere with what he had going with Bonnie anymore. It stopped today.

" Last night was the last time you will ever touche her.. You mess with her head...confuse her. But not anymore. She's with me and I wont let you ever hurt her again." he gritted out fists clenched as he eyes the vampire. He knew that the vampire had used all his tricks to play on the girl that had been so heartbroken over him and he had come here to stake his claim and beat the hell out of the vampire as well.

Blue eyes rolled as he looked over at the wolf. He mimicked the stance the wolf was doing. It was time they finally fought. It was no secret he had hated the wolf. Call it vampire rule of thumb or maybe it was jealousy. He hated the man before him, and not just because he was a wolf, but because he might actually make Bonnie happier then he ever could.

"It must be hard for you, knowing that no matter what you do, how you stake your claim she'll always love me." He asked a bubble of laughter brewing. It was freaking hilarious to watch the wolf puff his chest out and pace back and forth, but in the end it would mean absolutely nothing. He and Bonnie were connected, and nothing could ever really sever that tie, not Mason and not Elena.

"She wont love you forever." the wolf says with a grin. "But you on the other hand, you'll be pining away for her for a very long time.' Mason says grinning. "The joys of being a vampire." he say sarcastically. "You'll spend the rest of your dead life regretting losing the girl with the green eyes, while I have a chance to be her everything." blue green eyes dance.

He chuckled, it was obvious Mason wanted to go, he wanted to fight, then they'd fight. He was trying not to break his ass because Bonnie would be pissed but he figured this was bound to happen. "You wanna go?" he asked revved up, like a car about to drag race. The wolf was just as ready, and when the charged for him he knew it was go time.

He threw the first punch connecting with the mouth with the wolf. In turn Mason had started hitting his body. They had attacked one another causing furniture to break as they rolled on the floor. This was a fight that had needed to be done. He had the wolf in a headlock pulling tight on his neck and when the wolf was gasping for hair he whipped out a peace of wolf bane shoving it down his enemies throat. Just as he shoved the plant down he felt a sting and realized he had been pricked with a needle and that he knew was full of vervain.

Both in a drugged out state. The two still fought but not as hard. For the most part they were still doing better then the average humans. Mason had charged for him and punched him in the eye while he had worked on bruising the ribs of the overgrown dog.

"You stay the hell away from her." Mason growled after being thrown across the room and landing on a table. He lye on his back in pain, feeling as if he had been run over my a train.

Sluggishly he made his way over to Mason who was now lying on pile of wood. He could see the wolf was tired and so was he. "I could kill you right now and not even think twice." he said looking down at the man before him.

"Go ahead, Bonnie would see what kind of man you really are"' Mason says grunting in pain.

He kicked the wolf for the hell of it. "I wont though. But not for you but for her."he said meandering sluggishly over to the bar. He wanted to do so much more to Mason, he wanted to leave him crippled, beat him within an inch of his life but he wouldn't because Bonnie, would never look at him the same. She would look at him like he was a monster and after finally being her hero he didn't want to let her down.

Mason stood up and watched the vampire drink from the bottle. "Now you give a damn about her. You didn't care about her when you were trying to seduce her and don't give me the bullshit. Bonnie may believe that it was the blood that was making you act accordingly, but we both know that was all you. She was affected by the blood and you-you manipulated the situation but you still lost because I didn't end things with her." Mason says a smile on his lips.

He gritted his teeth. Was Mason daring to gloat in his fucking face? He spoke his voice deadly. "The only reason why you've won is because I let her go." he said his voice dripping with hatred. He was willing to give Bonnie what she wanted her freedom, but that didn't mean he loved her less.

Mason walked over the vampire unaffected by his tone. Everyone tipped toed around Damon Salvatore but he didn't give a flying fuck. He wasn't afraid nor did he care about his feelings. "You may think you have everyone fooled, Bonnie even but I know that her choosing me, is gonna eat away at you and the moment you get your going to try and come between us." he said chuckling. "Come after us and you'll start a war that might just end in finally ending your undead one." Mason said walking over to the door.

For his part Damon was unimpressed as well. "Don't think because you have her now that it'll last long. I'll always be in the back of her mind, inside of her heart. What you have together may be fun and easy but she will always be mine Mason." he says not surprised when the wolf storms out slamming the door behind him.

**DS-DS-DS**

He found himself on the familiar doorstep jilted and angry which wasn't a good combination but he didn't really care. Misery had always loved company and Elena was his only company at the moment.

"Damon, what the hell happen to you?" Elena asked upon seeing the bruise on his face.

He walked past her and found a seat in the living room. "I could ask you the same thing." he said noticing the cut across her cheek.

She bit her lip thinking back to what had happen last night. She had challenged Katherine to a fight and by slapping the hell out of the vampire. Katherine in turn had scratched her face and was about to do more when Stefan had surprisingly stepped in putting an end to the whole thing. She had never been more thankful to her ex boyfriend then in that moment. "Katherine, and I got into an argument. I slapped her-she scratched me and was about to do more but Stefan stopped it." she said looking over at him as she sat on the couch beside him. Her mind quickly went back to the night before. For a split second she saw the man that she had fallen for in Stefan, he had saved her from a beat down from Katherine and when they locked eyes she thought she had him, that the real Stefan had come back, but then it was gone just as he, as he had disappeared

When Elena had dared to touch just beneath his eye he moved far away from her. "I got in a fight with Mason Lockwood." he says a smirk forming on his lips, he beat the hell out of the wolf, and would gladly do it again if he ever dared to step to him again.

She rose her brows and folded her hands in her lap. She had known Damon was a hot head and Mason was the same it was just odd hearing that the two were fighting over Bonnie. In fact she had never really seen Damon fight anyone unless they were deemed the bad guy, but she had heard that Stefan had put a beating on Damon for breaking Bonnies heart. "So you guys were fighting over Bonnie?" she deduced.

"Yeah" he said with a simple shrug of his shoulders. He was almost comical that he hadn't fought for Bonnie earlier, he had always been fighting for Elena, fighting to save Elena. And then after she had walked away from him, he wanted to fight for her, he wanted to save her and even that had come too late.

It was odd hearing Damon talk about Bonnie, because despite the fact that Bonnie and Damon had been together for about two years, that subject had always been glazed over. However now that they were talking about Bonnie more, she could hear the words that Damon had always been afraid to say...he was in love with Bonnie.

"I love her. "He said suddenly as his eyes landed on a picture frame of the girls, it was one of those double sided frame and enclosed was a photo of the girls in their cheer uniforms while the other side held a picture of them on graduation day. In each picture the girls were hugging, Caroline and Elena were flocking to the sides of Bonnie hugging her tight and the sight made him smile despite himself. "And she loves me." he says placing the frame back onto the mantle.

She swallowed hard, it seemed like Damon would be getting everything he wanted back, while she sat and watched as Stefan paraded around with Katherine. It was a bit of a shock to realize for the first time in a long time, that the Salvatore brothers were moving on without her. "Did she tell you that?" she asked as nonchalantly as possible.

"Yeah." he said as his mind went back to her finally admitting that she still loved him. It should have made him feel much better but it still hurt, knowing that they could never be what they wanted...at least not right now.

"So are you two getting back together?" she asked thinking back to the night before. She had seen Bonnie and Damon just as most as Mystic Falls had seen the two of them on the dance floor. Even from afar, even knowing that they weren't on the best terms she could openly admit, that they looked perfect together.

Immediately he stood up at her words walking over to stand by the window, as he looked out. It was painfully broody and something Stefan did so often, but in this instant it had calmed him. "No" he said he back to her. "I told her the truth about that night, and everything that I thought she needed to know before that night." he said as a gasp escaped her mouth from across the room.

"I love her," he says again. "And she loves me, but she cant get passed what happen. She cant let herself trust me again or believe that I wont run back to you." he says through gritted teeth. "And most importantly she cant began to fathom ever getting back with me until you and I figure out what's between us." he says whirling around to see Elena looking pensive.

She ran her hands through her long brown hair. For her part the thought of exploring things with Damon scared her, that was why she had always run away from it. If they actually gave into the whatever was between them, she feared that their would be no coming back from it, and if she hadn't already lost Bonnie and Stefan, then she'd lose them for sure. "Damon.' she says finally meeting his eyes and it was then that his face said everything she needed to know. They weren't just doing this for their own selfish reasons but for Bonnie and Stefan as well. Until they figured out what they had everyone else was doomed as well.

"Elena.' he called and his words sounded painful even to his own ears.

She licked her dry lips. "So you're saying that the only way we can have a shot with Stefan and Bonnie is if we give into whatever it is between us?" she asked slowly as Damon had come to sit next to her on the sofa.

"That's exactly what I'm saying." he said as the two of them sat side by side. He felt her eyes on him and looked her way.

Silently they sat together, it was time for them to grow up.

**A.N.2:** Long chapter i know, but i promise the next chapter wont be as long. The ending was so hard to write because i'm not into delena but i bamon were ever to get back together they would both have to figure out their feelings for Elena and Mason.

**spoilers**: Bonnie will began to look into the mystery of the diary and her parents, an impromptu reunion sheds some light on a few things. **More to come**: a roadtrip


	12. Chapter 11

A.N. Happy Friday everybody! thanks again for reading and replying! I so blown away by the response for the last chapter. I struggled with that chapter for a long time, so im glad you all seemed interested in it. ok on with the next chapter

special thanks to: brazilianfan1, babyshan211, aprilf00l, klarybelle, jewelsstars, guest, Liz, and randomlittleme

xoxo

queena

"_I'm strong, but I break, I'm stubborn and I make plenty of mistakes_."

**Chapter 11: Sober**

_Three months and I'm still breathing_

Rolling over in bed, I stared up at the ceiling for only a few moments before looking at the man next to me. It had been three months since Mason and I had decided to really give our romance a real chance and I couldn't have been happier. It was almost like the dark cloud that had been hanging above my head for so long had finally gone away and I owed that in part to Mason. He had been everything I needed and everything I wanted.

I had spent the last three months not only figuring out who I was and what I wanted, but trying to uncover the truth behind my mother and fathers relationship. I had only recently been able to find the dairies my mother had left for me and from the moment I had read the first page of the first diary I was hooked. Not only did I get a chance to feel closer to my mother but I had also gotten inside of her head and her heart. My mother had chronicled everything that she felt was important. The first dairy I had read was about her true love Elijah who had been a vampire, she had loved him and it broke her heart when she had to give him up but she understood that-that was expected to her, especially since her father was a prominent figure of the witching council. Although I had loved hearing and reading about her world wind love with Elijah the thing that had me most interested was the relationship with my father. Which was far more complex then I would have expected.

Gazing up at Mason I lean over and press a kiss to his cheek before carefully removing myself from his bear like grip on me. Slipping out of bed I look his way one more time, letting my eyes roam over his tanned chest, to look up and his peaceful face, before tip toeing to the adjoining office next to his room. The office was supposed to be used for his business affairs but I had recently taken over it, with all of notes and theories about my mother and father, not to mention it was one of the places I had hid everything my mother had left for me, aside from the Salvatore manor. I was afraid that if my father had returned home and saw everything that I would never know the real truth.

Once alone I sit down in the big chair and prop my feet up on the desk before delving into the beginning of my parents marriage.

_To my daughter Bonnie may this diary guide you and help you and most importantly may it save you._

_Love mom_

_Dear Diary_

_The day you get married is supposed to be the happiest day of your life, yet on the day I married Daniel Bennett I knew that my life was going to change and not for the better. For starters I had married him as a request from my dying father. He had been friends with Daniels parents and I knew in the back of my mind that he had always hoped that one day our families would become one, so I offered to give him the one thing he wanted most in the world. I united the two families which were the head of the witching council. It was only after my father had passed did I realize I realize that maybe I had jumped into action too fast. I had always known that Dan had loved me, the kind of love he had for me was something that I had always run from. His love was all too consuming and at times oppressive. He loved me, and when he said he loved me he felt it but I didn't love him not that way he needed to be loved, I didn't worship the ground he walked on and that hadn't bode well for him. _

_Dan needed someone who was as consumed with love as he had been with me. And I couldn't love him that way. And that had caused his facade to crack and show me the real him._

_Months into our marriage I realized my grave mistake, and I realized the man I had married the same man that had been my best friend for so many years had been a stranger to me. Dan in his own way loved me, he loved to show me off to people as if I were a prop. He had played the role of the perfect husband who loved and adored his family. He had even been in the running to be head of the witching council since a vacant seat was now available since my fathers passing. To the outside he was the perfect man, the perfect husband who was handsome and wanted nothing but the best for me. But behind closed doors he was man that was driven by power. He wanted to control the council, he wanted to be known in the witching world as one of the most prominent families and most of all he wanted to control me._

_I had told myself I would never let him control me, and he had even loosen up on his fixation and often times obsession with me, and our picture perfect marriage. For a while I thought maybe I had been too hard on him and I had strived to make my marriage work, the only problem was neither of us were really happy. That was until I got pregnant with you. It seemed like our lives had taken a turn for the better and I hoped it would stay that way. Dan had always wanted power and everything that came along with it, but a child was so much greater then the joys of power. _

_It wasn't until I had given birth did I realize what Dan had really wanted and what I had given him...he wanted power and I had just given it to him._

I licked my lips anticipating the next page when the sound of a loud yawn caused me to look up to catch Mason as he strolled in shirtless with low slung pajama bottoms on.

"Bon its three in the morning," he says coming to rest behind her in the chair. "What are you doing up?"

I peer up at him. "I couldn't sleep." I say almost sheepishly. "And I didn't want to wake you because you looked so cute." I admitted causing him to chuckle.

He turned the chair around so that she was facing him, and bit his lip at the innocent look on her face. He never got tired of that look on her face, of having her in his arms, in his home...in his bed. "And here I thought I tired you out." He says bracing his arms on the armrest while he traps her in the chair.

A smile tugs at my lips. "You did." I say stroking his cheeks. "But my mind couldn't rest and since I was up I decided that maybe I could start reading the second diary my mother had left for me." I say holding up the material. "It's the beginning of her and my father." I say my voice softening. I wanted to know why this had happen and if their was any truth to what my mother had said about my father. She had left me quite the amount of reading material the two things that were missing was her family crystal which helped aide her powers and her grimiore, but I figured if I kept reading that maybe I would find where she had stored everything.

He couldn't help but feel for her. Bonnie wanted to save her mother but he knew that the thought of her father being anything other then the man she had remembered as a child would break her heart. That was why it had taken so long for her to even crack open diaries that began her parents life together. He knew she wanted to hold onto the memories of her once happy family. "Bon, you don't have to do this now."

I let out a sigh. "I have to do this sooner or later."

"How about you do it later then." He says peering into her eyes. "Don't think I haven't notice the nightmares. I think its time for you to take a break."

I'm silent for a moment or two. Since learning about some of things that had happen in my parents life, most importantly since I had started having dreams as if I were in one of my mothers memories it had been harder to sleep because I didn't want to see what she had seen. "Ok." I say simply leaning up to kiss his lips.

He wrapped his arms around her soon gathered her in his arms. Her legs wrapped around his waist as he carried her back to bed. But not before making her promise him that she would give solving the mystery of her parents a rest for twenty fours hours, and when she had agreed he made sure that she'd sleep like a baby by making her scream his name over and over again till her voice was hoarse and her body was worn out.

* * *

><p><strong>Elena<strong>

_Three months and I'm still standing here_

Elena Gilbert had found herself sitting on a familiar bluff that overlooked Mystic Falls. She had wanted to escape everything, escape the pained look Damon had given her everytime he look her way, because in some weird way he blamed her for losing Bonnie. Wasn't he the one that had said that sooner or later they would end up together? Yet now he was looking at her like she had blown apart his life. Had he forgotten she lost Stefan? Her life had been ruined and that was why she wanted an escape.

She wanted to escape the questioning looks Jeremy had given her, because Damon was always around yet Bonnie hadn't been seen in a very long time. And more importantly she just wanted time to think. Her mind had been a jumbled mess of emotions and she just wanted time to remember simpler times. Stefan had brought her here when her life was falling apart, and being here made her feel closer to him. She could remember hiking up the tattered path, remember the way Stefan smiled at her and reassured her that she could do anything. And most importantly she remembered feeling so loved.

The sound of rustling caught her attention and when she turned around she caught sight of Stefan. Even after everything that had happen between them, fate had come into play Stefan had shown up on the same day as she. "Stefan." She says standing before him. She watches as he takes the ear buds out of his ears and glares his way.

_Three months and I'm getting better_

"What are you doing here?" he asked darkly. He had gone out of his way to avoid everything that was Elena, which wasn't too difficult because he had found himself wrapped up in everything that was Katherine. He was aware that some may think he was taking the Damon route in submerging himself into someone that was the opposite of the other yet looked the same, but that wasn't the case. He had forgotten what if felt like to be free and reckless and Katherine had made him feel like the weight of the world was no longer on his shoulders and he enjoyed that. She was different from the woman he had remembered...maybe even the woman he built up in his head out of anger and resentment.

She wraps her arms around herself. "I wanted to feel closer to you." She says as Stefan glowers her way. "So I came here, and as fate had it you came here too." She says a hopeful smile on her face.

He snorted, fate had nothing to do with this, it was her stalking technique. She had learned from the best. His brother had been the perfect stalker. And by the looks of it, he had helped Elena find her inner crazy, since she was obviously doing the same thing. He frowned momentarily and wondered if Damon might try and make a move, but then decided against it, their earlier conversation had told him everything. Damon had been trying to make amends and he had shut him down telling his older brother that he could easily bite the dust and he wouldn't care. "Did Damon tell you I was coming here?" he questioned. "Let me guess, he put you up to this, thinking that if I see you here it'll change everything for me, and in turn change everything for him and Bonnie."

She rolls her brown eyes. She was so tired of hearing about Damon and Bonnie. Right now they were the last thing on her mind, she only had one person on her mind, one person had her heart and that was Stefan. "This isn't about Damon, or Bonnie!" she ranted. "This is about us." She says meeting his grey eyes that were filled with fury.

"There is no US!" he says not surprised when she lets out a gasp. Elena is dramatic that way, she likes to make lots of pained gestures and flinches when someone dares to go against her."I thought you got that at Saints and Sinners when you spotted me and Katherine on the grass with my fingers up her dress." He says as a perverse smile forms on his lips.

"You mean the night you stopped Katherine from coming after me." She corrected a slight smile marring her features. She could remember the night quite well, although Stefan had said some rather hurtful words to her, words she knew he was just saying to hurt her, the way she had hurt him, he had still come through and saved her, and that had given her hope that all was not lost between the two of them. "Katherine probably would've killed me if you weren't they're..." she says her footsteps drawing her closer to the man that she had loved. She may have taken a detour with Stefan for a while but she had never stopped loving him.

He lets out a puff of air already growing tired of this conversation. He didn't want to hear about anything Elena had to say but for some reason instead of chucking the deuces up and flashing away from her, he stood rooted in place. He had a feeling that Elena had hope that the two of them would be again but she was wrong. His eyes were open now and he'd never go back to her. And now was the time for him to finally tell her. He had bottled up much of his emotions for so long, opting to ignore the pain of her betrayal with his brother, but after witnessing his best friend being able to finally get things out in the open he knew it was time for him to do the same. Bonnie was happier, now that she had fully accepted everything and let go and he wanted that...to be truly happy and at peace with everything. "Katherine wouldn't have killed you." he says though his voice is strained.

She takes yet another step forward. "She hates me, and she wants my life hence the reason she's all over you. She hates that you moved on from her and her tainted love and that you love me." she says stopping in front of him. "Stefan." She says reaching out to touch his hand. "You saved my life again and I know you did it because you still _love_ me." She says slowly as her brown eyes meet with gray.

He scuffed and pushed away from her. "I didn't do it for you." He says while over looking the bluff. In all honesty he may not have wanted to be with Elena again, he may not even love her the way he used to love her, but he didn't want to see her hurt and even more he didn't want others to hurt because of her death.

She shook her head, while folding her arms underneath her chest. "You love me."

He turned around to face her and let out a humourous chuckle causing her once sunny face to be marred with confusion. "You would think that wouldn't you?" he asked while eyeing her. "You still think my world revolves around you but you're wrong." He says a ghost of a smile gracing his lips. "I saved you, for Jeremy who has lost way too much at such a young age, I did it because your friends don't deserve to die, I did it for Bonnie because even though she refuses to speak of you I know she still aches for your friendship even though you don't seem too bothered." He says to cause her to blanch at his words. "Most of all, I did it so that I could tell you all the reasons I saved you and not one of those reasons was for you but for the people that love you." He says with so much honesty that the force should have knocked her down.

She takes a dramatic step back as if he had slapped her with his words. "Your lying, you still _love me_, I know it...I feel inside of my heart...and I know because it's the reason you are spending so much time with Katherine even though she ruined you life before. You need me...and I know this because I need you." She said almost desperately.

He tilts his head her way as he looks on with cold eyes."You know I use to need you. I loved you so much that I was willing to wait, I was willing to do anything for you as long as it made you happy, but you ruin that." He says pausing as he marched over to her. "And you ruined it by bedding my brother." He nearly screamed. "I hate you, Elena Gilbert, I hate you because took my love and toss it away and most importantly you ruined my already fragile relationship with my brother! My brother!" he says again this time louder. "He was all I had in this world, and you broke us, you broke the Salvatore brothers..and you did something Katherine could never quite do. You ruined us." He says pausing as she dares to shed tears his way.

She couldn't help but cry. Stefan had been so harsh, so brutal with her, it was starting to take its toll on her. She didn't understand why she was getting the wrath from hell and Katherine was getting another chance? It wasn't fair. " I made a mistake!" she cried. "One of the things you used to say to me was that you'd let me make my own choices, and mistakes and that we would learn from it together." She pleads. She licked her lips as a tear dripped down, while still looking at Stefan. "I made a mistake and I'm sorry Stefan, I'm sorry." She cried.

He nearly rolled his eyes out of its sockets. Tears wouldn't save them, it wouldn't save Elena she wanted forgiveness, she wanted everything swept under the rug but he couldn't do that. He pokes his lips out momentarily before speaking. "If it were anyone else, another guy I would've forgiven you, chalked it up to everything around us...this town...this life. But you picked my _brother_, your best friends boyfriend and that I can't forgive."

She ran her hands through her long dark hair. "Why? Why can't you forgive me when Katherine did the same thing?" she questioned causing his eyes to go dark. "You forgave Katherine and she nearly ruined your relationship with Damon- so why can't you forgive me."

He chuckles again because Elena has yet to see the problem in the whole situation. She had known about his history with Damon. Once upon a time they had loved the same girl, Katherine and it nearly broke them it had broken them. The difference between the two was that what happen with Katherine was a long, long time ago and they were working on healing. Elena of course had known about all the past and yet she had still jumped into bed with his brother. "The difference is that you knew about everything." He says his voice echoing. "You knew about Katherine, you knew that I loved you, you knew that Damon cared about you and most importantly you _knew_ that Bonnie had loved Damon. And that should have been enough reason to stop."

She couldn't stand it any longer. She was tired of hearing about Bonnie!"Stop bringing Bonnie into this, we are talking about us!" she snapped

He snorted. "Why? Because you don't want to admit that you hurt your so-called best friend?"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh please, Bonnie is just fine. In case you haven't notice she has Mason Lockwood on her arm, Damon pining away for her and you fighting her battles!" she exploded. "Trust me when I say she's just fine." She says dryly. Since when did the world revolve around Bonnie and her feelings, Bonnie would be just fine, she was always fine.

A lightbulb clicks in his head as he watched his ex girlfriend, a woman... a girl who he once thought was full of so much grace, and love turn into this person that had only cared about herself. He wondered if this had always been the case or if this was the result of being with Damon? "It kills you doesn't it, to know that so many people care about Bonnie."

"You sound like Katherine." She shoots out annoyed that Katherine of all people is infecting Stefan like a virus and taking over everything.

_Flashback_

"_Do us all a favor Katherine and leave while you still have some sort of pride." Elena said while smirking at the vampire in front of her. "Stefan loves me. It's the reason he stopped you from attacking me." She says almost dreamily. Katherine may have been the person Stefan was sleeping with but it was obvious that she was the one he loved._

_Katherine looked her way mildly amused. "You would think that wouldn't you. 'She says walking around the pathetic mortal that wore her face. "But its not true. Stefan only stopped me from tearing you limb by limb because of what he heard." Katherine says slinging her curly hair to the side._

_Elena looked at her unfazed. "And what did he hear that was important that he'd leave me alone with you?"_

_Katherine smiled a big smile. "Something happen with Bonnie, we heard Mason and Damon arguing and Bonnie trying to calm the two of them." she says grinning again. She could tell by the look on her clones face that she was shocked that anyone would dare to leave her side in order to save her friend._

"_He left me to check on Bonnie?" Elena says in disbelief. "He left me with you to go check on Bonnie?" she mused again. "You could kill me and he's gone."_

"_Yep" Katherine said grinning again. "But I wont kill you, watching your face is priceless to me. It must kill you to know that he'll do anything for her._

_She blinks and Katherine is suddenly gone leaving her all alone._

"_He loves me." she says to the wind. Stefan loved her, he would always love her, he told her so and nothing not his devotion to Bonnie, nor his latest setback with Katherine would change that._

_end of Flashback_

"And you sound like Damon." He says picking up on her tone of voice.

She scuffs while kicking dirt and slings her long hair. "I love Bonnie. She is my best friend." She says as if she's on an auto repeat. She hated knowing that so many people had gotten in the way of her and Stefan. They had an epic love and everyone from Katherine and meddling to his blind devotion and loyalty had taken to Bonnie had ruined their reunion.

"You say that, but I don't believe you and really I don't think you believe it." He scrubs his hands over his face. "I'm telling you this because it's the truth, we are never getting back together Elena!" he says watching as she starts to cry all over again. "What we had is dead, just like me. Its time you face the facts so we can both move on, me with Katherine and you with Damon." He says finally finished with her. He had been holding back for a long time and now he felt free, of the chains Elena had put on him.

"I don't want Damon." She says stubbornly to thin air.

* * *

><p><strong>Damon<strong>

_Three months and I've been living here without you_

It had been nearly three months since he had let go of Bonnie and he'd be lying if he said it had been smooth sailing. For the first time he was putting someone else ahead of himself, or Elena and he had done so by letting Bonnie walk out the door. That of course did mean the task had been easy. In fact that task had been very difficult because for the first time in a long time he felt that his mind wasn't clouded with anything regarding Elena. He knew he cared for her, he wanted to protect her but the kind of love he had for her fell flat. It wasn't the kind of love to sustain any time of romantic relationship. For starters, he didn't want her, and Elena hadn't wanted him either. They loved each other yes, the depended on each other and after much thinking and lots of drinking on his part he came to realize that what had drawn him to Elena in the first place was his dependency on Katherine, he loved/obsessed/lusted for Katherine and when she had come back, the first time he thought they'd be together. She however didn't want him and because of that, he channeled all of his feelings that had been bottled up and brewing at the surface to Elena because with Elena, he knew, just knew things would be different.

And it had been different, Elena had treated him much different then Katherine, but then came the night he had confessed to loving her and Elena had claimed not to return his feelings and that was the night he had found Bonnie. It's funny how you realize what you have once it's gone. Because as more time passes and the more he misses Bonnie, the more he's aware of everything about Elena. He hadn't been _in love _with her, and probably never had loved her the way he had claimed. He did however care for Elena, and always would but Bonnie was who he was in love with, who he wanted, the only problem was that she didn't want him...at least not now. They had lost trust, well she had lost trust in him and he could understand that Bonnie was the type of girl who had given so easily and trusted so easily and for him to so much as touch another girl-let alone her best friend had been a deal breaker. It had destroyed the two of them and had not only his relationship with Bonnie, but it shattered his already fragile relationship with his brother and that alone was something he never thought would happen.

Stefan, he never thought he'd miss him so much when he was only a few feet away. He and Stefan never talk. They pass each other like ships in the night. Sometimes he watches his brother but pretends not to do so. Stefan who is still on human blood, now blood bags thanks to the influence of a certain witch seems dare he say, happy. He and Katherine seem to be doing good. Sometimes he listens to the two of them talk, it's different with them then it had been with Elena. Stefan seems more at ease and Katherine though is still a raging bitch she has shown her heart...and he thought that the moment she had told him she never wanted him that nothing was inside of her, but he had been wrong. Stefan had always been inside of her...he had always been her heart. And that had made him wonder about his own heart? He had always been loves bitch but at the same time he had been someone who had done nothing but hurt women as well. He wanted love...desperately, so desperately, that he always looked in the wrong places, namely Elena Gilbert.

He had spent most of his time, when alone which is often seeming as Elena is the only person that will talk to him, thinking about what was so good about Elena Gilbert that he was willing to risk the only companion he had in his life and the woman that had loved him so openly and freely? Elena looks just like Katherine, she's sweet though whereas Katherine who played him for a fool so many years ago. It's sad when you think about it, 1864 was a long time ago, yet he had still chased the skirt of a girl who looked like another girl. It depressing to think about, he had lost his brother and his girlfriend and for what really, it wasn't like he and Elena had confessed to some undying love that was greater then the people they hurt, it was nothing like that. They often lean on each other Elena is borderline obsessed with the idea of Katherine and Stefan, it really irritates her that Katherine gets a second chance while she gets nothing. And while she's whining, pouting and drinking he gazes as her wondering what the hell did he get to himself into?

For the last month they had been trying to figure out what exactly had drawn the two of them together, it was rather difficult doing so, only because Elena had always looked at him like she was ready to run. She didn't want him, any more then he had wanted her. They are attracted to each other that is something that they can't deny. They could never deny it, but besides that they really have nothing else. They tried secretly dating but that their dates really had consisted of the time of them having sex in her room, because well their was nothing else really to do. That stopped almost as fast as it started.

He can still remember their first date if that was what you wanted to call it. The plan was for the two of them to go out to a diner that was outside of M.F. and later go to the drive end which played classic movies. However that hadn't happen. The date had turned into a mess the moment they had dared to sit down together. For starters as much time they spent together they still looked at each other like they were each others worst enemy. They had agreed prior to their first date that they would try and figure out what was so dynamic between them that was worth losing two people they did love. That night that had found nothing. He had spent most of the night looking at the door praying to anyone who would dare to listen to him, that Bonnie and Mason would not walk through the diner doors, because not only was he unsure if he could take it but he was unsure if Bonnie could take it as well. As for Elena she had flitted between complaining about Katherine to, asking him to fix everything, to looking out for people she knew to make sure she wasn't spotted with him because after all he was the _bad guy_ and she was the _good girl_.

That night had turned out to be a bust mainly because he and Elena were either disgusted with each other or they were not as interested as they once thought. So instead of going through the painfulness of going out on another date that had decided to forgo the "dating part" and went straight to the sex. Attraction is what had brought them together so why not act on it, especially since they were free now. The only problem was that neither of them really wanted it. It had taken copious amounts of alcohol for him to even get the nerve to kiss her. As for Elena she liked to blame things on the alcohol. After three drinks she had curved her lips up into a smile and offered herself up to him, the only problem was that he didn't want him and she didn't want him either.

He could still remember the look on her face when he couldn't perform. His body hadn't responded to her, just like his heart no longer responded to her.

_Flashback_

"_Does that happen- you know...a lot?" she asked while laying on her back while staring at the ceiling._

_He turned his head in his direction. _

"_No." he said letting his blue eyes roam over her face to see a tiny bit of hurt. Elena needed to be wanted just like he needed to be wanted and needed and it appeared they didn't want each other but they needed each other because they were alone together._

_End of flashback_

That of course ended the attempt at sex. But that didn't mean they hadn't done other stuff, mostly make out. They were using each other plain and simple and it was sad because they use to be friends. It had gotten so bad then when they were following around, he never saw Elena, he always saw _her _face, imagined her butterscotch body draped over him, underneath him and the thought had freaked him out so much that he put an end to it. Elena hadn't been upset she was just as disgusted as he was. They were alone, alone together and it was the last thing either of them had wanted.

"Damon I've been listening to you say that same things for three freaking months now." Emmet the bartender says as he pours he friend a stiff drink. "What do you want? Do you want Bonnie back, do you want to be a better man for her? Do you find love with someone else, what do you want?"

He chuckles darkly. Once upon a time if someone had asked him what he wanted, he would have easily said he just wanted Katherine back. Then if you had asked him what he wanted when he first came to Mystic Falls he would say that he wanted to hurt his brother and steal his girlfriend in the process. Now he just wanted Bonnie to be happy, and he had hoped that one day it could be with him. "I want to go back in time and fix everything, I want a second chance because I don't think I've ever missed anyone as much as I miss Bonnie and Stefan right now." He says before holding his shot glass up and downing the rest of his drink.

It was official clarity sucked.

* * *

><p><strong>Caroline and Elena<strong>

Caroline Forbes walked into the grill her face all smiles. She had been gone on an extended vacation with her father. She had missed her girls and wanted nothing more then to hang out with them and catch up, but that hadn't gone accordingly to plan. Bonnie who had been volunteering as a dance instructor at the youth center had promised to teach the kids at the center a new dance today, so it was just her and Elena, which was becoming an occurrence. She had noticed that lately that the three of them had never gotten together. She had always been with Bonnie or Elena, not Bonnie and Elena and today she was going to get to the bottom of it.

Spotting Elena she smiles waving before noticing the creature at the bar. Damon, the sight of him makes her blood boil. She's sure she has never hated anyone as much as she hates Damon, in fact she is sure that when he finally bites the dust that their will be a special place in hell with his name all over it. He looks in her direction and she wanted to do nothing more then yank his pretty eyes out of its sockets and watch him walk into walls continuously. She also wanted to steal his day walking ring and watch him walk out into the sun and finally turn to dust. She gives him the finger before stalking over to Elena her once chipper mood soured.

"Wow" Elena says noticing the grim look on her friends features. "I was expecting so much more, you've yet smiled." She says watching as Caroline half smile her way.

Pouting she speaks. "I would be smiling and much happier if both of my best friends were here." She says tossing her hair over her shoulder. "I swear it's like the three of us never get a chance to hang out." She says pausing "But I can't fault Bonnie, it's not like she knew I was coming back today or else she would have been here right now." She says noticing the way Elena shifts in her seat at the mere mention of Bonnie. This has been an occurrence that has become increasing unpleasant.

Brown eyes widen at the mention of her one time friend. It had been a long time since she and Bonnie had been friends and more time that passed it seemed like the two of them would never be again. She had made an effort to talk to Bonnie but Bonnie, being Bonnie had shut her down and she was growing tired of being labeled the bad person. If they were really friends then they should be able to get through this? Yet they couldn't. All she knew was that between Bonnie giving her the silent treatment and Stefan, who was canoodling with Katherine she really didn't know what to make of her life. And then their was Damon, who often wanted to purge himself of whatever they had, and she couldn't really blame him because she wasn't as interested in Damon as she had been while with Stefan. In fact she was beginning to realize that everything she and Damon thought they had was stemming from sexual attraction that may have been built up in their heads, because the sex between the two of them was mind numbingly horrible. It was like the moment they touched even on a friendly basis, everything came crashing down around them, and all the self loathing was back at the forefront.

It was odd because when she was with Stefan, she could admit, now that they were apart that a part of her had always wondered what it would be like with Damon. Back then it was almost like they were magnets that couldn't break away from each other. They had magnetic chemistry and if she were honest lots of sexual tension, but once the deed was done, it had been a let down. And it had continued to be a let down till Damon had put a stop to their _getting it out of their systems, romp_. Damon didn't want her, and she didn't want him and now they were just kind of stuck with each other. They had built up this whole facade of what it would be like to be together if only for one time and it had backfired because when they were together, they spent the majority of the time thinking about the two people they had lost.

"God I hate him." Caroline said causing her to snap out of her thoughts.

"Who" she asked brown brows furrowed. She had missed everything that Caroline had said, but thankfully Caroline was a talker and could go on for days about one subject.

"Damon." Caroline said nodding her head in the direction of the devil. "I guess it's a good thing that Bonnie had prior engagement because the last thing she needs to see is Damon." She says before turning her attention back to her friend. "You know. I caught that jackass stalking her today." She said watching as Elena rolled her eyes. "She had come outside to talk with me and he was staring at her. And then I spotted him staring at the door of the Grill as if he was waiting for her to walk through."

She snorted. "I'm sure he wasn't stalking Bonnie." She said dismissing Caroline words. What would be the purpose of stalking Bonnie, it wouldn't change anything. "Besides Damon could have anyone he wanted. He's a century year-old vampire." She says lowering her voice. "I mean it's not like what they had was anything like what I shared with Stefan." She rattled off surprised to see that Damon who had been sitting with Ric turns a sharp head in her direction. For a moment she swears he's glaring her way, but that can't be because that would _never_ happen.

Caroline sips her drink for a moment as she processes Elena's words. Bonnie and Damon may not have had this, _I love you more then I life love life...or blood _that Stefan and Elena had shared before Katherine, or whatever it was that broke them up, but even a skeptic like herself knew that Bonnie had loved Damon, so much. "She loved him though." she says her words softening, "and as much as I hated him, the fact that she loved him made things a bit better." She says causing Elena to bring almost started brown eyes her way. " And since he's hurt her I'm gonna spend the rest of life making his full of misery." She says grinning. "And when I find out who the skank was that helped break Bonnies heart I'm gonna scare the shit out of her." Caroline says with a huge smile on her face.

Elena licks her lips and soon runs her hands down her slightly curled hair. "I don't think you should do that" she rushes out causing Caroline to look at her skeptically. "I mean Bonnie wouldn't want you to go around torturing some poor girl, who couldn't help herself." She says suddenly feeling hot. The way Caroline is looking at her makes her feel like she's under the microscope.

Caroline scuffs. "Everyone in town knew about Bonnie and Damon!" she says louder then she expected due to the looks they got from one of the servers. "This chick is a snake and while I was on vacation I made a list of girls who are suspects."

"What are you gonna do Caroline?" Elena burst suddenly. "Are you going to stalk her, beat her up, torture her?" she asked almost in hysterics before taking a deep breath. "What if this girl couldn't fight it anymore, what if she felt like she was in a losing battle, and the sexual chemistry was just too much for her?" she says not noticing the look that now crosses the blondes features as she's too busy looking down at her plate. "What if she just wanted to do something wild and crazy for once in her life." She says finally looking up to see that Caroline was wide eyed as she looked her way.

"Oh my god!" Caroline whispers because she can't believe that she had been so blind. It all made sense now. Bonnie and Elena hadn't so much as said a handful of words together since the breakup. And at first she had thought it was because Elena was so close to Damon and Bonnie was just as close to Stefan, but now it made sense. She had also noticed that the girls were never in the same place at the same time. And she had personally called Elena the night of Saint and Sinners and asked her to keep an eye on Damon so he wouldn't try to break down Bonnie, yet the next morning she found out that Bonnie had stayed at the manor, abet it was under different circumstances but still. "How could I be so blind?" she says more to herself then to Elena.

White-hot panic rose inside of her and she found herself reaching for her friends hand. Caroline was all she had left. Katherine had effectively taken Stefan away which led to taking Bonnie away as well. And Damon was only at her side because she understood him. "Caroline, whatever you're thinking..." she nearly pleads. "This is me. I put everyone ahead of myself. You know me. I would never hurt you guys on purpose I love you and I loved Bonnie!" she nearly cries. She can't lose another person, she just can't, its not fair, its not fair that the one time she does something that is for her it blows up in her face. Everyone got to do what they wanted to do and it was ok. Stefan was running around with Katherine without so much of a care in the world, especially for her. Bonnie had gotten with Damon without even thinking about how that made _her feel_, especially since Damon was her friend and bonnie had been her best friend. Bonnie hadn't thought about the fallout of her relationship with Damon and what it would do to her. As for Damon, well Damon did whatever he wanted.

"It was you." Caroline says in a whisper. "It was you." She says louder and this time people are beginning to stare their way. "I cannot believe you!" she screeches so loud almost all talking halts in the section they are sitting in.

"Caroline, keep your voice down." Elena says nervously as she notices people are starting to look at them.

"No!" Caroline says standing up. "Bonnie is our best friend." She says before correcting herself. "No correction she is _my_ best friend, clearly she meant nothing to you since you went behind her back and screwed Damon!" she says causing all conversation to stop, as whispers begin to go around. "The cats out the fucking bag now Elena, just admit it!" she says hitting the table.

She can hear footsteps and is not surprised when Matt comes over to place his hand on her shoulder. She notices that Jeremy and Tyler who were sitting with a group of girls two booths away are now near them and finally Damon is standing inches away.

"That's enough Caroline." He says blue eyes menacing. He didn't really want his business broadcasted through the Grill but Caroline had seemed to have another idea. He could take everyone knowing the details of his screw up, but one look at Elena said she was about to have a meltdown and Bonnie, he was sure she would hate that this was brought up all over again. And he was silly to think that since he had been figuring his shit out that they could try and be friends.

"Go to hell Damon, Elena can speak for herself." She says turning her eyes back to Elena who looks like a deer in headlights.

"Elena, tell Caroline she's wrong. That you weren't the girl who helped Damon break Bonnie's heart." Jeremy pleads with his sister.

Elena looks up at the people in front of her, her friends and family and for the first time realizes what her actions have done, what repercussions are headed her way. She would never be the same. The town would label her a whore. She would no longer be, sweet innocent Elena Gilbert. The girl that boys couldn't help but fall in love with, her reputation was ruined. She catches eyes with Damon before looking over to Jeremy. "I can't Jere. Its true Bonnie and Stefan caught me and Damon together."

Gasps went all around as people who were listening whispered to friends and sent out text messages, phone calls and posted the newest gossip on every social network available.

Caroline chuckles darkly before lounging in the direction of one time friend. " You disgust me, " she says only to be stopped by Tyler who wrapped his arm around her waist.

"No Caroline please." Elena calls standing up. "What happened was really bad but it's between me and Bonnie, not me and you."

"Your wrong Elena, bonnie is my best friend and I will not betray her by associating myself with the bitch who screwed her boyfriend." She says breaking away from Tyler. For a moment they lock eyes and she feels electricity run through her before she turns her sights back to Elena. She would give Damon a piece of her mind but talking to him was like talking to a brick wall, it served no purpose.

Tears fill brown eyes. " Caroline! You-you don't mean that."

Caroline rolls her eyes. "I mean it." She says before climbing up on the table and announcing the news to everyone who is daring to listen in on the public spectacle that Elena Gilbert was a backstabber who went behind her friends back and screwed her boyfriend. When she was finished, she dropped the deuces walking out of the Grill. She didn't care if people thought she had been dramatic, the good thing was everyone knew the truth about Elena.

In a huff she marched to the dance studio and got half way to the dance studio when suddenly she hears Tyler Lockwood calling her name. Spinning around she nearly collides into him.

"You sure do know how to make an entrance." Tyler says a smirk playing on his lips. "One of the things I've always liked about you is the fact that you aren't afraid to fight dirty."

She smiles his way. "Bonnie is my best friend, and I stick up for my friends."

He grins "Good to know." He says his brown eyes boring into her blue ones. "Listen since Bonnie is your best friend and all and she's dating my uncle, maybe when she comes over to the mansion you could come over as well."

She smiles once again, was Tyler like trying to flirt with her. "I'll keep that in mind."

He nods his head before turning around in the hopes of going back to the grill before stopping again. "It's good to have you back Caroline. The town certainly isn't as boring without you." He says as his eyes roam about her before leaving.

She smiled momentarily before noticing that Elena and Damon were now walking out of the Grill. She locked eyes with blue eyes and raised a brow before flouncing in the direction of the dance studio, she needed to talk to Bonnie and stat.

* * *

><p><strong>Bonnie<strong>

I had just finished my last dance class for the day when Caroline had rushed into the studio like a bat out of hell.

"Hey what's wrong." I asked seeing the determined look in her eyes.

"I talked to Elena today." Caroline said looking forward. The thought of knowing that Bonnie had suffered without her was heart breaking. She knew that Stefan had known because they were like kindred souls or something like that.

"Oh." I said my back stiff. It was amazing how the mere mention of Elena could still send me over the edge. Putting my brave face on I spoke. "What about?"

"I'm your best friend right?" she asked sliding down into a sitting position on the floor. "Well I'm one of your best friends aside from Stefan who's like your best friend soulmate." she said grimacing only for a moment before rolling her eyes. Stefan and Bonnie, were Stefan and Bonnie and you couldn't fault them for the love they had for each other. But sometimes she wanted Bonnie as her number one best friend and for Stefan to just let her have girl time.

"Of course." I say slinging a lazy arm around her shoulder as I smile her way. "You're my soul sister!" I say with a smile only for it to drop once I see the pain in her eyes. "Carebear." I call.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked tears threatening to spill from her eyes. "If I'd known...if I'd known."

I felt my back go rigid as my heart sped up. She knew, and the pained look on her face was what I had been trying to avoid. "You know?" I asked already knowing the answer. I felt my eyes well up with tears. I didn't like to think about it, Damon and Elena. I had moved on and I just wanted to put it all behind me, all of it. "I didn't want you to have to chose between two people you loved." I said softly.

"Bon don't you get it, it'll always be you and me. You're my soul sister...my family and family sticks together." she says hugging me to her.

I chuckle despite the topic. "Im sorry Carebear."

She strokes her friends hair. The only thing that mattered now was that Bonnie was happy and she was with Mason and that Elena was getting what she deserved by failing in the eyes of the people that adored her. "It okay, you can make it up to me by letting me tag along when you visit your hunky boyfriend so I can flirt with Tyler." she grins

We soon burst into giggles. It was good to have Caroline back, I missed my girl.

_Three months and im still sober_

_picked all my weeds _

_and kept the flowers_

_song lyrics: sober and maybe by kelly clarkson_

**spoilers**_:_ Bonnie and Elena have a showdown, Elena spirals downward and soon we will delve into everything. plus Bonnies father makes an appearance and Mason/Bonnie

**A.N.2.** This chapter was not part of my outline but when reread the chapter i thought it might be interesting. the next chapter is a bit of a continuation so it'll be up quickly because its already written. The little bit of delena in this chapter was all that will ever be in this story, although they will continue to have scenes together it'll be out of friendship. i couldn't commit to putting them together. As always drop me a line, tell me what you think.


	13. Chapter 12

**A.N. Hey all I'm back with another update! As always thanks for showing me some love with this fic! I've been rewriting this chapter for eons now and finally I've come up with something i'm satisfied with. the soundtrack to this chapter, or at least part of this chapter is "light years away" by mozella. i suggest you listen to it, when you get the urge. Enjoy**

**special thanks to: babyshan211, aprilf00l, jewelsstars, trickst3r-97, and Brazilianfan1**

**xoxo**

**queena**

**Chapter 12: Light Years Away**

I had found myself at the Lockwood mansion with yet another mission that only my boyfriend could help me with. Dressed in something that may give him an incentive which just so happens to be his button down light blue shirt that is cuffed at my elbows along with black tights and my new favorite pair of black boots that go over my knee, Mason had loved seeing me in his shirts and I hoped the image alone would get him to help me with my newest mission.

Without a care, I enter the mansion finding it eerily silent. And then I heard it, the loud sound of oohs and ahhs. Boys would be boys which meant they were playing video games. Walking into the game room, I found it full with the normal suspects, Mason, Tyler, Jase and Matt. Which was typical what wasn't so typical was the fact that Jules was sitting among the guys. That had gotten my attention. Jules and I were still not on the best terms to put it simple, we didn't like each other. I had a sneaking suspicion she had wanted to be more then friends with my boyfriend which didn't sit well with me at all. Apparently she had a boyfriend she had been seeing for a very long time, yet I'd never seen Brady. Sure she had spoke about him and Mason had even mentioned how he was one of his best friends, but if the Elena situation had taught me nothing it taught me to pay close attention to my instincts and my instincts were telling me to watch Jules.

I stand in the doorway with a knowing look on my features and wave over to the guys before being bombarded by Matt, and Tyler. I hadn't seen Matt in a bit so it was really good to see him. He gave me one of his famous hugs that usually made everything all better and it made me miss the days when we were all still connected. Next was Tyler who gave me a smirk before we did our famous handshake and followed by a hug. I waved to a few of Masons friends that I hadn't realized were inside of the game room before glancing his direction.

Our eyes met briefly before Jules of all people came over to talk to me.

Mason had watched from afar the interaction between his girlfriend and hi friends before swiftly moving her way. He ignored the way the temperature in the room shifted, he also ignored the fact that all talking had seized or maybe he had tuned out all the noise because the only thing he saw was her, and the only thing that flashed in his mind was here was his woman standing in front of him...here for him and he needed to be at her side. He smiled her way and stopped in front of her running his eyes over her tiny body as if it were the first time he had ever seen her.

When Mason had made his way over to me, I bit my lip at the look he had given me. Everytime Mason looked my way, it was so primal, something that was both thrilling and a bit frightening at the same time, but it was the good kind of scared, the kind that made your heart beat in a constant drum beat. Mason had the power to either reduce me to a giggling school girl or bring out the woman that I had become. "Hey." I say when he's a breath away from me. I find myself placing a chaste kiss onto his lips which I'm rewarded with a heart stopping smile. "Can I talk to you?" I say while using my thumb to wipe off the remnants of my lip gloss.

"Yeah." He says resisting the urge to touch her. Whenever she was near him all he wanted to do was hold her. It had been three months since she had chosen him and he was still just as captivated, as enamored with her as he had been from the moment their eyes had met that first night. He was admittedly addicted and hadn't fallen so fast since Katherine.

Bonnie was everything that wanted and she just so happen to want him-so he didn't care if the whole town thought he was whipped on a girl who was in her late teens. Bonnie was the only thing he cared about, she was the only thing that mattered...they were the only thing that mattered- haters be damned. "Lets go somewhere without interruptions." He says casting a look in the direction of his friends who were pretending that they hadn't been watching or listening. Well everyone except for Jules, who had her lips twisted. He turned his head back in the direction of Bonnie and soon led her away from his friends, his hand on her lower back, the sooner they were alone the better.

**BB-ML**

"Is there a reason you came to the mansion looking like that?" he asked he blue green eyes roaming over me. I say nothing and soon tug on his white wife beater so that he is in front of the comfy sofa and push him down on it with a flick of the wrist. He blue green eyes light up as the colors blend for only a second before a hint of yellow shines through.

Fast hands reach out for me and soon I'm sitting with my back to him. He nuzzles his nose in my hair and I let out a content sigh. This was how it was supposed to be, the person you were with was supposed to make you happy, make you feel like you were on top of the world. Tender kisses start trailing just below my ear and I know that now is the best time to bring up my great idea!

"So I was thinking tonight would be the perfect night to spend it with our friends." I say tilting my head to the side to give him better access. My words are coming out in pants as his hands are roaming underneath my shirt and resting on my belly."And during your boys night, you can invite Stefan to join you!" I say causing his hands to suddenly go still.

I turned around on his lap so that I was now straddling him. "So what do you think?" I ask while drawing shapes on his abs. I smile up at him hopefully. If Mason would agree to my plan, this would be the first night we had really spent apart since making everything official. We had gotten into a pattern of always sleeping in the same bed together and even when one of us had tried to fight it because everything between the two of us had gone at lightening speed; we had still wound up sleeping together.

"Bonnie" he nearly ground out while she looked up at him innocently. He knew she adored Stefan that was something he had come to terms with, but he had never thought she would push the two of them together so soon. The guy looked like he didn't know the meaning of fun. He could imagine them looking at each other in silence before they started talking about Bonnie which was the only thing that had in common. Stefan would probably even try and stake his claim as her best friend and he'd be annoyed by yet another Salvatore brother. "Are you serious?"

I lean forward and rest my forehead against his. "Yes." I say pulling back to look at him "Stefan has lost his only male companion and I think it might be good for him to get out and have fun. And he needs guy friends or a guy friend and you would be perfect." I rattled on while Mason looked my way amused. "You guys can go on a man date and get to know each other better, ya know since you're the men in my life." I say smiling cheekily his way.

He bit back a grin. This girl had him literally wrapped around her little finger. He'd agree of course to spend time with Stefan because it would make her happy, but that didn't mean he would make it easy on her. She'd have to work for it. "Guys don't go on man dates." He says watching as her green eyes light up at his words. She moves closer to him as if that's possible since she's straddling his lap.

I gave him pointed look. "You go on man dates all the time. You just went out with Jase the other day." I pointed out triumphantly.

"That was different." He says using his fingers to pop open yet another button of his shirt that is adorning her body so that he can get another peak of the black lace that lye underneath. His plan had been to distract her because really he'd rather spend his time with her then go out with the guys. His friends were mostly single and he knew they'd want to ogle other girls when he had no intention to do so, not when he had Bonnie all to himself. And as for going out with Stefan well, he wasn't feeling that either.

I stilled his hands causing him playfully eyes to look up at me as we held hands. "Please." I say simply and something in his eyes changes at the small word. "I worry about him sometimes." I admit softly. "I mean I know he has his girlfriend and all I just don't want him to get in too deep too fast and the two of you becoming friends would put to rest all those tall tales about vampires and werewolves." I whisper in his ear.

He looked at her, really looked at her and couldn't help but roll her eyes. Bonnie was such a mother hen but that was one of the qualities he loved...liked about her she had a big heart. "Fine." He says as if its killing him. But the smile she rewards him with is enough for him.

"Good!" I say excitedly before nipping at his bottom lip. I had a lot of things to do before my girls night so I needed to get going. I hop off of him and head to the door when his voice stops me.

"But, its gonna cost you." He says now standing to his full height. He saunters her way and wraps his arms around her waist. "You know that thing I've been begging you do for me?"

I mentally cringe before turning in his arms. "Yes." I say placing my palm on his cheek.

"Do you think you're ready to try it now?" he asked biting back a grin. "You'll love it, I promise."

"Mason." I whine. _That_ was something had never done with _anyone_ and thinking about it made me shiver, it was gross but Mason had done something for me, the least I could do was return the favor. "Fine but I need a few days in advance to know when I'm gonna do it." I say resisting the urge to shiver.

He winks her way. "Perfect. So it's settled we are going camping in the near future."

I can't help but smile at the happy look that crosses his features. "Yeah we are going camping in the near future." I repeat. "Now come on before everyone thinks I stole you away for a quickie."

He smirked before swatting her butt. "Anytime anyplace Bennett." He says causing her to roll her green eyes.

**SS-SS-SS**

**Stefan**

Stefan Salvatore stood in the doorway watching as Katherine had stood in the middle of his bedroom a glass of blood in hand. He noted that she was wearing his old Bon Jovi shirt with her long curly hair piled high above her head. He almost smiles at the recent change in her, it appeared she was starting to take note of Bonnie's hair decisions. And she was happy, so happy she smiled and it wasn't with hidden meaning, it was genuine.

"What are you doing?" he asked causing Katherine to spin around and smirk at him. He let his eyes rake over her in his favorite shirt.

She grinned his way, before licking raiments of blood of her lip. "I'm deciding what to bring tonight."

He grinned back before flashing her way so that he was in her ear. He wrapped his arm around her lower torso hiking the shirt up with his every word. "No need to be nervous Kat," he says as his hands come to rest at her naked stomach. "It's just a little girl on girl action." He says grinning against the shell of her ear.

She smirked and soon pushed him clear across the room so that he was now on the bed. She watched as he got comfortable and placed his hands behind his head, "You'd like that wouldn't you?" she asked straddling his waist. "Me and Bonnie." She asked removing his shirt.

"I'd love it." He says his eyes tracing her every move. He knew they were playing, he was seeing how far he could push her, and she was just playing along. He watches as she dips her finger into the glass of blood and soon paints her lips.

"Me too." She says leaning forward. "Maybe we can make a night of tonight, me and Bonnie of course." She says inches away from his face.

He smirks. "Maybe." He says playing along as his hands grip her hips holding her in place. "But you don't want Bonnie."

She raises a brow. "Are you sure?"

He chuckles. "Okay."He relents. "You want Bonnie as a friend, but you _want_ me." He rasps out.

"Who do you _want?_"she says placing a kiss to his naked chest leaving an lip stain with blood on it.

He pulls her down to him. "I want you Katherine." He says before reaching up to seal his lips onto hers only to find air.

"Good" Katherine says with her hands on her hips. "Now you can help me pick out what to bring for this girls night." She says holding up garters with a smile.

**BB-BB-BB**

"What's up B.F.?" I ask while pushing the cart through the grocery store.

"Bunny, I was just calling to make sure that everything is set for tonight? You're sure about having Katherine over at your house?" he asked his tone slightly worried.

I frowned. "Why are you already getting cold feet about your man date?" I ask my lips curling up into a smile. "Or do you think I might actually stake your girlfriend?" I asked jokingly. Stefan chuckles and I smile into the phone. It's good to hear him laugh as if he's happy and really I think he is.

He lets out a shaky sigh."Katherine is not my girlfriend." He says though the words are unconvincing. "She's nervous, so do me a favor and go easy on her okay?" he says slowly as if he's processing the words.

I lick my lips. "Anything for you my love. Now enjoy your man date!" I say almost too excitedly because Stefan chuckles before muttering I love you and soon ending our call.

I can't help but smile after my conversation with Stefan. He was totally crushing on Katherine and normally I would be highly pissed off and super protective but he was happy. You could hear the happiness in his voice I liked hearing that because he deserved to be happy. I was so lost in my thoughts that I had crash into a hard body with my cart.

"I am so sorry. This cart has a mind of its own!" I say as my face heats up. I say to the stranger with his back to me. "I promise I wasn't trying to run you over." I say causing the stranger to turn around and it's then that I see ice blue glacier eyes that I hadn't seen in so long. I sucked in a breath at the mere sight of him. He of course was dressed in dark clothes. Sporting a dark grey long sleeved thermal shirt with the top two buttons undone and black jeans. Damon had looked like nothing had happen. But there was something behind his steel eye.

I let out a gasp. I hadn't seen him since that fateful morning at the manor so long ago. I had made a conscious decision to remove myself from any situation where he might be. That of course didn't mean that I hadn't heard about him, because well people liked to talk. It was almost like he was a ghost, my ghost but now he was standing in front of me, real to the touch. "Damon." I say surprised to see him.

"Bonnie." He said his breath catching at the mere sight of her. It had been a long time since he had seen her like this..if ever? Her hair was longer, and darker it made her green eyes stand out and immediately made you look her way. To him she looked beautiful, comfortable in her own skin and what she had been wearing had made her look even more desirable. He had always loved her in a pair of heels, this time she was sporting boots that had given her added height and made her legs look long. And then their was the mens shirt that adorned her tiny body. The first four buttons were undone giving him private viewing of the hint of lace that was beneath the shirt.

He had briefly wondered if someone was playing a cruel joke on him. The scent of gardenia mixed with vanilla and honey had hit him hard making him think of her. He thought it was the copious amounts of booze he had been drinking that had his mind playing tricks on him, but it wasn't a mirage, a fantasy, no Bonnie was in front of him. Standing in front of him was the girl who held his heart in her hands without even really knowing it.

When she clears her throat, he stops raking his eyes over her and finally meets those piercing green eyes. "You look good." He says strained as her green eyes shine up at him. "You look happy." He says carefully. It was so obvious that she was getting better with every day that passed, with every moment that she had spent away from him. It was better for her...harder for him. Everyday was harder then the day before without her.

Im silent for a few moments. It's hard to stand in front of Damon and act like we hadn't been through hell together. It was even harder looking at him and have him looking at me the way I had always wanted him to look at me, like I was the only girl for him. Especially since I had realized that he wasn't the only guy for me. My eyes dart all over him before I finally meet his. "You" pause "You look good to." I say offhandedly though my words are strained.

He looks down at her through thick black lashes as blue eyes dance despite the situation. He tries not to stare too long but its hard not to. It hurts being without her. And he's positive the longer he stays in her presence knowing that he can't have her, that she wont come back to him, the more it'll hurt. But the pleasure he gets from being close to her outweighs the pain that is in chest for not having her. "It's been a long time." he says finally those words are slow as if he's trying to stop time so that they could stay in this moment.

"Yeah" I say for better lack of words. I bite at my lip my words for a moment before speaking. "This is weird right?" I ask suddenly. It was still hard being around Damon, even after all this time. We had been through hell and back together and it was difficult to pretend otherwise. I knew we couldn't possibly avoid each other forever but being here...seeing him it brought back memories that I had wanted to fade away. The longer the time lapsed the more I wanted to keep it moving and run away yet I stayed rooted in my place unable to move forward, and unwilling to run away.

He licks his teeth while digging his hands in his pockets. He was slightly nervous which never happened. "It doesn't have to be weird." he says pausing to steal a look in her direction. "It's never going to be easy though." he admitted. He may have been surprised to see her at first, it may have been hard to be around her and now have her as his own but now that he thought about it, this was perfect if they could talk and act normal, or as normal as two ex's could be when one had cheated on the other. It would prove to her that maybe one day they could be friends.

And to prove his point he starts talking with an ease that hadn't been in their earlier encounter.

"You know." he says rattles with a tiny smile. "I never thought I'd see the day when you of all people stepped foot in a grocery store alone."He says exaggerating with his eyes. He watched as she cracked a grin. Bonnie was not known for her cooking skills. She was good at making you feel better, she could bake cookies, she could even save the town but the girl couldn't cook to save her life. "The world must be ending or your on a junk food binge." he muses.

I rolled my eyes, Damon would always be dramatic. "Relax grandpa. " I say only to interrupted.

He cocked his head to one side. "I prefer being called daddy but you know that already." He says with a wink. It was nice engaging in quick banter with her again it made his insides warm and he longed for the day that they use to verbally assault one another as a prelude to tongues dueling and bodies twirling around causing harsh pants and beads of sweat to break out on their skin.

A sudden chill runs up his spine at the thought of them and he soon fights to remember what they were talking about. Food. He see's the list in her hand and soon snatches it to make a point and notices all the crap he had try to get her to avoid. Teenagers.

I rolled my eyes and soon snatched the list that he was now dangling my way with an eyebrow arched as if he had proven some point. Yeah I liked to eat junk food, he had gotten me to like vegetables and fish and lots of other foods. "I eat better then you think." I say deciding to leave it like that. Damon didn't need to know that Mason was teaching me how to cook and I actually didn't mind it, I wouldn't want to do it for a living but it was nice to do things together.

A pause in the conversation due to phone call by her boyfriend gives him time to let his mind wander. He's always been an excellent liar but he feels like he's falling apart at the seams. He trying his best to be the Damon she's always known, confidant and cocky but really his stomach is in knots. Seeing her so happy on the inside and out is killing him, she radiating happiness. And he doesn't understand it. He doesn't understand how she can be okay and he finds himself barely hanging on, if it weren't for the booze and blood he was sure he'd loose his mind.

He leans against the parked cart and runs his hand through is hair. He had always imagined the next time he would see Bonnie would be because neither of them could stand being apart. Maybe it was due to the fact that he had been spending time with Elena who wanted to watch epic romantic movies where the boy and girl end up together only so she can cry her eyes out because she had lost Stefan. But really if he were being honest with himself he was a romantic at heart. He had been having this running dream where he and Bonnie had gotten back together. His dream had been just like that first night. But instead of her wandering over to the manor he'd end up at her house and then he'd tell her everything he had been thinking since letting her go, he'd tell her everything he had been holding back for so long and then of course he'd get his fill of her. But no, he ran into her in the grocery store of all places, which was odd because one he doesn't really need to eat human food and two she hates shopping altogether.

"So, what brings you to the grocery store of all places. You hate shopping, so this must be big." he says widening his eyes.

A smile forms on my lips. "I'm actually having a slumber party!" Tonight Caroline and I were going to show Katherine that their was more to life then just killing people and or seducing brothers who will in turn hate each other for centuries. My grocery list was packed with all kinds of treat I thought Katherine should totally try with a group of girls. My plan was to send her back to Stefan on cloud nine.

He furrows his brows and then shakes his head. Bonnie and Stefan were notorious for having sleepovers which was a tad bit weird but given the connection his brother and ex girlfriend had he understood it. He had to admit it had bothered him for a long time, but now that he was no longer part of the inner circle, he was glad that Bonnie had someone like Stefan to take care of her and vice versa because they deserved to have someone like each other in their lives.

He quirks his lip up. "Seriously how many friendship bracelets can you and Stefan make?" he says throwing a bag chips in her cart because well, he knew she would get them eventually. Spinning around he looks her way. "We get it , your best friends till the end." he deadpan.

I push him aside and grab another bag of chips. "Don't be an ass! I'm having Katherine and Caroline over. Besides Stefan is going on a man date with Mason." I say instantly shutting my mouth at the look he gives me. His glacier eyes which were once dancing are suddenly stone cold and we both know why. Damon although he would never admit, missed his brother and I knew Stefan had missed Damon the same, but it was too early to bury the hatchet.

He sucks his teeth trying to pretend that everything is okay when its far from okay. It hurts knowing that his brother is on a traitorous man date with his enemy, with the same man that had taken his girlfriend away from him. It was bad enough the Mason had managed to steal Bonnie away from his grasp, but had gotten worse when he had made a move on his brother.

I'm sorry." I say suddenly. I hated seeing Damon hurt, I hated knowing that I had hurt him the words just flew out of my mouth and I didn't think.

He pouts his lips for only a second before turning his attention elsewhere. Like the slumber party from hell. He'd love to be a fly on the wall at the Bennett house tonight, he might even have to drop by so he could see everything live in action, in crow form of course.

"You do know that Katherine has a thing for Bennett witches? So this girls night will only further her infatuation with you." He says grinning at her upturned mouth. "And lets not forget about Caroline, she a possessive little thing when it comes you." Pause. " This slumber party is going consist of the two of them fighting over you."

I swat at him we he continues to grin my way causing my heart to race. "Stop trying to freak me out. This slumber party is going to be kick ass!" I say as he looks away.

"If you really want to see two supernatural get in the ring to fight over you tell your boy anytime anyplace." he says as she glares his way. "Ok forget I said that." he says nonchalantly. "Why did you invite Katherine of all people over to your house?"

I shrug my shoulders. "I just want to move forward and I'm trying this new thing called forgiveness." I say causing him blanch at my words. In his eyes I see hope in them and decide to keep talking because if I look in his way I might drown in those deep blue eyes. "Besides Katherine has never really done anything to me and despite the fact that she can be a raging bitch, she's fun to be around!" I say with a smile.

He looks her over slightly amused. "Your girl crushing on Katherine." he muses with a shit eating grin on his face. He had been swept up in everything that was Katherine so he couldn't talk trash but Bonnie was the last person he thought would fall for her charms. He had admit she was turning out to be a better friend then he had ever thought she would. Despite the fact that he was sure that Katherine had wanted to nail his ex girlfriend, she had been rather nice which was saying a lot.

I roll my eyes. "Please unlike some." I said looking his way pointedly. "I'm not easily charmed...you of all people should know that." I say easily dismissing his notion.

Something about the way her eyes sparkled the way she was talking her trash stirred something inside of him, before he knew what he was doing he had invaded her personal space, boxing her with his body and isle. He reached out and stroked her face, a smirk on his lips. "Care to test that theory." he says inhaling the scent of vanilla that flowed off of her skin. He knew he was probably taking things too far, but it had been so long since he had seen her this close up, since he had her in his arms.

I swallow hard at his sudden nearness. "Damon, don't do this." I say as he makes no move to remove himself from uncaging me. I was happy, I hoped he knew that- him letting me go had been the best thing for me. "Damon." I say again as his glacier eyes bore into mine yet again.

He licks his lips. "I just wanted to hear the sound of your rushed heartbeat." he nearly whispers as his blue eyes bore into green eyes.

We had been so caught up in our stare that when one of my neighbors passed the two of us and cleared her throat as she wanted to get something behind me, I nearly jumped out of my skin. My face was lit aflame as Damon had finally given me some breathing room. Mrs. Williams grabbed her things and soon moved on but now before looking back at the two of us scandalized.

"You do know that she'll have your neighbors depends in a knot after seeing the two of us speaking." he says matter of fact. "In fact she might even go as far as to say that we were having public sex in the grocery store." he says while she looked at him unamused. Though her cheeks were starting to turn a fine shade of pink. "I'm just saying your boyfriend might get jealous if he hears anything from walkie talkie." he says with a leer.

At the mere mention of Mason I straighten up and look around. I didn't want people to get the wrong idea, I wasn't having some illicit affair with Damon. Nor had I purposely run into him, we were just two people in a small town who happen to run into each other. However I knew that would no satisfy the gossipers of Mystic Falls. "I don't want to talk about Mason." I say retrieving my cart as I continue to walk down the isle. Damon seems to have forgotten what he came to the store for, because he's following me.

"Ok." he says whilst trailing behind her. His eyes run over her backside twice and he realizes that she's probably on her way out. He did want to talk to her, about things with her mother. "How about Alexandra then?" he calls out causing her to stop in her tracks. Her back is stiff and he wonders what exactly had happen. He had been cut out of her life so, he was unsure if she had gotten any leads or if she had given up looking for things.

I bit my lip for a second before turning around to see that Damon was right behind me. "She hasn't contacted me again." I say with a slight pause. "But I've been having these dreams and when I'm not dreaming I have these episodes where its like I get a glimpse into what she's been through." I admit softly. I had promised Mason that I would stop delving into everything that was my parents for a bit because it was starting to take a toll of me, but I couldn't shake the feeling that something big was going to happen and soon.

He marches over to her and grabs her shoulders. "You have to promise me that you'll be careful, that if you need help you'll ask for it." he says while trying to get a hold of his own emotions. The thought of her hurt had scared him and if her mother had been able to speak to her before and leave her unconscious who says she wouldn't do it again. "And if you ever need me...promise me that you'll call for me." he says his eyes never leaving hers.

He may have not been able to salvage their relationship but he'd be damn if he let anything happen to her. He would save her, he'd save her the way he should've saved their relationship.

"I promise." I whisper out and when he reaches his hand out to stroke my face my body goes still and I know he knows because he's soon retracted his hands as if he's burned. Our eyes meet and just as I'm about to bid him adieu I hear a familiar voice causing my blood to run cold. I turn around to spot Elena with an expression that is truly tortured. Its almost as if she's m livid by the scene in front of her and giddy at the same time.

"Damon and Bonnie, together again, that certainly didn't take long." Elena muses as she stands at the end of the isle, a box of oops all berries in her hand. She's wearing a perfectly practiced Mona Lisa smile while her hair is slightly curled. In a nutshell she is in the process of turning herself into Katherine.

He eyes her almost suspiciously. Elena had been drinking which had proven never to be a good thing. She had a loose mouth and body with a couple of shots and since she had been blaming just about everyone, mainly Bonnie and Katherine for her sudden downfall he knew he needed to let Bonnie go and enjoy her party so he could take care of Elena. She was after all his friend.

"How about I get your cereal and you go back to the car and wait for me." he says standing in front of him. He expected her to say something but instead she just ignored him and turned in the direction of Bonnie.

She said nothing and looked between Damon and Bonnie before settled on Damon once more all the while fingering a lock of her now slightly curly hair. Her hair hadn't curled to the extremes as Katherine, but it was an improvement from her straight and sleek look. Turning her eyes once more to her former friend she spoke.

"I knew it was only a matter of time before you slipped up and you did. You have the whole town thinking you're a saint yet here you are with your ex boyfriend pressed up against you." Elena says with a smirk. " I was waiting for Damon to kiss you because we all know that one kiss is all it took to get your clothes off the first time." she says in a whisper. "Maybe I should let Mason in on the little secret, and tell him just how close his girlfriend had been with her ex, you think he'd like that Bonnie?" she asked slowly. "That way I can rip your life apart like you did to mine." she says feeling better then she had felt in weeks. Bonnie had help take away everything from her and now finally she was getting her turn to shine in the sunlight once again. She didn't deserve the treatment she had gotten from her friends nor most of the town. She had been gossiped about and not because everyone loved her, or even loved to hate her but because she had unthinkable dared to hurt Bonnie.

I blinked once twice while looking at Elena, was she really trying to threaten me. A slow bubble of laugher crept up from down deep and suddenly I'm giggling with tears streaming down my face. "Your serious aren't you? Your daring to threaten me? The same girl who can't even bother to save herself?" I say before giggling again. This whole situation was laughable. Elena had become nothing but a big joke.

Elena stomps her foot like a toddler who doesn't get their way. Her brown eyes darken. "It's not a threat, it's a promise. You're the reason Stefan wont forgive me, so I think it's fair that I mess with your relationship."

My giggles had died down as I now smirked her way. "Go ahead I dare you." I say retrieving my cell from the front pocket of my shirt. "You can call him if you want, and you can tell him whatever you want." I say offering my phone. Mason knew me and once I agreed to be his girlfriend everyone else faded away. "Go ahead, I dare you." I say again

I had once been a pushover when it came to Elena but that stopped a long time ago. I wasn't going to let her tear down my world because she was upset hers wasn't going the way she had hoped. As I suspected she let out a huff and crossed her arms in front of her chest. I was waiting for the moment when the tears came, but they never came, she just looked at me like I was the _bad_ person in all of this. Typical, Elena 101.

"I loved you Bonnie." Elena cried.

Typical Elena. "I don't want your kind of love." I say through gritted teeth.

Elena laughs. "I made a mistake, one mistake! she says pausing to look over at Damon before looking at Bonnie again. "I don't deserve what you're doing to me." she cries.

I opened my mouth but no words came out. Elena was still under the impression that the world revolved around her. It was really sad because she had lost touch of reality. She was no longer the girl she used to be. "You blew your own life apart, so stop blaming everyone else, do us all a favor and pick up the damn pieces and move on because everyone else has!" I say my voice rising with every word.

She shook her head. This wasn't her fault this was Bonnie's fault! "You couldn't wait to take everything away from me!" she accused glaring at the one person that was truly in the way of her getting the happy ending she had always wanted in life. "You took Stefan and Caroline and turned everyone against me because you were always jealous of me!" she declared loudly.

My brows raised to my hairline and I turned my head to look at Damon who wore a bored expression as he looked between me and Elena. I had a feeling he was a bit more invested in this argument then he wanted to let on. Turning my attention back to Elena, I felt my fingers itch as she continued to blame me for her problems. What I wanted to do was bitch slap her out of my way, but that probably would've played into her hand. Elena wanted to play the victim, it was the only role she knew how to play. "Are you being serious right now Elena?"

She took a step forward. "You wanted Stefan the first time you laid eyes on him, but he wanted me and you-you settled for being the always noble friend. You wanted a family like mine, but lets face it you've got no family." she says a ghost of a smile on her lips.

I schooled my features to not show how hurt I was by her words. That was low even for a backstabbing bitch like Elena. She knew, she knew how much it hurt me to not be loved by parents, that I felt like nobody loved me except for my friends. The lights in the grocery store flickered as I tried to control my anger. I knew I shouldn't let her get to me, but she had no idea what I was dealing with. She was just reacting to not having the world revolve around her.

"I wouldn't look so smug, Mystic Falls is a town full of orphans." I say as the lights continue to flicker.

Elena smiles about to say something else when he suddenly flashes over to her and soon grips her arm. "It's time for you to go back to the car now Elena!" he says his voice dark and angry. He figured that the two girls needed to get this out of their systems but now was not the time, especially since Bonnie was still dealing with issue with her parents.

"No." she says wrenching her arm out of his grasp. She looked at him with big brown eyes hoping to sway him when he suddenly had disappeared and was now talking to Bonnie. For a moment she feels jealous but not because she wants Damon because she doesn't, but because everyone is tripping over themselves to make Bonnie happy.

He placed both hands deep in his pockets something he had only seen Stefan do about a million times. What he really wants to do is wrap his arms around her and hold on for dear life. He wants to tell her that she is loved but refrains from doing so. "Bon, go enjoy your party and have fun." he says with a weary smile.

I shake my head and step in front of him so that I'm standing in front of Elena. "Is that all you've got?" I asked with a curved lips.

Elena licks her lips despite the fact that she's taken a step back. "You have no idea what I'm capable of Bonnie. You ruined my life...you hurt me and now I'm gonna hurt you."

I was so freaking tired of hearing her whine about her life, her feelings. She didn't give a damn about anyone else but herself. She didn't care that she hurt Stefan or me she just cared about what she wanted and what she needed. "Will you stop already." I burst finally fed up with her whining. "You are such a whiner Elena, all you ever do is whine." I say with an eye roll. "Help, Stefan...Damon I'm stuck to the railroad tracks save me." I say mimicking her. "Why don't you for the first time ever face reality."

Elena crosses her arms in front of herself almost protectively. "Oh really you want me to face reality. I'll gladly face it Bonnie, if you face it with me." she says she says glancing at Damon briefly. He was ready to make a move but their was no need. "You know that _night_- that night where you and Damon slept together." she says with an eye roll. "It wasn't about Damon not being able to contain himself around you any longer." she says with a pause. "It was about me." she says with a triumphant smile at the look that crosses her one time friends features. "He confessed it to me, the next day. So you see you were nothing but a warm body that he could sink himself into." she says in a whisper.

I looked down letting my bangs fall into my face. Hearing the words had always hurt. But it hurt even more knowing that Elena had said those things to me on purpose. I looked down at my feet and blinked several time before facing her. "You think I didn't know that already- you'll have to do much better then that Elena, because I knew that night it was all about you." I say shocking her with the truth.

I smile her way as she shakes her head as if a fog has fallen over her. "Now here is your reality you need to face. Stefan is so much better without you. He's happier," I say taking a step closer to her. "Katherine is so much better for him then you'll ever be." I say finally. "She doesn't lie to him, she loves him and she means it when she says it." I say whisper out while pulling back from her.

I watched as fury filled her alarmed eyes and when she reaches her hand back I know she's gearing up to slap me and I'm ready for it but Damon swiftly cut her off.

"Don't you touch her...I mean it Elena.' he says his eyes flashing because of his sudden anger. He can feel the veins creeping up and fights his vampire instincts. He had shared blood with Bonnie and in the back of his mind she had belonged to him, even while she was with Mason, and the thought of seeing anyone strike her had called to the alpha male in him.

Outraged she speaks with her arms flying around wildly. "Your taking her side. You do know that she's screwing Mason Lockwood?" she says getting nothing but a stormy look thrown her way. "Fine do whatever you want, but remember I'm all you have left and your all I have left." She says turning on her heel.

"Elena go." he says again his voice stern and beyond tired. Since when had he been the adult of any situation. Elena was out of control, no more drinking for her. He was beginning to think that Stefan had kept her sane and without him she was mess.

I watch silently as Elena heads to the end of the isle as if waiting for Damon to follow her and when he doesn't she flounces off, hopefully to hell.

"Aren't you going to go chase after her." I ask my eyes looking down at my list as if Elena hadn't purposely tried to hurt me. I needed to remind Caroline or Katherine to get the drinks because I had a feeling tonight would be a perfect drinking night. "You can be her hero, it'll be much easier for you to get into her pants."

He pokes his lip out. He had no intention of chasing Elena, nor was he interested in _that way_. He did however understand her in some small way, he understood the rage. " Listen about what she said...she didn't mean it. She's just going through a lot right now." He says feeling as if her green eyes had lit with laser and was scorching his skin.

I couldn't believe him he was defending Elena. Without another word I took my cart and walked away. I had made my way over to the ice cream figuring I was in need of chocolate fudge ice cream and then I was ready to go when I turned to see Damon yet again.

"I'm not defending her." he says knowing that his words had come out wrong. He had seen it in her green eyes she had been let down by him yet again, and he wondered why she wasn't ready to be his friend.

I placed my ice cream in the cart and glared his way. "That is exactly what you're doing, so do us both a favor and go chase after her and leave me alone."

"No" he says grabbing her arm. "I understand her- she has to blame someone else because if she looks in the mirror and owns up to her mistakes it might break her." he grips her arm tighter when she tries to move. "What she said, wasn't true. People love you." he says his voice softening. "Why do you think so many people are upset with Elena...with me? They love you." he says loosening his grip on her.

I swallow hard. " Let me go." I say my voice serious. "Damon let me go." I say again, noticing that the nosey clerk is looking our way with her mouth hanging open. Her gum drops to the floor and realize just how public we really are.

"I love you." he says softly. "And no one can take that away from you, not the people who never thought we'd make it, not your boyfriend and certainly not Elena." he says before disappearing.

I let out a sigh. This was why I hated shopping. Epic fail.

**BB-BB-BB**-**BB-BB-BB-BB-BB**

I had been home for about three hours before Caroline and Katherine had shown up both bringing a bottle of alcohol which was greatly appreciated. After a run in with Elena I was ready to either pound the hell out of her or let loose and since I had resisted the urge to slap her I was settling for letting loose with loud music and lots of booze.

One hour later

After passing around the bottle a couple of times I'm starting to feel a good buzz and decide that now is the time to introduce Katherine to a real slumber party that doesn't consist of her sitting opposite of me and Caroline, while Caroline is busy sexting Tyler.

"Seriously Caroline." I burst after hearing her cell phone signal yet another text message. "I thought we banned all of cell phone usage during slumber parties."

Caroline looks up at me blinking before breaking out into a grin. "Oh that..well that was before when you were seeing the King of jackasses and he would text you all night as if I was going to kidnap you or something." she says in one breath.

I roll my eyes. If their was one thing I could always count on was the adamant hatred that Caroline had for Damon, in an ever changing world that would always be the same and it had only gotten worst. "Come on C! If me and Katherine aren't talking to Mason and Stefan," I say getting a nod from Katherine. "You can stop sexting Tyler."

Katherine perks up suddenly and stops waving her wet fingernails. "Stefan likes when I send him naughty texts of course he knows that I'm down for every single thing I write and I'm very thorough." She says hopping off of her chair and sitting between me and Caroline. "You know for someone who has this cool and calm exterior, he really lets loose in the bedroom. "She says suddenly grinning. "And you know how I get him ruled up is a few words." she says beaming.

I watch as Caroline puts her cell down. Sex and shopping are her two favorite topics. Katharine soon reaches for the cell phone and types something to Tyler claiming that Caroline will thank her later, and to my surprise when she tosses the phone back to Caroline, she reads the message and gets this perverted grin that I've seen too many times on her face.

"You know, Tyler is everything you'd think he'd be in bed." Caroline nearly gushes causing me to recall just a bit I had slept with Tyler once upon time and although I was all for Caroline and Tyler becoming something other then fwb the thought of them doing it was too much for me. "He's always ready to go and I don't if its because I'm that good or if it's a wolf thing." Caroline continues causing me to actually nod my head, she had a point there. I had never been with a guy who wasn't supernatural so I too didn't know the difference between...stuff.

Almost instinctively me and Caroline incline our heads in the direction of Katherine who has a bottle of jack in her hand. "Definitely a wolf thing." Katherine says out loud. "But then again every guy is rearing to go with me...especially Stefan and Damon"

Despite her confession I can't help but laugh. "Weren't you around when vampires and wolfs were like sworn enemies?" I ask causing Katherine to shrug her shoulders.

"Yeah and your point?" Katherine asks looking between me and Caroline. "I didn't follow the rules back then and I certainly wont follow them now." she said in that Katherine way that made you shake your head at her and then envy her honesty at the same time.

Across the room Caroline couldn't hold it any longer and soon fake coughed "slut" cough,cough. Bright eyes turned before resting at me and I knew the questions would start. "Bon your awful quiet for someone who is doing Mason Lockwood on a regular basis." Caroline says cheekily.

I send a playful glare her way. Unlike Caroline who liked to broadcast every aspect of her relationship with just about anyone I liked to keep my private life really private. But since this was a slumber party it was a night of confessions. "What makes you think I've slept with Mason?" I ask popping an oreo in my mouth.

"Because we aren't stupid!" Caroline says snatching the bag of oreos out of my grasp.

Katherine gives Caroline the nod and I swear the two have just formed some kind of tag team alliance against me. "And we all know you've been with a vampire, so what's your preference?" she asked as if we were talking about what outfit to wear for the day or better yet the decision to wear wedges or stilettoes, instead of men.

I know I had planned this night so that Katharine could feel more at home with us but she was had delved further into things then I had ever thought. I looked to Caroline for a way out but she had looked more interested with each second that past. She was such a traitor.

"Come on Bon, the only guys you've been with are supernatural guys." Caroline says holding up her fingers. "Tyler before his wolf gene kicked in, he who shall not be named and Mason." she says pausing. "We just want to know who rates better from a witch perspective because let me tell you I'm a vampire and the rush I feel with Tyler is so freaking hot!"

My mouth hung agape as Katherine pushed my chin up claiming that it was unattractive to leave my mouth hanging open.

Katherine let out a sigh. It appeared she had to pull her rank as an HBIC and confess first. "Well kiddies listen up, I've been with my fair share of men, supernatural and whatnot and I have to say that for me, it's Stefan." she says dreamily. "Even when he was human it was always him and when he became a vampire it made everything that much better." She says a ghost of a smile on her lips. "The sound of his voice has the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, the touch of his hands have me breaking down and his lips..."

I shudder. "Lalalalalalalala"

Caroline held her hand up while I covered my ears. "Ok, gross I choose to believe that Stefan doesn't have a sexual bone in his body. " Caroline says with a shudder. "He's like a father figure and that is just gross."

Katherine smirks. "He's got a bone with my name on it." she says with a sly grin. "Now Bonnie it's your turn."

I look between the two who were like sex talking kindred spirit's. "I'm not doing this, first my sex life is private." I had mind enough to mention that my relationship with Mason was just as private. I felt like whenever you gushed about someone too much shit hit the fan an then skeletons came out of the closet. Not that I believed Mason had any deep dark skeletons.

Caroline chuckled. "Except for when he who shall not be named decided to record an encounter and lost the dvd." she says biting back a chuckle, because only Bonnie would have some sex tape running around lost in the Salvatore archives somewhere.

Katherine perked up. "Is it still missing because I'd love to see it." she says a wicked grin on her lips.

I chose to ignore her. "And secondly, we've all been with the same guy." I say looking between the two. Or guys in our case." I say looking at Caroline. And then it hit's us as everyone grimaces, before Katherine makes a comment about having him first. Caroline soon jumps in saying that she was compelled and would like to forget that chapter in her life. And then both girls are looking my way and I finally concede. "It's different." I say offering nothing more or less.

Silence

"So who's up for a movie?" Caroline asks breaking the silence.

To our surprise Katherine is the first off of the couch and fishes through my collection before holding "_The_ _Notebook_". Despite the initial shock, Caroline and I were eager to introduce Katherine to emotion since she had severely lacked in that department unless it was pertaining to Stefan. Caroline and I were of course ready with tissue boxes from the moment the movie began to play while Katherine just watched quietly and almost peacefully. It appeared that the notebook had effected possibly every girl who dared to watch it.

**BB-KP-CF**

Caroline had been the first to fall asleep leaving me and Katherine to bask in an emotional glory of crying amongst other girls all for the sake of love. We found ourselves on the porch where a nice breeze is blowing. The night had been much more fun then I had thought it would be. Katherine was funny and when she wasn't being a bitch she was actually cool to talk to. I hadn't thought she and Caroline would get along well, but Caroline didn't seem to have a problem with her, especially since she was finally getting laid. I swear the world could end and she'd be all smiles simply because Tyler was laying the pipe on her real good.

"This was...fun." Katherine says before snagging the bottle of Jim Bean that sat between us and took a healthy swig of it.

"I'm glad you liked it, I had fun to." I say as she passes the bottle my way.

Katherine looks in the direction of the green eyed girl. "Your not gonna tell Stefan I wanted to watch The Notebook are you? Because if you do it'll ruin my reputation."

I furrowed my brows. "What reputation, your known as an evil heinous bitch?"I say causing her to giggle my way.

Katherine shakes her head a smile on her lips as she brings her eyes up to the stars. In the distance she can hear the sound of a crow and for a moment wonders if Damon is spying on the witch. It wouldn't surprise her, especially since he had come to the conclusion that Elena had been poisonous to his relationship with Bonnie. "No bitch, I'm a HBIC!" she says with a wink.

I lick my dry lips. "If that's what you are then I'm a HWIC" I say before giggling because well the alcohol was starting to set in and when it did I tended to get the giggles or really touchy feely.

Katherine raises her brows. "Maybe I should get you drunk more often, that broom is no longer in your ass after a couple of drinks." she says pausing. "Can I ask you a question?" Katherine asked suddenly turning my way. I looked over at her and shrugged my shoulders I had nothing to hide.

"If I told you no would you ignore me?" I asked and she smirked my way. "Go ahead ask me anything." I say with ease.

"Honestly, why did you invite me here, to your house. We aren't exactly friends?" She asked while inspecting her black nail courtesy of Caroline, who apparently thought she looked like a girl who could rock black and pink nails. She had to admit, they didn't look to bad.

I pursed my lips together. Really when I thought of having a girls night, I had done it because Caroline had been ten times pissed at finding out everything involving me, Elena and Damon I had originally just wanted to let my friend know that I was okay and that she didn't have to be mad for me. And then as time went on I thought, why not invite Katherine over, especially since she meant so much to Stefan.

I picked up the bottle that sat between us and took a swig letting the liquid warm me up, before turning my attention back to Katherine who was waiting patiently. "You make my best friend happy." I say smiling at the mere thought of my best friend. "And since your important to Stefan, your important to me." I say simply and it was the truth. If Stefan could trust Katherine and could have another shot then I could do the same.

Katherine blinks twice, and opens her mouth only to shut it once again. Never had she met anyone like Bonnie Bennett. Whenever Stefan had spoken about Bonnie when he wasn't being perverted she got the idea he felt like Bonnie hung the moon and the stars and now she knew why. "He loves you-you know. He's so protective of you, you're a lucky girl to have Stefan as your friend. Every girl needs a friend like Stefan." Katherine says quietly.

My eyes drift close for a moment. "Well your lucky enough to have Stefan." I say opening my eyes. "And unlike the last bitch with your face, I hope you can treat him right."

Katherine snorts. "Trust me, I know who I want." she says snatching the bottle out of the witches. "Look at us having yet another girlfriend moment, who knows we might even become real friends."

I don't know how long we've been out here but I know it's nice and the alcohol is making me feel a bit warm and fuzzy instead of chilly as the October wind hit's my skin. I lean forward surprisingly Katherine by my actions, as I reach out to touch her chilly hand. "For what it's worth. I don't think you're a heinous bitch anymore." I say as if it's some sort of secret. I feel my lips hitch up in a smirk. "And if you ever need a friend-I'm here." I say with a yawn.

Before I know it we've climbed the stairs and find Caroline scooted over to one side of my bed I roll my eyes and hop in followed by Katherine who is somewhat timid for someone who has been telling everyone she likes me. We lye in bed silently for a few seconds before Katherine brings her phone out.

I look her way questioning when she smirks my way. "Just a little something for Stefan." she says snapping a picture of the two of us in bed. I roll my eyes before yawning yet again and snuggle further into bed as darkness sweeps over me.

"Good night Bonnie." Katherine says causing me to open my eyes and look her way sleepily.

"Good night Kat." I say closing my eyes once more but not before hearing the sound of a crow in the distance.

**A.N.2**: I hope you liked the chapter. i wanted this chapter to be the fallout from the chapter before with Elena reacting to everything as well as showing the contrast between her and Bonnie, and Elena and Damon as well. While i was writing the bamon section of this chapter, i had the song light years away by Mozella stuck in my head and it fit for them. Drop me a line and tell me what you think! For those reading Behind those hazel eyes, an update is coming really soon so be on the look out.


	14. Chapter 13

**A.N. Happy new year! I hope everyone had a safe holiday! thanks to all those that have been reading this story you guys are the best! This chapter features Bonnie's father whose name went through a change, I changed his name to Grayson De Pres. I envisioned her parents to be played by Paula Patton and Julian Mcmahon! This chapter is jam packed with lots of stuff and long so enjoy!**

special thanks to: ladyjaxs999, guest, aprilf00l, jewelsstars, and randomlittleme

xoxo

queena

* * *

><p><em>"Beautiful people like you, get whatever they want<em>" cher llyod

**Chapter 13: Dreams be Dreams**

_The sky is like a kaleidoscope of hues of blue as I navigate my way through this dream world. Everything is so vivid from the green of the grass that is so bright and vibrant that it reminds me of the color of a lime. To the pavement on the ground which shimmers with a hint of gold as if it was dusted with the hint of gold flecks. Everything seems so much brighter here, and it's a stark contrast to the nightmares that I had been suffering from that were plagued with so much darkness that it's nice to see for once that this dream might prove to be better then the rest._

_Looking down I realize that I'm not in my normal pajama clothes and instead I'm dressed in a Grecian like gown that was black and gold while my feet were bare. My hair was in ringlets that flowed past my shoulders, while my feet are bare._

_I look around and notice that this place looks vaguely familiar yet I can't seem to place it in my memory the setting is beautiful and calming yet I know it's too good to be true. My eyes narrow as I take the scene that is off in a distance. Lanterns lit up the court yard while candles decorated the narrow path that led the way to what, I could assume Damon was trying to communicate with me, and since I had been swiftly avoiding him since the brief moment we shared at the grocery store. For me it was easier to just stay away from Damon, but he- he was a persistent fuck who I knew had been following me, despite the fact that I had asked him ages ago to stop. _

_With trained eyes I looked around to see if I could find him. I knew he was here, Damon had a way of sneaking up on you when you had your guard down, so I needed to be ready for him. I already knew he was following me, so many people had told me so. Caroline had been the first, though at the time I thought she was exaggerating because nobody hated Damon as much as Caroline. Stefan had later confirmed that Caroline suspicions were correct and shared his theory of how his brothers mind had worked. Stefan had claimed that Damon was in the beginning stages of his latest obsession which was me. He had also went on to say that because Damon now realized he loved me that his brother would go to any lengths to get me back, which meant I had to be on my toes. As much as I loved Stefan I didn't think it was as bad as he made it seem. And then their was my boyfriend that had pointed out that wherever we were Damon followed, drink in hand waiting for the perfect moment to try and prove his love for me, to prove himself worthy of me. That was when I realized that they were all right and I had been too busy thinking about other things to realize what situation I had found myself in._

"_Damon!" I call while walking through the brightly lit courtyard. With each move I make, I notice the candles that are lighting up the sky and the pathway below are flickering as if they are mimicking my every move. _

"_Damon this goes way beyond stalking!" I say to the air, as the silence lingers._

_He had done this before, come into my dreams. It was after we had broken up, after I had broken up with him and he had come back to tell me he was going to get me back. That first dream he broke into he had taken me to the beach and I had hated every minute of it, because know one deserved to be mind fucked especially by someone who claimed to love them and continuously hurt them. This time however, I was sure Damon was doing this because we had shared a brief moment together, where I let down my walls and he had wanted that again...he wanted us again. He admitted it to me, so many times._

_When I finally reach the middle of the courtyard, I notice a fancy dinner is set up for two. I see a card that has my name on it and despite everything, I pluck it from the lilies that lye on the table. _

"_When you're ready, I'll be here."_

_After reading the note I crumbled the paper in my hand. I had been suffering from nightmares for weeks now and the one time I was finally having a rather pleasant dream, or at least it seemed pleasant enough, certainly better then the dreams of my mother, my father and lets not forget the man that I thought was stalking me through my dreams. Damon had come in tried to control everything which was typical Damon. It didn't matter if he was trying to be nice, this wasn't needed, just like him following me around town wasn't needed._

"_Damon, stop playing games with me, I know you're here so show yourself." I ground out while tapping my foot. _

_In the distance I watched as an approaching figure came near me. For a moment I tapped my foot waiting for Damon to finally show his face. As time ticks and he gets closer my heart beats faster. Soon the figure is close enough, and it's then that time slows down, because I realize, that the man in my dream, isn't Damon at all, its someone else and that's when the panic sets in. Almost immediately fear creeps up my body, I needed to wake up because this something was very wrong. Immediately I pinched my skin hoping to jolt awake and still find myself trapped in this dream. And that's when I decided to run._

_My heart is beating loud as I run in what seems like circles. I pray that I don't fall like some damsel would do, in this situation. My mind is racing and soon find myself questioning if my father is behind this dream, if he is torturing me like he did my mother? I shake my head dismissing the thought, my father would never hurt me and I just needed to stay away from whomever was chasing me in my dreams till something happened that caused me to wake up._

"_I wish you no harm." Elijah calls while following the young girl who had reminded him of his beloved. He would never hurt Bonnie, simply because she meant the world to her mother and whatever Alexandria had loved, he loved just as much!_

_I ignore the man who continues to speak and soon remove my shoes that are way too loud. I hold the hem of my long dress and soon see a clearing and run as if my life depended on it. Luckily for me I happen to run on a daily basis so I don't tire out as quickly. I keep running and find myself at the same spot yet again, as the man continues to speak. It's the same man that I've been hearing in my dreams for weeks now and if I weren't so freaked out I would stop to see what he wanted._

" _I wish you wouldn't run away from me. I wish you no harm."_

_Once again I find myself ignoring the mystery mans words and make a mad dash in the opposite direction his voice is coming from. The scene around me is changing and now instead of seeing the courtyard lit up with lanterns I now find myself running in the direction of a big white house that is so familiar that it makes me halt my movements. I had seen this house before, I wasn't sure if it were a picture or a memory that had belonged to my mother. The last couple of weeks had been rather jumbled. But this place, this house, the big white house with the red door, it looks so familiar._

_The wind soon picks up and I don't have to turn around to know that the mystery man is behind me. I swallow hard before turning around to see a beautiful man dressed in a black suit. My breath catches in my throat because this man standing before me, I had seen him before._

"_You." I say with a gasp as I look him in the eye._

"_Hello Bonnie." Elijah says his hands reaching out to kiss her hand. He can tell by the look on her face that the petite beauty is not only confused but a bit scared as well and he does his best to calm her nerves by running his fingers along her wrist. It was something that had always seemed to calm Alexandria down whenever she was upset, and it seemed to be working, because her heartbeat was beginning to steady._

"_As I said, I wish you no harm." He says when suddenly a nearby tree branch falls causing him to turn in the direction just as Bonnie began to go the opposite direction, only he was faster and soon stood in front of her, a smile on his lips. "You're just like her."_

_I stare forward at the man in front of me. He had sure done a lot to bring me here, to creep into my dreams and now I wanted to know why. "Listen I don't know who you are, or what you want from me, but I don't take too kindly to being stalked in my dreams."_

_Despite the fact that the young lady in front of him is quite angry he cannot do anything but smile at her. Bonnie was every bit her mothers daughter; so full of fire and fight it was one of the attributes that had caused him to fall for the elder Bennett. _

_Bowing his head, his speaks. "I apologize for frightening you." he says placing both hands in his pockets. "I wish you know harm Bonnie." he says pausing as he meets her eyes. "I'm here to help you."_

_I suck my teeth. Despite the fact that I had been running from the very man that is standing in front of me, something told me to trust him, but that was weird because I didnt even know him. "Who are you and what do you want with me?" I ask causing his head to fall forward as he chuckles yet again._

_He brings his brown eyes to look at her, Bonnie was so young, so beautiful and so full of fire it was wonder that she found herself between a werewolf and a vampire much like her mother had found herself between a warlock and a vampire. Their was something about the Bennett women that you couldn't deny even if you wanted to. "My name is Elijah, Elijah Mikaelson." he says looking over at her. "And I'm here, to help you save the woman I love...your mother."_

_My eyes go wide. My mother had mention a man by the name of Elijah many times in her diary. From what I gathered he was the love of her life. In fact I was now positive that this was the very man I had seen my mother leave with all those years ago. "You- your Elijah." I say taking a dramatic step back._

_He nods his head. "We don't have much time, but if you want answers, you'll know where to find me."_

Before I get a chance to ask him another question, the distant sound of my cell phone causes me to jolt awake.

I awake with a gasp and find my cell phone sitting on the night stand next to the bed. Retrieving the device I notice a text message from Katherine that has a dirty joke. That girl had the best and worst timing ever. I had wanted to wake up from that dream for so long and after meeting the Elijah my mother had written about, the same Elijah that was an original vampire, I knew the only person that could possibly help me, would be someone mainly a vampire who was old as hell and Katherine fit the bill.

Of course that would have to wait because I needed to find my boyfriend.

**ML-ML-ML**

**Mason**

Mason Lockwood paced back and forth after while going over the information he had just retrieved from one of his pals Scott who had informed the alpha that two of their pack members had gone missing. Inside of his office were Jules who was usual in the forefront of things because the pack members just happen to be her brother Sam and her boyfriend Brady. And his second in command Jase. Together the three of them had been trying figure out what had happen that caused Sam and Brady to go off the map. From what he had gathered the guys were supposed to go on a trip and meet up with some fellow pack members that were in Florida. However they hadn't met each other at the check point.

He met eyes with Jase who nodded his head as if silently knowing what he was thinking. It had only been a few hours since the guys had missed their check point and many things could've happen that caused a mix up. But they had both known Jules, she was a hot head and always suspected foul play. In fact he was sure Jules would blame everything on vampires and witches and want to strike back at whomever she deemed the reason her boyfriend and brother had not made it to the check point.

"What are you guys waiting for, we have to find them!" Jules says bolting for the door but stopping once Jase stands in her way and places his hands on her shoulders.

"Jase" Jules says before letting out huff. She knew she wouldn't get anywhere with him, especially sine he backed everything Mason had said, he was after all his right hand man.

Jase lets out a long sigh and rubs his face. "Jules we have to figure this out together." he says motioning for her to sit back down, and when she does he crosses his arms over his chest while Mason speaks.

The alpha males watches as both his friends look his way expectantly. Since becoming wolf pack leader he's had little to no threats. Most of the vampires in Mystic Falls had tended to stay away and the pack had done the same. It wasn't until recently that the two groups had begin to mingle together, and really it had been he, Jase and Stefan who were doing the mingling. Some of the other wolfs weren't as comfortable mingling with those who could cause a threat and he couldnt fault them for that. This however was the first time real trouble had seemed to knock on the door and instead of being worried he was sure everything was fine.

"Scott and Styles are to be in contact with us in case the have a run in with the guys. Until then, I need you to calm down, we don't know what has happen and it might not be as bad as you're thinking." he says reaching out to touch her hand only for Jules to snatch it away.

Jules glares at her longtime friend and the alpha of the pack. She loved Mason to death but right now she wanted him to go and find her brother and her boyfriend. "You want me to calm down, when my brother and boyfriend are missing not gonna happen!" she says on her feet again. "You need to find them Mason, you're the leader, you need to do something." she says while running her hands through her hair.

He stands and soon walks over to her and brings her into his arms. Jules may have pretended to be this hard ass girl but deep down she was still the vulnerable girl he had met all those years ago.

"I knew something like this was going to happen." Jules mumbles out while backing away from Mason and standing closer to Jase. "For all we know this has everything to do with the fact that our alpha is dating a witch that once belonged to a vampire." she spits out while looking at Mason.

A tick under his jaw begins to form at the mere mention of Bonnie. He had told Jules many times that she needed to get over being threaten by his relationship with Bonnie because wether she liked it or not, Bonnie was here to stay. "I'm going to ignore that because I know you're freaking out over this." he says looking I the direction of his long time friend. "We'll find them." he says with a pause. "Knowing Sam he just wanted to check something out and Brady always forgets to charge his phone."

She licks her dry lips. "And what if this has to do with your witch, about your new friend Stefan Salvatore, about your ties to..." she stopped upon the look on his face. Everyone knew the deal never mention Katherine, ever.

He slammed his hand on the table. "If we don't hear anything from them in forty-eight hours, then I'll personally go down and look for them through every nook and cranny." he ground out his voice giving off an edge that would've told anyone else to back down but not Jules.

Once again Jules looked at him as if she were trying to read him. "Are you sure about that Mason, do you think you can leave your witch long enough to think about something ...someone that isn't her?" Jules says taking a step closer. "You're so busy getting caught up in witch pussy that your forgetting about _who you are_, and _what you are_." she pleads her blue eyes flashing with a hint of yellow.

Suddenly a growl is heard and she knows that she's angered Mason but before he has the chance to say anything Jase is standing between the two of them like the loyal friend he was.

"Enough!" the sandy blond nearly yelled as he looked between his two friends. "Jules, you need to calm down and let Mason handle this the way he see's fit." he says causing the blond girl to open her mouth before shutting it at the look on his face.

Turning to Mason he spoke. "And you need to prepare for what's to come if this does have anything to do with any vampire in this town." he says before motioning for Jules to leave with him.

Mason watches the two get to the door and at the last minute Jules runs to him and gives him a hug before leaving with Jase.

When he's sure that they are indeed gone he sits back in his chair. Jules was right, if indeed he needed to plan a search party for members of his pack, he couldn't be distracted by anything which meant he needed to make sure that someone was protecting Bonnie. Not that she was a damsel in distress because she wasn't, he just needed someone who could keep an eye on her and the only person he could think of was Stefan Salvatore.

Swivelling in his chair he let out a breath, he had a duty to his pack to look out for their best interest, and he would, he just wanted to make sure Bonnie was okay was well. Suddenly he looks up to spot Bonnie standing before him in her pink robe a look of understanding on her face.

"Bon, I didn't know you were awake." he says trying to look calm but failing because when she looked at him, she looked like she knew what had happen. "How much did you hear?' he asked knowingly as she came to sit on the desk.

"Enough." I say reaching for his hands. "Are you okay, do you need to leave because if you do, I'm okay here." I say pausing. The one thing I didn't want to do was hold Mason back and if he needed to go and take care of business I would support him because he had always been supported of me.

He brought her close to him. "I'm better now that you're here" he said causing her to smile because she had told him the exact same thing in this spot.

As Mason holds me in his arms I cant help but smile. He was so strong, but like everyone he broke too and despite my feelings for Jules, I knew she was important to him. "Jules, is just scared, you're a good pack leader, it's the reason you're the alpha male." I say turning say smiling down at him. "Now come on, I'll make you breakfast." I say when he gets to his feet,

He quirks a grin. "You're gonna cook for me?" he asked looking into the dazzling green orbs.

"Yep" I say with a nod. "And you Mason Lockwood are going to love it.

**BB-AB**

Grayson Du Pres sat in a high rise hotel room overlooking the Pacific ocean a glass in whine in one hand while he spins his wedding ring on the desk table. Today marked yet another anniversary to the wonder that was known as Alexandria Bennett. She had meant the world to him, she was the reason he had Bonnie, which was the only light he had left in his life.

He thought of her often whenever he stepped foot onto the beach he thought of the way she had loved the water. The image of her had floated to his mind if he had encountered someone her age, or whenever he passed a ballet studio. Those were things that had reminded Grayson Du Pres of the daughter that he had essentially abandon, _Bonnie_. It wasn't his fault though. He had a job that had taken him all over the world and when he wasn't working he had an obligation that was far a beyond that of what his daughter would ever know. He had given himself to dark magic years ago and to sustain the kind of power he had tapped into sacrifices had to be made. He had to continue to do away with the vampires and werewolves and with each heart he collected he inherited some of the power of that species. It took a lot to be on top..it took a lot to be powerful and he had promised himself the moment he had been paralyzed with fear as he watched the hybrid of vampire/ werewolf abomination kill his mother that he would never be powerless again.

He knew that many people in the small town would call him an unfit parent, so that he was ignoring his daughter and that the detrition of his relationship with Bonnie was all his fault. They however were all wrong, the blame rest on that of her mother...and his wife. If only Alexandria had seen the light that he was had been trying to shine in her face for so long and finally give up her vampire forever. He was perfect for her, always had been. They were both witches and from backgrounds of prominent witch figures in the community- if only she could let go of this fantasy of being with that _vampire_. They were trouble and in the end it was her love for the vampire that had cost her everything.

Gazing at a photograph of his lovely wife, and beautiful daughter he closed his eyes briefly and let his mind wonder. They could've been happy together he, Alexandria and Bonnie, they could've been a family but _she_ wouldn't allow it. He had gone through great lengths to get her and now it seemed like everything was for nothing. He loved her, back when he was a teen and even now, he killed for her and she didn't love him.

In a rage he through the framed photograph at the wall. He had done so much and she didn't even know. For a moment he debated seeing his wife. He could dip into her subconscious and confess to all his sins to her, after all it was their anniversary and she deserved to know the truth. His words would drive her insane for sure. Because today was the day he was going to tell her that he was the reason her father had gotten sick, he had poisoned her father and then used dark magic, magic that was so strong that it had paralyzed old Alexander and when his mind was weakest he took advantage of it and in a sense compelled Alexander into begging his daughter on his death bed to marry someone he already considered family.

It was high time he reunite with his loving wife.

_Dream_

_He found her sitting by the pound she was dressed how he had wanted her which was in a wedding gown, while he was dressed in a tux. Today was their anniversary and for her on this day he had black roses._

"_Enjoying your time in solitude my love." he says sitting down next to Ally. His eyes travel over her café latte skin. As his hands itched to run themselves through her long flowing hair. His eyes stay trained on her even though she didn't dare look his way and despite of it all he found himself smiling. Alexandria Bennett had been the hardest girl to catch and once he had her, he had vowed to never let her go. What had attracted him to her all those years ago had been the light that had been behind her eyes. She was so determined and so fierce, yet here she was a scared shell of the woman she use to be._

_Reaching out he stroke her cheek causing her to immediately stand up and glare at him with those eyes that were so expressive. "Now, now Alexandria you don't want to get on my bad side, especially since I control everything here in this place." he says standing to his full height. and snapping his fingers so that it changed the scenery so that she was now back in Mystic Falls right before her father had died._

"_What do you want Grayson." She asked her voice on edge. She would rather spend the rest of her life alone then to have to deal with him ever again. But he had held all the cards as long as she was trapped in here. What he didn't know was that she was a lot smarter then he had given her credit for, and she had taken precautions to make sure that he would never be able to touch Bonnie. Elijah had made sure that Bonnie would always be protected, wether it be by s fellow vampires or the witches that were on his payroll._

"_I want to spend time with you." he says in a suave tone while gripping her waist almost harshly. "After all," he says fixing his blue/green eyes on her. "It is our anniversary." he says a devilish look on his features. "And your all alone...I thought it might be do us some good to spend it together...especially since it's our anniversary." _

_Alexandria pulled away from him and grimaced at the smile on his lips. He had once been someone she could talk to...someone she had cared about very deeply and most of all someone she had depended on but now he was just a monster that was holding her captive. Every moment that they shared together where she had thought was real had all been a lie. The only reason why Grayson had wanted her was for her power. She was a Bennett witch and he a Du Pres warlock, everyone thought it was meant to be but they were all wrong._

_Tilting her chin up and she looked in the eyes of her husband. "I would rather continue to rot here all alone in obscurity then to ever let you touch me." she spits out before slapping him hard across the face. When he did nothing but laugh almost darkly her way she felt her stomach lurch. If it weren't for Bonnie, and Elijah she would surly chose death then to ever have to deal with this man...this monster._

_He lets blue/green eyes roam her freely not afraid of a little roughness. This was what he had found so damn irresistible about Alexandria, Ally had never been afraid of anything. You could put her up against anyone and she would fight to the death, tooth and nail but the one thing that had truly frighten her was losing those that she had loved. And he had been the reason she had lost both her father and their daughter. "You should mind your tongue Ally, this is my world and I control it." he says deathly calm._

_Now it was her turn to grin. "You may control this world, but you'll never be able to control me! Alexandria says enraged. She had debated revealing that he would never control Bonnie as well, but that would only make him do so and that was the last thing she wanted. It was easier with him away from Bonnie because that meant she and her magic was still safe. _

_Looking up into her husbands eyes she shivered, because if Grayson had ever found out that she had contacted Bonnie and dared to turn her against him, she was afraid of what he would do, not to her because he could do anything and it wouldn't hurt her or phase her, but hurting Bonnie...that would kill her._

_He inclined his head to the side and regarded her with a look. She never knew how much he had loved her, all the ways he had loved her. Even now, he had still wanted her, it was this need that went way beyond anything he had ever experienced in his life. It didn't matter if she thought he was obsessed or if she didn't want him, what mattered was that his heart had wanted her and he'd have her._

"_Oh Ally." he says a whimsical look on his face. "The only thing I ever wanted was you- we could've had it all." he whispers as his pointer finger trails along her jaw. "I would've given you anything." he says as his grip gets tighter on her hip._

_He hold her close and begins to dance though there is no music. He holds her close almost crushing her body to his. "I would give you anything." he says softly._

_Once again she had looked his way her gaze unwavering as she stared into green/blue eyes. Sometimes she saw glimpses of the man that had been her best friend for so long and in those tiny moments she had wished that she had been more honest with him and herself. As bad as Grayson had turned out to be, she knew that they had once loved each other. "Except grant me my freedom." she says looking into his eyes. _

_She pulls back to look at him again. "Grayson, you say you'll do anything for me, that you came here because you love me, that you keep me here because you love me! Yet you leave me trapped here!" she practically yells. "I miss my daughter, everyday I'm away from her she forgets me and soon I'll be a distant memory." pause. "Don't you want what is best for Bonnie? She needs her mother." she nearly pleads._

_He say nothing._

"_Please, let me go, Grayson, let me go please." she says touching his face._

_For a second he gets caught up but then he remembers who she is and what she's capable of. "You almost had me," he say chuckling darkly. "Never again, you'll never reunite with Elijah." he says with a glare. "Or Bonnie for that matter."_

_Wild eyes looked his way, fury radiating off them."Do you get pleasure in this, in keeping me here and keeping my from my daughter!" she demanded._

_He face was dark instantly. How dare she placed the blame on him. She had broken his heart, time and time again and to pretend she did otherwise was ludicrous. And for that she would pay. He snapped his fingers changing the scenery instantly. "You want to make me out to be the bad guy Ally, I'll show you how bad I really am." he says his voice void of emotion._

_He snapped his fingers changing the scenery so fast that it almost gave him whip flash. "You hurt me, so now its your turn to hurt." he says darkly._

_And with that he walked her down memory lane where she had watched as he had stabbed her father with the poisonous needle. She had watched her ailing father had fought for control, as he struggled against the much younger warlock and finally succumbing to what was inevitable._

_When he brought her back to the present time, back to her own personal hell- he watched as she sobbed defeated and broken by the truth he had finally shown her. He grabbed her by the arm and hauled her up so that she could look into his eyes and planted a harsh kiss on her. When he was finished with her, he let go as she pushed at his chest violently, before sinking to the ground ._

"_Happy anniversary Alexandria Bennett." he says knelling to place a kiss to her temple, just as it began to rain. Ally was stronger when she was upset and her emotions were taking over the realm he had kept her in. _

_With one last look in her direction he snapped his fingers leaving her all alone they it should be._

_End of dream_

Returning to his office Grayson had once again found himself peering down at a picture or his daughter. Alexandria and her betrayal was the reason he could barely look at his little girl. The one thing that had scared him more then that hybrid all those years ago was the possibility that in a moment of rage he would dare to hurt Bonnie. Simply because Bonnie had reminded him so much of her mother. And the thought of her mother made him angry, so angry and he never wanted to be that angry with Bonnie, because she was innocent.

Letting out a sigh he walks the expanse of his office with a simple push of buttons his opens the wall displaying a hidden compartment which holds they key to everything. He holds the sacred key in his hand for a only a moment before opening the safe and pulling out a mirror. He had acquired the mirror while traveling overseas and found that it had great power. It was a rare artifact that he had wanted very desperately and after paying a hefty amount of money he had the sacred position.

He chuckled to himself, if only his family had known, what kind of power he had possessed. He had told his family that he had given up practicing magic ages ago but that had all been a lie. Though he had given up practicing good magic he had delved into the depth of dark magic since he was a teen. That kind of magic...that kind of power spoke to him more then the sissy magic his father was accustomed to. The thought of his father caused him to grimace. Christopher Du Pres was a man who was still very important in the witching world, but he had lost all respect for his father the moment he had married a werewolf. He hated his father almost as much as he hated Ally.

He would never let Bonnie be like them, like her grandfather or her mother for that matter. Bonnie was all he had left, and if she was ever caught up in anything like her mother...well lets just say he wasn't afraid to take matters into his own hands.

His hands shook with anger as the inner beast threaten to break free. He'd save Bonnie from that town, and those people before ever letting her follow in the footsteps of her mother.

Once again he looked at the mirror in his hands. It would show him all he needed to see...all he needed to know.

"_Mirror, mirror in my hand, show me where my daughter stands?_"

He looks into the mirror and as dark colors swirl around as if it were the depths of the of the ocean with the current leading the way. Soon he see's a reflection and at the sight of it, his eyes go wide. It's only now that he knows exactly what to do.

**DS-DS-DS**

**Damon**

Damon Salvatore let the thick tacky blood from the cinnamon spiced girl trickle down his throat enjoying the blood high he was currently taking part of . He had brought the girl home last night after another desperate and unsatisfying pub crawl. This had been a hell of a lot more fun when he had first came to Mystic Falls and he was the hot guy who was chasing after an illusion. Pub crawls had been more satisfying when Ric was still around and more importantly he had been a hell of a lot better at the art of seduction when he wasn't hung up on Bonnie. She was still on his brain, still in his veins, and very much tattooed on his dead heart and what was left of his soul.

It was almost ironic how wanting Bonnie, how owning up to loving Bonnie had changed everything for him. Even when he had been lusting after Katherine and then Elena he had still been able to preform...but with Bonnie it was like his dick had only sprung to life for one girl and she didn't want him.

And he was a man with many vices but some things he found he couldn't control even if he wanted to. That was why he had resulted to compelling his dinner and subsequent breakfast into thinking they had the night of her life and sent her on her merry way. Alone yet again, he flounces back into his bed but not before eyeing the picture Katherine had so graciously given him while taken at the slumber party. With blue eyes trained on the photo he lets his hands wander with his eyes drifting shut. As her name fell from his lips.

**BB-ML-BB**

"I told you, you'd like it." I say plating my own breakfast as well. I wasn't much of a cook but I was learning with Mason. I had cooked scrambled eggs and toasted a few bagels for the two of us.

"To be honest I like everything about you." he says placing a kiss to her neck, espeically this tiny robe your wearing." he says with a wink.

I push at his chest. "Down boy!" I say jumping when the door bell rings. I give Mason a look and he shrugs his shoulders.

I shook my head and began to eat my breakfast but stopped once Mason walked in with Stefan in tow. Immediately I got to my feet and lept in my best friends arms.

"Good morning to you to B." Stefan says placing a kiss to my nose.

Stepping out of the embrace I looked at Stefan and Mason who looked like they wanted to spend boy time together. "What are you doing here? I thought for sure Katherine would have you chained the bed with vervain on your wrist and ankles." I say with a smirk.

Stefan shakes his head and sits on the counter. Since the first time he and Mason had gone out on their man date, the two of them were quickly becoming real friends.

"Your so kinky in the morning B!" Stefan says taking a bagel off of her plate. "I can do whatever I want whenever I want." he says nodding in the direction of Mason. "Can't a guy go see his best male bud without the third degree?"

I looked from Mason to Stefan back to Mason. "What are you two up to?"

Mason looked my way blue/green eyes shining. "Nothing, Stefan and I were just gonna box." he said flashing me a smile. "That is if its okay with you to share you best friend an all?"

I roll my eyes. I had been around Mason and Stefan long enough to know that something was going on, that they didn't want me to know about, and although a big part of me wanted to call them out for trying to keep something from me, something told me that this might be really important and that they might be keeping something from me, for me.

I grin his way and walk towards him. "Of course I'm willing to share." I say leaning on my tip toes and place a kiss to his lips.

The sound of fake barfing causes me to pull away from Mason where Stefan is pretending to barf all over the place.

"Get a room while ya!" Stefan says those his vibrant eyes are dancing.

I walk his way and flick his nose. "Your one to talk." I say and he shrugs his shoulders.

Soon I make my way out of the kitchen but not before telling the boys to behave and be carful. Since they were off doing manly things, I knew this was my chance to get Katherine alone so that she could help me with Elijah Mikaelson.

**EG-EG-EG**

**Elena**

After debating wether or not to take the plunge, Elena Gilbert had walked into the one place that was her home away from home, almost timidly. She had seen Stefan leave the peel off the property like a bat out of hell and even when his headlights were a memory she still felt like she had been on pins and needles. She had always been the type of girl who was comfortable in her own skin but the moment the news spread about her indiscretion with Damon it was like she couldn't find her footing. Her friends were no longer her friends and it seemed like everyone had turned against her. Her own brother had looked at her different, though he still loved her because they were family, he often looked at her like he hadn't known her at all. And knowing that she had disappointed Jeremy had nearly driven her mad...it was driving her mad. She hated knowing that Bonnie and Stefan were off living this happy life while she was miserable every minute of every day.

She tilted her head back with the confidence that only came with her now curly hair as she made her way up the wide staircase. Among reaching her destination she stopped and suddenly took a detour to his room. Pushing open the door she looked over the bedroom that hadn't changed. A small smile crept to her lips. Her eyes darted across the room noticing that a journal rested upon the desk. Books that had been read millions of times were still cluttered along the bookshelves. A ray of candles were also in the window seal that had been burned many times. Almost slowly she walked about his room fingering his the knick knacks that rest on his dresser. God she missed him and so much that was why she was acting so crazy...so unhinged. When she was with Stefan she felt like she was sane and without him she was falling to pieces.

Tip toeing to the dresser she noted his cologne and lifted it up to her nose inhaling the scent that was so Stefan. She didn't think she'd ever miss anyone the way she missed him and what made things worst was that he was still here. It was different from missing someone who had moved away because she had seen Stefan everyday and everyday she had missed him more because he was close enough to touch yet so far away. Her eyes traveled further and it was then that she saw it. Narrowing brown eyes she picked up the sole picture that was placed on the dresser. Her chest burned as she held the photograph. It was a picture of Bonnie, and...and Katherine. Their had been several photos of the two people who were slowly but surly taking over her life. She curled her hands in to fist as she looked at one last photo, that Grabbing a copy she marched clear cross the mansion in search of Damon.

**DS-DS-DS**

**Damon**

Damon Salvatore stepped out of the shower and white towel hanging loose along his hips. The shower had helped the mounting stress that was starting to mount around him. It was bad enough that Bonnie was constantly on his mind, but hearing that his brother was going out on yet another excursion with Mason Lockwood had only served to ruin his mood and thus stop any fantasy that had involved Bonnie and his happy place. It appeared that the "man date" Bonnie had set his brother and natural enemy on had been a good one because for the last two weeks he had the pleasure of seeing his brother hang out with the wolf at the Grill as if it were his home away from home. And what peeved him the most was that they were now sitting at his favorite spot, the spot he had often occupied with Ric. It was such a bitch ass move and he was sure that Stefan had done this on purpose. He was taunting him, telling him he was no longer needed not by his own brother and definitely not by his ex girlfriend. The same girlfriend he had found himself stalking an awful lot lately.

He could still remember the night of the slumber party, the night he had rested in the shadows high above in a tree while listening as Bonnie and Katherine had shared a private moment, a moment that involved talking about him.

_Flashback_

_Sitting on top of the roof he listened carefully as Bonnie and Katherine spoke about Stefan which was no surprise. What was a surprise was when they started talking about him. He was positive that Bonnie was near being drunk hence the reason for her loose lips and Katherine had always been rather nosy._

"_Did you love him?" Katherine asked her words sounding soft and nothing like Katherine at all._

_A loud sigh is heard and without looking he knows that Bonnie is gnawing on her bottom lip. " I did." she says pausing yet again. "I suppose I loved him as much as he loved you...as much as you love Stefan."_

_End of flashback_

He was brought out of his thoughts by the consistent chatter and turned to find that Elena was standing in his doorway a look of determination on her features. It was almost comical how once upon a time the mere sight of her had made butterflies creep into his stomach, how he thought he dead heart started beating all because of Elena Gilbert, and now he felt nothing while looking at her. He wondered if that was the way Stefan had felt about Elena, or if Bonnie had felt that way about him.

"How long do you plan on avoiding me?" she asked her hands on her hips. "Because this thing where you avoid and ignore me is getting old Damon." she huffed. "Whatever I did, I'm sorry." she says flatly. " So can we get over this and fix what is broken in our lives?"

He says nothing but continues to look at her like she's the scum of the earth because really what she had said to Bonnie all those nights ago had really made her very low in his opinion and he didn't think anyone could be any lower then himself. She had been nasty and ruthless and before he would've loved to see Bonnie Bennett knocked a few pegs down, he would've love to see bad girl Elena, but now he was just tired of her. And the words she had dared to say to Bonnie, those words were things he'd never forget.

"As long as it takes." he says not offering her any more or any less. In his opinion Elena had been slowly going out of her mind, she was spinning out of control since Stefan had left her and though he could sympathize with her on some level because the things she had dared to say to Bonnie, not just about her parents, but about the way he had felt, that was something he could never forget and probably not even forgive if he was being honest.

She bit her lip. "Listen I know your mad, and your growing tired of my mood swings, but I'm going through a lot right now and its just been hard to get a handle on my emotions." she says looking at him with wide eyes.

He snorts. "Your gonna have to do better then that." he says as brown eyes go wide. Elena had been on a rampage blaming everyone for own downfall when really they were to blame for what had happen. Elena had given him false hope and he had been too caught up in the past to realize he was ruining his future. But that wasn't the reason he was done with her, it had been her treatment of Bonnie that had set him off. He could take Elena yelling at him, blaming him for shit but the moment she had dared to turn against Bonnie and make her question his feelings for her, when that had been a sore subject was the last straw. He loved Bonnie, and Elena of all people had some nerve to question it.

"I...I'm sorry okay. You're my friend Damon, and I'm apologizing for being difficult." She says slowly.

He regards her with steely eyes. "That isnt gonna cut anymore, especially after what you said to Bonnie." he glares. "I can take your mood swings, the crying whatever but for you to dare lash out at her is something I wont stand for." he said his voice dripping with hidden threats.

He could forgive Elena for lots of shit, for stringing him and his brother along, for telling him time and time again that it would always be Stefan. But what he could not forgive was her talking about his relationship with Bonnie as if it were something that joke about. He knew part of it had been his fault, he put Elena first before everything, before his brother and before his girlfriend and Elena thought she could talk shit about the latter, which was not cool.

Big brown eyes blinked rapidly. She had been under the impression that Damon had been upset with her and her constant mood swings, the fact that she was always blaming him for something or crying to him the next minute, but it appeared that he was mad at her because of _Bonnie_?

Swallowing hard she speaks though it strained "You- your avoiding me because of Bonnie?" she questions unable to wrap her head around the notion. It seemed like everyone was on team Bonnie these days and Damon of all people was suppose to be on team Elena, because she was on team Damon. She wanted him to get what he wanted which apparently was Bonnie, she just didn't think he would turn his back on her to get it.

He lept to his feet and peered down at her with nothing but anger and disappointment, because Elena was suppose to be the good one in all of this but the more he looked at her the more he realized she was far from good. In fact he was beginning to wonder if she was ever as ethereal as he once thought, maybe he had built it all up in his mind "Damn straight!" he seethes. " I don't care how bad you feel your life is getting, never question my love for her! Never speak to her as if she isn't worth it!" he says eyes cold. "Because if you do, you'll lose the only friend you have." he says darkly.

He had been thinking about this thing for days and Elena showing up just made him explode with everything he had been thinking. If he could do it over again, and chose between Bonnie and Elena, he would've chosen Bonnie and for once stop being the reckless vampire that thought of nothing but his own wants and needs.

She licked her lips together before speaking. "I don't know who I am anymore." She says looking into his ice blue eyes. "Without them, I don't know who I am." she admits before pacing almost nervously. "Do you have any idea how hard it is for me, my friends wont talk to me and when they do its different. " she says pausing. "Matt wont look me in the eye and although he doesn't say I word I know he's wondering where the old Elena went before, " she drawled.

He rolled his crystal blue eyes. Elena needed to grow the hell up. Of course people were going to judge her especially since word had gotten around town but shit happen. This wasn't about her this was about Bonnie and the things she had dared to say to her yet Elena could only see her pain, feel her pain. "Are you trying to put the blame on me and Stefan?"

She shook her head. "No." she said with a huff. "My life is a mess, my brother looks at me like I'm a stranger, do you have any idea..." she stopped when she finally noticed the look on his face. For the first time in a long time she looked at him and not for superficial reasons either. She hadn't noticed earlier but Damon had looked so sad, sadder then she had ever seen and that was behind the anger.

He lifted his brows as if her words hadn't hurt, that she had forgotten that in the quest to get her panties he had lost as well. Elena wasn't he only one hurting. "Your preaching to the choir." he says bored and annoyed yet again. Why was she here in the first place because really since she had come into his home and dared to come into his bedroom the only thing she had talked about was herself. "The difference between you and me is that Jeremy will get over this, Stefan not so much." he says walking over to the bar in his bedroom and filling his glass to the brim. He hated talking about this, talking about Stefan or Bonnie for that matter, because he knew what he had lost and how far he'd have to go to get them back.

She bit her lip again. "Stefan, will forgive you." she says pausing. She didn't understand why everyone made this out to be so much worst then what it had been. "Its not like you too aren't used to this type of situation." she said nonchalantly and nearly jumped when he whipped his head around fast a glare in his eyes.

He shook his head. Elena would never understand it wasn't about being in the same situation as before it went far past that now. It was about Bonnie, it would always be about Bonnie for Stefan. The only thing that could bring he and his brother back together would be a miracle or Bonnie for that matter. "Not for hurting Bonnie." he says as she takes an intake of breath. "And he wont forgive you either, not after that stint you pulled attacking her in public."

Shifting from one foot to the other she speaks again. "I was upset," she admitted softly. "And maybe even a little bit jealous. Between Stefan freezing me out and the whole town looking at my like I'm some kind of viper, I just lashed out and since Bonnie has everything I wanted..." she trailed off. She couldn't lie everything that had came out of her mouth during her argument with Bonnie had been honest, at least in her eyes. She was being honest and sometimes honesty hurt.

He studied her closely. He was trying to figure out what had drawn him to Elena Gilbert, besides the fact that he wanted to have sex with her. I guess he could chalk it up to wanting Katherine and Elena had been the kinder gentle version of Katherine, but now he was just so fucking tired of her and he never thought he'd think that. "I doubt anyone will see it that way Elena." he says dryly.

Her eyes grow tight and she's suddenly annoyed by his flip attitude toward her. "I know that!" she screams and when he smirks in her face she is suddenly overcome with such anger. Everyone is blaming her for all of this, but Damon was their with her...he should've stopped her, he was suppose to be the adult, instead he let her crash and burn.

She crashed and burned and it was all his fault.

"Why didn't you stop me, we wouldn't be in this mess if you would've stopped me!" she rages turning on the only friend she had right now. She watched as he blinked her way an unreadable expression on his face.

He takes a step back as if she had slapped. He had wondered that same thing, of course he would never admit that to Elena. He wouldn't shoulder all the guilt of what had happen, because Bonnie had forgiven him, in her own way. The problem right now, was Elena and the fact that she thought that he would let her talk to Bonnie as if she was nothing more then another face in the crowd. "That night, started the downfall of everything princess, but you sealed your own fate, and _they love her too much to even give you another chance_." he says with a shrug.

He could take being hated, it was all he had ever known, but Elena she had been used to being love and adored and it was driving her insane. Hence the reason why she was standing before him throwing out accusations. He held his glass up in salute. "You fucked up yet again princess." he says looking at her. "Bonnie would've forgiven you eventually because in her mind it was bound to happen, but what you said to her those scars will never heal." he admits truthfully.

Defeated she speaks. "I know." she says pausing. "I keep making these mistakes but I'm gonna fix it." she says looking down at the ground because for some reason she can't look at Damon. The way he spoke when it was about Bonnie, it sounded to raw to naked, too honest.

Crossing his arms underneath his chest he spoke. "And how do you plan on doing that? The last time I checked, you were shipped off to the land of misfits." he says eyes exaggerating his words.

For her part Elena grimaces before pulling the picture she had harbored from Stefans room. "By saving Bonnie." she says with a lop sided grin. If she were the one to save Bonnie everyone would see that she did care for Bonnie and forgive her for everything that had happen with Damon. Most importantly, Stefan and Bonnie would forgive her and take her back.

He furrowed thick brows. Elena wasn't the type of girl that could save anything or anyone. She was the girl that fell when running from the bad guy. The same girl who didn't run out the house when a crazed person was chasing after her but ran up the stairs. "Bonnie doesn't need saving." he says simple at that. Out of all the people who wanted to save Bonnie, Elena was the last person who could do it. For starters she was trying to save her from something...someone who meant no harm.

Annoyed she waved the picture in front of his face yet again. "Yes she does and clearly I'm the only one who see's the threat that Katherine brings to the table." she says matter of fact. Bonnie was with Katherine because she had clearly missed her, and she would save Bonnie from the mess that Katherine would create.

He snorted unfazed by the photo. Bonnie and Katherine had spent a great amount of time together and in that time, they had taken many pictures. Katherine had even kept a photo album which was weird but she was happy and less bitchy, which meant Bonnie was a good influence on her. Katherine had even went as far to send him a couple of pictures from her phone, at first he thought she was playing with him and had wanted to call her on her bitch move, but instead he found himself keeping the pictures, if only to remind him of what he was missing...what he might never have again. "Where'd you get this from, I know for a fact that neither gave it to you so..." he drawled.

Suddenly finding her feet fascinating she speaks. "I got it from Stefans room, while you were in the shower." she says before snapping her eyes up at him. Damon didn't seemed fazed by the turn of events, in fact it was like he knew already. Before she could further question he spoke.

"Don't tell me you're that girl?" he questioned his nose turned up. On occasion he had met that girl. The creepy chick that had called too much. The clingy girl that couldn't let go, the same girl that he had either compelled or ended up killing in the end.

She glares his way. She had a plan and plan that would work as long as she planned carefully. "Don't pretend your not that guy." she refutes, with her arms crossed in front of her chest. "How many times have you stalked a girl who has repeatedly told you they want nothing to do with you, or better yet just want to be your friend." she says with a brow raised. "In fact I bet you've tried to go to Bonnie numerous times, tried to go to her house, get in her room, and its all because you want a glimpse, a little reminder of what you used to have together." she said pausing. "Only to find out that you've been deleted." she says knowingly.

He smirked despite the fact that her words were hitting home. "If you're trying to be Katherine you suck at it."

"And your deflecting." she says holding up yet another picture this time that had included Stefan, Bonnie and Katherine. She had to practically beg Stefan to take pictures yet with Bonnie and Katherine he had hammed it up with the best of them. "Did you know about this?" she asked pointedly. Damon had never lied to her, never and she needed to know if he knew what was going on.

He shrugged. "Bonnie and Stefan have always been close." he says nonchalantly. "As for Katherine, she and Stefan are stuck together." he says filling his glass with whisky yet again. "Since Stefan loves Bonnie, Katherine will want to love her to and vice versa." he admits. "The three of them are like peanut butter and jelly. Stefan and Bonnie serve as peanut butter and jelly while Katherine is the bread.

She threw her hands up in the air. He knew about this and let it happen. What happen to wanting to protect Bonnie or Stefan. What happen to wanting to help her and himself. No he was making jokes that weren't funny at all. "You know what, if you're gonna make jokes I'm gonna leave." she threw out. "But just remember I'm all you have and instead of pining away I'm going to make progress." she threw the picture at him. "Enjoy your hand Damon, that is if you can get it up." she says spitefully.

He watched as she walked out of the room and met her at the door. "I'm sure Stefan is enjoying Katherine and her hands." he says causing her to let out a huff and leave the boarding house all together.

When he was finally alone he thought back to what she had said, Elena had the right idea about saving Bonnie, not from Katherine though, they had bigger problems then Katherine and he was going to make sure that those problems went away. He knew Bonnie was searching for answers he was going to be the man to help her find those answers wether she wanted his help or not.

If anyone was to ask him why now, why was he suddenly going back on his word of giving Bonnie her space and letting her live her life with Mason, it was simple he loved her. And he wanted to be the one to save her, and he would from everything and everyone and that included her father, her mother, and Elena if needed.

**BB-BB-BB**

After I had left the Lockwood mansion I had every intention of going home, but for some odd reason I had taken a different route. Soon I find myself parked in front of a familiar white house in fact it was the same house from my dream. Everything was like as it was in my dream, the huge trees that were on either side of the property. The lush red of the door and the same feeling washed over me.

Despite the fact that I knew I should get home I found myself getting out of the car and actually walking to the red door. I needed to know if this were true if he were really here, or if I just happen to drive by the house that looked so familiar.

After making my way down the brick path I feel the wind pick up as my hands start to shake just a little. Still I march forward. In the distance I hear the sound of a crow and look behind me to see nothing. Turning around yet again I take the steps that are between me and the door. Without much thought I ring the doorbell once and then it opens.

"Hello Bonnie, I've been expecting you." he says with a curt nod of he head.

I let out a gasp as I see that it's all true. "Elijah." I whisper

A.n.2: Tada you made it to the end. So Elena is spiraling downward and will continue to fall from grace. Look for a showdown between Bonnie and Elena to finally happen. Bonnie and Katherine are going to embark on an adventure, Mason and Stefan team up and Damon is going to start putting things together. Drop me a line tell me what you think.


	15. Chapter 14

**A.N. Hi everyone! I hope you all are having a good weekend! I'm back with an update! Thanks for all who've read and replied, you're the best. Enjoy**

**special thanks to: aprilf00l, randomlittleme, heleana220, and crystal1998**

**xoxo**

**queena**

"_Once you know what love is, you'll never let it end"_

**Chapter 14: What doesn't kill you**

When I was little, my grandmother had always said that I had too much courage for my own good, instead of running from things I was the fearless little girl who just dived into any and everything without thinking about the repercussions and right in this instant I could clearly hear her telling me that I would never learn. Well it appeared that maybe just maybe I was going to learn today.

Currently I was sitting down in a plush chair while Elijah had served to the two of us tea and biscuits. On the outside I hoped I looked like someone who wasn't scared because the night before I had finally come face to face with the man who had been following me in my dreams and now I was sitting across from him with a tea cup in hand. This was freaking surreal and for a moment I wished I had brought backup. Stefan was out of the question because he would freak out and be against it plus he was slightly insane since going back on human blood and the last thing I wanted was for him to fight an original vampire who was the strongest vampire ever known to all supernatural. Mason was also out of the question because he was dealing with things that had to do with being the alpha of his pack; and let not forget that whole thing where vampire and werewolfs didn't get along, it was better if he too were safe. My best bet would've been Katherine she was old enough and certainly could talk a good game, next time I would bring her.

"Something wrong with your tea, is your tea not hot enough?" Elijah called causing the young girl to look up at him. She reminded him so much of her mother. It was a wonder, she had both vampire and werewolf chasing after her. He was positive she had both men wound in knots over her never really knowing the effect Bennett women had on the opposite sex, especially those who were supernatural.

My eyes shoot up at him. For the last thirty minutes we had sat in silence, me suddenly afraid to speak and him looking at me like I was some kind of science project. I guess I understood where he was coming from, if I were able to meet his eyes for longer then two seconds maybe I would be staring at him as well. I had to admit that he was rather good looking, and quite proper. And he had the best hair I had ever seen. It was so shiny. He was one of those guys that could do a shampoo commercial and you would totally believe because he had really good hair. He could also wear a suit like no other, I thought the Salvatore brothers looked dashing in suits, put them next to Elijah and the original would win hands down.

I bite my lip and realize that I had totally spaced out and by the looks of Elijah he had noticed it to. I feel a blush creep to my cheeks. "It's hot, quite hot and really good!" I say stammering over my words.

Elijah crosses his legs and looks at the girl again a smile creeping to his lips. "Is that why you haven't tasted it?" he says realizing that once again he had made her blush. She is quite the specimen. An almost flirtatious grin forms on his lips, he tilts his head in an almost teasing manner, wiggles his eyebrows and watches as she flushes even more.

Once he realizes what he's just done he immediately stands up and heads for the bar. "Perhaps you might want something...stronger?" he questions while pouring two glasses of his favorite alcoholic beverage. Though he knew Bonnie was not of age, some things called for leniency, this would also serve as an ice breaker for the two of them. He wanted her comfortable and at ease with him because if he had it his way the once Alexandria was released from her imprisonment then the three of them would become a family finally, and he'd make sure the three of them would be together forever.

Turning around he wasn't surprised to see the witch behind him and when he handed her their hands touched and he felt a familiar current run through him. Something that was different all together, something he had never felt till now. "Here this might help with the nerves."

For a second I felt like something had happened but shook off what I was feeling as nerves and downed my drink before sitting back down. The burn of alcohol had helped calm me a bit more though Elijah was looking at me rather peculiarly. "You said you'd tell me everything when I was ready, I'm ready." I say looking over at him. I watch as he slowly walks my way and brings his chair so that it sits directly in front of me.

"Well then lets began." He says filling her glass yet again.

_**Elijah's Flashback**_

_He had made it a habit to not get too close to women, not because he didn't desire them but because they had the power to break a man down, to break him down to his very core and for him at the core of it all was his heart and his heart would always be his worst enemy. And right now, his heart was telling him that what he felt for Alexandria was the monumental love he had been secretly waiting for since Katerina had broken his heart. Alexandria had this power over him, she had this ability to take one look at him and change his whole outlook of life, she was the calm in the abyss of storm that had been his life since becoming a vampire. He had only served one role since becoming a vampire that had been protector of his family and head of his family, but with Ally as she so fondly liked to be called, he wanted more out of life...out of his life._

_He depended on Alexandria and that alone was reason enough for him to stay away from her. She would grow old one day and leave him and he didn't want to further attach himself to her. That was why for the last couple of weeks he had refused to see her. Normally he would never run from anything, he was a civilized original for goodness sake, but Alexandria Bennett was going to be his undoing, especially if he continued to frolic with her. Hence the reason he had stayed away. He had gone out of his way to avoid her all together, he refused meet her at their spot and had only gone into town in less it was imperative to fetch his brother._

_Two days after officially avoiding Alexandria for three weeks he had gone to fetch Nik at the local pub and spotted the girl in question along with her best friend Grayson Du Pres. The moment he had seen the two of them together he felt his vampire senses coming to life and that was when he realized her loved her. _

_His first intentions was again to fetch Niklaus and leave this dreadful town but she caught up with him, or maybe he had slowed down for her. Either way when the two of them collided Alexandria had looked him in the eyes without saying a word, pushed a folded piece of paper into his hand, leant up and kiss his cheek and then left him standing alone to watch her in wonder._

_That night he had debated with himself for an hour on wether he should even further indulge in what he knew was probably doomed from the start. A witch and a vampire, surly that was something that books were written about. He was destined to live on forever as an abomination of nature and she was a goddess to nature, they were an oxymoron but together they were free...happy._

_Throwing caution in the wind, he decided to meet her at least for one last time before saying farewell._

_It was late at night, the stars were glistening up in the sky and despite the fact that it was summer he realized that it might be quite chilly for the young witch, with a big heart. He'd have to offer her his coat in case she caught a chill. _

_When he spotted her, she was lying on a blanket on the grass her eyes drawn up to the sky. For a moment he stood and just watched her. You could tell what kind of mood Alexandria was in just by looking at her and right now, she looked so blissful just looking up at the stars._

_With his hands deep in his pockets he took his time walking over to her, not minding the fact that his Italian loafers were being destroyed by the wet grass. The only thing that mattered was being close to her. When he was half way to her, brilliant eyes lit up and met his and the smile she had rewarded him with would've jumpstart his heart had his heart needed to beat._

"_You came" she squealed getting up and running to him. When she lept into his arms he couldn't help but hold her closer. He knew he needed to let her go, she was so young, she deserved a real chance and living but the moment he saw her his walls came crumbling down. He nuzzled his nose in her soft curls, Alexandria made him feel loved, she made him feel everything that he had sworn to never feel again._

_He had been spent most of his life as a vampire running away, but right here with her he didn't want to run anymore. He was tired of running, especially from what he wanted most. _

"_I' he says pausing slightly as she pulled away from him. It was then that he realized that her beautiful eyes were red and swollen from crying. Tear stains were evident on her butterscotch coated skin, and he swore that whoever dared to hurt her would never live another day. Caressing her cheeks he let almond eyes rest on her. "Alexandria, what has happen, are hurt?" he asked suddenly frantic._

_She shook her head and smiled up at him, cupping his cheeks as well. "I was afraid that you wouldn't come" she said pausing as to swallow hard. "But you're here" she said smiling his way._

_He touched her soft face brushing stray tears off of her cheek. "Alexandria" he nearly whispered._

"_I had a talk with my father." she admitted. "I told him everything! I told him that instead of staying here that I want to study in Europe, it'll be great experience that I cant bare to pass up." she says pausing momentarily before bringing bright eyes up to look at him. She reached out and touched his chilled hand and smiled softly. "I also told him about you-"_

_Taking a deep breathe she spoke again. "I told him I loved you," she says biting her lip. "Because I do, love you." she admitted her bright eyes suddenly down cast. _

_He watched as she took a step back and bit on her fingernail. He had never let another woman get a close to him as he had let Alexandria, and she had loved him, she had loved him! He was at a loss of words, he loved her to, this he had known but the bigger question was, if he could bare to lose her in the end, or if it was better to let her go now so he wouldn't have her to lose in the first place?_

_Looking up she spoke. "Letting out a nervous chuckle she spoke again. "He wasn't happy about any of it," she says before turning to face him yet again. "He thinks I'm making a mistake with you. He'd rather I date someone like Grayson." she said with a snort as if that would ever happen. "I know he doesn't want us to be together but I think he realizes that it doesn't matter what he wants, because I want you." she says stepping closer._

_His throat felt small and his voice came out barley a whisper. "You-you want me?" he questioned amazed by the mere fact that this girl gave her heart away so easily._

_She flashed a brilliant smile. "Well yeah!" she says with a playful eye roll. "Your worldly, your smart and you make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world." she says suddenly turning away from him. "Everyone thinks I'm crazy for telling you this. Miranda, Isobel and Grayson think im losing my mind. They all think that if you really loved me, then you'd tell me so."_

_she said whirling around. "So do you love me Elijah or is everyone right. Am I just fooling myself into believing that what we have is real?" she asked walking over to him. _

_He stood as still as possible afraid to speak, afraid of what he might say. He knew what he wanted to say, he knew that he wanted to tell her that he loved her to. He also knew what he was suppose to say, he was suppose to let her go, let her grow up and become a powerful witch that had nothing to do with his kind. What came out of his mouth was quite different._

"_Despite the fact that I have tried with all of my abilities to stop myself," he says pausing as a look of sudden despair then understanding crosses her features. "I cannot help but be just as enthralled, as positively in love with you Alexandria Bennett as you are with me."_

_**end of flashback**_

Elijah smiled whimsically at the thought of what had occurred after Alexandria had told him that she had loved him, and he had admitted her to her just the same. "That day, when we surrendered to our fate of loving each other, we completed a spell." he said pausing as yet another smile occurred to his lips. "Alexandria and I bonded, we shared blood-sealing our love for all of eternity." he says finally smiling.

I gasped at his words as our eyes met. My mother had completed a spell, a spell linking her and her true love forever. At the mere thought of this sacred bond it made me think of how Damon and I had shared blood briefly. I didnt know what I would do, if I was linked to him forever.

Shakily I ran my hand through my hair before opening my mouth to further ask the implications of the spell, maybe I wouldn't have the same fate as my mother. My heart couldn't be linked to Damon forever, because not only was I with Mason but I had already fallen for him.

I didnt get a chance to ask Elijah the question that had been on my mind because as if he had read my mind he had anwered all on his own.

"The kind of love your mother and I have, it doesn't go away." Elijah says before sipping some of his drink. "We're bonded and forever our hearts will be intertwined."

**ML-ML**

**Mason**

If someone would've told him months ago that anyone with the last name Salvatore would be one of his closes friends-let alone someone he actually trusted, he would have gladly laughed in the persons face. Now though things had changed and Stefan was his friend, hence the reason he had invited the vampire over. He trusted the vampire, with something, someone that meant the world to him and if he could trust that Stefan cared for Bonnie, he could trust him with anything.

He could talk to the vampire, and he knew that Stefan would listen. He was positive once Jules had alarmed everyone in the pack, and they would all look to him for answers...for orders because he was their fearless leader, and he was fearless-but he liked to have an action plan instead of doing things on the fly, hence the reason Stefan was here. Stefan was a vampire and he could've heard rumblings- that could aid in the search for Sam and Brady.

"Thanks for coming over so quickly." the wolf said leading the two of them out of the kitchen. Bonnie had left a long time ago, and he would've been able to talk to Stefan but he damned phone had been ringing off the hook since Jules had told just about everyone in the pack that Sam and Brady were missing. Word had traveled fast and now everyone was waiting when he made his order, which would come in a few hours.

"No problem." Stefan said easily. "You said it was important so I'm here." he said taking a seat. "Though I gather whatever you have to say you don't want Bonnie involved, hence the reason you didn't tell her I was coming over." the vampire said knowingly. "What's going on?" he further questioned brow furrowed. Bonnie was his best friend and if anything were wrong he wanted to be their to help fix it because, she was his family.

Mason brought out two beers one for him and the other for Stefan and sat it down in front of the two and just when he was about to question if he had heard anything about vampires in this town attacking his pack, he heard the sound of his living room door slamming. Less than ten seconds later in walked his best friend, the same best friend whom was taken home by Jase.

Rushing over to her he wasn't surprised when she jerked away. "Jules I thought you went home?" he questioned concern crossing his features.

The girl in questioned turned her eyes from the vampire in the corner to her best friend. "I did but my house is empty, so I came here." she said simply.

It was on the tip of his tongue to ask where Jase was, but knowing Jase he was probably getting her food in case she got hungry later and of course Jules would leave once she was sure Jase had gone out.

The girl scoffed as her eyes narrowed on the vampire then turning them back to Mason. "What is wrong with you Mason?" she asked disgusted. It was true that witch had effected everything about him. She had hoped that once she came back he would be doing something yet here he was breaking bread with a freaking vampire! "You're suppose to be fixing this not sitting around twiddling your thumbs." she says jabbing him in the chest. "Two of your pack members are missing do you understand that or are you too busy with you new girlfriend and your new best friend to give a damn about your family!" she roared.

His blue/green eyes flashed with yellow as he kept the beast at bay. He couldn't...wouldn't fight with her. Jules was a hothead, and right now she was just reacting because as of yet nothing had happen, though he did have a plan, he just wanted to tell everyone together. "I'm working on bringing them home Jules, maybe if you could give me time, more time then two fucking hours, then I could get something done." he growled.

She scoffed and folded dainty arms underneath her chest before fixing her eyes on the vampire in question. "And you," she said taking a step further and stopping with the look Mason sent her way. "For all we know you and your supercreepy brother could've had something to do with everything that is happening!" she says shakily while running his way only to be caught by Mason.

He met eyes with Stefan and held onto his friend as she started crying though she was still angry. "Calm down Jules, calm down." he whispered into her ear."

"We have to find them." she said almost to herself

"We will." he said while rocking her."

"I cant go home its too quiet"

"you can stay here."

When she had finally calmed down he let her go she headed for the stairs only to pivot his way as if she had just gotten an idea.

"Oh my god," she said looking at a photograph of Bonnie that was sitting on one of the tables, yeah Mason was _that guy_. "Your magical vagina- she can help us, she can prove her worth and help find them with her magic!" Jules said exclaimed.

The moment the words came out of her mouth, he dismissed her words. Bonnie hadn't done magic since her mother had summoned her. In fact that night she had done minimal magic and still Alexandria had been able to contact her. Although Bonnie could be an asset, he didn't want her using magic, just in case Alexandria got a hold of her again.

"I don't want Bonnie involved." he said with a finality that anyone else would never challenge except for Jules of course.

"Why?" the blond wolf asked. "Are you afraid she'll get hurt or something?"

"No because this is pack business and we take care of our own!" he bellowed causing Jules to jump back in surprise.

Biting her lip momentarily she spoke. "Does this mean you have a plan?" she asked only to get stone walled.

Mason sucked his teeth. "Go upstairs take a guest room, and get some sleep" he said dismissing her. "When you wake up, you'll know everything you need to know." he said causing the girl to I give him a brief a hug before pulling away and turning to the vampire.

"I meant what I said vampire" the blond said before disappearing out of the room.

**DS-DS-DS**

**Damon**

Parked in his newest toy, a 1967 black impala, Damon Salvatore sat outside of Elijah Mikaelson house in an attempt to keep an eye on his little bird. He had been trailing the petite beauty since the last time he had spoken with his sometimes friend Elena Gilbert. At the mere thought of her, he felt himself grimace. Who would've thought that the mere thought of sweet innocent Elena would conjure up such a bad taste in his mouth. The Elena he thought he knew was now replaced with a self severing bitch who he could barely stand.

It was times like this when he wished he was one of those guys who believed in hopes, dreams and wishes like his brother. Stefan had believed in happy endings, well at least he use to and now, well now everyone was fucked, but no more then he and Bonnie. Stefan had at least found or rather rekindled his love affair with Katherine; while, he was screwed. For a moment he closed his eyes, if only things were much easier, if only he could've been that guy for Bonnie, then maybe they would be together now and he wouldn't be waiting in the wings, to save her and remind her of their love. Maybe then they'd be together.

_**Damon's Dream**_

_The sound of pots and pans banging almost furiously caused him to crack open his eyes. He had literally been asleep all of ten minutes when the sudden loud sound of annoyance had interrupted his beauty sleep, not that he needed it, he was a bonafide babe! What he didn't like was being interrupted in a heavenly dream where Bonnie was playing the good girl who had a crush on her teacher, needless to say he was the teacher that kept her after school._

_Quickly he pulled the blankets off of him and pulled on a pair of black boxer briefs before heading out the door. On his way out the door he stepped on a squeaky toy and muttered a curse word. How in the hell did he get this toy of some sort in his room, he was a complete neat freak and never left his room littered with anything on the floor, let alone a toy that could be for a an animal..maybe Stefan was munching on golden retrievers these days. For all he knew Katherine probably added that into the mix of her sex play with Stefan. He shuddered at the thought. At least they hadn't woke him up with their kinky sex play, because that shit was ridiculous. _

_Nothing was worst then hearing his brother moan like a bitch, he was a screamer but Bonnie was so much better at it. He knew if needed they could totally beat Katherine and Stefan at their own game. He smiled to himself at the thought, he might even have to suggest it to his little witch. They could turn it into a game, surely he could never get enough of her, and she couldn't get enough of him as well. They were fire and ice, pleasure and pain together the perfect combination._

_He was brought out of his thoughts by the sounds of voices and soon finds his way into the kitchen. He spots Stefan and Bonnie playing around while cooking, or at least attempting to cook breakfast. He shakes his head because the two of them were no chefs, he spots Katherine sitting on the edge of the counter a mug in her hand a sly and familiar smirk on her lips. He recognized the look on her face because he was sure he had the same look, it was one of happiness. Together they silently watched as Bonnie and Stefan bumped about the kitchen almost oblivious to them._

_Then mint green eyes look in his direction and the feeling he gets is something he had wanted to feel since his mother had died, and that was pure love, and felt like while looking at Bonnie had submerged in love. Almost on its on accord his feet had carried him her way. He watched out of the side of his eyes as Katherine and Stefan had shared a look before leaving the room all together._

"_You were suppose to stay in bed so that we could bring your breakfast." she says with a pout on her bow like lips._

"_If you stayed in bed, I would've eaten my fill of breakfast." he says wrapping his arm around her and tugging her much closer. Gripping her close to him, he knelt down close and captured her lips in a hungry kiss. When she wound her arm around him, he growled low in his throat. He could never get enough of her, she was too much and not enough at the same time. Their tongues danced and dueled together as the way their bodies would soon move, when suddenly she pushed at his chest, a sly smile on her lips._

_Mint green eyes roll as she shakes her head, causing her curls to fall over her shoulder and forehead. "You hungry?" she asked tilting her head to the side as his mouth starts cascading kisses everywhere before he finally turns her around to see brilliant bright green eyes._

"_Always." he says licking his lips seductively and when she rolls her eyes once again he grins widely her way and wiggles his eyebrows suggestively._

_Within a blink of an eye she had pushed him to breakfast table instructing him to shut his eyes in which he does. He can't help but hope that maybe she'll crawl on top of the breakfast table and let him eat his fill, one could only hope, he shut his eyes and crossed his fingers at that. Wishes were starting to come true._

_Minutes later she had returned and he knew that because of the wonderful sound of heartbeats. Opening his eyes, he caught sight of the most wonderful thing in the world, his two girls together. His breath caught in his throat the moment he saw Bonnie rock their baby back and forth while singing a song. When she's done singing Bonnie reluctantly puts the beautiful baby in his arms._

"_It seems like your favorite girl is awake and looking for daddy." she says with a smile while brushing back unruly curls. "Aria, don't you want mommy to hold you?" she asked while the baby continued to look up at her daddy._

_Once the girl is in his arms, he looks down at her, so small, so fragile- so beautiful. She is the perfect combination of he and Bonnie. Her skin is hint darker then his, with bright eyes. One eye is the color of his own, azure while the other is olive green just like Bonnie. Within a blink of an eye he leans down and nuzzle the babies nose. "Aria" he says and when she coos in his arms he feels his heart about to burst._

_He smiled down at the little girl. He had always been a ladies man but this was something different all together. He was a father and nothing could compare to the love he had for his daughter or her mother._

_Bonnie soon moved to his side closer to him and leans her head on his shoulder. And in that moment he had never felt happier. He felt truly loved, and loved completely. For the first time ever he was happy...content even. Now he knew what it felt like to be happy._

"_I love you" he says placing a kiss to her temple, before doing the same to the happy baby in his arms, his baby...their baby!_

"_And I love you,"she says looking over at him. Her hand caresses his cheek with bright eyes._

_When he blinks he see's Stefan and Katherine who are both looking on both happy. He hadn't seen his brother so happy since the days when they were human. As for Katherine he was sure he had never seen her as happy as she looked now. He had a family, he had Bonnie and their daughter Aria. He had his brother back, after everything they had gone through and he had a friend in the one person who showed him what he had always wanted, wasn't her or her replica but what had been in front of him the whole time._

_Suddenly the sound of heavy rain disturbs their peaceful morning, followed by the loud crashing sound of thunder and lightening. The lights in the kitchen flicker plunging them into the dark, and he at once hands Aria to her mother, but not before reminding everyone to stay calm, its just a storm._

_When he turns around he finds Stefan standing in front of him, gone was his happy face and back was the brooding features he was use to. "Stefan?"_

"_I thought one day that we could brothers again, but you ruined that by screwing the girl you knew I loved." Stefan said stone faced. "If it ever came down to me or you, I would always chose you but you could never chose me. And that Damon, is why you and I can never be brothers again."_

_Before he had a chance to say anything Stefan was gone. Whirling around he finally caught sight of Bonnie who was cradling Aria in her arms. He smiles down at the two of them, only to notice that mint green eyes that were once vibrant are now vacant. He takes a step forward causing her to take a step back. _

"_Bonnie" he calls his voice wavering. "Please" he pleads his hands out. He wants to hold her in his arms, he wants to hold Aria in his arms, they were the best thing that had ever happen to him._

"_We could have had it all, you, me and Aria! We could've been a family but you ruined it. You ruined us!" she says holding the baby in her arms._

"_Bonnie." he calls as panic sets in. She's looking at him like he's a stranger. _

"_Don't worry about them Damon." Mason says as he wraps his arm around Bonnie. "I'll take good care of them, after all they are my family."_

_Panicked rolls through his body. "Bonnie, I love you, I love Aria!" he calls using his vamp speed to reach her, just as she disappears._

_Soon the lights come on and he finds himself standing in front of one Emily Bennett._

"_Emily?" he questions. He closes his eyes momentarily thinking something is wrong and when he opens his eyes he see's the witch yet again. "What did you do to them, bring them back, bring back Bonnie and Aria...bring back my family!" he demands using speed to rush over to her. He stands in front of the witch eyes bleeding back. "Bring them back."_

_Emily smiles his way. "You want them back, prove it, earn them and they'll be yours." she says turning away from him. "Not many witches fall in love with vampires, and vice versa," she says pausing. "Bonnie fell in love with you for a reason, just as you fell for her for a reason, don't take those who you love for granted because within a blink of an eye they can be gone"_

_**end of dream**_

**BB-BB**

After his story of love I was nearly speechless. I had never seen or heard anyone love as hard as Elijah had seemed to love my mother. And if I really thought about it, my mother hadn't been all to happy without Elijah which proved that she loved him as much as he loved her. It appeared that without each other they were just lost, and it made me long for that type of love, where you completely give yourself over to someone and in return they do the same thing.

The saddest part of the story, had been the fact the two people who had obviously loved each other so openly, freely and whole heartedly didn't get their chance to be together, and that alone made me want to help, nobody deserved to live life without getting the chance to have that great big love of their lives, and if I could help I would all I could do.

"Wow" I say suddenly. "you love her, its written all over your face even in pictures." I say causing Elijah to look up at me.

"Alexandria is the love of my life" Elijah said almost desperately. He had lived such a long life, and in all his years he had never thought he would find someone who he had loved more then Tatia, more than Katherine but then came Alexandria Bennett, the way he felt for her proved to be more then he had felt in all his years as human being and immortal creature. "And together you and I are going to save her...we have to save her." he says now in front of the girl that was the key to everything.

I nodded my head in understanding. I had never seen anyone love as hard as Elijah had loved my mother it was written all over his face in the, it shown in the way his eyes lit up at the mere mention of her, at the look that crossed his features once he looked at a photograph of her. When I looked at Elijah I saw a man in love, a man in misery without his other half and I knew what I had to do, not just for him but for my mother. From what I had gathered from her journal entries Elijah had been her everything as well, without him she had felt lost. I couldn't imagine being that person, being separated from the person that I knew was destined to be my everything...my other half. My mother was in love with Elijah and vice versa, they had fallen in love the moment their eyes locked. Her journal had even said that the kind of love they had was what story books were made of. What she had left out was the fact that their hearts were now intertwined together, it was the reason why they could communicate. Elijah could speak with her telepathically and at times reach her in the depths of her mind. They were soulmates. Their story gave me hope, that maybe just maybe true love did exist with the right person.

I reached for his hand somewhere finding strength in the way he loved my mother. I would be lying if I said that this would be easy, that betraying my father would be easy but everyone deserved to have free and what my father was doing, was wrong. I was sure in his own way he loved my mother, but if I had learned anything from loving Damon, was that sometimes love wasn't enough, sometimes the best thing you could do for the person you loved the most was to let them go.. Set them free even if it hurt. "We're going to save her, I promise."

Elijah nods his head and kisses her hand in return. "You remind me of her you know." He whispers. "Instead of asking questions you're ready to dive in without anything from me," he says pausing. She reminded him so much of Ally, her mannerisms, the way she dealt with things was purely her mother, but their was something else about this girl that was so familiar, it reminded him of someone he just couldn't figure out who.

When she cleared her throat he realized that yet again he was caught gazing at her. He was not in any way trying to make her feel uncomfortable he was just trying to figure things out. "I apologize if I keep staring its just..."

I shake my head stopping him. "It's okay, your not making me feel uncomfortable." I say dismissing the his words. I smiled timidly his way, if we were going to be a team I needed him to do me one favor and then we'd save my mother together.

"Do you have any questions about...anything." he questioned.

I bit my lip, the only thing that I wanted was to make sure that my father was safe. I was positive that after everything that had occurred Elijah wanted nothing more than to kill my father, however I wouldn't let that happen. "Elijah," I call.

"Yes Bonnie." he says recognizing that look. He can remember when Rebekah had given him that look, every single time she had a request and he had given in to her.

"I need you to pardon my father for what he's done." I say yet again boldly to the vampire who gets up again and walks calmly over to the bar and fixes the two of us a drink. At the mere mention of my father his body language says everything that he wont say to me. I watch silently as he run his hands through his hair giving him a slightly disheveled look, though his hair still really looks good. The clock in the cottage ticks as the two of us are both silent and when he walks over to me and hands me the glass its only then that he speaks.

"Bonnie, you have no idea how dangerous Grayson is," Elijah says pausing. "The damage he has caused to our family is irreparable." he says calmly. "He is not a man that deserves to live after everything he has done to Alexandria and to you." he says brown meeting green.

I openly gaped at him. I was positive that Elijah wasn't a saint, in fact I was positive he had done horrible things in his long life. He was a vampire which meant he had probably killed once upon a time. My father may have not been perfect, what he had done may not have been ideal but that didn't mean I wanted him dead. "He's my father!" I nearly roar. "I don't want him hurt." I say again as Elijah inclines his head to the side.

Leaning forward he speaks. "I see you've got that Bennett determination and wild mouth." he says biting back a smile. "Fine your father wont be harmed," he says waving his hand. "You have my word." he says with an air of finality

I raise my brows and take a shot. "Good." I say licking the remnants of whisky off of my lips. The good thing about being a witch was that I had a very high tolerance for alcohol which meant on my way home, I would be okay to drive. A chill suddenly ran through me causing me to rub my arms. "I should get going." I say standing. Before I can blink Elijah is standing before.

"This isn't going to be easy Bonnie, setting your mother free will require lots of deception on your part." he says motioning for her to follow to his study where he had set up camp over the years. The place was a mess which was something he was never used to but he found that he was starting to pick up on Alexandria habits, maybe it was because he missed or so, or maybe it was because he cared so much.

I followed him silently until we stopped at a room which was similar to my own fortress where I kept all of my findings. "If we're going to do this, you need to be protected." he says holding up a bracelet.

I give him a look that clearly reads wtf. "I can't-"

"You can" Elijah says now in my face. "Your father is a very dangerous man, and in order to get to the top of the food chain he had to essentially make a deal with the devil." he says pausing as green eyes go wide. " His power is dark...dare I say evil and if he ever were to find out that you were trying to release your mother..."

I swallowed hard at his words. My mother had eluded in her journal entries that my father was dabbling in art that were very dark, so dark that she had feared for our lives because in order to get those powers my father had to make sacrifices, what that was, she had never gone into detail. Elijah puts the bracelet on my wrist as our eyes meet. "Thank you." I say trying not to admire the piece of jewelry. It looked so familiar to me, almost like I had seen it before, maybe in a dream, maybe in a photograph.

He nods his head. "It'll help warrant against attacks, though in order to truly be invincible to his powers your going to have to get his crystal of light, as well as your mothers crystal." he says pausing thoughtfully. "Your mother hid the whereabouts of her crystal though I'm sure if you've found the journals you'll be able to decipher where her crystal is." he says with a bite of his lips. The truth was, he didn't like sending Bonnie out to find some of the ingredients he was sure would break the spell, but the only person who could break the spell Grayson had put on Alexandria would be Bonnie, she was the key after all.

The weight of his words was starting to hit me, it seemed that if I needed so many protection spells and crystals that maybe my father was far worst then anyone had cared to tell me.

"I should get going." I say noticing the time. I really needed to get home because with my luck Mason and Stefan would be at the house and then how was I going to explain where I had been for the last three hours, then again I could always say I was out mediating, but I'd rather not lie to the men in my life in less it was for a really good reason.

"Yes of course." Elijah said ushering her out of the home. "Bonnie, I know this is difficult- that this is a lot for you to take in, but remember if you ever need anyone I will always be here.' he says stepping closer to the girl. He hears her hitched breath and smiles her way. Leaning forward he places a kiss to her forehead. "Sometimes its best to go back to the beginning to find what your looking for."

I nodded my head and rushed out the door. My feet honesty couldn't move fast enough.

**MF-SS**

**Mason**

"I'm sorry about that but, as you know two members of my pack have gone missing and I've spent the better half of the morning on the phone trying to in contact with some people who may have seen them." he says finally placing his cell phone down.

It seemed that the panic that Jules had- was starting to spread and he knew it was only a matter of time before she had convinced others that Brady and Sam had been abducted because his girlfriend was a Bennett witch, and he couldn't have that. For all they knew Brady and Sam could've gotten lost, it certainly had happen before- people got lost. But he knew that Jules wasn't rationally thinking and she would blame any and everyone for the reason her boyfriend and brother were now missing and that included stirring up trouble with vampires, and witches wether they were at fault or not.

Stefan nodded his head. He had been here for a while and in the time he had heard lots of things that were said especially by Jules who was now finally resting upstairs but not before attempting to tear him a new one. She believed that he or his brother had something to do with her missing family, and in all honesty he could easily so that he knew nothing about it. As for Damon, despite the fact that he and his brother were no longer on speaking terms, he knew that Damon didn't have anything to do was the missing wolfs, and the reason for that was Bonnie. His brother was trying to prove his worth to Bonnie and targeting wolves just for the hell of it, epically wolves that just so happen to be a part of her boyfriends pack, was a line he was positive even Damon wouldn't cross, if only for Bonnie.

Thick brows furrowed as he folded his arms underneath his chest. "And your wondering if any vampires had anything to do with it?" Stefan finishes knowingly. It wasn't a stretch to think that Mason, thought that vampires or a vampire, was the cause of this recent incident, especially since Mystic Falls was full of vampires.

He walked over to his favorite chair and took a seat. If vampires were the cause of this, Jules wouldn't let this go, she'd go for blood and much more. Hell for all he knew she might even expose those who were vampires- especially if they had anything to do with the disappearance of Sam and Brady. And in all honesty he would back her because when you messed with one pack member, one member of the family you got them all. "It crossed my mind." he says pausing.

"It wouldn't be the first time a vampire went after a wolf, especially not in this town." he said almost bitterly while meeting eyes with Stefan. He liked Stefan he was a cool guy but sometimes he couldn't help but think about how he had been wronged first by Katherine and then when Damon had pulled a bitch ass move when he moved back and had been flirting with Bonnie

not knowing she was in a relationship with the vampire. One minute he was cracking jokes with her and then he had gone back to his truck only to get a silver blade to the stomach curtsey of a jealous vampire.

Stefan leant forward hands clasped together. He had known what Mason was talking about. A while back before Bonnie and Damon had been officially gotten together and not just fooling around. He could easily remember how upset his brother had been at the sight of Bonnie and Mason together even though they were just being friendly, and the next thing he knew his impulsive brother had stabbed Mason Lockwood for the hell of it. "But that was before he knew," he suddenly paused and shook his head. He was still getting out of the habit of immediately trying to protect his brother. Right now Bonnie and Caroline, his to best friends and his girlfriend were his priority, Damon could rot in hell. Clearing his throat once again he spoke. "That was before, now most vampires known that one bite from a wolf will kill us." he says easily.

He regarded Stefan with a look, though his reasoning was good he still felt this nagging feeling that if this had to do was someone it was closer to home then further away. "They were in human form which meant whomever got to them knew about the whole wolf bite thing." he says pausing. He hated to integrate Stefan because the two of them were friends thanks to Bonnie, but he needed information about what was going on in the vampire world and Stefan was the only person he knew he could talk to about this particular without hostilities getting in the way. "Do you think your brother had anything to do with this?' he questioned. "He could be using this as he chance to come between me and Bonnie. To get me away from Bonnie?" he furthered questioned. The words Jules had said earlier had run through his head, what if this was payback, or worst not even about those who were missing but because he had fallen for a witch who also had a vampire under her spell as well.

Stefan let out a sigh. He knew that Damon was capable of a lot of shit, he was a screw up, a hot head and this was something he would've done without batting an eye. But as of late, his brother had been concentrating on Bonnie and her well being, which was a plot twist to his must get Elena, must screw everyone over, must screw Elena over and over. Damon was simply too busy trying to save Bonnie, to do anything but stalk her. "As much as it pains me to say this." Stefan says pausing at the thought of beating the hell out of his brother popped into his head. "As we both know, Damon been wrapped up in everything that is Bonnie. He's been on a mission to save and or stalk her into submission, so I can't see him taking his eyes or his mind off of her long enough to plan an attack on your pack."

Mason let out a curse word. He had been afraid that- this would happen. It would be so much easier if he could just blame Damon Salvatore for everything, Jules would go ape shit and probably bite him, thus he would never have to deal with him in any form. Of course Jules would attack him after they had found Sam and Brady and then everything would be right in world. Of course that was just wishful thinking. He knew exactly what he needed to do.

Sitting back in his chair he spoke in his most business manner. "This-this is really bad." he admitted. "I've got a best friend who is a wreck, she missing her brother and the man she loves her mate. As alpha I have to do everything in my power to protect those that are in my pack and those I love," he says pausing as Stefan continues to look his way.

"If you need any help, I'm here." the vampire says easily.

Mason nods his head. "I'm calling a meeting with my pack tonight, and by tomorrow morning I'm going to search for Sam and Brady." he says walking over to the bar and this time pouring two glasses of whisky. Turning around he handed one glass to Stefan before taking a seat yet again. "Normally I would never ask you for anything but,"

"Bonnie" Stefan supplied.

The wolf nods. "She means everything to me- and I just want to make sure that she's ok." he says scratching his chin. "This thing with her parents, its really effecting her, she barely sleeps and I'd feel better knowing that someone who loves her, and someone I trust is taking care of her, watching out for her." he says stumbling over his words. Talking about his feelings was never something he had expected to do, especially with Stefan Salvatore.

Stefan emptied drained his drink. "You don't have to worry about Bonnie, I'll always look out for her." he admits.

"Good" Mason says walking over to his desk. "Now I've got to get a map and figure out the land surrounding where my pack members were missing." he says looking through his desk drawer.

Stefan too jumps to his feet. "If you want I can help. I can ask vampires that are from the area your friends went missing, it couldn't hurt to help."

"Thanks man"

**JE-JE-JE**

The room was dark as heavy breathing was heard. The sound of heavy metal. clinking along the stone ground echoed throughout the otherwise silent atmosphere. Their was an reek smell of something stale and musty in the air made his stomach churn on reflex. The hairs on the back on his neck stood up something was wrong, something was completely wrong. He shouldn't be here, they shouldn't be here, and that was when he remembered the young wolf who was traveling with him, Sam. He needed to protect Sam, Jules would never forgive him if something had happen to her brother, and he would never forgive himself for taking his eyes off the road

The taste of dirt was on his tongue, and he could feel pain in his lower abdomen The jeep that he wrecked sure had done a number on him, he hadn't felt this bad since the last time he went a couple rounds with Mason.

Brady had known one thing that was for sure and that when they had finally gotten free he was going to make whomever had dragged them here pay with every fiber in his body. The thought of vengeance made him, even though his lip hurt. Using his hand he swiped at the blood. He could only hope that Sam had minor injuries because Jules was sure to blow a fuse if her brother was harmed. With wide eyes that had now adjusted to the darkness, he felt around for anything and soon made it to his feet. The sound of a chain dragging along concrete told him he was indeed chained by the foot. He let out a curse word, they were obviously captured, but by whom he didn't know and why well that was yet another question.

"Sam" he called out in the dark, while sinking back down to his knees. He stretched his fingers as far as they could go as if trying to reach for someone who wasn't their. "Sam" he called again as panic began to set in. He listened really good for any sign of someone else being here with him in the pitch of black and that was when he heard someone groan.

"Brady, what the hell" the other man called as he noticed their surroundings. "What happen, why are we here?" he asked finding his hand was handcuffed to what he didn't know.

Before a reply could be uttered suddenly the lights were turned on causing the two men to squint at the sudden brightness. The sound of loud chunky boots hit the ground and when two sets of eyes finally open they look up to see whom their capture is.

"You" Brady seethes seeing red as he looks at someone who was once considered a friend.

"Haley" Sam calls looking up at the girl. "What the hell."

"I'm sorry about this boys, I really am, but I don't have a choice, he needs werewolf venom and lots of it." she says pausing thoughtfully. "And when word gets back to Mason and your pack, he'll send reinforcements, which means he'll get what he wants, and I'll get what I want." she says walking over to the guys and giving them each a cup of water. "I promise you wont be hurt, as long as you don't anger him, he wont use your body parts." she says before leaving them alone once again.

Moments later the door opened yet again, revealing this time a man. He smiled at the two wolves and rolled up his sleeves. "Don't worry this wont hurt too much." he says mockingly before closing in on the two men.

**BB-BB-BB**

Once in the safe confines of my car I realized that my first meeting with Elijah had gone better then I had ever thought. I had to admit that he had terrified me while in my dreams, it felt like he was stalking me, but I guess in his way he was trying to guide me to him.

The thing about Elijah was the fact that he seemed for the most part quite honest and open. What had really blown me away was the fact that Elijah was more imbedded in my life then I would've initially thought especially since he was like my mothers side piece. At the mere thought I grimaced. It appears that I had been compelled to forget the encounters I had with Elijah who had been a permanent fixture through most of my life.

The one thing that stuck out in the tale of my mother and Elijah was the fact that they had preformed the bonding spell, they had bonded together sealing their love forever. It had connected them even though my mother was trapped elsewhere. But the one thing the spell didn't do was keep them together, it just made their love for each other linger. They never got their chance to be together, to have a real life together and if it took everything I was going to give them that because they deserved to be happy.

The truth was shocking, though it seemed like everything had finally made sense now. Our lives had been a lie. My parents had never been happy and all along my mother wanted to take me away from my father so that we could live a nice normal life with her original vampire boyfriend. And as for my father he had keep me for himself as a way to get revenge on my mother because he loved her too much and she didn't love him enough. The only thing that seemed like it was a least decent about the stories Elijah had told me, had been his love for my mother and the love I had read that my mother had for him. They loved each other and never really had the chance to make it.

As I neared Mystic Falls I felt pressure began to build in my ears as my mind went on overdrive. My mind began to race as I thought about what I was really setting myself up to do. All the research I had done was to help free my mother but once I was finally alone, away from Elijah or Stefan, or Mason it all hit me really hard. In order to save my mother I had to betray my father and the fallout could be more then I bargain for. He may never forgive me or worst. He might try to hurt me the way he hurt my mother or go after the people I cared about, and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I brought on pain to any of them.

The thought of what was to come hit me hard and suddenly my stomach started cramping just as my head started pounding. I gripped the steering wheel so hard that my knuckles were beginning to change colors, as I tried waited for the moment the panic would go away.

Suddenly feeling ill I pulled over on the side of the road as my head began to pound, my hands began to shake and my heart...my heart began to beat at an alarming rate. Needing air I hurriedly scrambled out of the car flinging the seat belt off with a simple toss of my wrist. Once outside the car, I let out harsh breaths and my shaky legs feel weak, so much that I feel myself slumping over, almost as if im tumbling to the ground. And then when I expect to hit the floor I feel a cool hand on my back . My startled eyes look up and its then that see unfathomable azure eyes.

I open my mouth to say something to utter his name as intense eyes are looking down at me with so much love, admiration, and a hint of fear. "Damon" I whisper before slumping over.

The last thing I hear is the words "little bird" before my eyes close once again.

**Spoilers**: Bonnie and Damon take a walk down memory lane. Mason and the gang try to figure out the wolf situation. And Katherine returns!

a.n. 2 drop me a line tell me what you think


	16. Chapter 15

**A.N.** Hey all thanks again for reading and replying. This chapter has gone through so many revisions but finally i'm satisfied. It's very dialogue heavy so i hope you the enjoy the bamon!

special thanks to: vampluv3r, Brazilianfan1, and jewelsstars

xo

queena

* * *

><p>"<em>what if I told you it was all meant to be, would you believe me, would you agree"<em>

Kelly Clarokson

**Chapter 15: All I Ever Wanted**

I awoke with a sudden gasp. My startled eyes look up and its then that see unfathomable azure eyes. Damon, he's here with me again. Intense eyes are looking down at me with so much love, admiration, and a hint of fear. It leaves me paralyzed in his arms, and mesmerized by the stark look that's in his eyes and etched on his face. Even with sorrow, confusion and admiration marring his features he was still the most beautiful man I had ever seen. And he was here for me. It was like he knew I needed someone and out of thin air he was here with me. Damon Salvatore was here when I needed him.

"Il mio piccolo uccello." He whispers almost soundly; the only way I knew he had uttered those words was from reading his pink lips. In his arms, looking into those unfathomable blue eyes- its like everything else melts away. I'm drowning in his oceanic eyes, submerging in the dark and stormy waters that is Damon Salvatore and it feels like home.

Silently I watch him as he smiles, as if he can read me mind. His thumb grazes along my bottom lip as he cradles me to him once again. Pink lips are peppering kisses along my hair line

"Il mio amore." he whispers again causing my heart to flutter. I had always enjoyed hearing him speak Italian but never had my heart reacted to his words in such a way that caused fluttering.

I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me as an intense moment passed. Damon had never looked at me _that_ way, he looked so in love. It reminded me of Elijah. In my head I can hear original talking about how once two hearts connect they are forever intertwined. He said the moment a vampire falls in love, real love his heart would forever be connected to whomever enchanted him. To me it sounded like a sorted tale of love between witches and vampires. But it was evident Elijah hadn't thought of it that way. He saw it as meaning that true love does exist. My mother and Elijah were connected so deeply connected that at night they shared the same dreams. As for Damon and I, I couldn't deny that we had developed a deep connection. Of course our connection wasn't enough to save us from Elena Gilbert, but it was still something had been established and even now so long after sometimes if I let my guard down I could feel the raiments of that connection.

The bond we had developed was deep and now it scared me. What if my love for Damon or his sudden devotion to me, activated the spell? What if my love for Damon would linger like that of my mother and Elijah? And most importantly what if he loved me just as much if not a fraction of the way Elijah felt for my mother. If indeed we had connected on that level I didn't know what that meant for my present or my future.

"Damon," I say, my voice sounding tired and strained. The more I thought about what Elijah had said the more I knew I needed to get as far away from Damon as possible. Like always I had to push down my emotions and everything I was going through, their had been work to do. I was going through some issues, that were bigger then our past or future together. I had to get a grip, and figure out a way to release my mother and save my father from himself. I also needed to stop dwelling on a connection that may or may not have been established.

"Bonnie" he whispers touching her face.

Briefly he wonders if this is another dream, he has to make sure she is real, that she's here with him right now. He knows she talking but continues to ignore her while he listens to her heart beat, this isn't another dream, she is here right now in his arms. He had fallen asleep in the car and it was like he knew she needed him because immediately he had woken up the moment he heard her call...felt her distress, and knew that he needed to wake up to find her.

"What are you doing here?" I question looking over at him, as I'm finally standing upright with as much strength as I could muster. Though I couldn't really take all the credit since I'm leaning on him for support.

Wild blue eyes look her way as he holds on to her for dear life. It doesn't matter that she's trying to brush him off of her, or the fact that she looks semi pissed for him witnessing her breakdown. He wasn't going anywhere. "What are you doing?" he echoed, the same suspicious tone she had with him. Though he did notice how her green eyes that seemed so lifeless. His eyes trailed all over her, she looked sickly pale all of a sudden and her heart beat was raging. He pulls her closer to him, almost desperate and ignores the fact that she's suddenly gone stiff in his arms.

It was only now that he came face to face, did he realize how fragile, she had looked. He could even feel her distress as if it were his own. She was scared...terrified even and he wasn't sure if it had anything to do with Elijah or if it were due to being around him. He knew she was scared, of being around him...of letting her guard down in front of him- but she had to know he only wanted to help her...to save her. He'd never hurt her again.

"Bon" he called cautiously as if talking to a scared animal. He had never been overly cautious in his life, but now he was a worrier. He was sure his forehead was perhaps morphing into the one his brother had at this very moment.

She pushes out of his embrace with a well defined look he is used to. This is the I can take care of my damned self look. It was the same look that had driven him crazy years ago just as it was doing now. He hadn't seen this particular look since they had became Bonnie-Damon, Damon-Bonnie.

"Don't" I say holding up my hand and halting his words. Damon couldn't be here, he shouldn't be here- yet he was here."Just," I shook my head and bit my lip. I hated that I was getting so emotional! Now was not the time to start crying. "Don't because if you touch me..._if you touch me_," I whisper out. I didn't want to need _his help_, I didn't want anything from _him_!

I didn't get to finish my words because the moment I looked into his worried eyes, tears sprung from my own. I was a freaking mess. I broke down and felt him wrap two strong arms around me, as if I was a rag doll. I felt his hands in my hair as he slightly rocked me back and forth. I snuggled closer to him letting my eyes drift shut for only a moment. For a second I wished it could always be like this. I needed to get it together, I had to help save my mother and hope my father didn't find out I was betraying him.

"_Oh god_!" I said pulling away. I was really going to betray my father, but I had to do it. I couldn't let my mother stay kept in some hell because it wasn't right, everyone deserved to be free and be with the person they loved the most, and my mother was no different. I could only hope my father would forgive me, for going against him. I knew he loved my mother in his own way but keeping her locked away, slowing driving her insane wasn't the way- and it was my duty to make everything right...even if it meant betraying my father.

For his part this was the second time in which he was seriously scared. Bonnie kept shaking in his arms, and he was still trying to figure out if this was the doing of her mother, if Elijah had possible said something that had just triggered with her, or something else all together. With the way things were going it made him think back to the night when Ally contacted her. Bonnie liked to pretend that she was unbreakable but he knew the truth. She was just as broken as the next person if not far worse off. And he had contributed to that with all of his lies, deceit and the fact that he couldn't pull his head out of his ass in time to realize that she was the best thing that had happen to him.

It was almost poetic how now he was finally seeing everything clearer. He had been working on himself for the last couple months, so he could be a better person not just for her but for himself. The catalyst of it all had been his dream, it had told him everything he already knew but had shown the light on what he could have...what he would have.

Cupping her face he forced the beautiful girl to look at him. "Bon, please look at me...focus on me." he pleaded. Soon timid sad mint eyes met his. It was official the moment she looked at him he was dead, if he hadn't been dead the sad look in her eyes, the panicked look in her eyes had killed him. Seeing her like this, had reverted him back to human Damon, the same man that was afraid of his own shadow. He loved this girl, he loved her so much and he was going to save her from herself.

"Damon"

He ignored her words and linked his hands into hers. "No talking, just breathe, baby...just _breathe_" he said as if it were the end of discussion. They stood in silence as he tried not to freak out and she had calmed down a bit more. Her breathing was starting to get back to normal and finally her heartbeat was back to being music to his ears, instead of heavy drum beats. Looking down he caught eyes with her, and he knew that in that moment she was going to run. She had to keep her distance from him because whenever they were around each other, it was a constant reminder of what they had which was something beautiful and tragic at the same time.

I swallowed hard as our eyes met. Within a blink of an eye I saw and felt everything all the good times, the highs that came along with it and the bad times and extreme lows. Every touch had either reminded me of the good or the bad with Damon. This was the reason that no matter what, we could never really be together-it was too much!

Despite that, I allowed him to hold onto me, and me hold onto him. It appeared I'd just suffered from my first and hopefully last panic attack with Damon by my side. In the past, I had never wanted him to see me weak, in fact I had always made it a habit not to cry in front of him. The last time I had cried in front of him had been when we had officially let each other go, and I had been a sobbing mess. I couldn't do this with him, let him hold me like this. Because with Damon one thing always led to another. He had been my addiction the one thing I knew was bad for me and even moments like this was too close for comfort. It would ruin my rehabilitation.

After another moment of him holding me, I took a shaky step back from him."Um," I say pausing to run a slightly shaky hand through my long curly hair. I knew I must have looked like a jittery mess that was going through mood swings like a motherfucker, I was just trying to deal with everything and unfortunately it was rather emotional today. "Thanks for...thank you." I say not being able to form a complete sentence. That was what being close to him did to me. As our eyes meet he gives me a nod that tells me he knows what I'm trying to say, what I want to say which is thank you for holding me together but I can't seem to get the words out.

We're standing in front of each other in complete silence, peaceful silence that I know I need to disrupt because being around him for too long wasn't good for either one of us. I know I need to get away before something happens because something always happens and it can't happen, I wont let it happen.

I push away from him breaking the hug. "Thanks." I say sheepishly. I tug a wayward strand behind my ear, wanting to say something else, but I find myself at a lost for words. Once again I send him a curt nod as silent goodbye before I quickly turn on my heel. I had hoped to make a clean getaway but the moment I feel him against me, I know that my attempts are futile.

Silently I closed my eyes. I knew it wouldn't be that easy, nothing was ever easy. The mere feel of his body pressed against mine has my heart racing in what some may say is a good way, while I say it's a bad way. I just wanted to go home and pretend that everything was okay. I also wanted to try and put my fears aside and ask the only person I could think of who could actually keep their mouth shut for help, and asking Katherine of all people for help was big, especially for me.

"Oh no you don't." he says towering over he petite figure. Their was no way in hell he was going to let her out of his sight not after what he had just witnessed. He didn't care if he needed to follow her in human or bird form. He was going to be on her like a second fucking skin!

I inhaled sharply, before finally turning his way. I could tell by the tone of his voice, by the way his crystal eyes lit up that he wasn't going to let this one go. So I did the first thing that came to my mind, I played down everything. "I'm sorry about breaking down all over you." I say thoughtfully pausing. "I had a moment," I say looking off in the distance. "But its over now, and we should go back to our scheduled programing." I say nonchalantly as possible.

A bitter bubble of laughter escaped his mouth. "You gonna have to do better then that if you think you can get rid of me Princess." he says his lip curled up revealing his teeth."We not finished here." he says curtly.

I let out a sigh and rubbed my temples, it was a knee jerk reaction to what was to come."You wanna talk?" I ask crossing my arms in front of my chest. "How about we talk about how you've been following me." I say tapping my foot. Distraction was the key."I thought we agreed you were going to stop doing that." I say just as a car zooms past us.

Couldn't she tell, wasn't it obvious. He felt like it was written all over his face, it certainly appeared that way to him- he was in love with her, and if anything were to happen to her-truly happen to her; he knew their would be no saving him because he would lose his mind. All along he had thought Elena was suppose to save him, bring him back from the brink but it was all in his head. Bonnie was his salvation, she was the only good thing he had and he would do anything to protect her.

"If it weren't for me who knows who would've found you and what they would've done." he says his tone softening.

I lick my lips. "And I thanked you for that, thank you for coming to my rescue." I say honestly. When he comes near me I put my hand out to stop him, but continues to move forward till my hand is touching his chest. I try and remove my hand from him, when he holds onto it-holding onto me.

"Damon." I say my tone warning as I eye him. He's invading my space, invading my senses and I want him to just take a step back so I can breathe.

"Bonnie." he says with a same tone, brows furrowed, eyes so open and caring.

I squint his way which causes him to chuckle in response." I really need you to stop following me, its pissing off a lot of people and it makes you look needy and desperate." I say in that judgmental tone he hates so much. He had always said I thought I was better then him, of course we weren't screwing each other or together during that time, but I knew he believed it for a very long time.

He cracks a grin. "Good because that is exactly what I am when it comes to you." he says causing her mouth to hang agape. Soon he's invading her personal space again. He could play dirty when needed to and he would do anything to make sure that he was the man by her side.

I threw my hands up in the air, this was the reason I didn't want him holding me. "I don't have time for this, we both need to move on and just go our separate ways" I say stalking back to the car, its then that I notice the keys are missing and look over to see Damon sitting in the driver seat.

He growled loud with intense eyes. "I can go all day and night Bonnie, just try me." he says with a menacing grin. "I'm not letting your drive home in your condition." he says glaring down at her before grinning yet again. He knew that her patience was wearing thin, her arms were already crossed under her breast and she was leaning against the car with a chip on her shoulder, but at least she was still standing.

I knew he was right, that I probably shouldn't be driving now but it was killing me to accept his help because one thing always turned into another with him. I had promised Mason I would stay away from Damon and this was breaking the one thing he had asked of me. Looking up I caught the gazes with hauntingly blue eyes as just as he wiggled his brows flirtatiously. My face must have said the words my mouth didn't get a chance to say because soon he was talking again.

"I know your as sufficient as cat woman is on her own, you can take care of yourself- we all know that." he says looking over at her. "But even cat woman needed her dark knight once in a while." he says leaning over with a lop sided grin.

I sucked my teeth as the air between us popped with whatever it was that still resided between Damon and I. How dare he use my love for Cat woman and Batman against me, they were my otp! "Fine," I relented. "You can drive me home, but we're doing this by my rules.." I say looking out the window.

He rubbed his hands together. Let the games begin.

**BB-DS-BD**

The plan had been for Damon to take me home and for me to contact Katherine so that the two of us could play spies and go on a secret mission. What ended up happening was that I had fallen sleep either to exhaustion or because I was trying avoid Damon. Rubbing my eyes I was surprised to see that I was left alone in the car. However my reprieve was short, as Damon quickly descended on me by opening the door smirk in place.

"What are we doing here?" I asked clearly unimpressed with his methods.

"You'll see." He says reaching his hand out and pulling her swiftly to his chest. When their chest bump he sends her yet another smile. He used his other hand to easily wrap around her slender waist in case she needed any help and because he wanted to touch her.

"I thought you were taking me home?' I asked a pout on my lips.

He wanted to swoop in a kiss the pout away but refrain from doing so. She had fallen asleep for the short ride and a sleepy Bonnie was always fun to play with. It was when her innocense shown through the most. "In due time, let me take care of you." he says leaning forward and kissing her cheek before leading the way.

As soon as we enter the pub I see Gloria in her element serving drinks up and laughing with the customers. Damon tugs me in further while I want to suddenly drag my feet. I had adored Gloria in fact I had loved this place. We used to come here all the time because it wasn't the Mystic Grill and in the beginning when we were sneaking around.

"Bonnie Bennett let me get a good look at you." The older witch with arms outstretched. She quickly enveloped me into a hug. I find myself lingering for a few more seconds before the two of us pull back and compliment each other.

"What about me?" Damon asked with his arms outstretched.

Gloria and I shared a look before she speaks. "Your lucky you still cute Salvatore," she says with a wink. "And the fact that your brought Bonnie with you." she says looking over at me. "Now you two go find a seat get anything you want it's on me."

I watch as Gloria flutters off talking to customers and laughing of sorts before turning my eyes back to Damon who has a look I cant quite place on his face.

" Really, you brought me to Gloria's?" I ask as Damon escorts me to a seat by the window. He's got one hand on my lower back while we walk to our seat and if it weren't for the older couple who keeps smiling at the two of us I would've totally jerked away from him.

when we're finally seated away from the older couple I look over at Damon expedently. This was our place and for him to bring me here was either a low blow, or a chance to get at me when he thought my defenses were too long to fight off, us.

"When was the last time you ate?" he asked fingers clasped together while waiting patiently for her answer. She had loved this place and lucky for him it was on the way back to Mystic Falls.

"This morning." I say stiffly. "I'm not hungry." I say just as my stomach decided to growl. I can tell by the slow smile on his lips that he heard and roll my eyes.

As our eyes catch and we both try to contain our laughter I have a feeling that it's going to be a long day.

**BB-DS**

"What were you doing with Elijah Mikaelson?"

I licked my dry lips. Of course Damon knew about me going to see Elijah he knew everything, I guess that was what happened when you were a professional stalker. He should really find a hobby that didn't involve stalking people, or perhaps find a job-

"How do you know anything about Elijah?" I asked causing him to look my way with that I'm Damon Salvatore I know everything and everyone look.

He gave her a look as if debating how much he should divulge. The truth was he hadn't really known Elijah not the way he had presumed Bonnie had thought he knew him. A while back he had angered the original vampires sister by using her a coping mechanism to deal with his issues with Bonnie and Elena. He had dared to leave Rebekah high and dry and because of that faced the wrath of the Mikaelson brothers. After days of torture Elijah had simply walked into the house and ended the torturing session, which he had been thankful for.

"A while back me and his sister..." he started to say when she stopped him by putting her hand up.

"Say no more, I get it." I say nodding my head. "And let me guess you didn't learn anything from that situation now did you?" I ask already knowing the answer.

He hadn't learned his lesson not after Rebekah had chained him up and tortured him with a vervain soaked knife. The truth was that not a single person could teach him a lesson unless he was willing to learn from it and actually see the damage he had done. Rebekah was just another girl, another casualty who had fallen for him. What had woken him up was the look Bonnie had given him the night he had hurt her. That one look had told him he cared more then he had wanted to admit.

"I used her, when I fighting my feelings for you." he says simply. "And no I didn't learn after she kicked my ass, but I am learning now Bons." he says while placing his hand on her knee.

I swallowed hard and removed his hand from my knee. "What do you know about Elijah?" I asked carful not to appear too desperate. My mother had believed Elijah was her everything, and my first encounter with him outside of my dreams had been wonderful, I truly believed in everything he said, he loved my mother with all of his heart. But if Damon had known something or anything about Elijah I would like to know about it before I put all my trust into him.

He regarded her with a long look. They were playing Russian roulette right now. He wanted information and so did Bonnie. The only way they could both get what they desperately wanted was to confide in one another. "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours." he says suggestively with a half smile on the horizon.

I kept my heated gaze on him for a second too long before finally complying. "Of course sand box rules," I say shaking my head with a slight chuckle. "Fine." I say pushing my hair off my shoulder. "That night, my mother was going to see Elijah." I say calmly. "Their in love and have been since she was a teenager." I admit as my mind wonders to the words Elijah had said about soul mates epically that of witch and vampire. "My mother believes they are soulmates and Elijah agrees." I say finally looking away. "He's offered to help me in any capacity I need in order to free my mother." I say tilting my head to the side as if telling him it was now his turn to spill.

In all honesty he was shocked that Elijah was in love with someone that was female, but the way Bonnie had spoken about him and her mother, the love story that she seemed fascinated about he could believe it. However just as she was probably swooning over the love shared between the original and her mother, he could tell that something else was lurking, behind her eyes.

He studied her for a second longer before concluding that Bonnie like, always was thinking behind the love story at the bigger picture and that had included her father. "Grayson, you're worried about him." he concludes amazed by the girl-the woman in front of him. Grayson had literally treated his daughter like she was an after thought once Alexandria had finally decided to leave him. He couldn't even remember Grayson calling Bonnie not during the time they had been together and that had been a little over two years. The only time Grayson showed any kind of appreciation for his daughter had been on holidays and her birthday where he had usually sent something expensive followed by flowers. Grayson had never bothered to care about Bonnie yet here she was clearly worried and upset about betraying him.

My eyes snap up to meet his. I knew what he was thinking, why worry about my father when he never ever showed any kind of emotion toward me. In the back of my mind I wish I could be that girl, that girl who could just give up on people for my own sake and only worry about myself but I wasn't built like that. I could never really give up on someone, even if they deserved it.

"Of course I'm worried, he's my father, my family." I say picking at my lunch. "I cant just give up on him- you don't give up on the people you love." I say remembering that was the one thing my mother had always told me. "Besides it never ends well for people like us." I mumble more to myself then to him.

He narrowed ice blue eyes her way. "What's that suppose to mean Bon, am I missing something?"

"Come on Damon!" I say as if it is the most obvious thing in the world. I lower my voice as a waitress comes over and refills Damons glass with more alcohol. I watch as she flings her hair to one side trying to garner his attention never realizing that she isn't what he wants, its only when she stomps away do I shake my head with pity. Damon will only have eyes for his newest obsession and usually that is Elena, the poor girl didn't stand a chance. "Its means Elijah is a vampire, he waited his whole undead life to find true love, and he found that with my mother." I say swallowing quickly. "Do you really think he's going to just let my father off for keeping the two of them apart?" I whisper harshly.

He nods his head understanding where she's coming from now. He was the type of guy the believed in an eye for an eye, you hurt me you better be damned sure I'm gonna hurt you just as bad if not more. He knew if something had happen to her, if something bad had happen to her because all of this crap with her parents and now original Elijah- he wouldn't stop till every single mother fucker that put her in danger was truly dead and never coming back.

"You don't have to worry about Elijah." he says while stroking the soft part of her hand with his thumb. "He's actually a stand up kind of guy- its sickening really." he says with a frown marring handsome features. "Out of all us vampires, there are at least two that are still good despite everything." he says thinking of his brother and of course the ever truthful Elijah Mikaelson. "Of course one of those vampires is Elijah and the other is Stefan." he says causing her to smile just a bit and damn if he didn't want to kiss her perfect lips. Most people when they cried were hideous, Bonnie was still Bonnie, beautiful and unearthly.

His words kind and calming but he their was one thing he had forgotten and that was that fact that when you were in love, true love you'd do anything to protect the person you love from harm, and I was positive that once Elijah was reunited with my mother he'd only want to keep her safe.

I wiped at my eyes swatting away a tear. I was under so much stress that I was literally falling apart in public again. "You underestimate the power of love Damon." I say almost whimsically. My eyes traveled to the window where I spotted some kids I knew...kids, it was odd but being a witch had made me feel so much older then my actual age. But then I guess it came with the territory. I was the product of a Bennett witch and a Du Pres warlock, my life would never be simple.

Turning my eyes back to him I speak. "Love makes you do crazy things." I say still looking out the window. "It made you chase after Katherine for over a hundred years, only to fall for someone else with her face." I say pausing as our eyes locked.

"Bon" he says eyes darting all over her face.

I ignored his plea, I was simply making a point. "Love made Stefan forgive and later allow himself to fall in love with Katherine all over again." I say with a heavy sigh. I opened my mouth to speak further but thought against it. "Love is the reason I gave you so many chances." I say casting my eyes down as yet another waitress came over probably to ogle Damon. I took this chance to get my thoughts together. I had half the nerve to ask him if he had known anything about the repercussions of a witch falling in love with a vampire and vice versa. But I knew that would really get me nowhere, everything always seemed to come back to the to of us.

The air between the two of them was thick full of tension. It was obvious to him that his betrayal had still effected her, even though she had "moved on" and "forgave him" their was still a big part of her that was still effected despite everything that came out of her mouth. She wasn't over it, which meant she wasn't over him.

He lent forward inhaling her aroma. "We can both agree that love makes you do crazy things." he says agreeing with her assessment. "Your worried about your father, about Grayson because you love him despite knowing that he is the bad guy in your mothers fairy tale." he says with a pause. He wants to further speak about how he is probably the bad guy in her fairy tale with Mason but decides against it, because in his eyes Mason was the interloper not him. "Listen to me, as much as you love your father you still need to take care of yourself." he says in a tone that meant business. Bonnie wasn't naive nor was she some sort of damsel waiting to be saved, but she was someone who was a bleeding heart and that heart had always gotten her in trouble. "You have to remember that he's a man obsessed. Never underestimate a man in love, or a man obsessed." he says now looking away out the window.

I felt something in me soften at the way his voice sounded so soothing so caring. "Are you trying to scare me out of helping my mother?" I ask my voice sounding small.

"No." he says vehemently shaking his head. "I'm trying to save you from heartache, and protect you from what's to come." he says pausing yet again. What was it with him and not being able to complete he sentences with her looking at him like that. She looked every much of the little girl that she was. He may have been a hundred and forty some odd years but never in his life had he ever met anyone like Bonnie Bennett, she was practically a baby and was teaching him things about loyalty.

I said a mere "oh" as we drifted into silence again. Around us people were buzzing around yet me and Damon were quiet as a summer breeze. For the first time in a long time I wondered where this man had been while we were together? I let out a snort at my musing and chanced a look his way to see he was already looking my way with expressive electric eyes. It was almost as if he could sense my morbid thoughts.

"What?" he asked noticing for the first time the way she was looking at him. For the first time since they had sat down at the diner she was looking at him almost fondly, like she couldn't believe the words he was saying or that she was simply amazed by him. And he wanted to capture this moment, steal it and tick in the back of his mind so that he could remember that this was what he was fighting for...what he would fight for. Emily had shown him his family, the family that he and Bonnie had created, along with their little girl Aria! He wanted that, he wanted his family which included his brother Stefan and even Katherine- and he'd do anything to get it.

I shook my head as if to stop myself for further showing my cards with him. Damon had caught me off guard, being so open. This was the Damon that normally the world didn't see because he had kept him hidden from everyone, this was the Damon who held me in his arms tightly after we... I took a sip of my drink and peered up to see hypnotizing electric blue eyes looking at me.

"It shouldn't be like this." I say with a sigh. "It shouldn't be this easy with you." I say causing him to quirk his lips to the side before a slow grin appears that nearly had my heart dancing to the Damon Salvatore drum. "Why couldn't you be like this when I was in love with you?" I blurt out, clamping my mouth shut once the words tumble out of my mouth.

He looks down and taps the table as lightly as possible. He had asked himself that question, a million of questions as to why he could never give himself all to Bonnie when all she wanted was him. Since they had broken up, it was all he had asked himself, along with wether or not Bonnie could love him like she did before?

Clearing his throat he looked up at her, hoping for once his eyes had spoken the truth and shown his sincerity. "Because" he begins while twirling his day walking ring around nervous which never happens. It was always easier for him to bare his soul while drunk, right now he was stone cold sober and this was difficult for him, but he knew Bonnie needed it. He could never give her what she wanted in the past and that was why they didn't work, he always gave her half of him, but right now in this moment he was in it 100%.

"Because." he says with a sigh as his long lashes flare down as his eyes look at everything that isn't the beautiful girl in front of him. "I - I was caught up." he says as his the tone of his voice changes from that of his typical tone, to that of anguish. "I was so caught up in wanting it all, you and _the idea of her_- that I let my obsession rule me, it fueled me." he says candidly. " I couldn't give you all of me because I was saving a big part for her." he says as she takes a deep breath. He wont look at her afraid of what he'll see. He practically had to drag her here and for every move he made in the right direction he knew that she were moving in the opposite direction.

"Why now?" I ask suddenly. "Why is it so easy for you to just talk to me?" I ask interrupting the silence that had blanketed the two of us like snow covering the ground in winter. "Why is it easy for me to talk to you?"

He wanted to tell her because the stars were finally aligning in his favor but instead shrugged his shoulders and mumbled something about them being wiser which he was wiser but not by much.

I ran my hand over my face. This could not be happening. Why now, why when I had so much shit on my plate, did Damon and I have to have the heart to hearts of all fucking heart to hearts?

"I shouldn't be taking a walk down memory lane with you, I shouldn't even be confiding in you my feelings yet," pause deep breath. "Here I am." I admit pushing my half eaten bacon cheeseburger away from me. I was getting caught up in the lure that was Damon Salvatore.

He resisted the urge to get angry and throw out something nasty. Now was not the time to let his pride get in the way. "Why is it such a crime to confide in me?" he questioned carefully. She had her guard down and the last thing he wanted was for the walls to come back up.

"We work good together Bons, we always have." he says wanting to reach out and touch her yet he refrains from doing so. She's venerable and raw. Normally he would've jumped at the chance to take advantage of everything that was going on in her life that went beyond him, beyond her knight in shining armor as well, but he was thinking about the future. When he had her again, and he would have her he wanted last as long as possible.

I shook my head, he didn't get it! "That's not that point, your neither my boyfriend nor my bestfriend." I say regretting my words as soon as they've left my mouth. Damon had been right we were a good team together but we couldn't be that anymore.

He cocked his head to the side and rubbed his hand along his jaw and neck area in a habit that happen whenever he was annoyed. His foot tapped up and down as he drummed his fingers all the while trying to push down the swirling feelings inside of him, some were hurt, others were angry, and most of confusion. Of course Bonnie would bring Mason and Stefan into the equation. She was after all one of the most, if not loyalist person he knew next to his brother. But what she had failed to notice was that her confiding in him, though it had taken some time, had come natural. Despite everything, she still trusted him with her deepest secretes- with her feelings and that was a step in the right direction, even if she didn't see it.

"Well" he says catching her attention as he licks his lips. "It seems the men in your life seem to be on a play date." he says trailing off bitterly. "So it looks like I'm your best bet." He wasn't going to lie, he hated that idea that Stefan and Mason were becoming fast bffs. He hated that Mason fucking Lockwood had not only gotten the girl, his girl but had managed to get his brother as well.

I flinched at his words, feeling as if he had cut my with his razor sharped tongue. I could easily remember him saying something vaguely similar to me that first night, and many nights after it. The nights when I would creep out of his bed just before daybreak. Everytime I left his bed and trailed back to my own in the Salvatore home, he'd whisper that whenever I stopped running I'd realize he was all I had, and all I'd ever have on the connection level, well aside from Stefan.

I let out a scoff as my mossy green eyes squint in his direction. Immediately I'm to my feet ready to leave him. I'd rather have to deal with Stefan and questioning looks then to have to deal with Damon one more minute. "You know what, it's been real-thanks for coming to my rescue but I'm going to do what I should've done before and that's call Stefan." I say with a hard glare

He lent back and watched her as anger had shown on her features. "Go ahead and run, it's what your good at." he snapped back. She had hurt him, now it was his turn...old habits die hard. "It's wonderful to see that its ok for you to hurt my feelings but the minute I say something to upset you- you're ready to run and call Stefan." he says with a snort. Some things never did change, she was still running to Stefan just like always.

As soon as I heard his words I stiffly turned to face him. I was not going to run away- I wasn't that girl. "What do you want Damon?" I ask while trying to figure out how this conversation went from being actually kind of nice to this-this mess that we were accustomed to?

He ran his hand through his hazardous hair. Bonnie may have thought that this was easy for him, but it was furthest from the truth. In all honesty he was counting down the seconds when she really did just up and call Stefan because he knew that was what she really wanted to do. She hated that he had seen her so vulnerable. And to make matters worst when things got really bad between the two of them she was always the first one to run- she was a runner especially when it came to him. He could easily remember how much fighting they had done with themselves to stay away from each other, especially in the beginning-but they couldn't fight it, he couldn't get her out of his system and she had been the same way.

"You may think that I'm made of titanium...maybe I am." he says wiping his hand along his chin as he looks up to dangerous green eyes. He knows Gloria is watching, waiting for probably an epic war to happen right in front of her eyes, but he has no plans to fight with Bonnie. "But the one thing I do feel is you." he says harshly. It was true he could sense her. It was like she was plucking at his insides calling out to him, and her emotions were slamming into him. "Its like every part of me is frozen.." he says his eyes stretched, his teeth gritted together. "But then their's you." he says while pointing to where his dead heart lye.

Seconds turned into minutes as silence had fallen like rain drops.

He pushed the a drink in front of Bonnie urging her to drink up and she did so, still in complete silence. He too did the same and let out a sound once the burning liquid had gone down his throat. "Its like- I can feel you when your sad, or scared, when your worried," he says pausing momentarily. "I can feel you all the time." he whispers out his tone wavering as he runs a hand through his hair yet again. She was driving him insane without even knowing it. When they were away from each other he felt phantom pains in his chest. Like his heart was breaking. But when the were together, he felt at peace.

Looking up I caught electric blue gaze and for the first time since his admission I noticed the pure emotion in his eyes and on his face. Usually Damon was better at hiding his emotions. Today it seemed like every word he spoke, made he look older, frailer as if his emotions were truly beginning to take a toll on him.

Instinctively I reached out and touched his hand. I couldn't feel him, not the way he had claimed to feel me-but if he had really been able to feel me, then I wondered if he was just as tortured as Elijah had been without my mother. Though I could recall the original vampire being poised it was in his eyes the grief that was slowly chipping away at him. If Damon could indeed feel me that must have meant that we had indeed bonded in the supernatural world, which meant our hearts would forever be intertwined. No, this-this couldn't be I had Mason!

"Bonnie." he calls knowing she's about to run.

I closed my eyes tighter. What the hell were we going to do about this situation? I didn't even know how we could sever the bond- let alone if this was real or if it had been something else entirely.

I let out a gasp."You were right I can't deal with this right now." I say in a hushed tone.

"Neither can I." he whispers angrily through thinned lips. "I feel you when your with him. The way he makes you feel." he says pained by the mere thought. He had been getting better at blocking out her feelings but he could still sense it. "And sometimes I wonder..." he licks his dry lips and looks up to see that she's still not meeting his eyes. "_Look at me." _hesays his tone still fragile and broken. "It's like you want me to know he makes your heart feel safe."

"What did you just say?" I asked again. When he gave me a look that was filled with fury I knew he had said what I was hoping against. "How did you?" I stopped short. Their had to be another explanation, Damon and I soulmates maybe he did something, maybe he got a witch to put a spell on him?

I ran my hand through my hair and nibbled on my lip. I honestly didn't know what to think. If he had done this to himself, to make me feel guilty about moving on, I don't know what I would do. But if he hadn't done this, if this had been because we were destined to be together then...well then our worlds would be turned upside down.

"This can't be happening." I mutter to myself though I know he's heard it. Now more then ever I'm determined to learn about the true lovers spell, curse whatever Elijah was talking about. I had a life that I was happy with, and I didn't want to lose it.

"I didn't do this Bon." he says breaking the long and chilled filled silence that had gathered around the two of them. "You think I want to feel that your falling for that...that wolf.' he says bitter as hell and repulsed by his own words. Words that he had known to be true.

I kept quiet not knowing what to say, what could I possibly say to that...nothing.

He leans forward. "Do you wanna know what it feels like- it feels like my insides are being scraped out." he asked not waiting for her to reply. That's how it felt when she wanted someone else, when she wanted the wolf. But when she wanted him, she called out to him the feeling was undescribable. "And when you did need me- its like you call out to me." he said as blue eyes looked down as if he was collecting his thoughts. "I feel your need for me, and that was why showed up today because you needed me."

I pierce my lips together momentarily as I'm literally a loss for words. My nerves are rattled and for the first time in a long time I honestly don't know what to say or do. But then again I guess that had always been the case especially when it came to me and Damon.

"you don't have to continue," I say pausing to nibble on my lip. "I believe you didn't do this." I say slowly.

To say he was shocked was an understatement. "Why?" he says cocking his head to one side. "Minutes ago you were accusing me of doing all kinds of shit to get you back and now suddenly you believe me?" He questioned eyes blazing.

I let out a sigh and once again ran my hands through my hair. I wouldn't dare tell him about the tale of two hearts, at least not till I had learned more about it myself. "Your in pain I can see it in your eyes." I say leaning against the table. "And as horrible as you can be-you wouldn't lie about matters of the heart." I say looking away from him.

He nods but says nothing. Then licks his teeth. "Is that your way of giving me a backwards compliment?" he asked smirk in place.

"Take it however you want it." I say causing him to grin. I raised my brows up at him. I was trying to calm down because I wasn't sure how him feeling me, and my emotions or whatever was connected with. But I did know one person that I was positive who could shed light on everything I knew she would love to help if not to be nosey.

"I'm glad you believe me-it means a lot." he says while suddenly taking her hand and placing a gentle kiss to it.

At the sudden close proximity I start to feel nervous. I can feel my heart beating out of my chest and the way he looks at me causes goose bumps to break out on my skin. We were too close for comfort. "Can you read my mind?" I ask suddenly.

"No. I cant read your mind." he says smiling as she began to calm down just a bit more. He ran his thumb on the sensitive part of her wrist and smiled to himself when she finally calmed down. It was a trick he had used many times to get her settled after a long night of fighting each other or bad guys.

I let out a sigh of relief. The last thing I needed was Damon tinkering around in my head. "How did this happen?" I ask more to myself then to him.

"I don't know." Came his strangled reply. He had first thought it was because they had shared so much blood while they were together, it had certainly been the reason they had been able to speak telepathically to each other. And if that hadn't been the reason, he could always blame it on her being a Bennett witch. He was supposed to protect her, and her family and what they had fallen in-to together had blurred the lines much more. She was in his veins, he knew that and he was in hers.

Chancing in look in her direction he spoke again. "What if it had something to do with that last night together."

I turned his way and looked at him puzzled. "That night should've ended everything." I say a hand in my hair.

"Ok." he say letting out a breath. "What about that last week." he says as his gums itch at the mere thought of that week. It wasn't just about the sex either, because it had always been rather explosive. That week, it had been so much more-everything had been much more intense. He wasn't running from his feelings and Bonnie...she wasn't hiding from hers either. "We shared a lot of blood and..."

I stopped him with a single glance. Damon didn't have to remind me about that week. Their was no need for further elaboration. That lone week, I had never felt more connected with him. We were happy, and I never really got to be happy...not for too long.

I refuse to let my mind wander and instead look outside the window yet again. Soon though I feel his breath in my ear.

"We were happy...you know."

I turned to look at him about to ask him whose fault it was that we didn't get our happily after ever, or at least our damn happy for Bonnie and Damon. When I opened my mouth he swiftly put his finger to my lips.

"I can remember you looking at me, with so much love." he pauses as she shakes her head telling him to stop but he continues. "I almost told you...but then you know" he says embarrassed by the turn events in the past and in the present.

I shook my head again at him. "I don't think we need to further discuss this." I say feeling my emotions begin to get muddled. "I think its time you take me home." I say eagerly. "Now." I say waiting for him to get up.

"Not yet." he says pinning her with steel eyes. "Not till I've told you everything."

I lick my lips and cross my arms in front of my chest. "Can you tell me from across the table?"

"I want to help you, to take care of you because I didn't realize how much you meant to me till we broke up. I left town to get away from your memory but you were there in my dreams, talking to me stealing moments of times when I could've and should've been doing very bad things." he says with a chuckle. "I cant run away from you because you're the only thing that melts the ice around my heart."

Stiffly I spoke. "That's enough Damon."

"No it isn't. I want to protect you because your in my veins!" he was surprised when she through him a wild look over her shoulder. " And I know you feel the same, or else you wouldn't feel comfortable confiding in me about your father or Elijah. So give me one good reason why it's so bad that I want to help you and that you want me to."

I slam my hand on the table. "Because your you and I'm me!" I say as his blue eyes shine with hurt. "Its never going to change. We're always going to be Bonnie and Damon." I say suddenly needing air and fleeing the confinement of the pub.

**DS-DS-DS**

He watched as she ran off and cursed. He knew what she was going through. He knew that he shouldn't have pushed but that was who he was, he was pushy and he overstepped boundaries. It was being close to her- thinking about that last week together. He wanted more- he always wanted more from Bonnie Bennett and he always would.

Picking up his glass he drains the liquid and isn't surprised by the copper woman who sits in front of him Gloria. "Really Glow, eavesdropping isnt nice." he says with a smirk. He places his hands on the table. "By the look on your face I can tell you've got something to say- so out with it."

Gloria smiled and poured her old friend a shot of bourbon. "You know you really should listen to me more." she says drinking from her own shot glass. "You push her, sometimes to hard." she says simply.

He tilts his head back and chuckles. "Any other girl would be dying to pushed by me, they'd be on their hands and knees doing whatever I asked to do. But with Bonnie," he says pausing to look out the window at the girl in question.

"You broke her heart." Gloria finished. "Listen I couldn't help but overhear- is it true that you can feel when she's in distress?"

He tore his eyes from the window. "Yup" he says letting the p linger. "I can feel her emotions or whatever, I know when she needs me and when she wants me to stay away." pause "She's scared about a lot of things and I just screwed this up." he says with another chuckle. "I feel her all the time Glow, its almost as if she's imbedded in my,"

"Heart" Gloria supplies causing thick brows to wiggle. "You feel all matters of her heart correct?" she asked knowingly.

"Yeah."

She smiles. "Damon have you ever heard of the tale of the witch and the vampire?"

He smirks. "Is this a joke because-"

"Listen, according to legend when a witch and vampire fall in love, true love, their hearts connect and intertwine." she says as he gives her skeptical look. "Two hearts of two people to supernaturals in love one witch, one vampire link them forever together."

When Gloria walks away it takes him ten minutes to let everything sink in. Turning his head once again he catches sight of Bonnie she's on the phone probably talking to Stefan or Mason, uh or Caroline. He watches as she smiles into the phone and finds himself smiling back. If the tale Gloria had said was true then he was on his way.

Spoilers- batherine, bamon, defan and statherine!


	17. Chapter 16

A.N. Hey all! I hope you're all having a wonderful new year! After so long I'm finally back with the newest chapter! I hope you all enjoyed it. I wanted Damon and Bonnie to spend a bit more time alone together so hopefully you all enjoyed it

special thanks to: guest, guest, aprilf00l, Brazilianfan, jewelsstars, and jordanjanellejoy

xoxo queena

"_It's just a spark, but its enough to keep me going_"

_Paramore_

**Chapter 16: Part 1: Flaws and All**

If my life were a movie the very moment Damon had confessed to still loving me, to loving me in general, I would've run into his arms and declared that I loved him too...that I had never stopped loving him and never could. If this were a movie, hearing the man I had loved so deeply confess that he had felt me, inside of his veins, inside of dead heart would only further prove to me that Damon was the guy for me, he always would. I would ignore all the hurt and pain he had brought my way, I would forget about the fact that he slept with my best friend and wrote it off and most importantly I would forget how with him although I truly did love him, my time with him had been some of the happiest times and the saddest times of my life.

If this had been a movie Damon and I would get back together and everything would be forgotten because he finally loved me, and I had always loved him...but this wasn't a movie...this was a real life and I had moved on.

For the longest time I was resigned to notion that being in love with someone meant that you had to fight for them, that no matter how bad it got, at the end of the tunnel light would always shine through. I had become a girl I had never wanted to be, so dependent on a guy that when we split-it was like I had shattered to pieces. And then Mason had come and he reminded me of the strength I had buried within myself for Damon. I had a chance to be really happy, to change the way my story, the story of every other girl just like me had been given and I couldn't...I wouldn't give that up. I could have my happy ending and I'd fight to tooth and nail to get it.

Like everything in my life I figured this wouldn't be easy but nothing was ever truly easy, so let the fuckery begin.

The Bonnie diaries.

BB-DS-BB

Silence had wrapped around the two of us like a blanket, on a cold day. The air between the two of us was filled with tension and a coldness that had goose bumps forming on my arms. We were fire and ice and normally any kind of tension would settle somewhere in the middle but right now, the cold that I was feeling was pure Damon. I knew he was hurt, and I also knew that the right thing to do would be to at least try and engage him but for the life of me I couldn't do that, because I knew what would happen, he'd pull me under like he always did.

Being around Damon like this, so close in quarters, it wasn't good for me. It reminded me of every moment shared. The mere smell of him had my mind reaching back to a time when I wanted nothing and everything to do with him. It made me restless. He made me restless. His declaration hadn't been far from my thoughts, even when I tried to forget about it. I couldn't shake the words that Damon had breathed to me, and I felt like he was all over me, like I was submerged in this Damon abyss and I wanted nothing to do with it...with him...not in that way.

The car ride back to Mystic Falls was met with tension that was so tangible, so stifling that I knew that if we didn't address _it_ soon the fall out would be greater then the argument we had earlier. Even with music acting a barrier, I could feel it all, that familiar feeling I had what seemed like so long ago. And I knew he could feel it too and it wasn't just because we had formed some kind of link, because what was radiating off of him was so vibrant, so bright that I couldn't ignore even if I wanted to...and I really wanted to ignore it.

My foot bounces up and down as I try to calm myself down just a bit. Out of the corner of my eye I catch sight of Damon. He's looking straight ahead though his hands are clenched at the wheel. He hasn't dared to say a word to me since he had walked in on the tail end of my conversation with Mason. Even when Gloria had come out to hug me goodbye and wish us well on our trip back home, he still wouldn't look at me. I had watched him though, through hooded eyes of course. The only time he seemed to pep up or at least show an inking of a smile was when Gloria had reminded us that everything took time.

"_Try not to be a stranger you two." Gloria had said hugging me. "And remember that time is all anyone needs" was the last words she had said before we departed. That of course had been the last words spoken since we had gotten in the car and started our trek back home and we hadn't even shared it._

Silently I turn away from him and look at the window. Damon isn't stupid he knows I've been watching him and still continues to ignore me. I know what I had said was harsh but he didn't get it, he didn't understand because right now I was the person he wanted, but what about what I wanted? That was the problem with Damon, he never thought about what was best for me, it was always about him.

The car suddenly jerks to a stop causing me to glare over to the vampire who just shrugs in reply. It appears we're stuck in traffic. Great, just what we all needed. I don't know how long the two of us are going to last, not with this energy.

"Damon" I say causing him to continue to ignore me. I rolled my eyes and stiffly sat in my seat face looking out the window. I couldn't look at him, not now because my heart was beating too fast due to the fact that I was stuck in a freaking car with him, I was still upset about everything and then in the back of my head was a tiny voice kept whispering questions about wether or not Damon was my Elijah, and I was his Alexandria. What if history was bound to repeat itself, and I found myself in a similar situation just as my mother had found herself, in love with two men, a vampire who was the love of her life and warlock who was one of her great loves but not the person her heart belonged to.

Drumming his fingers on the steering wheel and blowing a bubble he finally tossed a look in her direction. "You've been staring at me since we left Glows." He says matter of fact. "Some would say gawking even" he says glancing her way. "Gotta problem?" he asked with a raised brow.

I let out a sigh. "No problem at all." I say looking at him. His intense eyes are filled with mischief.

"Good" He says with ease. "Because you don't get to be mad at me!" he finally burst. When she looked his way he knew it had worked. He had successfully gotten a reaction out of her and that was what he wanted because she wasn't the only person that was going through shit! He had just found out that their hearts were connected and now he had to navigate through knowing she was going to do any and everything to stay with that damn wolf!

My mouth hung open before I quickly recovered. "I'm not mad...at you." I say carefully. I wasn't mad at Damon, I was freaking frustrated by the situation but I wasn't mad at him. He saved me.

He could admit he was mad at her. She had just walked away after he had bared his soul to her in public at that. As angry as he was with her though- one thing stuck out in his mind. She hadn't told Mason about her panic attack or anything. If Mason was suppose to be this guy she could lean on, someone she could trust someone she said had made her heart feel safe why was she keeping secrets?

"Good because you don't get to be mad, I do." He says pausing. "I had to sit there and listen to your disgusting conversation with wolfy!"

I slanted my eyes his way. "No one told you to listen." I say causing him to blink my way.

"Vampire Bon-its part of the perks baby." He says his voice sounding rougher. "You remember the perks" he watches as heat rushes to her face and hears her blood bumping. The two of them in close quarters like this, laced with tension is probably what they need. She wouldn't dare walk out in the middle of traffic. They were always much better when it was skin to skin contact. Talking had always gotten in the way of everything, he said that wrong thing, she reacted dramatically. But when they were alone and naked everything was always better...clearer.

I licked my lips. Damon would always be Damon, he thought he was slick, but really he was transparent. Seduction had always worked for him...for us in the past but it wouldn't work anymore. He didn't have a hold on me, not like before.

I said nothing for the longest time, but licked my lips against my better judgement. "Stop trying to seduce me." I say my eyes meeting his. The only person who possibly knew Damon Salvatore better then Stefan was probably me and I knew the ends and outs of his twisted mind.

He laughed at that. If he were trying to seduce her, really seduce her should be naked as the day she was born. In the back seat of the car with her lips wrapped so tight around him.

Clicking his tongue, he decided now was the perfect time to change the subject. Everyone had made a point to tell him that Mason was so much better for Bonnie. That she was so much happier because she was in a healthy relationship but he had heard Bonnie talking to said boyfriend and she had left out something monumental. "You didn't tell him." He says startling her.

I licked my lips. In all honesty I hadn't planned on telling Mason or anyone else about the panic attack. It was a one time thing, due to the fact that I was extremely stressed out. I had gotten a hold of myself now, so I saw no point in telling anyone about it. In fact if Damon hadn't witnessed the incident first hand, he wouldn't know anything about it or other things. I let my guard down- it slipped the moment I had been wrapped in his arms but I was okay now and so was everything else...ok maybe not everything else.

When I felt piercing blue eyes still on me, finally I looked his way a sigh slipping from my lips. "Not that it's any of your business," I say looking at him pointedly. "But Mason has a lot going on right now and I- I didn't want to add to his stress." I admit. It was all true Mason was going through some crazy pack shit right now and the last thing he needed to worry about was me, when I was perfectly fine.

He raised his brows. Bonnie had gone on and on about how Mason was the perfect boyfriend. How he had made her heart feel safe and all kinds of shit but she still chose to keep him in the dark. What did that really say about her perfect relationship? "Don't you get it Bonnie? Nothing else should matter but you." He says it like he's speaking to a small child. "He's supposed to be your boyfriend, the same guy you claim is so much better for you then me" he says the last part bitterly. " Yet you can't even tell him about this? Or trust him to put you ahead of his issues?" he further lamented. He had spent forever listening to her list the millions and millions of reasons why Mason had been better for her, why the two of them could never work, even though he knew better. Yet she couldn't bother informing Mason of what was going on with her?

"Really?" I said side eyeing him. Was he going to seriously try and talk shit when the majority of our relationship the one thing that consumed him was the thought of getting between the doppelganger thighs?

"Really." He says as his hand runs down her cheek. When she quickly slaps his hand away, he pulls it back but continues to look at her fondly. She was up to something. Something big he could smell it.

I shake my head and chuckle humorlessly."You know what I seem to remember that when we were together I was lucky to be tenth on your very long list of priorities that consisted of you and Elena." I turned around to really look at him. "Hell I was lucky to even be acknowledged for anything more then sex." I remind him. He didn't get to judge me or my relationship especially since he had been a shitty boyfriend! I had been lucky if I had even gotten on his list of priorities and that was mostly because Elena was off playing coy and aloof and busy. Yeah still bitter.

He sucked his white teeth and leant forwards. "Maybe, I wasn't ready back then." He says his tone suddenly changing. " I was, still consumed with all things me."

I chuckled. "That was months ago." I reminded him. "And as for your maturity level you're nearly a 200-year old vampire." I reminded him. I knew where this was going and I knew I needed to stop it, to nip it in the bud yet I just continued to look his way expectantly.

He shrugged his shoulders. "I wasn't ready for you then." He admitted carefully. "But I am ready for you now." He says leaning yet again. He had already unbuckled the seat belt so he could get closer, but he wanted to be much closer.

I locked eyes with him for a few seconds longer before turning to look at the scenery. Two seconds later I felt his icy fingertips of my chin. My eyes close on their own accord. One touch from him was all that was needed to start the slow burn that always came with being touched, or near him.

"And that's what terrifies you." He says all to knowing. His talk with Gloria had given him the pep talk he needed. Despite popular belief Bonnie Bennett had been one of those girls who could shatter even his confidence. "You know that when I say I'm ready for the two us I mean it." He murmurs studying her closely. He can see and hear everything about her now. It's like before he had been blinded but right now, he can see her and only her. Her eyes are darker, perhaps the color of the forest floor because he's gotten to her.

I was tempted to tilt my head up in that defying way and call him out on bullshit, but we both knew I couldn't. I wasn't mad at Damon, irritated yes but not mad. As our eyes locked I hoped he didn't see it but I knew he did- it was the reason he called me on my bull. I was afraid of him, I was afraid of myself and what we had and how that could change what I was holding onto for dear life, which was Mason and my happiness with him.

When he raises his brows silently speaking to me, I answer. "Stop" I say quietly.

"What we have-wont go away even if you want it to." He declares fiercely. He could see the doubt in her eyes, the way the walls she had been building up around herself since he had found her so vulnerable

"Stop doing that okay-just.." I couldn't even finish my sentence. I didn't trust what could or would come out of my mouth so I shut it immediately. I knew what I needed to tell Damon, in fact I thought I had made myself perfectly clear but apparently my words had fallen on deaf ears. Damon had this power over me- that was still so vibrant and raw even after all this time apart. Being with him had been my first adult relationship( though some may question him as an adult), my first heartbreak, my first taste of _love_. Some even thought he was my soulmate. That of course didn't mean we could be together-that I could let him back into my heart.

When he made a move to touch my leg I could've jumped in the back seat. I looked his way and shook my head. "Don't." I say effectively ending whatever that had passed through the two of us.

Once again we're blanketed in silence as the traffic had finally decided to let up. Silently we rode together with his eyes on the road and mine outside the window. It wasn't till familiar song from phone broke through the silence that I realized I had a phone call. Immediately I perked up, that was my ringtone for Stefan which meant he was calling and I couldn't talk to him- not now not while Damon was sitting next to me!

"It's Stefan." I say frantically as I just about toss my cell phone onto the floor. Startled I look to Damon who is wearing a "duh" face. "What should I do?" I ask not giving him time to talk. "I can't ignore it, I never ignore his phone calls plus he's with Mason which means he knows I have my phone." I say all in one breath. Damon is looking at me with an amused expression marring his features but still he says nothing.

"But" I say pausing to bite on my lip. "If he talks to me, he'll know something's up." I exclaimed helplessly. I was a horrible liar especially when it came to Stefan. He was my best friend, he knew everything...and I meant _everything_.

For his part he watched as she basically bit at her nails when really everyone knew she was going to pick up the phone. He also knew that Stefan would not stop calling till he got a hold of Bonnie and that was a fact. Ice blue eyes roll on the accord of the cutesy ring tone that was especially for his baby brother. Of course the song was a testament to their friendship that was going to last forever and ever. Everyone knew the story Bonnie and Stefan best friends 4ever.

"Answer it!" he says gruffly and when she looks at him like he's lost his mind, he nearly snarls her way. "If you don't, I will and we can all imagine what will happen if I do that." He says as he imagines exactly what would happen. His brother would get yet another brooding line on his forehead and probably go ape shit! He didn't care though, all was fair in love.

Slowly I nod my head as if I need his permission which I don't, but somehow it made me feel better. "B.F. what do I owe the pleasure of this call especially since you guys kicked me out to boy bond?" I ask gleefully into the phone.

A gruff chuckle is heard. "We're on an official break." Stefan says.

I couldn't help as a giggle escaped my mouth. "Nice! So let me get this straight since your done bonding with the boys you decide to call little ole me?" I ask gaining a chuckle yet again. "I'm game! What's up?"

"I was about to ask you the same thing. I heard you talking to Mason and you sounded... stressed." Stefan concluded.

"Stefan Salvatore the eavesdropper I never would've guessed." I say jokingly.

He chuckled. "That is super sonic hearing for you Bons, you don't wanna all the things I've heard from you."

I frowned. "Don't be a creeper Stefan." I deadpann.

"Hey are you ok, jokes aside, you sound...stressed?" he deduced.

I click my tongue forgetting I'm with Damon who is listening. "Why does everyone keep asking me that, I'm not a fragile little doll, you are aware of that right?" I ask picturing the smile that I knew I was gracing my best friends face.

"Because I love you- and you'll always be my little glass doll." Stefan says pausing. "As for Mason- I think we both know how he feels about you." He says his tone changing.

I bite my lip. The last thing I wanted to do was rub my relationship in Damons face but their were things I wanted to know about Mason...things that only Stefan could tell me. "How is he?" I say quietly even though Damon can hear every word we've uttered. I've already turned on the radio loud enough to try and muffle some of our words but I know Damon is listening to everything.

Breath. "He's gotta do a lot in the next couple hours and even more in the days coming. And he's worried about you...as I am" Stefan admits.

I rolled my eyes! Between Stefan and Mason I wasn't sure who worried more. "He should be focusing on his pack, not me." I mumble into the phone.

"You're a priority Bons,"

"Stop it your making me blush." I say playfully. I look over to the side and see that Damon is trying to speed up the conversation, he's telling me to wrap it up but I can't, not with Stefan.

"It's obvious that you can't take the heat of the attention being on you so I'll let you out of misery. I met the infamous Jules today."

Poor Stefan. I had met Jules and she wasn't the best person to be around ever. "Isn't she..." I wanted to call her a raving bitch but decided not to.

"Great!" Stefan supplies causing us both to laugh. "Well it seems your not the only person she hates because she tried to attack me."

The car jerks to a stop causing me to look over at Damon who has wide angry eyes. He may have been a shitty boyfriend and even worst brother but the one thing he didn't play with was someone hurting his brother. "What?" I asked still looking at Damon.

"Calm down," Stefan says calmly. "She thinks vampires are behind the recent attack and disappearance on the pack."

It was one thing for Jules to harbor some kind of hate for me. She didn't think I was good enough for her best friend, I understood that but for her to even dare to hate on Stefan was pushing the envelop too far for my liking. "That is ridiculous!" I burst. "Everyone gets along with the Lockwood and the pact for that matter so to even suggest that you or-"

He cut her off. "Damon." He says tiredly. "Everyone gets along with the Lockwood family and the pact except for Damon."

I flinched hard in my seat and turned my eyes to the man in question. Damon was a lot of things but I couldn't see him doing something like this especially after the horror that we went through with Stefan being missing. I swallow hard and soon turn my eyes to the window yet again. "If that was the case he'd have his hand in every pot because lets face it- he hates everyone." I say a smirk playing on my lips until I feel the heat of smoldering ice blue eyes on me.

I listened as Stefan continued to talk and felt my eyes straying to those blue eyes that had haunted even now months after our break up. Something had passed between us and I felt it, I knew he felt it to and that was why I had turned away from him. "Besides after the hell we went through with you he'd never do that anyone else." I remind Stefan calmly.

Sigh. "I know. That's what I told Mason. I didn't believe Damon had anything to do with this...I don't believe Damon had anything to do with the disappearance of those packs members." Stefan says truly tortured.

"Stefan" pause. "This is a good thing. It's progress." I say treading lightly.

I knew this was difficult for Stefan he was still reeling from the betrayal of his brother. But this-this was progress. I knew he and Damon would never ride off into sunset both wearing flannel shirts and fighting the good fight with a car stocked with blood bags but this was something.

"Is it!" Stefan nearly growls my way. "After all the shit he's put us through-all the lies, all the deceit everything! I still stick up for him and you..." he says his voice softening.

I froze. This was the first time in a long time we had spoken about me and Damon. Normally we avoided everything that was _him_ but Stefan was feeling talkative and I was trapped in a car with the very man we were discussing. "What about me!" I ask my voice full of alarm.

"You..." he stops himself and I'm afraid of what he'll say next. "You still want us to be brothers again. Hell, you even hold onto hope that he'll change not for you but for himself-but he's..." Stefan trailed off.

I shrink into the seat and turned around as I cradled the phone in my hand. "Stef- you have to let it go." I whisper. "You can't let that anger define you." I say as my heart breaks for my best friend. We had gone over this very topic so many times, but I understood Stefan and his problem with forgiving Damon, for even letting it go. For him I was sure the cut was deeper because at the end of the day they were brothers, and Damon had made a conscious decision to hurt his brother.

Silence stretches between the line.

"I forgave him for a lot of things over the years." He shudders. "For killing Lexi," he says painfully. "I convinced myself that the brother I had in 1863 was still inside of him, but I was wrong that man died a long time ago."

I couldn't help but start to tear up at his words. It was sad hearing how much he had loved his brother but at the same time knowing that in the end he was giving up. Stefan couldn't handle another broken promise in the eyes of Damon, so for him it would be easier to just stay angry because then he'd never hope they could be brothers...real brothers again.

I sniffled and soon bat away a few tears from eyes. "Oh Stefan."

Stefan too sniffed. "I'm sorry- I just" pause. "We should agree to blacklist talking about him. It makes me angry and makes you sad, that's why you're crying isn't it?"

I shake my head as in a negative. "I'm crying because you're my best friend Stefan and when you hurt I hurt."

We chat for a few more moments before saying goodbye. When the call finally ends it's then that I realize or better yet remember I'm still sitting in the car with Damon. I can feel his eyes on me and I'm already overly sensitive so I turn to him and raise my brows as if to ask him what is it that he wants from me? Things would never be the same for any of us, never again and Damon had done that he ruined everything.

"You didn't have to do that...defend me." He says suddenly feeling like shit. The scathing look she had given him and made him feel small. And the worst thing was the pain he had heard in his brothers voice. He and Stefan had never really spoken about anything. They tended to gloss over everything. They didn't talk about Katherine- even though she was living in the boarding house. They never spoke about Elena because she was the reason they were at this place in their relationship. As for Bonnie, Stefan would lose his shit if he had dared to mention the green-eyed beauty that could possibly be the love of both their lives.

"I wasn't defending you!" I shot out. I couldn't defend Damon. I don't know who could. Stefan was his brother, his family and he betrayed him; no one could defend that. "I could never defend what you did to Stefan." I say looking over at him heatedly. "I did it for him, this anger he feels is going to destroy him...and I don't want that not for Stefan." I say suddenly fascinated with my phone.

He chuckled bitterly to himself. Soon something ugly, something akin to jealousy began clawing out of his chest. It was always going to be Stefan. Bonnie would always choose Stefan- and Stefan would always choose Bonnie. Katherine better get hip to the game because those two could never be replaced in each others hearts.

"Its always going to be about Stefan for you isn't it?" he asked bitter. "I'm just some guy you use to love." He says chuckling. "Does your boyfriend know that you'll put Stefan ahead of him any day of the week." He snidely says. "Does he know that when things go sour, or when he disappoints you that'll be Stefan you run to?"

I openly glared at him. "My boyfriend is none of your concern." I say lowly. " As for your brother, someone has to think about Stefan. He needs someone that loves him and cares about him. He deserves happiness and to be free of the shit you've put him through." I say running my hands through my hair. I take a deep breath to calm down and soon speak again, this time my tone is a less harsh. "All I want is for him to able to let go of all the bad stuff and you're sitting up here jealous of the fact that I love your brother." I say glaring again at him.

He scoffed. "I'm not jealous."

"Whatever Damon, you almost had I fooled that you weren't the same man child that you've always been. You sit here and you say you've changed but you haven't and you never will." I say to cross my arms underneath my chest.

"Says the girl I had to basically throw over my shoulder in order to help her." He snapped back. She was such a pain in his ass, always calling him out of his shit but damn if he didn't find it sexy as hell. As much as it annoyed him, Bonnie loved Stefan, and vice versa and he loved them both.

"This isn't about me." I say patiently. "This is about you and your brother." I remind him.

"It's always about you because I love you," he says as if it's the most natural thing in the world. He heard her take a sharp intake of breath at his words but he was being honest. He wasn't perfect he was far from it, and he may have occasionally gotten jealous of his brother but he did love Stefan and he loved Bonnie as well.

"And I love my brother too!" he continues because it's the truth, he did love Stefan. They were brothers, and he missed his brother more then he ever thought he would. Being the same house together and passing each other like ships in the night had been torture for him because they were so close yet so far.

He turned to her, his eyes wide with anger. "Don't you think it kills me to know what I did to him, to hear that shit!" he says painfully while clutching his hand to his heart. "It kills me knowing what I've done to him...what I've done to you because you two are the most important things to me and I broke you." He nearly screams while hitting at his chest. "I live with that-everyday."

I put my hair behind my ear and regarded him with a look. For a minute or two I just looked at him, trying my hardest to actually read him. He was passionate I'd give him that but Damon was always good with words, but in the end they were just empty promises and Stefan deserved more."Those are just words Damon, words! You talk a good game but where's the follow up?"

He was suddenly enraged. "I'm here, I'm here with you even though you keep telling me you don't want me!" he was trying, he was trying so hard and she just didn't see it?

I took a deep breath. "I'm not talking about me." I say tiredly. "I'm not talking about us...I'm talking about you and your brother."

My sudden outburst seems to have seized everything because for most of the ride home we're both quiet. Out of the corner of my eye I look over at Damon. I run my eyes over him, notice how he's gripping the steering wheel, how his jaw is clenching in annoyance or anger.

"I told Stefan to let it go for the both of you." I say finally breaking the silence that was stretching on for far too long. "When we're all dead and gone you two will be the last standing." I say still looking out the window. "You're brothers...the Salvatore brothers and the only family you have left." I say now looking over at him.

"Stefan doesn't see it that way."

I licked my lips. "Maybe you should try and change his mind." I say pausing as he finally glanced my way. Damon was so consumed with trying to get me back that he was missing the bigger picture. I was happy, I was falling in love, I was moving on, but Stefan he was his brother and they had to make this work.

"He's hurt by you- but that doesn't mean that he stopped loving you, or that he doesn't miss you." I say before turning to look out the window. I was playing devils advocate now. Telling Damon to fight for Stefan when I knew that Stefan was still hurt, but above all I knew he missed his brother just as much as he despised his brother. But in the end I knew that they were better together then apart.

The side of his mouth curled up into a half smile, as he brought his hand out to rest on top of hers. This was the closes thing he was ever going to get to a green light on his quest to get his brother and girlfriend back.

He reaches across and runs his thumb over her knuckles, the familiar spark runs through his cold dead vines and lights him up with this warmth that can only come from Bonnie. He wonders if she too can feel the spark? He can feel it, he can feel her in his veins and if everything Gloria had said was true, he'd hold onto that spark till the day Bonnie ready. Until then he'd wait, and hold onto the spark.

GD-GD-

He had been a man of many talents and through the years he had acquired a particular taste and that taste was ridding the world of abominations known as werewolves and vampires. The moment he had watched his mother die at the hands of a wolf he knew that he would always hold them responsible for it and thus had hated all of them. His hatred for vampires had come as soon as his wife had left him for a vampire...or in her case tried to leave him for a vampire. He lips hitched up into a half smile at the thought of his poor tortured wife. That was what happened when you sided against him. Briefly he had wondered what his little girl would think of him if he knew how much he had done in order to stay at the top of the warlock food chain. To stay in power, the kind of power he had obtained so many sacrifices were needed. Lucky for him those sacrifice had come in the form of those lesser then himself.

Grayson Du Pres chuckled mercilessly at the young beta wolf that howled in pain. He watched as the beta struggled against the restraints. Smiling he knelt down and batted the wolf on the head as he continued to sweat. The wolfs bane that he had injected into the ware's veins was slowly but surly paralyzing him and the look of pain that crossed the wolfs face made him giddy with joy. In another room he had a withering vampire that he was going to take his time with disposing of.

"Why are you doing this to me?" the wolf cried out in pain.

Grayson tilted his head and examined the wolf in human form. "I'm doing the world a favor by getting rid of you." he says pausing thoughtfully. "Your cursed and man or boy," he says eyeing the wolf again. "That will kill once the full moon hits." he says standing up, "by getting rid of you and creatures like you I'm saving human lives."

He watched as the wolf once again tried to move but the wolfbane was taking over his body, causing everything to shut down. He had already gotten everything he needed from the wolf and his friends. It was a known fact that venom of a ware would cause a vampire to die slowly and the only thing he loved more then watching a vamp die was knowing that it was the product of a werewolf...and well doing the killing himself.

"Wh-what about me" the wolf gasped. "I'm human."

Grayson let out a thunderous chuckle that echoed throughout the dank room. "Correction," he says swooping down to look the young wolf in the eye. He reckoned the boy was the same age as his daughter. But unlike Bonnie who was so full of life and great potential this boy in front of him had the potential to kill an innocent, just like the monster that had killed his mother all those years ago. "You were human." he says his voice void of any kind of emotion except for malice.

The wolf gasped. "And neither are you."

Smiling he patted the young wolf on the cheek his had to much heart. "You've got heart...too much heart." with a wiggle of his fingers he slowly separated the skin of the wolfs chest before breaking the bones at the held it all together. Within the blink of an eye he snatched the heart of the wolf and held it in his hands.

He whistled gleely to himself. Next on his list was the vampire waiting in the next room. He had hoped the blood sucker had enjoyed listening to every moment because he was going to enjoy doing it all over again, this time with a vampire.

Shutting the door behind him he took the time to smoke a cigarette. He closed his eyes as he took a long drag. He had made a pretty good life for himself out of Mystic Falls, he had a group of witches that had worshiped the ground he walked on. Power that was unimaginable and the thirst that could never truly be quenched. He knew their was those who thought his practices had gone to far. That other witches and some warlocks had thought he was crazy for rejecting traditional magic- they were crazy for not embracing other types of magic, his type of magic that was brought on by the underwold.

Though he was man he had lots of things he did miss Bonnie, but knowing that she was safe and far away from the temptation of vampires and werewolves made him sleep better at night. After all his magic mirror showed him all and it seemed that Bonnie was living a full life just as any child should live. She was having fun and staying away from those who had the potential turn her into her mother. That would never happen, he'd never let that happen.

After yet another drag he puts his cigarette out and begins to whistle again. He has plans for the vampire. Plans that will be reminiscent of that the vampire had done to his victims. Yes it took a lot to be at the top but lucky for him, he was ready for it.

Song lyrics/quote Paramore: Last Hope


	18. Chapter 17 part 1

**A.N. **Hey all I hope you are all enjoying the rest of the summer. This chapter brings the focus back onto Bonnie. Which was needed. Thank you to everyone who has sent me reviews or, reminder emails or sent favorite my stories. I love you all. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Xoxo

queena

"No one is innocent as they could be, we all fall short, we all sin" Paramore

**Chapter: 17 part 1: The Pieces of Me**

_I knew the moment I tasted freedom...real freedom to be the person I wanted to be not what people had wanted me to be, the very moment I tasted him wrapped in sin that I would forever be changed._

_Alexandria Bennett_

Have you ever felt like you were just biding your time till the other shoe dropped? Like every second that passed was just bringing you closer to this ending that you weren't even sure you wanted. That was where I was in my life, I was waiting just waiting till the moment everything around me came crumbling down all because I hadn't completely let _it_ go.

Sometimes Mason looked at me like he could see through it-through all of the layers I tried so desperately to hide behind. It was almost like he could see past everything I was telling him and myself. And when I was sure he was going to confront me the look in his eyes would disappear. It was almost like I had imagined it, or maybe what I saw was based on guilty conscious.

Yep that's what I said guilty conscious! I know right, who would've thought that good girl Bonnie Bennett could do anything wrong. I was the good girl, the girl that was damn near perfect at least that was what everyone thought, though they were wrong. I made mistakes, just like everyone else. I was occasionally a hypocrite (my first night with Mason I bet Caroline over some shoes that I wouldn't hook up with him...and well I hooked up with him. I was extremely biased when it came to my friends and family. I had condemned other people for some of their sins but when it came to the people I loved, I let things slide. But most of all, I was a liar. I lied to myself everyday to keep going but the lies I told other people were the worsts.

The truth, was that I couldn't stop thinking about Damon. And it went beyond some old tale about a witch and vampire finding true love together. It had everything to do with me and him and how everything he said had affected me. I wanted to pretend that his words meant nothing to me, but I couldn't, because they were all I ever thought about.

Sometimes I felt like I was haunted by the love I had felt for this man. Because after everything he had put me through, I missed him just like Stefan had missed him. It was almost funny in a sad kind of way how all Stefan and I had been telling Damon that we wanted him to let us go so that we could happy. But at the same time we couldn't really let him go, we missed him, missed our collective friendships with him. And that was the problem! We were all still holding on instead of letting go, which meant we never truly wanted to let go. And at the same time we were giving him hope for another start.

He reminded me of that song by Katherine Mcphee, "_Everywhere_" because he was everywhere. No matter how much I fought it, how much I tried to deny Damon was always somewhere in my heart. In the silence I could hear the echo of our past life together. I could hear the sound of happiness and everything in between. He held this power over me wether he knew it or not, just as I held power over him. That power, that profound connection we found so long ago was what was still tethering him and me together. It made me wonder about the actual consequences about sharing blood with a vampire and what the true lasting effects would be, not that I could change anything now, we had gone way too far to ever return to the people we were before that first kiss.

Our connection had always been strong, but now that Damon was claiming to _feel me_, I wondered if he dreamed of me, just like I was dreaming of him. I had awakened many times during the night, with Mason holding me close, only for my subconscious mind to crave another man...so much that it had carved out a life for the two of us. Those dreams had left me feeling like I was falling apart. They had been everything I had wanted for so long. The reminder of that had me spiraling. Next would be the inevitable fall, and that fall would be sooner rather than later. Soon enough everyone would know, they'd be able to see it all. And that was the last thing I wanted, I had heard the fall from grace was hard, and hurt a lot of people in the process, leaving them with scars and bruises that only time could heal.

As each day passed I could feel the tug, the pull to Damon and the harder I fought it, the harder it got to fight it. Over the months of our breakup I had gotten good at blocking out my feelings for him, wether that was love or hate. But today I felt like, I was going to burst with so many emotions. I knew I should push it all away and concentrate on other things but today all roads led back to Damon.

It was times like this I wished that all of my friends weren't so busy. Now would be the perfect time for us to do something, and it would take my mind off of things I shouldn't be thinking about in the first place.

Nibbling on my lip, I mentally tacked off a list of people I could call to keep my company, that way I would obsess about those dreams. I could always call Caroline. I needed a day with my girls. Between my endless dreams of Damon, meeting my mothers true love and reading through her diaries which was beginning to sound a lot like some of things I had written in my own journals, I hadn't had a time to relax. Caroline would be perfect, she'd keep my mind off the vast amount of problems I had, and it would be good to have a day without men at the center of my universe. But then again, she was soaking up her time with Tyler, especially since he might be leaving tonight as well.

Stefan was out of the question because he was attending the supernatural meeting in favor of the vampires. It was known in the supernatural community that Stefan was probably the most trusted vampire by everyone because he got along with everyone. I guess it was good that Stefan was busy though- he'd take one look at me and instantly know that I was trying to hide things, not only from him, but from everyone. I wasn't ready for that- to go to that place where I had to admit things that I had been trying to run away from. Stefan would see through me. He'd see it all. And unlike Mason, who I believed at times could see through the cracks of my facade. Stefan would call me out on it.

That only left...

I shuddered at the thought, this may or may not be a good idea but I knew that right now, I needed a friend right now, and maybe I was overreacting but just...couldn't be alone not right now. Not when was feeling everything about him and then hating myself for feeling anything at all about him.

I grabbed my phone and quickly fished through the only person who could possibly help me right now. Once finding it, I prayed for a miracle.

The phone rang a couple of times before going to voice mail. I let out a sigh before perking up my voice at the sound of the beep.

"Hi Katherine, it's me." pause and long breath. "Bonnie. I..I'm-I sort of need someone to talk to and I guess that someone is you. Call me"

**BB-BB**

The last thing I expected when I called Katherine, was for her to show up at my house thirty minutes later, take one look at me, wrinkle her nose and then proceed to say, "well if your going to be tragic at least dress better." I in turn looked down at my pajama short and tank top and shrugged my shoulders. Seconds later Katherine had thrown me a bag and clothes and demanded I change clothes.

Hands on her hips, the vamp spoke. "If you're hanging out with me you need to dress better." She sasses "We need you to look like a big girl today." Katherine says smirking as I eye the clothing which consist of a short floral navy cami dress.

I give her the finger but later smirked once I was alone. Where we were going, I didn't know and really I didn't care. I needed to get out of my house and my head or I would go crazy like most of inhabitants of Mystic Falls.

Emerging from the bathroom I find Katherine looking through a book. She looks rather enthralled that is before she finally looks up at me. A smile hitches on her lips.

"I knew you could look hot!" she says with a very Katherine leer. Her eyes are shining and she looks, happy "Like I always say, the more skin you show, the better." The vamp says as she walks around me, only to stop right in front of me, with that damn grin on her lips.

This was typical Katherine either she was insulting me, or flirting with me. I did have to admit that I looked good. I felt better too. The only thing I added to the rather short dress was a pair of ankle boots because, well I lived in boots and I grabbed a leather jacket. My hair had been in two braids when she had arrived so naturally I took the braids out and left my hair wavy. As for my lips they were stained with red lipstick because, I felt like superwoman everytime my lips were painted such an alluring hue.

I roll my eyes at her obvious leer. I was just about to tell her stop leering my way when I noticed exactly what she had been reading. My eyes widen as I snatch the book from where she had placed it. Well in actuality it wasn't really a book, it was my own personal journal. After spending so much time reading through my mothers I thought it was high time that I once again start writing about what had been on my mind and naturally that had been Damon.

"I was bored." Katherine says like it's no big deal. It's a big deal, big freaking deal! "You know Bonnie, one can tell a lot about someone by what they write, and you write a lot." She says placing the diary down. "And your feelings for Damon," she gasped as her long lashes fluttered. "Nothing is that passionate without reason." She laments.

I glared her way as she threw the diary at me. I watched as it fell to the ground with a thud. That journal had included things not just about Damon but Mason as well. It had been the journal I had been writing in when I was working my feelings out after the fallout of everything and the beginning of me and Mason. It had everything up until now all my fears, all my wishes everything.

"Has anyone ever told you that some things are meant to be private?" I say glaring at her.

"Of course." Katherine says with a grin as she sips her drink."You have met my boyfriend." She says a smile falling on her lips.

I instantly simmer down at the mere mention of Stefan.

Katherine then let out a huff. "Now that you're done, being dramatic." she says flinging her hair behind her back. "We've got places to go." she says waltzing to the door and flinging it open. "You coming?" she asked looking over at me from over her shoulder.

I could practically hear the dirty joke she was about to say but the look on my face must have said do not even start because all she did was wink my way. This was the girl I had called to save me from myself, inwardly I was questioning my life choices.

"Yeah." I say before joining her. I still didn't know where we were going but as long as I was far away from my house I didn't give a damn.

**BB-KP-BB**

We ended up three towns over in Ethan Oak. The last time I had been here, it was with Caroline. We had been staying over at Elena's when the teen drama was probably at an all time high, and decided to flee the coop when fair Elena had finally fallen asleep. It was one of those rare times when we just wanted peace. We were all tired of the natural drama of Mystic Falls, which had consisted of Elena and her love triangle, which was beyond stupid even then. And me finding out I was a witch. Caroline being one of the closes people to me, had realized I was taking the change really hard, and had scored the two of us to invite to an underground club.

Katherine had naturally taken me to a bar. And honestly I don't know who was more excited to get out of Mystic Falls, me...or her...my money was on me because that town and my traitorous thoughts were going to drive me insane.

"You brought me to bar?" I say as the two of us stand outside one of the newer bars in this town. I hadn't remember ever being here, but then again the last time I had been here I had gone to a random party with Caroline and well...lets just say things didn't end well.

Katherine beamed. "Yep" she says popping the p sound. "And please stop trying to hide your excitement, I heard your heart beat speed up the moment we hit city limits of Mystic Falls and again once we pulled up to this place." She says motioning to the bar and damn if she were right.

Suddenly Katherine loops her arm into my own (similar to the way we had walked into the Saints and Sinners party), as the two of us simply walk ahead of the line and into the club. It seemed that Katherine had known the big bouncer because the smile that lit his face was almost contagious the moment he spotted her.

I watched as the two interacted briefly before we were ushered into the bar. It seemed like Katherine was a house hold name because everyone seemed generally happy to see her. The moment we sat down a drink was slid our way as the bartender had sent the two of us Katherine's favorite drink. I still couldn't fathom the fact that all of these people seemed to like, love her, she was alright not as cool as Stefan but hey who could ever be as cool as Stefan?

Without even saying a word we collectively grab our drinks and tossed it back. The warm liquid immediately filters through me giving me some sort of feeling that isn't shame and guilt. Those were the two feelings I had been feeling most of all and it was nice to feel something different. I had felt like a caged bird and I was beginning to think that had everything to do with M.F. it was a death trap and probably going to be the end of all of us if we weren't carful.

I gently sway to the music as I hear an old song from the 90's being played. Katherine seems to be flirting with the bartender and I can't help but chuckle to myself when she easily convinces the bartender to fork over a bottle of the good stuff.

When he finally scurries off, we look at each other and share a small chuckle. That was too easy, even for Katherine, but it was kind of amusing watching as the bartender tried and failed to get her number. He was the type of guy that thought that every girl wanted him and Katherine had proved him wrong. She did however flirt his way, hence the reason we had scored a bottle of something from the top shelf.

"Let the corruption began." Katherine says as our shot glass clink together

_several drinks later_

"You know what?' I say looking over at Katherine, my voice a low whisper I know she can hear a perk of being a vampire. If I remember correctly, vampires had wonderful perks. They could heal quickly, speed and agility came hand and hand and lets not forget bedroom etiquette. Hours on of bedroom etiquette had been very beneficial. They were also fierce, and protective of the ones they loved. Wolves were the same, the animal inside made them loyal, and caring. The loved really hard and wanted to protect with everything they had inside of them.

"I used to be fun," I say as a bubble of laughter escapes my lips. The sound is foreign even to my own ears. "I use to have fun." I say grinning as I signal the bartender over with a sexy smirk his way. When he raises his brows I ask for the rum, I feel like changing it up. The tequila has my head swimming and right now I just want to chill out with some mellow rum.

Katherine watches the girl enamored by the light in her eyes, by the ease in her voice. She had known the moment she had taken the witch away from Mystic Falls, the tonight would be the night that Bonnie would finally break. It was in her eyes, in her voice. What she was carrying, the weight she put on herself, and the men that were stealing pieces of her, it was it was starting to catch up with her. And tonight was about to explode.

She grabbed her own whiskey shot and drank it thoughtfully, before glancing over at the girl with the green eyes. "So what happen?" she says slamming the glass onto the table and turning her attention back to hypnotizing eyes and heart-shaped lips. Damn, now she knew why Damon was fighting so hard, Bonnie had something about her that made you want to be a part of her life, apart of her world if only for a few moments. She understood why Mason was trying his best to keep the witch now too. Even when Bonnie, was sad, she still drew you in, it was almost like she was the flame and everyone around her were mere moths.

I grin over at her though I feel like it's a sad grin, a mourning kind. "I got caught up in being what everyone had wanted me to be...that I lost myself." I say closing my eyes. "Between my mom, dad, Mystic Falls" I say pausing as a heavy sighs come out of my mouth. "Everything supernatural, add Damon...Mason." I say finally looking over at her. "I just...I just lost me." I can feel tears threatening to fall and push them back down before once again taking another shot that comes my way, this time thanks of Katherine. I smile in response.

"Maybe that's the problem. " Katherine says easily.

I shrug my shoulders. "Maybe, but I also use to have a moral code I lived by, I always knew what was right and what was wrong and now its like im skittering along the line so much that it's scary." I swallow hard. "I'm doing things that I don't normally do and it's all because of boys!" I say almost hysterically. "Like when did I let, boys dictate what I did and what I wanted?"

Katherine leans closer to her so that their shoulders are touching. "It happens." She says running her hands through her hair. "We all love, love. We crave lust and we want it all." She says handing the girl yet another shot. She had heard witches had a high tolerance for drinks and right now she figured that if she could get Bonnie to let the walls down then maybe she could help her. "And sex is the cherry on top." She says with a saucy smile. "And lets not forget we all want what's bad for us. Even the perfect boys are sometimes harmful for us- sometimes they make us put on guard down, and open up even the coldest of cold hearts." she says thinking about Stefan.

I groan. "Don't I know it?" I say bitterly. "It's like the more I know he's bad for me the more I want him. "I say turning to face her. "It doesn't matter that being with him changed everything that I was, everything that I clung to, nothing else seems to matter, because he has a part of me!" I blow out. I look over to Katherine who is blinking rapidly as if she's surprised by my outburst and I cant help but giggle at her response. In fact I cant help but giggle at everything. It must be the alcohol.

Katherine nods her head. Wow this was, easier then she had thought. Like really easy. Drunk Bonnie was certainly an open book. "I take it since your mentioning him, I assume you're ready to talk about it." She says pushing over another drink in the direction of the witch.

I furrow my eyebrows her way.

"To talk about Damon." She said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world because...well it was pretty damn obvious. The rest of Mystic Falls may have wanted to live in this ignorance bliss bubble but she was a realist, and the real honest truth was that Bonnie and Damon were made for each other. She had seen it, the spark, the flicker that was between the two of them...it was undeniable. Stefan may have wanted to believe that his best friend and brother being apart was for the greater good, and Caroline had been far too concerned with her own love life to even notice- but she had seen it, and if she could see it then everyone had known.

Her words were sobering to me. It was like cold water being thrown on someone and it had the same effect. I peeked over at Katherine to see that she was no longer looking at me like before, in fact she looked mildly concerned which meant everything I was running from, everything I was trying hide was obvious if only to her. Never did I think Katherine would take one look at me and see right through me. I had thought she would be the most oblivious to it all, little did I know kitty Kat, was more observant then anyone else in my inner circle. Or maybe I was just that transparent?

I swallowed hard. "I thought we were having fun, drinking and listening to music?" I say as my words slur at the end. Initially when I called I just wanted someone to talk to, but now that I was thinking about it, Katherine was perfect. She might even be the only person who could understand. What I was feeling. I needed Katherine, I needed some kind of perceptive by someone who was unaffected by any decisions I made. Everyone else, would want to not only protect my feelings but steer me in whatever direction they saw fit. Katherine had alliances to anyone but herself and her boyfriend.

She tilts her head to the side. "We were, and now its time we _talk_." she says grabbing a shot glass of her own. And holding it up to clink with the girl.

I lick my lips. "Maybe I don't want to talk about him. Maybe I just want to be free of him." I say not meeting her eyes.

Katherine smiles. "You don't mean that." She says using her fingertips to make the girl look her in the eye. "The only thing that could tear a girl down is the love of a boy." she says almost sympathetically. Of course her situation had been different, Stefan had been the person running from her but she loved him just the same. Even if she were bad for him in the eyes of so many she knew she loved him. "And you my friend have it bad." she says with a chuckle.

I look at her. "How do you know." I say swatting her hand away from me.

She tilts her head to the side, as a slow smile forms. "I saw the two of you at the block party." she says watching as the girls eyes widen. "I saw everything."

_Flashback_

_When he caught me...really caught me I knew that this was it. _

"_Why is it that everytime we take a step forward, you always run away?" he asked not caring how the situation looked to the outside world, or what she had been feeling inside. She was standing in front of him and he couldn't let her go, not when they were so close._

_I opened my mouth ready for words to spill out, words I knew to be true but hesitated, sometimes the truth hurt and I had hurt him so much today because I had told my truth- I didn't want to hurt him. But I had to protect myself. In the background, I could see my neighbors walking around with plates of food, someone was singing on stage an old Hall and Oates song "Wait for me". That song alone, had me feeling nostalgic. Damon had loved his old 45 records and still played them, this was a song he had even play for me on guitar._

"_I'm not running." I say looking down. Soon I feel his fingers lift my chin up so that I'm looking at him. I couldn't look at him because then he'd see it..he'd see that I was beginning to crumble._

_The walls I had kept stacking to keep him away from me were starting to crack because I could feel it...I still felt it all. _

"_Did you or did you not just run through a group of children?" he asked causing her to break out in a grin and despite the fact that she was indeed running from him, he smiled too. "Aren't you the same girl who played hop scotch with the neighborhood kids, managed a few jumps during jump rope and started a mini child riot when you briskly walked passed a group of children in your dance class?" he asked sarcastically._

_I couldn't help it, I laughed. I had actually walked in the middle of game being played with a few of the kids in my dance class. All to avoid Damon and really their was no running from Damon. He always found a way to catch me, even if he were the reason I was running in the first place._

"_Don't be dramatic." I say causing him to theatrically clutch his chest. We all knew he had a flare for the fine arts of acting and dramatics._

_He scuffs but his eyes are shining bright. "As dramatic as you were for running away-literally." he says intense and Damon like._

_Everything changes I can feel it, the way he looks at me, has my heart racing I can feel each beat, I can feel my skin getting hotter. "I was doing us a favor." I say tilting my chin up at him defiant as always. "Saving us from the unavoidable." I say which the inevitable would be round two of the train wreck known as Bonnie and Damon or in the words of Katherine "Bamon"._

"_Fuck me! You weren't doing that for us!" he says in a harsh tone. He takes a step back and rest his hand on his forehead. "You were doing all of this for him." he admitted quietly. He quickly turns and looks to the sky needing a little divine intervention._

_His silence unnerved me. And made the truth sink in. He was right, I was doing this for Mason, but he wasn't the only person I was concerned about- I was doing this for me and Damon as well. As much as I may have wanted him...and I could admit that I wanted him- that I thought about him all the time. If we ever got back together I'd probably spend most of my time waiting for the other shoe to drop. And Damon he'd be waiting for the moment I got angry and ran back to someone who wasn't him...someone like Mason. We were damaged goods together, and at the end of the day we'd always question ourselves if we were worth it to each other._

_I opened my mouth and then settled on licking my lips as he stood quietly with his back to me. If only we could just let it go. Maybe we could find real happiness._

"_Its better this way." I say causing him to spin around quickly and rush over to me. He meshed our forehead together not saying a word._

"_How can you see that." he breathes against my skin. "You love me...and I love you!" he says so close to me that it feels like he's a second skin on my body. He's melted against me as I am to him. _

_My breath hitches as he glides his hand on my arm. "You love me more than you've loved anyone else..." he pauses only to get closer. "And its that fear of loving me that makes you run." he says as if he can see right through me...through all my lies I've been telling him, myself and even Mason. "Your pride is what keeping you with him." he says pausing. "You don't love him like you love me and we both know its true." he finishes his breath against my skin._

_It's a battle of wills as we eye each other. We're still close, too close, especially for two people who had broken up eons ago. The tension that surrounds us is all consuming and I find myself finding the good fight._

"_Why can't you just let this go." I plead with him though I can tell by the look in his azure eyes that he cant let it go as much as I can't let it go. I knew that breakups were supposed to be hard but this thing with Damon not only had it been hard but what made it even worst was that it was difficult to stay away from each other...to fall back into old habits. "You can save me, you can make this easy on me...if you just leave it alone and stop pushing me." I say clutching at his chest. "Why can't you just let this go?" I ask again._

_He takes in her face, the anguish, and hears that way her heat rages in her chest. She's close to breaking. He can see it. The day has finally caught up with her and maybe this is wrong, maybe pushing her isn't the way to do this, but he knows she loves him. He can feel it, and he knows she can too. For once they can have what they both have wanted for so long and that's for someone to love them, he loves her and she...she loves him. "Because you're here." he says his dangerous blue eyes glaring at her harshly. He had already pour his heart out before and normally he wasn't that guy but Bonnie had always said she wanted more from him...more emotion more everything and now he was giving her everything she had wanted._

_I can say nothing but gape at him._

"_You're in front of me, and you Bonnie Bennett are real." he says pausing. "And this between us it's real." he whispers that last bit as she ducks her head down. He once again places his forehead against hers. His hand gliding to hers where he holds on for dear life. _

"_I spent most of my life as a vampire chasing after something that was never real...someone that was never real. In my head Katherine had been madly in love with me, just as I had loved her so profusely. In reality she liked me," he hitched his mouth out at as she rolled green eyes. "But she loved Stefan." he admitted which was probably for the first time he had ever said those type of words to Bonnie at least. "I chased her ghost around and still looked for that love, I had believed we shared in her double." he says pausing already knowing the Elena was still a sore subject for Bonnie. But if they were ever going to get past what happen she had to let him talk about it._

_I let out a scoff. The mere mention of Elena still made my blood boil. I guess I can chalk it up to the fact that I was still bitter about Elena. I blamed her and Damon for a lot of things but I also put her ahead of my own needs and wants. I should've told her that it bothered me that she had continue to seek out my boyfriend. I should have had a backbone, the same backbone I had always had where Damon was concerned. For years I let Elena get away with things that any other person would have squashed long ago. I put her ahead of myself and because of that she thought it was okay to chisel away my trust with Damon and get what she had always wanted as much as he, which was to be together...if only once._

"_I lusted after them, but that was all it was...I love see that now." he says looking into her green eyes. "I love you." he says finally as if he had been holding it in too long._

_I didn't know what to say to him, what to do. I knew this wasn't okay, that I wasn't okay. He was looking at me like I was his whole world, like I was his everything. Never had I seen that look in his eyes, especially for me._

_It's a suffocating feeling as he descends on me. I quickly shut my eyes trying to block out his face, and want desperately to close my ears to his words. "All the hurt...all the pain," he whispers against my temple. "The love and the hate...it's all real." he says softly. "You can't run from that, you can't run from what's in your heart." he continues hoping his words break through her armor. _

_I push at his chest. "Stop it! I mean it Damon-" I say shaking my head to stop his words._

"_What you feel about me, is real." he says breathing heavy. "It's always been real." he says watching as she tries to retreat back into her shell, as she tries to close her heart off to him once again. _

_My lip trembles as I'm fighting back the tears._

_Both of us aware of the validity of his words and what that meant to our turbulent relationship. I can say nothing, as he stares forward looking at me like he waiting for some kind of sign that he's finally gotten through to me. My own words gone, whatever refute I had wanted to say is long gone, only leaving me with a raging heart that is beating for a cyan eyed vampire._

_And that's when I run. _

_Within a blink of an eyes I'm in the safe confines of my home. That was what I was looking for something safe, something that was all my own and most of all something that wasn't damaged like me. That person was Mason, he was the guy for me and nothing could change that!_

_Inhale, exhale, inhale exhale. All I wanted was some kind of peace of mind, it didn't seem like that would happen not anytime soon, not with my luck. With my eyes closed I try and relax knowing its futile. I already know what's waiting for me. I can feel it, the familiar heat that rushed through me whenever he was near and I knew in my in veins, in my heart that I wasn't as alone as I had wished to be._

_I let out a labored breath already knowing he was here. He knew me, he saw me. He always had that was what I had hated him so much because Damon could see through it all- he always could. He could see through it all to the girl that was raw and often unfiltered. When he touches my everything that is buried inside, pent up soon releases and im suddenly launching myself on him, and pushing him away with all my might. I can feel hot salty tears falling down my face as he stands like the unmovable, unavoidable object he has always been to me._

"_I don't want you! I don't want you! I don't..."I rage on the fight leaving my body. My breath is coming out in harsh pants and he stands before me, welcoming every word because even he knows its all a lie. "I can't want you." I whisper my voice catching._

_He grabs me and holds me still. "Stop thinking about everyone else Bonnie!" he says holding me close to him. "Stop thinking about them and just...just fucking feel." he says his voice full of emotion. "You can't run from this, not me...not us." he says causing me to still in his arms._

_The fight in me is slowly ebbing away and when I look into those dangerous eyes, I see a mirror image of myself. "Please..." I whisper when I feel his hot breath on my lips._

"_No matter what I say, no matter what I do its always going to be you Damon! You're the man that I want. You are the man I want...even when I don't want you- something always brings me back to you." he says his eyes gleaming._

_I bite my lip at his words, so hard that is bleeding. "You-" I tilt my head. "You remember that?" I ask surprised he had heard me. He had been knocked out like completely out by someone who was trying to kill us...well me. And I- I was scared I was going to lose him forever. "You were knocked out."_

_He scoops down closer to my lips. "I remembered just the same."he catching eyes with me. Ever so slowly he sticks his tongue out and licks the blood off my lip. "Don't think, just feel." he whispers against my lips._

_Despite knowing its wrong. I lean into his touch. My hands find its way into his hair, where I fist it in my hands. He has one arm wrapped around my middle while I look into the eyes of temptation, my temptation._

_End of flashback_

Instantly I felt heat rush to my face as I remember the night that had sparked everything, the dreams, the guilt...everything.

"Katherine, what you saw..." I say only to be interrupted.

The vampire in question held her hand up to stop the girl for further talking. She had seen a lot in her years as a vampire but nothing could compare to watching Bonnie and Damon together. In fact in the days following the block party she had witnessed as Damon had taken a step back giving the green-eyed beauty some much needed space. As for Bonnie she had hid away opting to wrap herself in her security blanket also known as Mason Lockwood.

"You don't have to pretend with me Bonnie, haven't you learned that." She as it's the most obvious thing in the world, well beside the fact that Damon and Bonnie were still in love with each other. "I'm not the moral police nor, a saint. I know not everything is black and white that things are in technicolor and vibrant and nothing is more vibrant than love." She says passionately. "I saw the two of you together, you love him as much as he loves you." She admits.

The retort left my mouth quickly. I had been grappling with everything Damon for the last couple of days. "I'm not-" pause. I couldn't even mention his name and love in the same fucking sentence. "I just can't get him out of my head" I admit causing her eyes to widen.

Bemused she spoke. "You know why you can't get him out of your head, because your not over him, anyone with eyes can see it!" she says matter of fact. "How long are you going to ignore the obvious and run away from maybe the greatest love you'll ever find?" the vampire asked her hands placed on her delicate hips. She had been playing nicely but sometimes you needed that one person who was going to keep everything 100 with you.

I sigh and run my hands all over my face, probably ruining my makeup and the polished look I had which like everything else in my life was a facade. "Says the girl who ran from him for a hundred years." I snap causing Katherine to shrug her shoulders as if she not only didn't have a care in the world, but didn't give a damn about what she had done. Caring about Damon, loving him had never been easy, what kind of fool would I be to run back that?

Unfazed, Katherine shakes her head. Her tone is low. "I could run from Damon for a hundred more years and still feel nothing about it, you wanna know why?" she says leaning forward. "It's because I wasn't in love with him." She says honestly. "For me it was always Stefan." The vampire admitted. "Damon was in between till Stefan was ready for me." She admitted. "You on the other hand..." she said trailing off when she saw the look of pure horror cross the girls face.

I couldn't help but fidget under her gaze. "We should stop talking about this." I say recklessly running my hands through my hair. I was too emotional, I was beginning to get louder and didn't want piss Katherine off too much, after all she had come to my rescue.

"No." The vamp says shaking her head. "We're gonna finish this. You called me for a reason Bonnie. I have no allegiance to anyone else but myself. I'm the only person that can give you everything you need and I won't even blink an eye at the fact that you're in love with a man that everyone had already told you is all wrong for you."

I knew she was right, it was the reason I had called her in the first place.

"For what it's worth, I do believe _he_ loves you" she says letting her words hang.

My buzz was totally ruined. Whatever I had been feeling earlier, the weight of Mystic Falls finally off of my back was now gone. All I had left was that shiny halo that I had never wanted in the first place.

"I don't doubt his love for me...not anymore "I whisper. It was true, I knew he loved me. It was funny because before all I wanted was his love and now that I had it, I didn't know what to do with it...or with myself. I bite at my lips hoping I can keep the tears at bay. I've cried way too much lately and it doesn't solve anything, it draining and tears won't save me. "Sometimes love isn't enough." I say simply. I watched lots of people who loved hard and it wasn't enough to save anything.

She rolls her brown eyes. "And sometimes it is." she says just as easily. "So be honest what's your problem?" she asks still not seeing what the hell is the hold up.

I let out a loud sigh. Peering around I notice that the bartender who has been trying to listen on the sly has given up all together and is now openly listening.

"My problem is that im with another man, a man that has given me so much in so little time. What kind of person would I be if I just left him because I was having dreams of another man!" I blurt out covering my mouth as soon as the words have escaped. In reality it was more than just dreams it was feelings, that I had hoped had been stumped down long ago.

"Oh my god." Katherine says rearranging herself on the bar stool. "Your dreaming of him, like naughty dreams or like living in the burbs with a gaggle of bamon babies."

I ran my hands through my hair. I felt my face heat up as she asked me questions about the dreams I had been having. "I've been dreaming of him for days." I admit shockingly easy. "Sometimes we're intimate,"

Katherine yawned. "Carful your lady boner is showing" she says with a naughty grin.

I sent her a look. "Its like ever since Elijah had informed me of the fable about the witch and the vampire, the dreams are getting more persistent." I say with a deep swallow.

"Wait a minute whose Elijah?" Katherine had asked eyes darting all over the place. She had only known of one Elijah and that had been someone she had known so long ago. He was, kind and gentle but even when he took care of her she couldn't shake the feeling that he was a wolf in sheep clothing.

I let out a haggard sigh. "My mothers true love Elijah Mikaelson. She left my father for him and then my dad turned evil." I said giving her the short version. "Anyway my dreams have been recurring even when I'm awake, its like I get in a trance and I get flashes of me and Damon." I say turning to face her. "Last night in my dream I had a ring on my finger, it wasn't the Bennett nor Du Pres family crest but it was the Salvatore family ring."

This time Katherine covered her mouth only for a second. "You were a vampire."

I nod my head rapidly.

Katherine claps her hands excitedly. "You do realize that this solves all of your problems." she says not wasting time on waiting for an answer. "You're obviously torn between Damon and Mason, but the fact that you've been dreaming of Damon already tells you what's going to happen." she says quickly.

I shake my head. "I don't know."

"Bonnie stop being obtuse on purpose! You're a witch, a real witch who can probably see the future." she says watching as green eyes light up.

Instantly I'm on my feet pacing back and forth. The thought had crossed my mind many times but I had tried to ignore it because it wasn't possible. I couldn't be a vampire. And what about the other things I had been seeing, what if all of it actually came true?

"If this isn't a sign I don't know what you're looking for? This is your way out of your dead end relationship." she says nonchalantly. "Rip that band aide off and move the fuck on because the longer you stay in a situation the harder it will be to leave it." she says getting an amen from the bartender who had been listening in on the whole conversation.

I can't help but glare at her. "Don't you think your being harsh."

Katherine looks at her nails. "This is your life and if you don't live it for you then you might as well be dead dead, because you're just wasting away all of your potential of happiness!" She stressed. "Sometimes to find your own happiness you have to hurt other people and crush theirs. Its not pretty, its not even all that fun...Sometimes they whine for centuries but it'll all be worth it when you realize you love yourself enough to stop living for someone else happiness." she says while looking at her nails.

That was entirely too cynical even for me.

"Take time out and figure you out, trust me it'll be worth it when you are ready for all that love you've been running from." she says from experience.

I sighed deeply. I couldn't just turn my back on Mason. He needed me right now and I wouldn't desert him, simply because Damon had gotten to me.

"Not everyone can be like you!" I say harshly only to regret my words seconds later. Katherine for the most part looks the same, you never really can see too much of emotion on her face, but her body is another thing. I can tell that my words have stung her by the way she clenches her fist. Katherine tends to brush everything off when she's hurt and I had hurt her because when my back was pushed against the wall I tended to lash out at whoever was near me.

The whole bar suddenly is stunned in silence, causing me to gulp down slowly.

"Listen Kat I'm sorry." I say suddenly feeling like a super bitch. "You've been nothing but nice to me since and you didn't deserve to be judged...at least not by me."

Katherine tilted her head to one side. "You're right though- not everyone can be like me. Most people who look at me or have even encountered me, think I'm nothing but a liar who uses her body to get whatever she wants." the vamp says pausing. "But what they don't know is that I am a survivor." she says now looking at the witch. "I have lost everyone I have ever loved, my parents, my child..." she says. "I even lost Stefan." pause. "Some might say that I deserved it and maybe they were right, but the one thing I know is that I deserve to be happy just like everyone else and I have that again because_ I'm not afraid to go after what I want!_" she says with narrow eyes.

I watched as she reached for my hand. "You deserve that too. With the man you really love."

I put my head down. I didn't know why Katherine was so gung ho on me figuring out what I wanted. Their was a list of things that I wanted but right now I had bigger things to worry about, like my mother and my father. I also had to think about Mason and what he was going through on a personal level, I couldn't just take time out to sort out my life because life had to go on.

"Why is this so important to you?" I asked glancing over at her.

Katherine bites her lip while debating wether or not to divulge this sort of information but shrugged her shoulders. She lived her life with no regrets and said what she Bonnie needed a listen in the true art of looking out for number one! "Because you're better than that, you're not Elena-" she said hearing the audible gasp from the girl. "And if you don't figure out what you truly want you're going to be no better then her."

I let out an audible gasp as anger fuels me.

"You think I'm proud of this?" I nearly spat out. "You think I want to be anything like Elena?" I asked startling Katherine with the sheer hatred that is coming off of me. "She is the last person I aspire to be like, that I would ever want to be like." I say bringing my voice down a few notches.

The vampire in question is not fazed by the sudden anger of the witch because it was damn time Bonnie had gotten angry and had done something...anything other than sitting around and letting everyone else make decisions for her...about her. So what if she still loved Damon? People change their mind, they fall in and out of love everyday. Clearly she had hit a nerve with mentioning Elena, but it was the only way that Bonnie would wake up. She was so busy trying to make everyone else happy, or trying to do what was considered right that she could miss out on something bigger then what she was currently settling for. "Then stop being her, be better then her, and be better than me." she says with a slight pause. "You're scared. I get it. He's Damon but you're Bonnie."

"I'm petrified of history repeating itself." I say my voice now somber. I didn't want to be anything like Elena, She got off of going between brothers and feeling like a trophy piece. And I- well I just wanted to be happy. I wanted more then being a prize, I waned to love someone and know that-that person loved me with all their heart just as well.

Katherine shakes her head. "That's your problem, your so freaking scared that it's paralyzing you!" she voiced. Bonnie was a hard nut to crack but she was going to get through to her if it were the last thing she did today. "I own my shit!" the vamp says pointing to her chest. "And when I first met you, I thought you were fearless especially the way you wanted to protect Stefan, now not so much." she says glass in hand.

I found myself a loss for words. I was fearless I could take on anything thrown my way. Put me against any bad guy and I would read him the riot act and make sure he was running back home. The only thing that really scared me, that put the fear of god in me, was Damon Salvatore and the way we felt, I wasn't suppose to feel...not for not anymore.

Katherine leans forward examining the girl with the green eyes. For the first time since she has been friends with the witch, she see's her age. She's young, still young but that doesn't change who she is at the roots. Bonnie is a product of two influential witching families. She had heard lots of rumblings in the supernatural realm about the all powerful DuPres warlocks who were well known across Europe. And then you had the Bennett family, which was one of the strongest witching lines she had ever come across. Yet Bonnie, was sitting here running from her feelings.

"What do you want Bonnie?" she asked this time her tone changing to something more soothing.

I opened my mouth to say something but found that nothing had come out. What did I want, I just wanted to be happy, that was it-happiness it was simple, but sometimes your own happiness came at the extent to others. "I know I don't want to be like Elena- or my mother." I say with earnest. "My mother, she loved my father but she didn't love him enough and I don't want to be that person who stays out of obligation." I admit. "She never stopped loving Elijah and she couldn't let him go because he was tattooed on her heart." I say my voice catching at the end. I knew my mother had done what she thought was right, by sticking with my father- but that one choice it shaped everything for everyone.

Katherine nods her head.

"But most of all I don't want to want him anymore. I don't want to think about him...to dream about him." I say a tears spring from my eyes. "I don't want to love him anymore." I say somberly. "But it wont stop."I say swiping hair out of my face.

Katherine smiles over at the girl. "Because its real love. I've been around a long time and I've been with many people after Stefan but my heart didn't love them like it loved Stefan." she says finally seeing some light at the end of the tunnel. Bonnie was starting to get it.

I let out a scoff. "You know, I hate that he has this control over me." I say rubbing my eyes. "There is some part of me that calls out to him, that longs for a man that threw everything we had away on a fucking whim.

Katherine scoots over. "Okay, everyone knows I've done my share of dirt. I've broken many hearts over the years and honestly I could care less about them. But sometimes you make a mistake, and in the moment it doesn't seem that big but later you realize that your one mistake has cost you everything." she says with a shiver. Who knew she'd be defending Damon of all people, yuck.

I rubbed my face and finally sat back in my chair. I was positve my makeup was running yet I didn't care. "How did I find myself in this situation. I'm pining away for my ex boyfriend whose in turn pining away for me." I say falling back onto the couch.

"He's really good in bed." Katherine says a slow smile forming on her lips. "Like really good in bed."

I frown her way. "Stop it, I don't want to think about the two of you," I say gagging.

"I however don't have a problem thinking about the two of you." she says cheekily, glad that the air is clear and now they can joke.

"I love them both." I say for the first time out loud. It was scary to admit but this was my reality. It was always something I needed to face on my own two feet.

Katherine cracks her neck. "You know this whole thing could have been avoided. If you would've followed the rules." she vamp says passing a drink to the witch. This time it's a celebration drink. Bonnie figured it out, and it didn't take a psychic to know what was next.

"Your problem is that you played your hand wrong from the beginning. A rebound is just suppose to be that a rebound. You were suppose to screw till you didn't feel the pain anymore not jump into a relationship." she says schooling the girl who played the game wrong.

I open my mouth only for Katherine to put her hand over it.

"And before you start to bullshit me, remember you can't out lie a liar."

When she removes her hand I wipe my mouth. "Please don't do that again, I gag with the thought of where that hand has been."

Smirk. "Trust me if your hand were even lucky enough to wrapped around the greatness that is Stefan."

I couldn't help but gag. " I'm not drunk enough to hear this." I say with a lazy smile. "I do love him, Mason." I say looking over at her. "He makes me happy." I say simply. "But Damon, he still has a hold over me...over my heart." I say more to myself than to her.

This time Katherine smiles sadly. "What are you going to do?"

I let out a breath. "I'm going to take your advice and do what's right for me." I say turning to look at her. "But first I have to make sure Mason is okay." I say noticing the scowl on her face.

I know to Katherine it didn't make sense, but it made sense to me. I wouldn't turn my back on Mason, not when he had so much on his plate.

"What about Damon?" was her simply question. "This is going to hurt him too."

I looked over thoughtful at her. Their was more than met the eye with Katherine, she just didn't show it.

I swallow hard. "I cant give him what he wants until I figure out what I want." I say looking down. "He deserves...they deserve more than half of my heart." I admit to her though my voice is trembling.

Katherine beams. "Look at you acting like a grown up." she says tossing her hair behind her back. "My persuasion skills are bomb!"

I roll my eyes. "I need to talk to you about something else, something bigger then me and Damon, bigger then me and Mason...hell its bigger than me."

Now she was interested. "What did you do?" she asked truly interested now because by the tone Bonnie was in deep. "Its obvious whatever you've done has to be bad or else you wouldn't come to me." The vampire mused as she paced around. It was a human method she had picked up because nothing had made her nervous but whatever Bonnie was hiding was big. "It's so big that you don't want Stefan to know about it, which means Damon can't know about it." she says as she stops mid pace. "And since Mason is leaving down, he can't know about it either," she muses. "What did you do?" she asked just a little bit excited.

"Nothing!" I say throwing my hands up in the air. Once again I'm on the move because well, I can't sit still. I've got so much I want to share with someone and Katherine is probably the only person who could listen objectively...well sort of. "But what I tell you stays between the two of us," I say causing Katherine to nod my way.

**KP-ML-KP**

**Katherine**

Katherine had waited till the witch had gone upstairs to get ready for Mason to shake her head. How the girl found herself in so much trouble was still a mystery. The one thing she could say was that it appeared she had finally gotten through to her. And that made her feel happy, she helped someone today who really needed it and this was her reward. Talk about sappy, she was turning into the female version of Stefan. Oh dear lord.

Just as she was checking her messages that were all from Stefan, her vampire senses tingled, soon enough a familiar voice hit her ears and seconds later Mason Lockwood was standing at the door flowers in hand. If she wanted to, she could've made an exit without the wolf seeing her but, she and Mason had some things they needed to talk about.

"Elena!" the wolf called as he narrowed his eyes at the girl in front him. To say he was shocked as hell was a understatement because he never thought this would happen. For a brief moment he wondered if Bonnie had decided to forgive her, she had said she wanted to move on, that she wanted everything to stay in the past yet he had feeling something had been on her mind, and it wasn't necessary all about her mother and father. Damon- was always

Katherine sent him a look and tilted her head to the side. She wiggled her fingers as if to say no. "Guess again lover boy!" she says now a smirk look on her face. She had even gone as far as to wink at her one time lover.

He grimaced. "Katherine." he said not believing his eyes. The last time he had seen her, she had ripped his fucking heart out of his chest without a care in the world. And now he was standing in front of the woman he had loved so desperately and so freely. She had almost cost him everything, his family...his pack, his everything because he had fallen in love with a vampire.

Glaring at the woman in front of him, he clenched his fist as rage built up. If she had dared to touch a single hair on Bonnie he would show her what happened when you crossed an alpha's mate! Yeah it was that serious- what he felt for Bonnie was more then affection- she was his everything. As for Katherine, it was a known fact that once a wolf bit a vampire it was the end of that vampire and he would like nothing more to erase Katherine from his memory forever. "What the fuck are you doing here?" he said stepping close to Katherine. "What did you do to Bonnie?" he says clasping her arms and holding her tight. The veins in his arms began pulse as he became more frantic with each moment.

With a simple flick of her wrist, she got out of his restrains. Some men were so fucking suspicious! She had remembered a time when Mason was all about fun, easy and breezy fun! He use to hang on her every word and now he was looking at her like she was up to no good.

"Mason, you seem surprised to see me," she says fluffing her hair out. She checks herself out in the mirror to see that everything is still as flawless as before, and tosses a look over her shoulder. "It shouldn't be a shock, especially since you're from bumfuck Mystic Falls." she says with a grin.

"Home of vampires, werewolfs, doppelganger and of course our beloved witches" she says with a wink.

He outwardly seethed. "I don't have time for your shit!" he says his voice deepening. "Where...is...she?"

She grins. "Relax board shorts." she said affectionately. "Bonnie is upstairs getting primped for you." she says pausing as she walks around him. "As for me, well I'm here helping a friend conspire to do very bad things," grin. "For very good reasons." she said coyly.

He glared. "Stay away from Bonnie." he says through gritted teeth. "Whatever game you're playing..."

"No games." she said honestly as she looked at her former boyfriend. She liked Mason he was a good guy, good to look at and excellent in bed. But he was disposable, her budding friendship with Bonnie not so much. "You must have been too preoccupied to connect the dots, or you've been playing dumb." she says now standing with both hands on her hips. "Either way you and I need to come to an understanding." she says no longer feeling the need to play with him.

Mason scoffed. "Understanding? I understand that you're a selfish bitch and if I find out that you've had anything to do with my missing pack members," he says pausing as he steps closer to her. "I'll kill you myself." he says pulling back to grin over at her. "Wolf bites do kill vampires remember." he says just before licking his teeth for good measure. Katherine didnt know who she was dealing with, he wasn't the same lovefool that had followed her around- not anymore.

She yawned. "Still bitter I see?" she says with an eye roll. " Get over it! Whatever I did, led you to Bonnie." She said dryly because really she was team Bamon all the way. "And it led me back to Stefan." she smiled triumphantly because she won. She had finally gotten her happy ending and yeah-maybe some people got caught in the crossfire but it happens in life. Damon had been bitter just like Mason but in the end all roads lead to Bonnie so all was forgotten.

His shocked expression told her everything.

"Stefan?" he echoed as the wheels began to turn. Stefan was the man that Katherine had never let go of, he was also Bonnie's best friend, and Katherine looked just like Elena. The reality of it all was disturbing. He liked Stefan, he was a cool guy but further thinking about how entangled Bonnie was with everything Salvatore and now Katherine, worried him.

Katherine watched as many emotions crossed the wolfs face, clearly he was beginning to put everything together.

"Yeah and I like to keep it that way. Now lets both pretend that we've never met and haven't shared a bed." she says causing Mason to glare at her. Or the first time in a very long time she finally had a friend, a real friend in Bonnie and it was wonderful and real. And she couldnt go back to not having that kind of relationship again. Especially not because of her past with Mason Lockwood.

She then turns to the wolf who is glaring her way.

"I wont lose them...not over some fling I had with you." she says nastily. She hadn't had a real family in over 500 years and slowly but surly, Stefan, the man...the vampire she loved and Bonnie were becoming that family. She could add Damon if she wanted to, they tended to bicker and had they never boned they could've had a brother/sister vibe. She'd protect the family they were building

His cold glare drops from his face as he processes what she's just said. She seemed earnest in her words which is a shock. Everyone knows Katherine is always out for number one. Yep he was still bitter. Katherine deserves all the pain and misery that is sent her way. "I'm sure Stefan knows what he's got himself into, besides he knows how easy you are especially when you want good dick." he says with a smile. He cups himself to make a point causing the brunette vamps eyes to get darker.

Katherine chuckles and looks the wolf up and down. It appears Mason is stronger now, bitter as all hell but shit happens. In all of his bitter glory the wolf seems to forget one important aspect, and that was Bonnie. "Bonnie doesn't know though, and if you tell her about us way back when- everytime she looks at you she'll wonder if you're going to fall for Elena and her clueless twit like charms." she says mimicking his stance. "You'll not only ruin your budding relationship but my friendship," she says pointing at him. "And on top of that you'll give Damon the opening he needs to win back the woman he loves." she says as if this is painfully obvious.

He claps his hands at her giving the vamp the applause she so deserves. Katherine will always be the girl who was scheme, lie, cheat and steal and not give a damn about anyone else. "You never stop scheming, same old Katherine, still looking out for number 1." he says shaking his head.

She gives him a curtsey. "Is it worth getting back at me for not loving you? Would losing Bonnie be worth it?" she asked with a tilt of her head. "You can make your decision do whatever you want." she says now walking to the door. "How long do you think it would take for Bonnie and Damon to get back together?" she asked going in for the kill. " How long do you think it would take before the kind of love they had won?" she says hand on the doorknob.

Mason glared at her as his insecurities were raising to the surface. "What do you even know about love?"

She smirked. "I know when it's real." She then let go of the door knob and walked the distance between the two of them. "I also know the difference between being in love with someone, and loving someone."

"So do I." he said to an empty room.

**A.N. 2: **The next chapter should be up sometime this weekend. I've got my updates planned so yay! The next chapter will mainly focus on Defan, though you'll get a little of everyone!


	19. Chapter 17 part 2

**A.N.** Hey All! Im back with another chapter! First i'd like to thank you all for your reviews, your opinions and everything! I wasn't sure how the chapter would be received since i had been gone for so long, but you all made me feel so good, because you cared, even if you were a little upset, you still cared. This chapter was hard to write because defan have a lot issues and a lot of feelings between them.

**special thanks to**: , brasilianfan1, jordanjanellejoy, jewelsstars, silent-reader-220, brynn brigham, Bamonforever, babyfacedswurve, guest, guest

xoxo

queena

* * *

><p>"<em>The difference between you and me, I'll make it impossible to let go."<em>

**Chapter 17 Part 2: Thinking of You**

Damon Salvatore stood by the window glass of bourbon in hand as he watched the rain fall. It felt like he had been at that damned window for days waiting, just waiting for the moment he could start his redemption arc with his brother and Bonnie. For once in his life he was trying to put someone ahead of himself, mainly the two people he loved the most. He wanted nothing more than to finally talk to his brother. He wanted to make things right, the way it should've been a long time ago. But Stefan, had elected himself the savior of all things supernatural and had spent the last three days charming the wolf pack of Mystic Falls. And today his little brother was representing the vampire faction of Mystic Falls as he and the other supernatural entities that lived in the falls had settled down with Gloria as the chairman of the supernatural meeting.

For the last three days he had been waiting patiently until the time was right to finally bridge the gap between he and his brother. He had used his time away from trying to win Bonnie back and actually thought about everything he had lost with Stefan. He knew that they couldn't fix what was broken between the two of them in one night, not even a day, it would take a long time to fix them but he was determine to do so.

For years they had danced around issues that were very real, always putting their personal troubles together on the back burner for another day. Together they had a lot of animosity. Most of it knowingly came from him. The other part came from Stefan. He had been so full of jealousy and resentment that it clouded his judgement and for more than a hundred years he had taken all of that out on Stefan.

He scoffed this was going to be harder then he thought. Resentment had followed him and he was positive it had infected Stefan like the disease. At this point in time he had a better chance of getting angel wings then to ever recover his long lost relationship with Stefan. It sucked, he had never thought he was miss Stefan so much as he did now. It was even more difficult knowing he was so close and yet when he looked at him-everything was blank. Stefan was numb to the pain to being let down constantly and he knew the feeling, because for a long time he had been that way. He just never imagined he would bring that sort of pain to the only constant person in his life.

The sound of a motorcycle pulling into the gates had broken him, out of his sudden mind wanderings. Stefan was home and judging by the purr of the cycle, his brother was riding his newest toy which was a new motorcycle. Gone was the piece of junk he had bought his brother years ago. Though he knew it still sat in the garage a part of him, was sad to see that Stefan had given up on riding something he had loved so much. But then again, he couldn't blame him especially when Stefan had always given him the benefit of the doubt and he had always taken his brother for granted.

With the sound of the slamming door, he was alerted that the time was now. It was time he owned up to not only his past mistakes but the fracture in his relationship with his brother. It hadn't happened overnight, it had been a slow process and finally after more than a hundred years he had managed to get what he had claimed he wanted the moment he turned...which was revenge.

He waited patiently, counting the seconds while swirling a glass of his favorite drink in hand. He was nervous which never really happen and tugged at his shirt in a nervous habit. This was going to be a challenge, one he would welcome. A breath later he watched out of the corner of his eye, as his brother walked through the room, a helmet in hand. Stefan had headed straight for the bar and poured himself vodka straight. He watched almost curiously. It seemed that heartbreak had made Stefan kind of a badass. He might go as far to say as his brother was cool. Though he would never admit that out loud. He'd rather spend an hour with Caroline and her whining. The mere thought made him shudder.

"Did you enjoy your little motorcycle ride?" he asked breaking the silence. "Made you very thirsty," silence. "Much like Katherine, she practically begs for it every single time you walk through the door." He says a grin with teeth.

Glare

Blue eyes watch as Stefan crosses his arms in front of his chest, impatience showing. He remembers when his little brother was more calm, now it seems Stefan is rash and his temper is rivaling his own. He's aware that Stefan is back on human blood full time now, and that now he's much stronger and quicker. That however, doesn't stop him from going after what he wants, which is to talk to his brother.

Crystal eyes roll. Apparently this was not the time for jokes. "Fine whatever" he says sighing dramatically. "I think we need to talk."

Blankly Stefan speaks. "I think you've mistaken me for someone who wants to talk to you." Stefan says bored. "If you're looking for a friend call Rick. If you're looking for pussy," brow furrowed. "I'm sure you can find Elena." Stefan says before offering a curt smile and a nod of the head.

He watches as Stefan places the glass down and the turns to walk away. He knows that deep down, buried beneath all the hurt was still the boy that had followed him around the estate, still the same boy he taught to play football. Stefan never gave up on him, no matter how bad things got.

"I've lived the kind of life that allows me to make mistakes and easily erase them. I think I've lived that way for so long that it left me with no room for regrets." He says pausing. "But I do have regrets." he rushes out.

Stefan clicks his tongue. "I don't know what this has to do with me?"

He chuckles dryly. He had always been so talkative he often talked to much but now it was like the words wouldn't come out, not fast enough or elegant enough for what he needed in this moment. This would be the second time he would attempt at pouring his heart out in the span of three days. He could only hope that this would go as smooth, or smoother then his confessions to Bonnie. And really that hadn't gone all that well, he may have broken her down, he may have been able to see the words of love that were written in the iris of her green eyes, but even he knew, that it would never be easy for team Bamon.

"This, this isn't easy for me." He says pulling at the neck of his shirt. "So um, bare with me." He says while Stefan stands with his back to him.

Now he has Stefan here, waiting for him to say something. Anything and it scared him. He wondered if his words would be enough, because words were sometimes just words, especially whenever it came to _them_. Or maybe words were just words when it came to him. Maybe he was the problem.

"I've been playing the blame game for far too long, and I figured I'm not getting any younger, maybe it was time that I finally own up to my mistakes." he says with a shy smile. "I blamed Giuseppe fo wanting me to be everything he wanted me to be. I blamed Katherine for choosing you over the option of having me- but I blamed you everything else. He says his voice coming out choppy. It was difficult to admit you had been wrong for so long.

Stefan blinks his jaw set his gaze steely.

"But I cant blame you for this," he admits motioning to the distance that is between them. Their standing clear across the room from each other which in fact mirror the state of the brotherhood they once shared.

Stefan lets out a deep sigh but says no other words.

"It was much easier to blame you for everything then to look in the mirror at myself and admit all the wrong things I've done were because of me. And the result was because of me." he says slowly. He felt like his words were just coming out, like words. That Stefan was going to see his admission for something less than what it was, because he hadn't been sincere with his brother, really honest to god sincere since they were humans and the sudden change of heart was suspect to say the least.

Stefan turns around to face him. "Why am I not surprised you stopped me to talk about yourself." he says a bitter smile on his lips. "You need help, professional help." The younger says glaring." Katherine use to be a psychologist go talk to her." Stefan bit back. "She'd enjoy picking you apart."

He chuckles to himself. Stefan is different, he's sharper with the tongue, and doesn't hold back not like before. It seems that after being betrayed over and over again, his little brother had finally stopped trying to find the bright side of things. He was positive if Stefan had directed his anger and hatred to someone else, he would've been like a proud father.

"Its time you and I finally talk, I want to talk to you."

"Why" Stefan asks simply. His face devoid of emotion but his teeth are clenched. " We have nothing to talk about..nothing to share." He said his tone cold and detached.

Damon watches him almost dejectedly. This is where they were, this was how far they had fallen. And it was all his fault. "Because your deserve the truth. And I'm tired of pretending." he says walking over to the bar and fixing himself a drink. This was going to be a long night and he figured not even the copious amount of booze he had been drinking before Stefan had come home would prepare him for this.

"You know it true what they say, you live with someone long enough they know your habits can tell when your lying not only to yourself but to others." He let out a deep breathe mentally preparing himself for this sudden confession. Who knew confessing ones's inner most thoughts, would cause such anxiety. His inner most thoughts were mostly consumed with inadequacy, spite and jealousy. And now he was going to share it with the person who he had associated all of the pain with.

"You were right." he admits causing Stefan to not only stop but pivot his way. His brother is looking at him skeptically because it is a fact that he never, ever admits to being wrong.

"Oh yeah about what?" Stefan asked stopping in his tracks to face his brother. He's aware that Damon is up to something, he's stalling and probably blowing smoke out his ass but he'll humor him for just a bit before striking like a cobra and going in for the kill. Since being on human blood he's sharper with the tongue and since he has no use for Damon he wouldn't mind striking against him.

He's surprised but continues to speak. "Me" he whispers and when Stefan cradles his ear as if he cant hear, he resist the urge to flip him the bird. Regardless of the shit he had put Stefan through, he was still his brother and he did love him. He had a shitty way of showing it, but Stefan was all he had as Bonnie had reminded him.

"Oh really?" Stefan asked looking at his brother, as if he's sizing him up. "How so?" the younger asked as he gave his full attention to his big brother.

"About _her_." he says with a staggered pause. "I was jealous of your relationship with _her_." he says his words coming out faster then he thought. He hadn't elaborated on which her he was talking about because it applied to both of them. "And then one day, I was jealous of your relationship with _them_."

It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who the them in the conversation is.

Grey eyes turned ghostly light as anger flooded the younger vampire. "Tell me something I don't know, now do me a favor brother and take you're b.s. to someone who gives a damn." he says with a tilt of the head.

"The three of you were so close. " he says tumbling on his words. "And I wanted so desperately to know what if felt like to connect with someone the way you had with both of them. They loved you, and you loved them and it drove me insane because once again you were the lucky one, you didn't just have one girl hopelessly devoted to you but two." he paused. "You had the two most sought after girls in town and I was green with envy because I thought, you were no better then me, but at the same time you got everything I ever wanted...even before I realize I wanted it." he says.

Stefan looks over at him with disgust. "You know I'm listening as best as I can." the grey eyed vampire says as he crosses his arms in front of his chest. "But all you do is whine and this conversation is beginning to sound more pathetic with each word you speak."

He licks his dry lips and ignored the harsh words his brother spat at him. "And I figured since you had two girls at your beck and call, you wouldn't miss one of them." He reasoned. "And so I pursued Elena."

What he didn't expect was the unexpected gulp of air he heard Stefan take at the mere mention of Elena. Or the pained look that had crossed his features once he had finally brought her up. He made some terrible mistakes this one, was probably one of the worst. He let things go way too far for way too long. It had taken him till now after years of pining for Elena, and later getting her, that he realized what he felt for her was lust and left over unresolved feelings for Katherine. "At first I wanted to annoy you, then I wanted you to know what it felt like to have someone you love trample all over your heart." he says turning to face his younger brother.

Stefan looked over at him and smiled. "Why don't you bring out the violin for your sob story. I've heard this a million times over. Katherine broke your heart and as a result you became a vindictive bastard who gave no fucks about anyone." he says green eyes never clearer in this moment. Walking the distance between he and his elder sibling he stopped close to him. "Man the fuck up big brother." he says causing blue eyes to flash with a hint of ice.

Damon looked over at his brother, anger coursing through him. He wanted the fucking truth, he'd give him the truth. "we both know I came back to Mystic Falls to make your life a living hell, and I was content on ruining your love life..." he says pausing. " Then I wanted to hurt you." he says without a care because it was true. "I wanted you to bleed the way I bled, hurt the way I hurt." He says passionately because it was the honest truth. He had told himself that once he finally was able to talk to Stefan and even to Bonnie, that he was going to be honest with them." he can hear the sound of gritting teeth and continue.

He walked across the room as memories assaulted his mind. All of the planning he had down originally to watch his brother fall. He had watched Stefan with both of them, all the while trying to figure out what would hurt more, taking the girl or seducing the bestfriend. In the end he had done both, but at the time his initial plan was far from his mind.

"I use to watch you with her, I wanted to see what it was that was suppose to be so special about the two of you together. I didn't see it, I couldn't see it, maybe I never wanted to see it. I didn't understand how she could be one way with you and then another way with me. It was almost like she was two different people whenever she was with you or me, and I was convinced that I was the better person for her." he sighed.

Stefan crosses his arms over his chest. "Maybe we were in love." he says darkly to his brother. "Maybe just maybe we were content and happy."

He puts his head down. "I couldn't believe that, not when I had all these feelings and I knew she had the same feelings for me as well. I had convinced myself that I had needed to know what it felt like to be loved by her.. I needed to know that someone who could love you so much could me just the same, and that was why I pursued her."

Stefan clasp his hand together. "So your telling me that knowing that you were ruining my relationship with my girlfriend at the time, made you feel validated, made you feel special because you knew she was attracted to you." Stefan says point blank.

He wipes his face. It had sounded much better in his head.

"Your so full of shit you know that!" Stefan roars back. "You've been talking in circles when we all know the truth. You've been planning this for a very long time and now it's all finally come to light." Stefan says with a scoff. "You lied to me, and you lied to Bonnie. You made us think you had changed for the better but you were just playing us for fools.

He shakes his head. "No." he says spinning around. "In the beginning I may have entertained the idea, but those moments where you and I were...brothers that was real and that was honest."

Stefan glares. "It was a permeative plan, that's what it was."

"I stopped planning your downfall when Bonnie came into the picture." he admitted honestly. Like he had done with Elena, he had watched Stefan with Bonnie as well. He was intrigued by their connection but he had never really looked at her like that.

Stefan clenched his fist. "Don't you dare say her name."

Blue eyes landed on the floor where they had first touched. He could still hear her harsh breaths, he could still feel her warm body on top of his, under his. He couldn't get her taste out of his mouth for weeks and by then she had even given in to the pull. That first night, that first unintentional encounter had changed everything for him.

"She had stumbled into this house looking for you." he says while he mind goes back to that first night. "It was pouring outside and she looked a mess," a quirk of the lips. "I had never seen her so vulnerable or so beautiful. She was broken, and raw and I understood what that felt like because, for the first I was her and she was me."

Stefan licks his lips. In all honesty he had never heard his brother speak about that faithful night that had started the ill fated romance between Bonnie and Damon. "You took advantage of her, that's what happened." Stefan said point blank.

"No" he says sharply. He was a lot of things but that night, with Bonnie they needed to be close to someone and they found each other. "I never thought it would be Bonnie." he admits. "_I love her_." he says suddenly. "I'm in love with her and I never thought I'd be that guy, nor did I ever think she'd be that girl." he whispers amazed that this is going so well. He thought for sure it would've gone much worst.

Stefan nods his head. "You love her." he says before gnawing on his bottom lip. "Where was that love when you were screwing her best friend?" he asked glaring at his brother. "You were too busy hating me, too busy being the vindictive bastard that you are to even think about Bonnie." Stefan says taking a deep breath. "Let alone what your actions would do to me!" Stefan yells.

Momentarily the grey eyed vampires facade slips and the hurt shows on his body. The younger vampire walks the span of the living room, as emotion bubbles from his pores. It hurt, it hurt so fucking much! He had never hated anyone as much as he hated Damon. He hated him and wasn't sure if he would ever stop hating him. But the worst part was knowing that he loved him just the same. It was after all a bad habit.

"Do you remember when we were kids," Stefan says with a huff. "I used to follow you around everywhere you went." He says with a chuckle. "You were my big brother and it didn't matter what you did, or what you said because I believed in you." Grey eyes were now fixed on the window as he looked out into the night. If he looked hard enough, squinted even he could see the two of them running around the manor. He could hear the sounds of laughter when mother was still alive. She was the glue that held the family together kept them safe and out of harm way. When she passed away, everything was left to his nanny Lily, a beautiful cinnamon spiced woman, girl that was hand picked to take care of him by his mother and Damon who had more than often took over the role as father- as his own father was often parading around the grounds for his newest fixation.

He turned to look over grey eyes meeting blue."You were more than just my brother, you were my bestfriend, you and Lily," he paused the words hurting him as much as it had hurt Damon. The mere mention of Lily was difficult on both of them. Lily was the first girl his brother had loved, she was always someone their father had fixated on for so long. During her time as his nanny Lily had birthed many of his siblings though the first two had been still born, the last one had killed her, and had changed everything for everyone.

Damon grips the couch fingers digging into the plush leather. He knew Stefan was being honest with him, he could take it after everything he had shoved out to his brother. But what he hadn't expected was the mention of Lily and judging by the shocked look on his brothers face, he too was caught off guard at the words that had obviously tumbled out of his mouth. Lily was the first girl he had ever loved, looking back he could see that, he could feel it. She made him happy, she made him smile and she had loved Stefan as much as he. If only he had run with her and Stefan. If they got away and run up north, they could've be together, he and Stefan wouldn't have become vampires, never would've met Katherine, and perhaps the toxic relationship he had developed with Stefan would seize to exist right now. As for Lily, she would have been spared, Giuseppe never would've gotten his hands on her and she wouldn't had died while giving birth to his baby sister, who in turn had died hours after her mother.

"We were close." he says finally speaking up though his voice is strained. If he closed his eyes he could remember all those times he had managed to get Lily and Stefan out of the watchful eye of Giuseppe, who he had learned early on had thing for girls with cinnamon sugar skin-yet condemned anyone else for having the same exotic taste.

"We used to spend hours playing in the rain." he says as his lips hitched up. "Do you remember when father went away, and I talked you into playing the rain." he pauses a fond look crosses his eyes. 'Lily wasn't pleased."

Stefan despite himself loosens up, as he too gets caught in the moment. "She was so upset with you, but somehow you managed to convince her it was okay. The two of you chased me through the garden, and you fell in the mud." Stefan says a hint of a smile forming on his lips.

"And you and Lily came tumbling after." he says finally meeting eyes with his brother.

Stefan clears his throat. For a brief moment he could remember the innocence that use to surround he and his brother. They were different people back then. They were still innocent, but those days were long gone. After Lily had died, things had changed, everything around them had changed or maybe they were finally realizing what they had been blindly living through...what everyone around them was living through and at the hands of their own father at that.

"He killed her, he forced himself on her and she died giving birth to our sister." Stefan says with a pause. "And the whole world wept, I wept for days." Stefan says looking over at his brother. "Her death, it brought us closer because only you could understand how I felt and only I could understand you." Stefan finishes. "Months later though-father killed us, and when we came back the only person I knew I could live my life out with was you." he says hands in his pockets. "I could've chosen the true death, I could've gone to heaven with mama, and Lily," he grimaces as his face cracks.

Damon flinches at the memory. When Katherine had given him her blood, he hadn't been thinking about the prospect of being with Stefan he just wanted to be with Katherine. She had come to Mystic Falls right after Lily had died and he needed something...or someone to concentrate on and Katherine had been that person. "I don't know what you want me to say." he says pausing.

Stefan ignores him and continues to talk.

" I wanted to live...and I wanted to live with you at my side because you were my brother." Stefan says grey eyes glazed over with hurt and unshed tears. He was hurting so much, the mere mention of their mother had always hurt his heart, and Lily, she was like a second mother to him, he loved her just the same. However he chose life and life with his brother who had done nothing but bring pain his way since he made that decision.

The sound of rain settles between the two of them as thunder roars through the night causing the lights to blink out leaving them alone in the dark shadows with the fire place of doom as their only light.

Taking a deep breath he spoke, blue eyes wild as he continued to look at anything but his brother.

"After Lily death, things changed, I changed." he admitted. He needed to change everything and everyone was evolving and he and Stefan had been stuck in the same spot since they had watched the life slip out of her eyes. Her death had paralyzed them, they couldn't go back nor could the move forward. When Katherine came along, she brought life back to them, although in the end she ended up taking it and replacing it with what they had now immorality. "Katherine she..."

Stefan growled deep with his chest. "Leave her out of this." he warned. "This is about you and me, whatever Katherine did or didn't do, shouldn't have effected us."

"Why does Katherine get a pass after all the shit she's caused throughout the years?" he asked noticing the glint of anger that crosses his brother. "Why cant I bring her up because she's part of this, she's part of the reason I changed." Damon says eyes narrowed at his brother who is pacing back and forth like a caged animal. He was well aware that whatever plan he may have had planned went out the window the moment they started talking.

This wasn't going to be easy, not with Bonnie and definitely not with Stefan.

Stefan chuckles bitterly."This isn't about Katharine, this is about you!" he nearly roars as he stares down his brother. "Don't think just because I'm fucking her," Stefan says pausing a smirk planted on his lips. "Doesn't mean I've forgotten anything she has done or what role she played, if any on the failure of our brotherhood."

Damon sucks his teeth but says nothing as he tilts his head as if letting motioning for his brother to continue.

"This is about you and how you've always acted like your pain and your feelings were much more important than anyone else!" Stefan seethes as he tugs at his hair. This was what his brother had wanted, he wanted this and everyone had known that Damon had always gotten what he wanted.

Damon swallows hard. "I'm trying to make this right."

Stefan shakes his head. "You're not listening to me!" he ranted. "I'm here!" Stefan screams. "I've always been here for you because you're my brother." he spat out. "Can't you see me, can't you see the hell you put me through?" the younger vampire says a manic look on his face before he smooths it out.

Damon watches in shock he couldnt remember the last time Stefan had shown that type of emotion on his face. Normally he was the one to break things, to rant but this time he was watching as Stefan, came apart piece by piece.

"Stefan." he calls brows collapsing across his face.

Stefan clear his throat. "I loved her, and you went behind my back!" he says pointing to himself. "Me " Stefan says pointing to himself. "Your brother and you slept with my girlfriend!" he says licking the side of his lip. "You didn't care because your selfish!" he says nodding. "Your just like father!" Stefan realizes while finally looking up. Seconds later he wasn't surprised when his brother pushed him up against the fireplace.

At the mere mention of he and Giuseppe in the same breath he immediately lost it. Violently he pushed his brother against the wall with one hand, while the other punched a hole through the plaster. "Don't you dare compare me to him!" he says shivering at the mere thought. "I would never do the things he did!" he screams. "I would never hurt people like he did."

Stefan chuckles. "Yeah you would, you do everyday. You manipulate people and exert your control on their lives." he reminds. "Do you remember what you did to Caroline? And Bonnie, you bound her powers against you!" Then his voice goes serious. "Father, he hurt everyone in his wake and had an excuse for all of it." Stefan growled. Does it bother you that you've become the one person you hated more than anyone else?" he questioned his voice hitching at the end.

Stumbling back he didn't dare look at his brother. He had not become Giuseppe! He'd sooner die to become that twisted bastard. His father had been a natural born evil. He had ruled the house with a strong hand, and used that hand on everyone. His father, had hurt everyone around him purposely. He was the type of man that took pleasure in seeing you in pain. Giuseppe had tried many times to pit he and Stefan against each other it never work. And when that wouldn't work, he went after Lily. Her crime which was never a crime in fact, was the fact that her skin had a hint of brown, and that his sons had loved her so. Giuseppe had gone after her with precision on a mission to not only own her, which sadly he did but to own her mind, body and soul as well.

"I'm nothing like him!" he shouted into the room." he's now in front of his brother holding onto the lapels of his shirt. "I'm not him."

Stefan reaches out and places his hands on his brothers shoulder. "You hurt the people closes to you and you don't care that it pains them." he reminds his brother. "Everyone is a casualty to whatever you want. You don't care- but I did care." Stefan says watching as Damon slinks back away from him. "I would have done anything for you- because you're my brother. I would've given you anything you asked for, but you- you take from everyone till there is nothing left inside to give. You did it with me, and you did it to Bonnie."

He shakes his head. He wasn't doing this with Stefan. Bonnie was not part of this, he would discuss her with his brother. He looked up his face half covered by the shadow of the night. "We're not discussing her." he says using his brothers earlier words. They would never really see eye to eye especially about Bonnie.

Stefan shrugs his shoulders. Honestly he didn't like bringing up Bonnie because it was still a touchy subject for him. He felt responsible for Bonnie, he wanted to protect her and knowing that he let his brother get his hooks into her, only to bleed her dry it pained him.

The younger waltzed over to the nearby piano and sat silently. Grey eyes shown with all the hurt he had been keeping inside, the hurt that still chips away at him at night, or whenever he's alone. "You know, if I were ever given the chance to chose, I would've chosen you." Stefan says as his fingers ghosted off the keys.

Damon looks up from his spot in the corner his blue eyes never meeting grey. "You would?" he voice had come out surprised though in his heart of hearts he had known it was true. Everything Stefan had said and hadn't said, Bonnie had once echoed the same words. The former had claimed that the problem with loving him, was that she and Stefan had built their world around him because they wanted him happy and his happiness had taken theirs away.

Stefan nod his head. "Yeah." he admits painfully so. He'll never forget this, forget what they had become-how Damon had taken a brotherhood and ruined it and now the memories that he did have of the two of them would forever be tainted- because he knew those memories didnt mean the same to his brother. "I loved her-" he began again, with a drawn out sigh. "I cant deny that its part of me, it was a huge part of me..." pause. "But I loved you more." Stefan says finally putting his head down.

Damon says nothing stunned by the emotion that is pouring out of his brother. He forget how fragile Stefan use to be. He forget about everything because it was easier to pretend that they weren't the same two teenagers that cried in secret when Lily died. Or pretend that they weren't the same two boys, brothers who had lye in bed with their dying mother because they wanted to be close to her before the end came and took her away to heaven.

For him it was easier to just not think about he and Stefan as a team and just think about himself, because that way he knew he wouldn't get hurt...ever again. He protected himself and in doing that he left Stefan wide open for anything and anyone to hurt him, but most of all he let himself turn into the monster that was his father. He treated Stefan the way Giuseppe had treated him- with utter disdain and a lack of worth.

Reaching for the bottle he gulps it down quickly. The revelation had come and actually realizing it, had been devastating. He wanted to fix that- he wanted to be the person that had deserved a brother like Stefan who would give up his world, if it had brought them closer. He wanted to be that type of man that would stop thinking so selfishly and actually wish the best for the people he loved (Stefan and Bonnie) even if they didn't want to love him back.

He braced his hands on his knees eyes, on the fire while he spoke. "That night, it was more about me then it was about you." he says to his silent brother. he looks up just in time to see the tick underneath the jaw of his brother. He knows Stefan was still mad, in fact he would go as far as to say that Stefan might never be able to move past what transpired between he and Elena. He knew that for Stefan it was about the betrayal, about the fact that two people he had loved not only dared to hurt him, but hurt Bonnie, the person he had cherished the most. He knew he had messed up royally-that it might take another one hundred years before he and his brother could ever be, brothers again- though he was sure they hadn't been that since that time they had been human. And he was to blame.

Tension filled the room as he and his brother looked at one another, Stefan with malice in his eyes and disgust that was so evident he almost let his brother walk away- yet the tiny voice in the back of his head stopped him. They needed to clear the air.

"It wasn't about you...or Bonnie." he says swallowing hard. He closes his eyes briefly and can see everything so clear. The way Elena had fitted against him. The flutter of her lashes, the smile she gave him, which he had thought was especially for him. He can remember it all, the things he had pushed his mind to toss away into a vault because even when he had finally gotten the girl he had wanted for so long, the taste had been bitter. He had wondered if he had been good enough for her, and then he kept thinking about what would happen if anyone found out about the two of them. You'd think when he got the girl, he'd be content, with her but with each kiss a bitter aftertaste was to follow. In the end, he gave up what he had for a chance with someone else and that had been a bitter pill for him to swallow.

In all his honest glory he could admit, he liked the idea of Elena, had liked the idea of finally getting a chance with her. He had been so blinded by it that he had forgotten the most important people in his life- which was his girlfriend and his brother.

Stefan lets out a dry laugh though its hollow. "Really?" Stefan asked with the tilt of the head. "You've been hell bent on destroying me, destroying everything you knew I loved. I think that night had everything to do with me!" the younger snapped. "You've been waiting nearly 200 years to get your revenge," pause. "Congratulations on finally succeeding!" Stefan says clapping his hands together slowly.

Blue eyes shoot daggers at the younger as his grits his teeth and clenches his fist. He deserves this, Stefan mocking him, teasing him about what he's lost but he trying to for once be the better brother and at least be honest with him. Stefan had deserved that. "I'm trying to be honest with you here." he says emotion pouring out of his words.

Stefan laughs and finally takes a seat again. He crosses his legs and places his chin on his hand. "Please continue then, we both know your feelings are almighty and superior." the younger says mockingly with a edge that only the ripper can bring out.

"Those were my issues." Damon said hitting his chest. "I needed to know that I was worthy of someone like Elena. She loved you, and your you and figured if someone like her could want me, as much as I wanted her maybe I had a chance, maybe I wasn't a lost cause after all." he says bringing his ice blue eyes down.

Stefan looks up and finally smiles, though it doesn't reach his eyes. "So this is your truth?" Stefan says his voice beginning to waver. "The great Damon Salvatore, brass, aggressive, possessive, jilted and inadequate." Stefan says poking his bottom lip out. "It must be easy being you, never really having to own up to what you do, and even if you do admit your wrong- you're never really wrong." Stefan says bored.

Damon shakes his head and walks over to the bar. He needs a fucking drink, this isn't how this was supposed to go. Yeah he knew Stefan was going to make this difficult, but he knew that Stefan still cared, he had heard him talking to Bonnie. He understood it, they couldn't trust him, they wanted him to crawl over broken glass to get to them, and he deserved...didn't mean he liked it but he got it. "I made a mistake." he says hands bracing on the table. "I let it get too far, I let my need consume me." he pauses again. "We let our lust cloud our judgement."

Stefan scoffs. "A mistake, a mistake is forgetting to stock the liquor cabinet!" Stefan says as he rubs his forehead. "You didn't make a mistake, you made a choice and now you have to live with that choice." Stefan says turning around to face his brother. "You chose her, over us, over our brotherly bond and over Bonnie" he says walking away. "Be man enough to own up to that shit!"

He swallowed back big gulp of bourbon deciding to take it straight from the tumbler instead of even bothering with a glass. " Did you ever think to wonder if I was trying to get it out of my system, that maybe I was too tired to fight it any longer, maybe we were to tired of fighting."

Suddenly he was standing at the window. "We didn't plan it, it just happen. The last thing I expected was falling into bed with Elena. We just looked at each other and everything that had been pent up between us exploded." he says softly.

Stefan snorts. "Well lucky for you and for her, you don't have to fight it anymore. You can be together and be miserable! You can have sex all over the place and not a single person would care." he says looking dead at his brother. "Because we've moved on." he says walking over to his brother. "Do you know how freeing it is not give a damn about you." the younger vampire says as a maddening giggle escapes his mouth. "But what's even better then knowing I'm done with you- is knowing that Bonnie got away too."

Damon growled while he clinched his fist.

Stefan continues. "She's happy, you know that." Stefan says looking at the fire. "And content." he looks at his brother. "And that's because she finally found someone who realized her worth. She'll never have to question Mason because he loves her."

The revlation that Mason is no doubt in love with Bonnie doesn't shock him as much as he knew Stefan had intended it to. He knew, because she was easy love. Had he admitted his own love for her earlier maybe they all wouldnt be in this situation in the first place.

It still angered him though, and it scared him because Mason could give Bonnie everything she had wanted.

"Stop it Stefan!" he grits veins protruding, fangs itching to make contact with skin, all while his brother gets in his face. He's seconds away from beating the shit out of him. Turning around he grabs the lapels of the crisp shirt his brother is wearing. "Shut up!"

Stefan grins. "She'd wake up in the middle of the night reaching for you and when she saw me, it was like reality set in all over again. So don't stand here and tell me you screwed Elena so that you and Bonnie could be together. Don't tell me you did it for anyone but yourself." he grits. "You didn't care about Bonnie, you never did she was just another girl like all the other girls, but she was one of the rare ones that walked away and I can sleep better at night knowing never get the chance to hurt her again, brother." Stefan says darkly.

"I love her." he screamed so loud he thought Bonnie would hear him. "I love her." he says breathing hard as his voice quieted down. "That first night, it may have been about Elena, I may have been hurt and she may have been hurt..." he says pausing. "But every night after that was my choice because I was falling in love with her. I knew I was bad for her, but I couldn't let her go because I was in love with her." he admitted almost defeated.

"Your selfish and you never deserved her, and you certainly never loved her." Stefan says to his stunned brother. "You never deserved either one of us." Stefan says calmly. "We were blindly dedicated to you- but not anymore." he says finally turning away. "We're done."

He watched as Stefan took long strides over to the stairs and knew, that if he didnt get this out now, things would never change. They'd never be the brothers his mother had hoped for them.

Standing in the middle of the room he holds hands out. "I'm sorry!" he says causing his words to echo throughout the house at the sheer velocity of it. "I'm sorry" he says again, this time his words are softer quieter. He can tell by how still his brother has gone that Stefan hadn't expected those words to ever come out of his mouth.

Stefan clicks his tongue. "You're sorry?" the caramel hair vampire asks as if the mere thought is ridiculous.

"I let my lust for Elena get the best of me." he admitted. "And I ruined your relationship...we Elena and I- we trashed everything we held so dear to us." he paused and looked around the room. Everything about this house screamed he and Stefan, they were the last remaining Salvatore brothers and unlike before where they had always found their way back to each other, he had feeling this time it was going to be much harder. "I'm sorry I let my lust for her, outweigh my love for you...and for Bonnie." he says waiting for a reaction for Stefan.

Silence deafening silence fills the room. And then.

Stefan turns and smiles a real smile. "I really do wish I could feel something...anything but I don't and I have you to thank for that." the grey eyed vampire says turning on his heel to escape the presence of his traitorous brother.

Defeated he watches as Stefan ignores his plea, his heartfelt apology. In a fit of anger he pushes over the bar causing glass to shatter on the floor. He watches as Stefan turns slowly looking non to amused. He was going to fight for Bonnie and Stefan no matter what and the only way he knew how to do that would be to tell Stefan about Bonnie. "You don't think I know I screwed up with the two of you, that I don't know that you hate me, that Bonnie can barely look at me. I hurt you both, the two people who loved me the most," he says gauging Stefan and his reaction.

Unimpressed Stefan crossed his arms in front of his chest and leant against the wall. "Is this suppose to be where I feel sorry for you because you screwed up? Where I listen to you bitch and moan about being loves bitch, and try to console your man pain?"

Damon looked to his brother. If this had been another time, he might smirk at him because Stefan with a backbone had always been better then wallowing in self pity Stefan. But now was not the time. He was here trying to prove he had something in him worth his brother giving a damn, worth the people who loved him limitless. "Im not asking for your pity." he says looking down. "I just, I need you to listen to what I have to say." he says looking up

When Stefan stood waiting for his reply, he cursed. This was going to ruin the progress he may have made with Bonnie but it was going to be worth it, because they both loved her. "You think I'm a selfish bastard with no redeeming qualities and you're probably right- but you and Bonnie...your all I have..."

Stefan licks his lips. "Not anymore." he says turning around swiftly. "I'm done." he says done with whatever game his brother was playing. This time away from Elena and Damon had done him some good. When two people you love hurt you, it makes you be more honest with not only yourself but the people around you and now he was real. He said what was on his mind when it was on his mind and he'd never be a doormat again.

"Wait. I know I'm selfish but im trying not to be, not with the two of you. So I'm going to tell you something that will probably ruin the progress I've made." he says reckless as ever. He had to trust that Stefan loved Bonnie then he hated him or this wouldn't work and they couldn't help her.

"Don't care."

"Its about Bonnie." he says causing his younger brother to turn around. At first he can see it in Stefans eyes, that he doesn't believe him but something must have given him away. He wasn't playing not with Bonnie.

"What about Bonnie?" Stefan asks almost panic stricken. "What's wrong with Bonnie?"

"I'll tell you everything."

**BB-BB-BB**

**Bonnie**

Their came a time in every girls life when you had two choices to make- you could either run and hide away like a little girl, or become the woman you always knew you could be. For me the time was now. I felt like after today I owed it to myself, to be honest. I wasn't perfect, in fact I was far from it. I had done things, said things that weren't ideal. I lied, though- I guess whenever I lied, it was to save someone from my truth, or from hurting. I kept secrets from the people I cared about because I was afraid of their reaction. Even Stefan, who I consider to probably be the only true soul mate I'll ever have- didn't know everything. Sometimes I hurt people, like Damon, because he hurt me. And other times I hurt people, like Mason, i didn't mean to but by holding onto pieces of a broken past, it could hurt him.

After speaking with Katherine I felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off of my shoulders or at least my conscious. I had been carrying around so much for so long that once I finally spoke about it and put it into the atmosphere I finally felt at peace. Even if it were only for a few moments, my talk with Katherine had brought me peace of mind and I didn't feel like I was going insane or drowning in my feelings anymore.

Everything Katherine had said to me had been right. Now that I was alone I could admit that. I had this habit of running away from things that scared me and Damon scared me... (hence the reason I was running away from him and his love). It was a hell of a lot easier than falling all over again, which I guess if I were honest I had never really stopped falling for him. I wanted to stop caring for him but I couldn't. He was he was in my veins and I couldn't deny that any longer.

As for Mason, my feelings for him were very real. I wouldn't have gone this far with him if I didn't feel something. What I felt for Mason may have not been exactly the same way I felt about Damon but that didn't mean it meant any less to me.

I realized that I was hurting everyone by being indecisive. I couldn't say I wanted to be with Mason and then pine away for Damon which was probably what I was doing now. And if I really wanted to be with Damon I couldn't bring up Elena when it suite me, I couldn't bring up how Mason was the perfect guy for me but I turned him down because for some damn reason I couldn't get him out of my head...or my heart obviously.

I loved two very different men, and while admitting it to myself was hard, admitting it to them would be even harder. I knew that I couldn't continue to go on this way. And at the end of the day someone was going to get hurt, and it could be me, or it could be one of them. The only thing I knew for sure was that I needed to own up to what I wanted, because we all deserved better than this. Mason deserved peace of mind, so he didn't always feel like he needed to look behind his back. Or so that he wouldn't fear Damon all the time. And Damon, well I either needed to set him free and mean it, or go back to him. As for me, I just needed to be honest with myself and with them and hope that everything else would fall into the right place.

I was well aware that this situation needed to be sorted out, by first I needed to be as good to Mason as he had always been to me and everything else would come later.

**BB-ML**

When I came to the top of the stairs my eyes locked on the man who had been pacing back and forth with so much velocity it nearly made my head spin. When he saw me, the smile he had given me could turn any girl to goo. Immediately I'm in his arms. He easily wrapped his arms around me, bringing me into a bone crushing hug. As always Mason made me feel safe, and loved. And I could only hope that I made him feel the same way, because I did love him. He nuzzled his nose against my skin causing me to shiver. It was so easy with Mason, I relished being close to him, and by the way he was holding me I knew he relished it as well. But as the minutes ticked off I felt like something was wrong.

Pulling back I looked at him. Both my hands were cradling the side of his face. "Hey" I say looking into his suddenly cloudy blue green eyes. "Mason-" I ask alarm in my voice. Before I can even finish my sentence he's pulled me real close to him and sealed his lips over mine.

His lips were harsh against my own and almost bruising. With every second that past it was like his kisses were getting more intense, more desperate...feverish even. Mason had never kissed me that way, not even that first night, which had been full of passion. This-this is different. His kisses are almost maddening and even when I try to slow things down, and take a much needed breather, seconds later he's back at it again.

His hands gripped me tighter and in response I tugged at hair causing an growl to escape his deep within his chest before he scooped me up on his arms. My legs wrapped around him while he nibbed at my bottom lip.

When the kiss was over I looked into his blue green eyes and it was then that I saw that shocked me into silence, and that had been fear. Fear of what, I was unsure. "How was the meeting?" I asked with my arms wrapped around his neck.

"I don't wanna talk about it." he says peppering kisses on my face. "Let me take you to bed." he whispered against my forehead. I open my mouth to say something just as he placed his mouth over mine again. Pulling away I looked up into his eyes and nodded my head as he carried me up the length of the stairs to my bedroom. Once inside, he kicks the door closed and lyes me on the bed. I watch as his eyes dart all over me, its like he's trying to memorize every single detail of me.

He leans forward and nips at her lip before pulling back just as quickly. For the life of him he cant stop thinking about what Katherine had said, and what Bonnie's reaction would be if she ever found out that once upon a time he too chased after Katherine (Katy) and her panties. Would she think he was doomed to want Elena like Damon had done so? And their was that jab about love. He knew what Katherine was hinting at, that Bonnie and Damon were supposed to be true love. They had their chance...Damon had his chance and now Bonnie, she was with him.

In his heart and in his mind he knew, that he would and could never hurt _her_. The way he felt for Bonnie was so strong, so vivacious that at times it had scared him. He knew he'd never be able to turn his back on her...he also knew that he'd never be able to lose her as well. He needed her, like he needed air. Like a lone wolf needed a pact, like a man needed his woman and most importantly like an alpha needed his mate. Bonnie Bennett had become all of those things to him and he _had to have her_.

"I need you." he says while tugging on her shorts. Every inch of exposed skin has his heart hammering in his chest. It was always like this, everytime he saw her, his breath catch in his throat. Inside of him, their was an animal begging to be released. A beast inside of him, is dying to claim her as his mate, and he will soon enough.

I stroked his face, while lying before him with nothing but my crisp white sheets as the background. His normally cool and calm eyes were different tonight, a fire had been lit and I had a feeling it had something to do with the power he was bestowed. He needed me, he needed me to take care of him and I would do just that. "Mason."

"Show me" he whispers. "Show me that you're mine and mine alone." he says as his big hands cradle my face.

"You have me." I say searching his eyes only to see fear. For some reason I'm suddenly nervous, so much that my hands are shaking. I take his paw like hand into my own and soon kiss it. He looks at me as if I'm holding his whole world in my hands, like I hold the key to his heart and its so honest, and so raw that nearly makes me jump back. Its startling for someone to give to you so freely.

I can't hurt him.

I smile up at him as the air between us change. My hands gone to the hem of his shirt, lifting it up to expose tanned skin stretched across taut muscles. "Let me take care of you." I say using magic to pin him to the bed. He's lying on his stomach as I've gotten the body oil. Carefully I crawl over him so that im straddling his behind. With hands full of oil I knead his flesh and when the first groan of pleasure hits my ears, I smile.

"You always know what I need." Mason says as he turns his head and looks at me. He gives me this come hither look, and soon I press my lips to his. Briefly as I close my eyes a flash of another man comes into view, I can make out his ice blue eyes and dark hair

**BB-ML**

"You okay?" he asked his hand sliding down my side. We hadn't gone further then kissing and body massages I had been too shaken up by the sight of Damon.

"Yeah." I say looking up to blue green eyes. "I was just thinking." I murmur softly.

Mason soon leans down and plants a sweet kiss to my lips. His hands have tangled in my hair and he's rocking slightly against me. A hiss escapes my mouth and his lips move from mine and latch to his favorite spot just below my earlobe, his tongue is dancing along my flesh.

"Mason," I half moan half whine as he nibbles and sucks the tender flesh in his mouth again. There is a warning in my voice. its not happening tonight, not like this, not how I was currently feeling.

"I know." he says placing his forehead against my own. "I wish we could, I wish I could take you right now" he says chuckling before resting his head on my bare stomach. "But I'll settle for this until I come back home." he says

If she had allowed him to sink himself into her, he'd never want to go and that would effect his pack. In fact if he had claimed her as his mate like he had wanted to tonight, he wouldn't be able to think straight because she would be the only thing on his mind and he needed a clear mind for what was in store for him and the pack.

"So," I pose while my hand runs through his thick hair."Do you want to talk about what got you so feverish?"

He runs his hand along her arm loving the feel of her soft skin underneath his calloused hands. The mere thought of losing her was what had gotten into him. Bonnie was everything he had wanted and he knew that he wouldn't be able to let her go, he had fallen fast for the young girl. She was the one for him, and yeah it may have been early but since when did love have a time limit.

"Maybe, I just wanted to be with my very sexy girlfriend." he says winking over at me.

I grin up at him as my hand travels beneath the sheet. I give him a little squeeze which rewards me with a moan. My hand sets a pace that works for both of us. I listen as his breath gets heavy as my pace slows down before stopping all together. "I don't doubt that," I say as he runs his hands through my thick dark hair. "But you were running from something." I should know, I was a runner. I was still running, this time I was just playing catch to Mason.

He holds onto her tighter. Only Bonnie could take one look at him and know everything. What was he running from? Well, his past. It hadn't bothered him that Katherine and Elena had resembled each other, especially when he thought Katherine was sucking the life out of poor some unfortunate soul across the globe. But now that he knew she was not only in town, but that she had become friends with Bonnie, he had this bad feeling about everything.

"Its nothing- just pack business." he lied. He watched as her brow furrowed causing the cute dimple above to crease.

"I'm sorry." I say licking my lips. "Whatever you need, just ask, I'm here for you."

He kissed my shoulder. "All I need is you."

I say nothing and snuggle close to him. If only we could stay in our protective bubble. We wouldn't have to deal with any threats in the form of crazy wolf snatching creeps, that are probably just beginning their reign of terror. The mere thought of the person who had abducted the wolves leaves me feeling unsettled, I had a bad feeling about this whole situation. It wouldn't end well for anyone involved.

**BB**

Before I know it, its time to say goodbye as Mason prepares to leave for his trip. We're both silent as we stand in front of each other. The truth of the matter, is that we're both terrified of what is to come. I'm afraid that whomever the sick individual is whose taken the wolves could possibly hurt Mason. As for Mason, I know what he's afraid of- he's afraid of Damon. He doesn't say it but sometimes he looks at me like I'm a mirage and other times he looks at me like he can see right through me..all of me just like Damon.

"I wont be able to get in touch with you." Mason says breaking the silence that has fallen between the two of us.

"I know." I say looking down at our interlocked hands.

"You gonna be okay?" he asked causing me to look up at him and smile. Even when he was the one going off to do dangerous stuff, he was still worried about me. Mason was the kind of guy that dreams were made up, he cared about my well being about my safety just as much as I cared about him. He was the perfect guy and I was lucky that he was in my life.

I look up at him. "As long as you're okay, I'm okay." I say causing him to pull me close to him. He places a kiss to my forehead, causing me to lean that much closer to him. I inhale his scent, as I'm surrounded by his warmth and close my eyes content in this moment.

"I love you...I'm in love with you." he whispers against my skin causing me eyes to shoot open. Did he just say he loved me?

I flick my eyes up to his to make sure I wasn't hearing things and the smile he gives me is unsure but just as bright.

He scratches the side of his face and chuckles nervously. "This isn't the way I wanted to tell you." he says with a slight chuckle. "But it's true, I do love you..." he says as his eyes scan her face to gauge her reaction. For the most part she looks surprised, though he doesn't know why or how she can be surprised. He loves her, he felt it way before Katherine came back and started shit. He just loves her. "I know it may seem early for you,"

I open my mouth willing words to come out, as Mason continues his confession.

"You don't have to say it back-not yet." he says smiling. His hands are wet because he's nervous everything is on the whim but everything between the two of them has been that way and he wouldn't change it not for anything. "But I would like for you to wear my dog tags." he says removing the necklace off of us neck. "I want you to know that I'm coming back for you...and only you."

I feel like my voice isn't working properly so I do the only thing that I can do right now, and that is to lean on my tip toes and place a kiss to his lips.

When I pull away Mason has this look of serenity of his face.

Later when he finally leaves I stand at the curb watching his tail lights till they fade away. I look up to the sky hoping against all hope for a miracle because right now, I feel like we need it.

**A.N. 2**: For those hoping for more friendship moments we have the much needed return of Bonnie, Stefan and Caroline! and coming real soon Bonnie will take a much needed break from the men in her life.


End file.
